Ok
Ok…I decided to redo the first couple of chapters (for grammar and spelling)…because I didn't understand the concept of grammar and spelling when I first wrote this…
DISCLAIMER: I DO own the fire emblem game, but I do NOT own fire emblem characters ect ect. (Though I wish I did...)
"talking"
"thinking"
"mani katti talking"
Lyn was a happy Sacaen plainswoman who wandered around randomly killing bandits with her pet myrmidon, Guy. One day as they were just finishing off some bandits, an ice dragon came out of no where and snatched them up!
"Oh dear!" exclaimed Lyn, "Guy! DO something!"
"Waaaah! I'm scared!" whimpered Guy.
"Oh you are SO worthless!" said Lyn, disgusted.
And so they rode in the claw of the ice dragon for many days, until one day, the dragon suddenly dived down, and… had some fun with some villagers…
"AAAAH! DRAGON! OH DEAR GOD! SAVE US! AAAH! NO! MY HOUSE! AAAAH! MY LEG! IT ATE MY FUCKING LEG! OH JEZUS!" the villagers shouted as the dragon continued razing the village.
"Quick Guy! Now's our chance to escape!" shouted Lyn, dragging Guy away from the crazy dragon. Eventually the dragon got bored and flew away.
"Whew, glad that's over with." Lyn says emerging from the bushes, only to be confronted with a large group of torn and bloodied villagers.
"Whose dragon was that?" asked the village mayor in a quiet voice, with a strange gleam in the back of his eyes.
"Umm…" stammered Lyn, trying to buy time.
"IT'S LYN'S! IT'S ALL HER FAULT! SHE KIDNAPPED ME! OH PLEASE DON'T HURT MEEEE!" wailed Guy from behind Lyn.
"You little backstabbing…" Lyn started, but was stopped by a tremendous cheer from the villagers.
"YOU'VE SLAIN OUR EVIL LORD! HUURAH!" and suddenly little children burst out of the houses and started singing "Ding dong the bad man is dead…"
"I don't think we're in Sacae anymore Guy…" muttered Lyn looking rather frightened.
"Gee, no, yah think?" replied Guy acidly.
"You see," said the mayor, with tears rolling down his cheeks, "We were plagued by a villainous lord who was slowly taxing us to death! But then, like a godsend, your dragon swooped down and sat on him! Oh thank you so much! How can we ever repay you?" gushed the mayor.
"Well…" began Lyn, thinking of all the money they could swindle out of the rejoicing villagers. "We could use some cash…"
"I'll one up you my friend!" exclaimed the mayor with a bright idea, "HEY EVERYONE!" he bellowed, "FROM THIS POINT ON, THIS YOUNG LADY- what did you say your name was miss?"
"Um….Lyn."
"THIS YOUNG LADY, LYN, WILL BE OUR NEW RULER!"
"YAAAAAAAAAAAY!" shouted the crowed.
"Uh…wait! I don't want to be…" stammered Lyn. "AND TO SHOW YOU JUST HOW GRATEFUL WE ARE, WE WILL GIVE YOU OUR SACRED SWORD, THE MANI KATTI, AND 10,000 GOLD!"
"On second thought, I think I will take up that offer…" said Lyn, eyes shinning. "Ten thousand gold…ten thousand gold…" the number just kept repeating in her mind.
"BRING OUT THE SWORD!" bellowed the mayor, now quite drunk. An old priest came forward with a shinning blade.
"This is the Mani Katti, our sacred sword, handed down…"
"Yeah, yeah, tell it to someone who cares!" muttered Lyn as she excitedly grabbed the sword. "Oooh! So shiny!"
"And I'll get shinier if you feed me some souls, babe." Said a disembodied voice.
"Oh! And you can talk too? How exciting!" squealed Lyn.
"SHUT UP AND FEED ME!" thundered the blade.
"Yes, well, alright…" she swung around to find a likely victim…only her sword kinda…accidentally…sliced off Guy's head… (a/n I really don't mean to bash on Guy so much…I like him, I do…its just…this kind of thing happens in the game for me…I've never actually seen Guy survive past like…10 levels after I get him)
"Oooh…that was good…" murmured the sword as it ate Guys soul. Lyn stared in amazement. The sword actually did get shinier after eating a soul!
"Of course you'll have to go to Ostia in order to get actual rights to this province…" the mayor blathered on, not noticing the demented gleam in Lyn's eyes.
"This Ostia…there are people there? Many of them?" asked Lyn eagerly.
"Why, of course my dear child! It's the most populated country in the world!" (a/n is it a country? City? Province? Whatever you know?)
"Ahahaha…Excellent…" murmured Lyn, now fully possessed by the blade.
"HEY! I AM NOT!" shouted Lyn in protest.
"She's right, you know, I didn't posses her…but I took a ventriloquist class in demonic swords school and I thought I'd have a little fun…" explained the sword.
"Um…who are you two talking to?" asked the mayor, just realizing that they weren't paying attention to him.
"Umm…"
"Umm…"
"Hey sword."
"The name is Mani Katti, or any combination of the aforementioned name, not sword…and yes?"
"Wanna go on a mad killing spree before we leave?"
"Sure…I'm always ready for more soulsss…."
"But first…excuse me Mr. Mayor Sir, but…just how do I get to Ostia?" inquired Lyn.
"Oh it's easy! Just follow the Yellow Brick Road!" exclaimed the mayor jovially. "Excuse me?"
"I said, follow the yellow road…" repeated the mayor, looking concerned, "Is there something wrong with your hearing dear?"
"SOULS!"
"Aaaahhh!"
SLICE CHOP SLICE SLASH CRITICAL HIT!
After completely annihilating the village and all the farms around it, Lyn and her new shiny blade headed off down the road, humming a cheerful tune…a cheerful tune of DEATH! DUN DUN DUUUUN!"
Guy: why did you kill me? sniff...
Me: there, there... (pats on back)
