Disclaimer: I do not own the characters or settings therein. They are the sole creative property of SquareEnix. I do however own Advent Children and Advent Children Complete (they really are two different movies if you think about it), and Final Fantasy 7 for my PS3. DUDE… IT'S AWESOME IN HD. Err… I digress.
Title: Goddess' Gift to... Mother?
Warnings: complete and utter destruction of the English language… Valley Girl style. (Go watch Clueless) and some OOC-ness
Summary: Minerva is a total Sephy fangirl (like… totally... for sure) but what happens when his mommy complex kicks in?
Dedication: To GenesisCopy for feeding my plot bunny the idea of a sequel to 'Not Quite the Gift of the Goddess'
Canon question: Ok SO! As we know from the repeated scenes, in Crisis Core and in the original game Sephy is thrown into the Reactor by Cloudy with a chance of Emo. But in Final Order, he jumps. So I ask… since both are by Squeenix, which is the holy gospel according to Canon?
Lounging on a brightly colored beach chair the Goddess Minerva or Minnie as her friends called her, was relaxing and letting her toes dangle in her little private pool. Said pool being the Life Stream of course. She was busy chattering away on her cell phone with one of her numerous deity friends when there was a sudden splash in the deep end.
"Ugh! Something just like totally crashed into my pool Sheev. Lemme go see what it is and I'll call you back. Smooches!"
Slipping on her sky-high heels and pushing her insanely oversized sunglasses higher on her nose, the Goddess teetered over to the other side of the pool to see what the disturbance was. New souls were always entering the life stream but never caused a ruckus like this. Leaning over she waved her hands slightly so that the motion would part the glowing green sparkly waves. Her eyes widened in surprise as she saw a heap that was long silver flowing hair and leather. Toeing the lump, she tried to get its attention.
"Ahh… hello? Are you like dead or something? Cuz like if you're not then you should totally not be here yanno."
Sephiroth groaned as the pain from the harsh impact resonated in his bones. Slowly easing up his torso, he looked underneath him and smiled to himself.
"Mother."
"Uhm, excuse me?"
Minerva stepped back slightly as she watched the man rose to his full height. Sephiroth held fast to Jenova's head that was cradled against his chest. Slowly he rose up, keeping his eyes down. He noticed the hot pink toes on the woman that was addressing him. He noticed how to hot pink toes were tucked into painfully high shoes, which were gracing the feet of someone with very shapely legs.
Sephiroth shook his head slightly to clear his thoughts. He needed to focus on his new goal, his birthright. To become a god. No! To be THE GOD to rule the planet and then the cosmos.
Minerva watched as the man stood to his full height in front of her. It took a moment but she recognized him immediately.
"AHMAIGAWD! IT'S YOU! IT'S REALLY IS YOU, isn't it?" She screamed as she started grabbing onto Sephiroth's arms. "You.. you're here," she said with a calculating smile.
The fallen general looked down at the impish looking girl with disdain. He had just realized his true destiny and this… woman was pawing at him. Clutching Jenova's head tightly to him with one hand, he used the other to pry her nails out of his forearm.
"Tch. I don't have time for such drivel. Remove yourself from my presence," he sneered.
Minerva looked crest fallen, she had the hugest crush on Sephiroth for as long as she could remember. It was something her friends teased her about relentlessly. She even had gone as far as posing as a human to try and get his autograph when he did one of his Shin-Ra appearances. Now, he was here in front of her and talking down to her, oh this would not do!
Standing up to her full height of five feet (with heels) Minerva gave Sephiroth her most Goddess like look.
"Do you even know who I am?" she screeched.
"A useless brat who shall kneel before the God that I am," he replied.
Minerva bit back hot tears of anger as she looked the man up and down.
"Hold on real tight to that thing," she sneered as she waved at Jenova. "It's the only head you'll be getting anytime soon."
With that, Minerva snapped her fingers and Sephiroth was sent in pieces to the Northern Crater.
Approximately 7 years later.
"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaangie!"
Angeal Hewely, SOLDIER 1st Class, had called the Life Stream home for the last eight years. He would readily admit that if you had asked him ten years ago if this is where he saw his life, well he might just use his Buster Sword on you. Oh who are we kidding, nothing short of Zack Fair under attack could make the man use that! Anyways, here he was, chilling in the Life Stream with his former protégé, Zack and Zack's favorite gal from the church in the slums, Aerith. He had also met and had become 'friendly' (wink wink nudge nudge) with the very Goddess that Genesis looked to, Minerva.
"Yes, Min?"
"C'mere sweetie and take a looksie at this," she called to the muscular ex-Commander.
Angeal lumbered over to where the Goddess was looking over a ledge that peered down upon Gaia below. He took a seat next to her and pulled the deity into his lap.
"What exactly should I be looking at?"
"Well. Ah, now don't get upset but isn't that the blonde kid that took your sword from Zack a couple of years back?"
Angeal leaned over gently, making sure not to unseat the Goddess. Unconsciously he let out a fierce growl as he saw Cloud entering the Northern Crater.
"Oh crap," Minerva muttered.
"Hm?"
"I dumped Sephiroth there a few years back when he came to the Life Stream. He was so totally mean to me and well I may have thrown a wee temper tantrum…"
Angeal squeezed Minerva closer as he rolled his eyes at her. When they first met she was all temper and improper grammar. Over the last few years though, they seemed to rub off on each other. Angeal wasn't so much a stick in the mud anymore and Minerva had smoothed out those rough edges.
"Wait, Sephiroth was here and you kicked him out?"
"Well you see, I kinda had a crush on him for the longest and he was all about this head he held and it was just weird and mean so I kinda sorta maybe did tear him apart and toss him there," she said so fast that Angeal had to replay the words over a few times in his head before he understood.
Not getting an immediate reaction from Angeal, Minerva quickly added, "This was all before I met you Angie."
"That's ok sweetheart," he chuckled.
"Oh my. Looks like blondie just kicked Sephiroth's ass back to the Life Stream."
Hearing a sickening thud in the distance, Minerva glanced at Angeal before bouncing over to where the humanoid form landed.
"Sephiroth! Glad you could make it. Gonna apologize?"
"Mother…"
Angeal approached and kneeled down close to his old friend, looking up at Minerva he gave her a silent plea and she nodded her assent. Sephiroth would be Angeal's burden here in the Life Stream.
Six months later…
"Gaia! I can't take it!" Angeal shouted as he slammed the bedroom door shut.
"Take what dear?"
"Min, he just doesn't shut up about 'Mother' and how it's all 'Cloud's fault'. Seriously, who blames the weather?"
"You're kidding me right?" she asked.
"What?"
"Cloud is the name of the blonde kid that has your sword. Well, I take that back. He had your sword."
"What do you mean by 'had'?" Angeal said coldly.
"Ahhhhhh. Weeeeeeell.," she said as she turned on the projector that showed live images from Gaia.
"Is that? That's my sword… stuck in the dirt… IS THAT RUST?" Angeal exploded. "I'M GONNA KILL THAT CHOCOBO LOOKING KID!"
"Calm down Angie," Minerva said as she led Angeal to a chair. Suddenly an unholy light shone in her eyes. "I got an idea my love," she murmured as she looped her arms around his neck.
"If it's anything but me kicking that kid's ass, I don't want to hear it!"
"Hear me out. I can't send anyone back from the Life Stream. That's Cetra business but where I interfered with Sephiroth all those years ago, he's my exception to the rule," she said.
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, I can send him back as many times as I want, when I want," She said with a wicked grin.
"Go on…"
"Well, you know I don't like him here," she pouted. "I also know he wants revenge against Cloud and you want Cloud to get pummeled sooo let me send him back."
"Hmm. It's evil," he said as she nodded vigorously. "But my honor…"
"Oh shove your honor Angie. That kid is using your honor as a mile marker on an unnamed dirt highway."
Angeal pondered it for a minute before responding, "How soon can you send him?"
Minerva snapped her fingers and Sephiroth was gone.
Two years later...
Angeal and Minerva were snuggling together on the couch watching the events taking place down in Gaia. They witnessed Cloud being helped by his friends, both living and corporeal. Angeal smiled with delight as he watched Sephiroth stab Cloud over and over and over again. The ex-Commander couldn't be prouder of his former protégé after he gave Cloud that moving motivational speech. They watched closely as Sephiroth succumbed to Omni Slash and disappeared only to be replaced by Kadaj.
Minerva and Angeal moved out of their apartment and into the newly built reception area. Angeal rushed over when he saw Cloud enter the Life Stream, only to be held back by Zack. Ignoring the bellowing man, Minerva moved to where she knew her responsibility would be appearing within moments.
Checking the time on her cell phone, Minerva counted down from 10 waiting for Sephiroth to appear. Right on cue a large lump of black leather and silver hair landed harshly at her feet. Bending over and grasping his chin firmly she forced him to look her in the eyes.
"Aww, you almost had him that time Sephy! Maybe next time," she smirked as she snapped her fingers again.
Sephiroth awoke groaning his mother's name as he looked around to where he landed this time. In a pile of Chocobo, well, you know.
And THAT gentle readers is REALLY the reason why Sephiroth keeps coming back to attack Cloud.
Are you guys sure this is what really happened?
Angeal: Mhm, Shin-Ra honor.
Rufus: Dude, I AM a Shinra and I admit our honor means squat.
Zack: You serious?
Reno: Heehee. Good one Boss.
Sephiroth: Mother?
Cloud: But.. I..
Vincent: At least, I am left alone to contemplate my sins…
Actually Vinny VinVin, you're next. =)
Vincent: Damn.
Genesis: Even if the marrow is barren of bad puns… nothing shall forestall her fanfics.
