Karkat was having a bad day so he went to a bar to get wasted.
"God damn fuckass strider coolkid," he mittered biting into his bologny and cheese grub sanwich. He chewed angrily.
"Do you need more alcohol buddy?" the sexy barman asked politely. He was so kawaii evne his butt had kawaii sparckles when he walked places. His nametga said "Erriadn Ampora"
Karkat turned to the sexy barman "No fuck you I am not your buddy" he said blushing very redly (it's a humanstuck au everyone blushes red not just him) "but yes I need booze give me some fuckass"
"But mr. you look pretty drunk already are you srue your can walk home okay" Equidan sad concernedly.
"I am fine give me the drinks you sparckly fuck" karkata respondes agrily because he has a short temper and no patience for kawii fuckasses. Still blushing because the barmaid was hot and had tight purple pinstripe pnats tht showed off his buttocks and tighths well
"No you are drunk enough" Eridan said gestating to the lagre pile of empty beer botles "you were mumbling about terezi dumbping you so I will take you home and maek shore you get into bed ok" he scooped up karkat in his arms which were strong even though he was all skinny and emo and shit
"fuck no put me donw I will piss on you karkat whined biting at eridans hipster scarf. It was drak blue plad and it had a fringe and it smelld like coffeehouse nad feremones which turnd karkta on but he didn't knew it though
Eridan threw karkles on the bak of his sexycool morotcycle nd drove to his house not karkats
He carried karkat into his house bridal styel and threw him on the bed and put his thing in the other guys thing (they have human parts not tentakles and nooks or some shit) and they did it wit lots of lobe
It was really good and karkat scratched up eqidans back all sexy like and whispered "fuck you salty fish motherfucker I hate you go faster" because eridan was a sailor and he had his fush all hung up no his walls.
Eredan said "oh baby your so good keep doing thta thing mmmff" then there was jizz everywhere from both of them
Eride grapped a towel and cleaned them up and then karkat started crying "wy are you crying karkles sweetie" eridan asked all sensitive and sniffly. His eyes got big and sparckly as his looked down on hs lover.
"I just loe you so muh plese let me stay here tonight" he snifled
"of course babu you can stay forever" eridan said and tears of happiness ran down karkats face because he was used to being a loner.
Then they felle aslep all snuggled up together as boyfrends
