::Troublesome Immortality Obsession::
A/N: This is my TIO! My new baby, and I hope you all love it as much as I do!
Warning: Unbeta'ed, cursing, attempts of suicide, a bit of OC.
Disclaimer: Music: The Rasmus and Papa Roach, Naruto :Kishimoto
Chapter: :1: :Troublesome immortality::
Dear suicide aide-mémoire:
Bring my pain to rife
Take my hope to the grave
Alone my tears accompany
To my sin of life
Say goodbye to all I know
Say hello to all I not
Revive my hell bind to rut
And let me free to love's path
Riiiiiiiiiiiiiing!
Class started and a gloomy red head was extremely excited about his first day of school starting. He just can't stand the joy he has to come back to classes after two very short months. It was just too much happiness to bear inside his happy little heart.
"I'm going to blow up this stupid school." The red mumbled after hearing the annoying school bell.
He walked through hallways; listening to the mp3 his older sister gave him for his birthday. He was listening to one of his favorite group, Papa Roach. Finally arriving to his first class of the day he sits in the last chair in the classroom. He takes one earplug out and waits for the boring class to start. When the teacher thought everyone was inside, he called attendance. After that extremely long list of names, he told everyone his name and told everyone to copy the class rules in the chalkboard. Everyone, like good little angels in the first day in school started to copy the stupid rules that will be broken more times than a girl changes clothes.
The red head heaved a sigh and pushed his earplug back. He grabbed his notebook and started to draw and raised his head once in a while to appear like he was writing the dumb rules.
Whoa-o. whoa-o. yeah, yeah..
"Subaku."
You say I'm looking really bad,
"Subaku Gaara."
you say I'm looking really sick,
"Gaara!"
and I don't even care. I never really did.
"GAARA!"
The teen jumped out of his sit, pulling both his earplugs out at the same time he put pause on the song and angrily answered the teacher.
"What!" He said annoyed that his teacher was already bugging him, and not even five minutes of class have passed.
The teacher's brown eyebrow twitched. He raised a paper in his hand in the air with a fake smile.
"Principal Tsunade is calling you to her office. You're excused. Take your things."
The red head raised an eyebrow and tilted his head in confusion. 'Calling me to the principal's office in the first day, and not even an hour has passed? Damn, I'm good. But, what did I do?'
Subaku nodded at the teacher and silently he gathered his stuff in his bag and hanged his messenger bag on his shoulder. He exited the little classroom, silently ignoring every stare he got from everyone inside. He marched to the well-known direction of the principal's office, putting his earplug back in his ears. He pressed play.
So when push comes to shove and slap you in the face.
He turned in a corner and started singing silently with the song.
Just remember one thing…
He continues walking the long corridor while mumbling the song softly, his fingers moving according to the music.
When it's time to fill the void my whole life has been destroyed and everyone around me says my time is running out.
I refuse to surrender, I refuse to surrender
He stopped in front of a red door.
So when I'm out of control and out of my mind. Just remember one thing. I think I'm just fine. So catch me-
Opening the door silently he looked inside the room, seeing the back of the comfy dark chair where the principal was currently seating, he decided to enter.
I wont remember anything at all. So catch me when I fall
He took his two earplugs off and stared at the principal looking outside her window behind her desk. His green eyes looked at the sunny day outside the crystal clear window and he cringed. He never really did like the sun, or light, or anything shinny like that except maybe fire. He heard the principal turning her chair to his direction. Her face was adorned with a grim expression. She released a long heavy sigh. Reaching for a paper on the corner of her desk, she turned towards the red head that was looking at every movement she made with critic eyes.
"Please, sit down." She said softly.
Not bothering to say no to the offer the teenager sat in one of the new furniture that the principal must have bought during the summer. They were much more comfortable than the last ones, not that he got to sit on them a lot, the principal always just tells him the time he must pay for any fights he had started and send him home without another word. It was really rare for the director to assign him to take a sit. From what he remembers, he has done nothing to cause this.
'I wonder why she call me for?'
Green eyes locked with hazelnut eyes; the woman turned her gaze away from the piercing emeralds. He frowned. 'What the hell is going on?'
"Gaara." The woman started softly, which unnerved the young red head. She never called him by his first name and never did she dare use that kind of tone with him. "I received a call, not too long ago, about…"
Ok this was getting to be an annoying ordeal for the red head. "About?" The red head persuaded, a little of annoyance was laced in his tone as he stared at his school's principal in the eyes.
The blonde woman sighed once again and began the continuation of her statement. "Your older siblings."
Something inside the red head's head was telling him not to listen to the elder woman, to just run and go home and call his siblings. His heart started to beat faster and faster. He swallowed heavily and narrowed his eyes to the woman in front of him. "What about my siblings?" He said, his voice sounding more uncertain for his taste.
"The plane they were using to return to Konoha crashed. No one made it." The woman finished silently with sad eyes, staring at the teen in front of her with painful sympathy.
He hated those eyes with a passion. His heart clenched painfully, but the red head made no movements. His face emotionless like the person in front of him just told him that today's weather was sunny. He nodded in understanding and stood up from his chair silently.
Tsunade stared at his pupil with confusion and understanding, it was hard to completely understand, but she knew he didn't like to show weakness in front of anyone, even if it was too hard to control. She stood up when she saw the boy reaching for the doorknob.
"I'm sorry for your lost. I excused you in all your classes. Please recover, and if you need anything, please don't hesitate to ask me."
The red head wanted to snort when he heard the woman say those words, but he was not about to say anything, incase his angry outburst ends in a cascade of unstoppable tears and rage. He nodded without turning, opened the door and exited the room.
His ears were banging, his heart was broken, his eyes stung with unshed tears and his hands bleeding as he kept clenching his fists tightly. Tsunade's words were engraved in his head, they repeated over and over like a mantra. He didn't want to believe that what she said was true. He refused to believe it. It must be all just a sick joke or something. With that little string of hope the red head darted out of school and headed towards his home.
He ran fast, without looking back or sideways, not caring the weird looks he was getting. He just wanted to get to his house and call his siblings, the phone will ring a couple of times, then Temari will answer and start whining because Gaara was calling again to ask for another souvenir and everything will end just fine. The principal just wanted to get back at him for every problem he had caused her these last three years. Yeah that was all.
'Finally!' Arriving to his house he unlocked the door with his key and yanked the door open and ran to the only phone in his house and started dialing Temari's phone number.
"We are sorry, but the line you have reached is out of service for the moment. Please try again later."
"No! Damn it!" He hanged the phone and tried again.
"We are sorry, but the line you have re-"
He hung the phone again frustrated. "Damn it!" His hands trembled with his grip he had on the telephone. He breathed heavily and couldn't stop the water that pooled inside his eyes. He shook his head with the tears. 'Maybe, they don't have signal. Yeah that's it. They just don't have enough bars. I did tell Temari her telephone was a junk.' He nodded to his thoughts.
He released a heavy sigh, contempt with the thought he just had and left the phone a rest and walked to his room to take a rest. He suddenly felt too tired. Entering his room, he threw his bag pack in a corner, he took his shoes off, his shirt was in the floor soon after with a pair of jeans. And like dreams were calling, he was unconscious when his body touched the soft cushions of his bed.
Dream
"Gaara." Someone was shaking him out of his deep sleep, but he didn't want to wake up, so he grumbled a grumpy go away and turned his back on his trespasser.
The red head heard a growl from behind him, but decided to just ignore it, and keep sleeping, but the person behind him was very, very persistent.
"Gaara, wake up! We finally arrive home and this is our welcome?"
His eyes widened in realization. He sat up and turned to his intruder, his sister. "Temari?" He asked dumb folded.
"Well of course! Come on help us unload the baggage in the trunk of the car!"
Gaara smiled internally and nodded in agreement to his sister. "I'll be there in a moment." He said.
"Good." Temari said smiling. "Because we got you a lot of souvenirs that you are going to love!" She said exiting the door.
The red head smirked. 'I knew the principal was just telling a sick joke.' He released a sigh and grabbed some pants and pulled them on. After that he exited the house, not bothering to hurry, he opened the front door expecting the front lawn, Kankuro's car and his siblings taking the luggage out of the car, but what he encounter was nothing like that.
Green eyes widened at the scene in front of him. His hands shaking, his heart accelerated, he closed and opened his eyes a couple of times but the picture didn't disappeared. He turned around but his house was gone. 'What the hell?' He turned around back and forward. He was standing on an Ocean!
He felt the water under his feet but he wasn't sinking. He couldn't comprehend what was happening; maybe he hit his head while exiting or something. He heard an extremely loud noise coming from up in the air. He looked up, but he couldn't see anything. The sound was getting louder and louder every time. It sounded like…
'No.' He shook his head vigorously. 'No.' He denied that what he was hearing was what he thought. This must be an illusion or something of the sorts. There was just no way. He refused. He looked back up and his eyes widened. An airplane. It was descending. It was falling too fast. 'This can't be…'
The airplane had smoke, creating a trail behind. His heart was crashing, as he saw the plane coming even closer to him. When the plane was too close, he closed his eyes and waited for impact. The airplane crashed in the ocean, making the water raise and waves of huge amount of water were sent to movement. Fire adorned the back part of the airplane. His eyes widened when he saw people trying to escape. 'Maybe…' He didn't think, before he darted towards the plane. He could hear people screaming in pain and panic, the loud sound of the sinking plane hurting his sensitive ear when he finally reached it.
"Te-" As soon as he tried to scream his sister's name the plane exploded, releasing an extremely hot air that pushed him away from the plane.
End Dream
"No!" Gaara jerked up from his bed in heavy breaths, clutching his sheets with his fisted hands. His red hair clung in to his face as he searched his whereabouts. He was in his room. 'It was a dream?'
He stared down at his lap, as he remembered his dream. Or better said, his nightmare. It felt so real it unnerved him in so many ways. He looked around his dark room and sighed. He stood up from his bed and walked out to the living room. When he got there he stood in front of the television, hesitating, knowing that when he turned the device he will not like one bit what he will see and hear. He sighed again and clenched his jaw tightly as he reached to turn the T.V on.
The screen turn lighter as the color dispersed and created a person speaking.
"In other news, we have the names of the people that died in the flight 905, family and friends that are not certain if their love ones are one of the passengers aboard in the plane…please take notice."
Gaara's heart did a flip-flop and hope ran in his vain as he searched for the list. Seeing it in the screen his heart stopped in the same time as his breath did.
9. Tomishi Korisaki
10. Taineku Juugo
11. Subaku Kankuro
12. Subaku Temari
As soon as he saw the names of his brother and sister he turned the television off. He stood there in silence proceeding to a depression mode that he tried to avoid. Why did he have to turn the T.V on? Did he really want to know that his two siblings died in that plane? In that plane that he saw in his dream? Maybe, he just wanted to be certain. Maybe this is still a nightmare, which he still is unable to wake up. He walked back to his room and turned the radio on as loud as it could get. The first song that started was so out of place it was perfect. His depression plus this song will definitely lead to cutting, which he will surely do, eventually.
Heart of misery
He lay back on his small bed and stared at the sealing while listening to the music.
I don't wanna be anything today
(I don't wanna see anything today)
The phone rang, but the noise was drowned by the music. Green eyes closed slowly and opened in a sleepy manner.
Everything I own, I just wanna be alone
(I just wanna know that you wanna know)
I don't wanna live through another day!
(I don't wanna live through another day)
Meaningless to fight for the victory
I just wanna die in the heart of misery
The phone kept ringing, but the red head paid no mind to it. He sat up and reached under his bed for something. Finally grasping the object, he pulled out a black box that belonged to his oldest converse that he currently owns. He smiled sadly at the box and caressed it like someone would do to a pet they loved. He opened the box and scanned the context. Inside he found a brand new razor his body was aching to test. He took the little object out of the box, and threw the box in the floor with all context scattering in the floor. Some pictures catching his eyes. He smiled at the picture of him and his siblings while situating the blade across his wrist.
"See you two soon." He whispered.
I 'll never be anything again
I 'll never be anything again
I'm tired of give, I don't wanna try
He released a sigh and cut his wrist, hissing softly. He cut himself a couple of more time; still he didn't feel dizzy so he decided to cut his other wrist as well. Cutting side ways, he watched as the dark liquid descended from his pale wrist to the cold teal floor under him. He heaved a trembling breath. Feeling already light headed, he sat on the floor. While he closed his eyes he heard the last part of the song.
One fight
Lock me in the heart of misery
One love
One fight
Lock me in the heart of misery
Ahah, ahah
In the heart of misery
Ahah, ahah
Riiing!
He finally heard the phone ring, but he didn't move. He just sat there until he lost consciousness.
In the heart of misery!
*Time: 2:04 am*
Pale green eyes opened slowly, wincing at the pain he felt all around his body. Why his body ache, Gaara didn't know. He couldn't remember anything previous to the present time he was awakening. He looked around. 'I'm in my room.' He looked down when his hand touched something wet. The room was too dark, so he couldn't indentify what was the liquid in the floor by just looking, but when he smelled it his eyes widened. He remembered everything that happened the day before and his eyes saddened, then he narrowed his eyes and examined his wrists. His eyes widened once again when he felt his hand perfectly healthy, not a slit in sight.
"What the fuck?" He yelled looking at his wrist like they just grew heads. "I mean what the fuck?" He stood up and turned the lights on.
"Tsk. One would think after dying they would learn to control their foul language. How troublesome."
The red head turned his head towards a brunette that appeared out of nowhere, currently seating on his bed. He was at first speechless. What the hell was a guy doing in his room, on his bed and to sum it all up, he just said that he died. "What?" He said gritting his teeth to control the anxiety attack that was currently threatening to come in any moment if he didn't get answers.
The lazy looking brunette raised an eyebrow and then yawned. He lay back against the wall behind the bed, his hand tucked behind his head. "Are you daft?" He said boringly.
"No. But you soon will be if you don't tell me what the hell are you doing here and who the fuck are you!" The red head said glaring daggers at the uncaring guy in the bed.
The brunette shrugged and raised one finger. "First, can you turn the radio off, is making me loose the non-exiting hearing I own."
"What?"
"…" The brunette just stared at the red head that was still glaring at him.
The red head growled, leaned down without taking his eyes off of the brunette and took a lamprophyre rock from his scattered things in the floor and threw the rock without looking at the radio, successfully hitting the machine, making the radio stop and make a strange noise that clearly says it got off.
"Impressive." The brunette said.
"Speak." The red head growled.
Gaara really didn't like people entering his personal place without his permission, especially since he doesn't even recognize the poor devil that will soon die if he doesn't give a legitimate excuse, which Gaara will totally ignore and kick this mother fuc-
"I'm kinda like your reaper, or death or even maybe your uardian angel. Whatever you want to call me."
"…" Gaara stared at the man in front of him, seating on his bed like he just said how the weather would be tomorrow. His red eyebrow twitched. His right hand twitched and so did his left. 'This guy, I'm going to bury him alive.'
"It would do, no good." The brunette said.
"What?" '…he's talking about what I thought?'
"Yes."
'What the fuck?' Gaara thought slightly, amazed, creep out and angry that the man could actually read his thoughts.
"You like your foul language don't you?" The brunette said sighing.
'You can read my mind?' The red head thought, just to try and investigate his discovery.
"Yes, I can." The brunette said in a bored manner.
The brunette could have said he was God and the red head wouldn't have believed him, but now that he thought about it, in the Bible stated that people didn't believe in Jesus to be the son of God and look what happened. Maybe he shouldn't be quick to judge. 'What am I thinking? I've never even read a single page of the Bible except the apocalypse!'
"I'm not surprise." The guy in the bed said.
The red head scanned the bored man on his bed. He looked human, he didn't have anything special except he was wearing all black, but the reapers are suppose to be a personification of death in the form of a cloaked skeleton wielding a large scythe. He doesn't even have a scythe!
"… If you're what you said you are then…where's your scythe?" Gaara asked suspiciously.
"Because I'm not an actual reaper. I'm just supposed to follow you around until you mysteriously die and then I'll take you to wherever you belong. Oh and the scythe is only needed when doing the duty in taking a charge's soul to wherever they belong to."
'What about the cloaked skeleton thing the reapers are known to have?' Gaara asked mentally.
'That's just a pile of BS people say.' The brunette said mentally responding the red head.
"Fucking hell! You can talk to me in my mind as well?" (That was so OC)
The brunette's lip twitched. "Yeah."
"Wait." The red head said finally realizing something. "Are you supposed to take my soul? Am I dead already?"
The brunette shook his head. "No, you're not dead."
The red head frowned and stared at the brunette confused. "Then why the hell are you here for?"
The brunette sighed again. "I guess I'll have to explain. What a drag." He said seating correctly in the bed. "Ok. I'm a special reaper, like you're a special human. I'm one of the few selected dead humans that are turned to reapers because…well basically because we did nothing, neither good nor bad. Our lives were just useless to say it bluntly."
"Ok. What does that have to do with you being in my room and on my bed in my time killing zone?"
The brunette scowled at the red head. "I'm getting to that, so shut it." The red head glared at the lazy guy but shrugged it off to keep listening to the explanation. "After I died I was sent to guard a special human until he dies. You see, you're this human, but you're not an easy kill my friend." Gaara frowned at this. "You're immortal."
Gaara's eyebrow rose a bit; then he frowned then he smirked. "Right." He said obviously not believing the brunette.
The lazy guy rolled his eyes, noticing the sarcasm the younger teen was using. "Look at your wrists. You cut your self last night and you didn't die. They just healed in time."
There the red head frowned starting to believe the man was actually telling the truth. But is it possible? Is it really? He shook his head, frowning at the memory of his siblings. He didn't want to believe it even if it were the truth. He wanted to die just to be with them.
"Why?" Gaara asked.
"I'm not sure. I was just sent here, to you."
"Can I…die in someway?"
The brunette shrugged. "I have no idea. I just know that you're immortal and killing your self will not be easy, so give it up. It's too troublesome."
"But, I have no reason to live anymore." Gaara whispered. He fisted his hands. "What's your name?" He asked out of the blue.
"…Nara. Nara Shikamaru."
The red head nodded. "Gaara." The red head said.
The brunette chuckled. "I know." The brunette said.
"Hn." The red head looked around the floor. He gathered the things in the floor and piled them inside his black box, taking outside a pile of money. He walked to his closet, completely ignoring the curious gaze he was receiving; he grabbed a bag pack and started filling it with his clothes and soon putting his black box inside in a corner of the bag. He swung it to his shoulder, grabbed his mp3 and turned to the brunette.
"We should go." The red head said.
"Why?" Shikamaru asked.
"Because I bet my father is going to sell this place in less than a week and he won't hesitate to throw me to the adoption program, which I know you know I wont do good in."
The brunette shrugged and followed the red head outside the small house to a new start in life and death. 'Such a troublesome immortality.'
---------------The end of the very first chapter of TIO---------------
A/N: Just so you all know…This story is an experiment and will only be updated if the experiment is liked. If not, I'll just erase it. Or it might stick a while longer…it really just depends on the kinds of reviews I receive. ^.^
Nice reviews usually win the conquer, but a review non-the less makes me want to update faster. If I find that people don't like what I do then I will just stop doing the story.
So if you want more REVIEW!
If not, then DON'T.
Oh!=====Updates: Once a month…but it actually depends more on the reviews…
