Just Tell Him

Gary has a secret to tell his grandfather, but will it actually come out? Written for Coming Out Day.

This one is a departure for me, style wise, as I'm sure you'll notice if you've read my other stuff. Short sentences? Short paragraphs? Under a thousand words? What sort of craziness is this?

I gave myself a few specific challenges with this one and I'm actually really happy with the way it came out (heh), and I hope y'all like it as well. I always want to write something for any sort of LGBTQ+ day or event but it rarely actually happens, so actually writing something for Coming Out Day was the first challenge. I wanted to keep the sentences short, kinda staccato in a way, to reflect the choking effect that fear and anxiety can cause, especially with something as major as coming out to someone important. I wanted to avoid over-saturating the story with details so I challenged myself to keep some ambiguity (is the friend mentioned Ash or Tracey? do they have something going on or is it just friendly encouragement? Interpret it as you desire). And, final challenge, cutting out dialogue tags entirely.

I hope you like it. I hope maybe it helps to encourage some people who may be struggling with coming out.

Anyways, enjoy! Let me know what you think.

… … …

"Just tell him."

The words echoed through his head in a constant loop, just as they had for years.

Just tell him.

If only it were that easy.

He'd tried. Many times, in fact. But the words lodged in his throat each time, his most sincere fears blocking them from reaching his lips.

"You know he won't mind."

If only that knowledge soothed his fear.

It boiled within him every time he mustered up the courage. And it took over every time, without fail.

"He's always had your back. This won't be any different."

Except this secret was the one, perhaps the only thing that might change that.

It was a small risk. Very small, indeed. The odds were in his favor, but the cost was too high, the possible loss too great.

Fear froze him. The terror held him in place, as it had so many times before.

It gnawed at his insides. But the desire, nay, the very need to be his true self ate away at his very soul.

He had to do this.

Today. Tomorrow. The next day. It had to be done. To put it off would only extend his suffering.

To just get it over with would put an end to it… Or open up a new world of pain.

No.

Thinking like that wouldn't help.

It was time to face his fears.

"You've got this."

His hand trembled where it rested on the knob to the office door before him. He took a deep breath and cast a final glance at his dark-haired friend.

"It's going to be fine."

He took another deep breath and steeled himself as he turned the doorknob and opened the door.

"Hey, Grandpa… I need to talk to you."

The door closed behind him as the professor looked up from his computer screen. He heard the other teen lean against the door, trapping him in the room.

Now or never.

"I'm gay."

The silence echoed.

His heart pounded.

Gray eyebrows rose slightly and those eyes he had known his entire life regarded him just as kindly as ever.

He fidgeted beneath that wise gaze, hoping beyond hope that this was it. That his friend had been right all along. That his fears had been only that.

That everything was, indeed, okay.

Finally, a warm smile appeared.

"Is that all?"

He swallowed past the lump in his throat and nodded mutely.

Please say something.

A weathered hand gestured to a nearby chair, which Gary quickly sank into.

"Then why so nervous?"

Unable to speak, hardly able to breathe, Gary could only manage a slight shrug of the shoulders.

The warm smile grew thoughtful as the professor continued to regard him.

"All those years picking on Ash, being an arrogant know-it-all, and I always stood by your side. Why would this be any different?"

It felt as though his heart skipped a beat.

The world seemed to stop for a moment.

Was that it?

All of the fear and anxiety… For that?

"Don't you know me better than that, Gary?"

Relief. Finally. It flooded through him and his breath left him in a shaky laugh.

He tried for a witty retort but his voice failed him. The lump in his throat returned with a vengeance and he struggled to choke out a response, any response.

"Too much to lose."

Just four words. But even those were a battle all their own.

The sheer relief overwhelmed him. It left him trembling, scarcely able to believe that this task was finally done and over with.

The anxiety and fear and absolute pain of hiding were over.

He had to bite his lip to stifle the sob that threatened to spill out.

His grandfather noticed and fixed him with another gentle smile.

"I'm flattered that our relationship means so much to you."

A hand reached out.

The simple move offered so much – love, comfort, but most of all, acceptance.

Gary reached out as well and allowed the larger hand to grasp his own.

"Thank you for telling me."

Warmth surged through him and, for once, he could breathe freely.

Finally.