AN: So, as the summary suggests, this is a pretty depressing fic. There's some humor sprinkled in it but overall you should get a serious case of the feels. It pains me to put Stein and Marie in this position but, should you choose to read it, I hope you learn something and/or it touches you.
It may sound cliché, but it honestly is amazing how much your life can change overnight.
Day 1
(Marie)
I've been living with Stein ever since Lord Death assigned me as his partner. Although Asura and Medusa were no longer threats, Lord Death believed it would be best I stay with Stein for a while to abate any lingering madness possessing Stein. I believe he made the right call as Stein has seemed rather withdrawn since the battle, almost to the point of depression.
I hear the front door open from my comfy position on the living room couch, where I'm reading my book. Stein enters looking rather exhausted- slouching posture and dark bags under his eyes. I guess he has been up late experimenting again. "I'll be getting ready to cook dinner after I finishing reading this chapter. What would you like for dinner, dear?" I ask with a smile. I know the man is not exactly affectionate but I can't help but love and care for him.
"Nothing really. I think I'll just go to bed," he grumbles and retreats to his room. OK, now I'm worried. This is clearly a sign of depression, right? Withdrawn, trouble sleeping, not eating- it seems to fit.
I follow him to his room, but he has already locked himself in there. I knock on the door and shout, "Stein! I have to cook dinner anyway for myself so I'd rather cook something we both can eat. Is there anything in particular you have in mind?" Maybe if I try a subtle approach he'll open up.
Silence. "Stein, you really should eat something," I plead. I hear movement and then steps coming towards the door. He opens the door and stares at me with an apathetic face, not making any movement. He seems to be considering something. Maybe he's deciding what to eat I hope.
"Fine. Cook something. I'll eat a little," he finally says and slowly closes the door without changing his expression.
I'm glad I was able to barely get through to him but I still feel bad. As if I disturbed him or forced him into something he didn't want to do. I hope I didn't piss him off. Maybe after a good, home-cooked meal he'll be friendlier. I start boiling some water and look in the pantry for what types of pasta we have in stock. Once, in one of his more jovial moods, Stein mentioned that spaghetti is one of his favorite foods because it reminds him of dissections. Unfortunately, it looks like we only have ziti in stock but I guess that'll have to do.
As I wait for the water to boil I sit down at the kitchen table and let my mind wander about the situation at hand. I sigh, it would probably be best if I talk to Spirit even though I don't really want to. He knows Stein the best. Even though Spirit is almost as emotionally distant as him I do know for a fact he cares about him. He wouldn't want his childhood friend and former meister doing something regretful. I decide to give him a call.
"Oh, hey, Marie. What's up?" I can sense the uncertainty in his voice. He must be wondering why I'm calling. I don't want to worry him too much if I'm wrong, but I'll also regret it if I don't get the proper help for Stein and it's too late.
"Hey, Spirit. How would you like to come over for dinner?"
There's a slight pause. "Um, why? I don't mean to be rude it's just that last time I was there…"
"OH! No, no, no! It's not like that! Stein isn't going to experiment on you again," I laugh nervously. "It's just… I think he could use a friend now."
"'A friend?'" he repeats. He seems to know what I was getting at. "Yeah, I'll be there for him."
"Great! Dinner will be ready in about an hour. I know that's short notice but I hope you can come."
"It's no problem. See you then."
I hang up and pour the ziti into the boiling water. "Who was that?" I jump as I hear a deep, bland voice entering the kitchen. I turn to see Stein and regain my composure, "Oh! You startled me! Spirit is coming over to join us for dinner." Crap! How much of our conversation did he hear?!
A slightly insane grin begins to spread on his face and his glasses hide his eyes by reflecting the room's lights. "Oh, Senpai is coming to visit? I remember the last time he was here…"
"NO! I told him there would be none of that! We are going to have a nice dinner. No experiments! Now go wash up; you have enough time," I demand, almost like a mother.
He grunts as if resenting being told what to do but still complies and departs for the bathroom. I hope I didn't aggravate him. I'm trying my best to keep things calm and his soul at peace right now.
(1 hour later)
Stein cleaned up nicely and looks his best in quite a while. I guess I made the right decision by inviting Spirit over. I ask Stein to set the table as I'm putting the salad, vegetables, and ziti into display dishes and arranging them in an aesthetically pleasing manner. The doorbell rings. "That must be Spirit! I'll get it!" I say cheerfully and bounce to the front door. Stein sits at the kitchen table and examines his knife. I know he's reminiscing of past experiments and planning future ones. I hope he's not planning on doing any tonight. I open the door. "Hello, Spirit! Right on time. I'm so glad you can join us!"
Spirit enters. "Well, thanks for having me!" He seems overly polite and happy, like he feels the need to put on a show.
"We don't have to wait. Let's go to the kitchen and eat!" I say and begin to lead the way, but Spirit gently grabs my arm to stop me.
He leans in and whispers, "I'm assuming this isn't just a casual get together. I've noticed Stein has been off more than normal lately, too."
"You're right. I'm sorry. I should have told you I'm worried about him and I hope you can help," I whisper back.
"Not a problem. What are friends for?" He smiles and pats my shoulder reassuringly. "I say it's about time we eat!" he exclaims excitedly as he walks past me towards the kitchen. I follow behind him.
When we reach the kitchen Stein is still sitting at the table examining his knife. He doesn't even acknowledge we're in the room. "Hey, pal. How about you put the knife down?" Spirit said seemingly nervous. The sight must bring back some bad memories of Stein experimenting on him. Stein slowly and quietly puts the knife down and looks at Spirit. "How was your day?" Spirit continues, while taking a seat at the table. I go to retrieve the food and listen intently to their conversation.
"Just the same as always. You know that, Spirit." Stein replies dully.
"Yes. It's been quite uneventfully now that Asura has been defeated, but I think that's a good thing, don't you?" Spirit banters while attempting to turn the conversation around.
"I suppose," Stein consents in a flat voice. He rests his chin in his left hand and fiddles with his knife in the right.
Seems like a better time than ever for me to interrupt. I came over to the table with pasta dish first. "I made your favorite, Stein!" I say enthusiastically as I place the dish down on the kitchen table. "Baked ziti!"
I straighten up and try to observe his reaction but he seems emotionless. He stares for a few seconds at the ziti, lowers his head, and then growls, "I told you spaghetti is my favorite. You should know that."
I'm taken aback. "Oh. That's right. I do know that. I'm sorry. You know I'm scatterbrained sometimes but I do know you love pasta!" I laugh, trying to lighten the mood.
Stein sweeps his left arm across the table as he stood up. Half of the dishes, including the ziti, and silverware on table fall to the floor in a cacophonous clatter of clanging, breaking, and splattering. I'm transfixed at the unexpected outburst and stare at my hard work on the floor until I realize Stein is still holding the knife in his hand.
"Don't pretend to know me when you clearly don't!" he shouts while gripping the knife in his hand even tighter.
I'm fearful. Is he being overcome by madness again? It's taking all my strength not to transform and attack. My instincts tell me he is a threat to my life, but I'm not going to hurt him at all. If I do, then he will lose trust in me, and in turn I will lose him.
"Stein! That's enough!" Spirit shouts while standing up. My decision to invite him proves to be a good one after all. Stein relaxes and for a brief moment seems regretful, but stubbornness shows in his face again. I collapse on the floor to my knees and the tears begin to form.
Stein turns away from me. He puts the knife down on the table and nearly robotically says, "I'm sorry. I'm not feeling myself lately. Please excuse me." He walks out of the kitchen and I hear the front door open and gently close.
I start crying. Irrational anger. I'm quite sure he's depressed now. But why? And how can I help him? I'm scared, confused, and worried about his senseless outburst. I don't know what to do now. I'm slightly angry for what he's done to the dinner I put a lot of effort into but I know now is not the time to hold grudges. Spirit interrupts my thoughts.
"I'm sorry to leave you with this mess to clean up. But I think it's best I separate you two for the moment. Are you going to be OK by yourself tonight?" Spirit seems to be surprisingly in control of the situation. I shouldn't be surprised really; he is serious when needed.
I stop crying and I give a slight nod of approval. "Do you have a plan?"
He turns his back towards me and starts walking towards the door. "What any man with problems should do," he stops walking for a moment. "I'm going to drown his sorrows with alcohol." And gives me a big thumbs up and mischievous grin over his shoulder.
"Ehhh?" My mouth drops. That doesn't sound good.
