All he could think to himself was that this couldn't be happening. No. Kensi was not supposed to be coming home like this. They were supposed on have a grand ole time, maybe go out with the team for drinks, before headed back to his place for a more...private celebration just for them. And he was supposed to watch her sleep, wondering how on earth he had managed to get so lucky. Instead, he found himself sitting on the couch at OSP, face in his hands, sobbing. He hears Nell's cries mingle with his own, and he was pretty sure Callen and Sam were joining in. Eric too. And he had never hated someone this much since the day he shot his father. But he hated Hetty. And he hated Granger. And if it weren't for the numbness he felt right now, there's no telling what he'd do. Because she was gone. Truly gone.

And her funeral was terrible. Her mom cried just as much as he did, because she lost her baby girl. Even Ray came, to say goodbye to wikipedia. And Granger gave a speech about her being with her father now, but Deeks didn't want her to be with her father. He wanted her to be with him. And when it came his turn to talk about her, it took everything in him to even stand up. He barely go two sentences out before he was crying so hard he couldn't speak. He's pretty sure he started hyperventilating. He saw Sam and Ray start rushing towards him, before everything went black. But he doesn't care. Maybe he'll be joining her.

Then comes the knocking. And it just won't stop. Deeks opens his eyes, and he's in his room. He remembers what happened, and his eyes fill with tears. Or was it just a dream? No, it felt too real. The knocking continues, and he groans. Probably Nell or somebody checking on him. He glances at the clock and realizes it's three o'clock in the morning.

Soon Monty's bark joins the knocking and he finally heads to the door. When he opens it, he begins to question his sanity. But when she falls into his arms, and he breaths in the familiar scent of sunshine and gunpowder, he knows this is real. It was just a dream.

They don't go out for drinks with the team. But they have their private celebration.


A/N: So I couldn't really kill Kensi. My Densi heart would have broke and killed me. Drop me a review on your way out!