Title Secrets of the Snow
Rating T
Disclaimer Don't own, not making a profit and I never will *crosses heart*

flashback
'thoughts'
"dialogue"

Secrets of the Snow Pt. 1

Hinata's favorite memory with her cousin always takes place in the snow.

"Neji-nii-chan! Come outside please! It's snowing!"

When she closes her eyes, she can still feel the feathery coldness melting into her snowboots and the frosty wind biting her cheeks and nose as she ran as fast as she could through the snowdrifts that would lead her to her cousin's house.

"Neji-nii-chan! Wake up! There's snow!"

She remembers that there was something different about the snow that day. Something magical and happy, like it had fallen just for her. It sparkled and crunched beneath her purple boots and she almost slipped making her way up the steps to Neji's house.

"Neji-nii-chan!"

And before her hand could knock on his door, it opened.

"Hinata?"

"Father!" the nineteen-year-old quickly bowed her head before the patriarch of the clan. "Good evening, father."

"You should be in bed. You have your first jounin mission tomorrow."

"Yes, I know, father." She raised her head and looked into his eyes. "I would just like to speak with Neji-nii-san about something before I go to sleep."

Hiashi's eyes glimmered curiously at her in the moonlight, before he turned his gaze toward the Hyuuga garden.

"That's fine then." He pulled his yukata closer around him and moved his cane forward to take a step. "Just make sure you're in bed before it snows tonight."

"Yes, father."

Hiashi made an approving grunt and moved away from the door to let Hinata through. Once he had entered the main house, she glanced inside the candlelit room where her cousin was, and quickly lost her nerve.

"Hinata-sama."

Her cousin stood in the doorway of his home still in his sleeping clothes. The smell of freshly brewed coffee wafted from inside.

"Why are you awake now? Are you ready to train?"

"No! It's snowing!"

Neji's tired gaze fell from his cousin, to the white fluff on the ground, then back to her.

"So?" he yawned and rubbed the sleep from his eyes.

"Come out here with me!" she tugged on his arm unexpectedly and his eyes widened from the sudden temperature change.

"Hi-Hinata-sama!" he pulled his arm away from her grasp and scurried back into the warmth. "I'm not even dressed yet!"

"Please get dressed then. I can wait."

'All right, c'mon Hinata. You're 19 now and this is no time to be a coward. You're a jounin and you need to face this like a mission. Execute with perfection and don't hesitate.'

With false bravado, she stepped into the room, and quickly shut the door behind her. After slipping off her shoes she stood silent for a moment.

Had he noticed her yet?

Of course he had. He'd been a jounin for 4 years longer than she had. He had always been the prodigy.

She tilted her head up to find the handsome brunette in the corner of the room in his usual meditative position. The musky scent of incense and burning oil filled the air and gave the room the room an almost ethereal glow.

He didn't say anything, but she knew that he knew she was there, and so she dared another step forward.

"Hinata-sama." Her name was a statement, rolling smooth and calm off his tongue to echo in the tiny space, and shake her resolve. Trying to look unaffected, she looked up to meet his gaze, which was narrowed at her and more intense than the Sharingan.

She was annoying him with her presence. She decided that she'd better do what she came here to do, but before she could utter a syllable, he spoke again.

"You're drunk."

She paused, stunned at the accusation.

"No! W-well, not drunk but…I only had a l-little sake with Sakura-chan after the briefing…"

He quirked a brow, genuinely curious as to why his cousin decided to interrupt his meditation while…uncharacteristically buzzed.

When she felt her cousin's eyes reading her like an open book, she shifted her position and cleared her throat. Walking briskly to sit in front of her cousin, she finally decided to put on her shinobi face. It was now or never.

"I just thought that you'd like to know that Hokage-sama promoted me to jounin while you were on your mission."

"Congratulations." He said pointedly, closing his eyes once more.

"And I have my first mission tomorrow." She pulled a bottle of sake and two small cups from her white kimono.

"You'll do fine." Was the stoic reply, his inexpressiveness never wavering.

And he quickly returned to her in his navy blue coat, blue hat, matching scarf, boots, and mittens.

They looked at one another before he said, "Hinata-sama! Where is your scarf and hat…and mittens?"

"Oh!" she started, suddenly noticing her state of undress. "I…I guess I forgot them."

He sighed and shook his head. Hinata watched curiously as her cousin went back into his room and came out with a scarf and mittens for her.

"Here." He wrapped the scarf tightly around his little cousin and smiled. "You'll get sick, Hinata-sama."

She remembers that he smiled a genuine smile that day. She felt warm and smiled back; knowing at that from that moment on she could always trust Neji to protect her.

"C'mon. I thought you wanted to show me the snow?"

"Yes!" she practically squealed and grabbed Neji's arm as he escorted her outside into the winter wonderland.

"What was your first jounin mission like, Neji-nii-chan?"

He halfway opened his eyes at the sudden colloquial use of his name. He then opened them all the way, studying his younger cousin as she began to pour the sake.

"You shouldn't get drunk the night before a mission. You haven't drank before and if you start tonight it will only weaken your ability to focus and thus leave you susceptible to an enemy's attack, not to mention risk the mission."

"I know." Was her meager response as she popped the cork back in the sake and pushed Neji's cup toward him. "And I have drank before, but you didn't answer my question." Her bejeweled eyes gazed up at him expectantly.

Neji didn't even glance down at his cup. She knew that he disapproved of alcohol, but he knew that she disapproved of it as well. So what was she doing? It wasn't like her to just walk in in the middle of he night and offer him alcohol right before she had a mission the next day. It wasn't even like her to interrupt him at all! This certainly wasn't Hinata, but it wasn't a clone either...or an illusion...so what had gotten into her?

His hand reached out and grabbed her wrist before she could put her filled cup to her mouth.

"Hinata-sama. What are you doing?" His narrowed eyes thwarted her like kunai.

"I just wanted to talk with you Neji-nii-cha-"

"No!" he said sternly, jolting her out of her act so forcefully that she dropped her cup. "This isn't like you, Hinata-sama. Please, explain to me what's going on."

Her lavender gaze fell to the floor, ashamed and embarrassed at her folly.

After a few minutes of silence, he released her wrist and pushed the sake aside. He entwined his arms across his chest and stared at Hinata for a few beats, waiting for a response.

After there was none, he closed his eyes.

"If you need advice on one of those missions, then perhaps you'd be better off talking to Sakura-san or Tenten-san. I am of no aid in that area."

There was still silence, and then he heard a quiet whimpering. He opened his eyes once more to find the younger girl hunched in front of him, sobbing.

"Hinata-sama?"

"N-Neji! Neji-nii-san!" she threw herself onto him, completely shaken and distraught. Neji was suddenly taken off guard and her tackle had pushed him onto the wall.
"Hinata-sama?!"

"Don't make me go, nii-chan! P-p-p-please! I….I hate it!!! It's not easy…no matter what they say…."

Neji stayed quiet in stunned silence as his younger cousin grabbed hold of his yukata and held it to her face. He had no idea what to do. One minute she was trying to…well he had no idea what she was trying to do a minute ago, but then she suddenly changed into a sobbing mess.

Perhaps it was that time of the month for her? In that case the sake had only acerbated her situation.

"Hinata-sama," he patted her head reassuringly. "Perhaps you just need to go to sleep. This is obviously your first time drinking sake, and its effects on you are more than you can handle right now. Sleep it off and you'll be fine in the morning." He tried to pull her out of his yukata, but she held tightly.

"No! You! Y-y-y-you have to go talk to the Hokage! Get someone else! H-help me, nii-chan!"

She sounded so desperate.

"Hinata-sama, if you keep throwing those snowballs at me, I won't be able to finish our snowman."

"Quit building him then!" she fired another snowball and it landed pathetically in front of him, "Play with me, Neji-nii-chan!"

Neji just shook his head and turned his back to her, continuing to roll the ball for the midsection of the snowman. Big mistake.

"Neji-nii-chan!"

Before he knew what hit him, Neji fell into the snow, incidentally crashing face-first into the huge packed ball of snow that he had worked so hard to roll.

His assailant sat on his backside, giggling and poking him.

"N-Neji-nii-chan? Are you okAAAAAY?!!"

Neji had swiftly flipped her over and pinned her in the snow.

"This means war." He said rather seriously, some snow still clinging to his tan face.

"War? Why war? I just wanted to…"

After dusting the snow off, he stood up off of her and trudged behind the tree.

"I hope that your training with Hiashi-oji-sama is paying off!"

Butterflies swirled in her tummy excitedly as she sat up prepared to fend off the expected assault from her playmate.

Finally!

She just hoped that this didn't turn into another one of his infamous training sessions.

"Hinata-sama!" he said as firm as he could, straightening Hinata in front of him. "You must calm yourself. This is no way for a shinobi of your caliber to behave."

"I know." She murmured tears still glossy in her puffy red eyes. Black tear streaks marred her face as well, and he chanced a look at his yukata. It was a good thing it was black too, he supposed.

"Now, what is it? What could be so bad? You've been on an assassination mission before, haven't you?"

Sniffling, she nodded her head.

"Is that what kind of mission you have?"

She nodded again.

He sighed in exasperation.

"Hinata-sama, those missions are ridiculously easy. You just need to separate yourself from the victim, don't bond with them. Don't make a connection. He's the mission, nothing more, nothing less."

Hinata said nothing, just pulled a cloth from her kimono and started cleaning the spilt sake from the floor. It was a beautiful kimono, he noted. Pure white with gold trim and a golden phoenix that was wrapping around her body. It greatly accentuated the porcelain glow of her skin and the deep ebony blue in her long hair.
For some reason, though, she wore the kimono around her shoulders, the obi barely tied around the back. The front fell open to reveal just enough of voluptuous features, though Neji would never admit that aloud to a soul.

Why was she wearing it now? Hadn't that kimono been a present from her mother? A present to wear for her…her wedding, wasn't it?

Suddenly, it dawned upon him, and his eyes widened.

The sake, the kimono, the light hints of make-up on her face that, combined with the incense and candlelight, was an ideal romantic setting. The perfect place for an innocent young girl to succumb to the charms of a man.

She was trying to seduce him.

"It's not just an assassination mission, is it Hinata?" his tone leveled, but became less serious as he tried to look in her eyes.

Briefly, her soft eyes met his in an apologetic look. She was like an open book to him.

Her eyes watered in shame.

'Dammit, why do I have to be so weak?!'

She couldn't fight down the tears that burned in her eyes and brought the sleeve of her kimono up to wipe them away, but he caught her wrist before she could make it there.

His eyes met hers for a brief minute, and she saw an understanding look that she hadn't seen for quite some time looking back at her.

"You'll soil your kimono." He said softly before pulling out a cloth from his yukata and handing it to her.

"Thank you, Neji-nii-san."

"Hyuuga Hinata!"

A stern, familiar voice caught the two snow-covered tots off guard mid-snowball fight.

"Father?" Neji stuttered as they watched the angered, half-awake man stomp over to them.

"Hinata! Where is your hat?! You're mother would have a fit if she saw you now!" Hizashi demanded as his tiny niece bounced up to him and clung to his leg.

"Sorry, Hizashi-oji-sama! I just…I just wanted to play in the snow!"

"No!"

Both uncle and niece stopped to look over at the young boy who had interrupted them.

"It was my fault, father" Neji walked toward the pair and knelt his head reverently."I…I came and woke Hinata-sama up. I was anxious to be out here, so I hurried her and she didn't finish dressing. It…It was my fault. Forgive me."

They both stared at him for awhile, Hizashi giving his son a disbelieving glare. He then crossed his arms over his chest then turned his gaze toward his niece, who was looking down in contrition as well.

"Is he telling the truth, Hinata-chan?" he asked after a few minutes.

The tot glanced at Neji, but the boy never turned his gaze away from the ground.

"No, Hizashi-oji-sama. He didn't come to me, I went to him. I came outside without dressing properly and woke nii-san up. Neji is just lying to protect me." In an act of appreciation, the tot reached out and grabbed Neji's gloved hand, which was wet and cold on her skin, but she didn't care. He gasped and turned to her, and she smiled warmly.

Hinata then stood up, still holding her cousin's hand, and bravely looked up at her uncle. "Don't punish Neji, Hizashi-oji-sama. I just wanted to play in the snow. I even came without a scarf, but nii-san took one from the closet and gave it to me before we came out here."

Hizashi stood silent for a few moments before smiling and shaking his head at the pair.

"Get into the house, you two, and put on some dry clothes. If I catch either of you out here again without being properly dressed, I'll make you clean up the Hyuuga stables for two weeks!"

"Yes father!"
"Yes, oji-sama! Thank you!"

"Hinata," he started. "Perhaps…perhaps you should go talk with Sakura-san or Tenten-san about this "information gathering"/assassination mission. I know that they've done this kind of thing before and it might be easier if…"

"No! It's not that."

Her face was still slightly smeared with mascara as she started to gather the sake cups. He noticed that she still fought back tears, but fervently held back to talk to him.

"I…I wanted…to….p-practice." She admitted quietly a flush rushing to her cheeks.

"Practice?" he said, taken aback. "On me?!" his face turned a bright crimson and he coughed to hide his embarrassment. "Hinata-sama, surely there are other shinobi…"

"No! I…I'm a virgin and I… and there's no one that I trust more than you."

"Still! We can't just…That kind of trust is…I mean I can't…" for the first time in her life, Hinata had Neji stumbling over his words.

"I know, and…I'm sorry."

The bitter wind blew outside, and shook the windowpanes.

"I'll…go now."

She slowly stood up, tucking the items back into her kimono and Neji watched her go.

"Be careful, Hinata." He said quietly. "What you ask for is…forbidden by shinobi law."

Her hand shook as she reached for the door handle.

"I know, I just…I just don't want to lose my innocence to a man who deserves nothing more than to have his…genitals removed." She added the last part with venom and clenched her hands into fists.

Neji closed his eyes thoughtfully.

"Who is the assignment?"

"The son of the daimyo of the Land of the Tiger."

'An A-class assignment.' He thought. 'Hokage-sama must be giving all the new jounin a trial by fire.'

There was nothing more he could say. He didn't know what to say. He had never been in that sort of situation before and frankly didn't know how to handle it. Mission and tactical advice he could handle, but on delicate and emotional matters…he left that up to women. It was none of his concern.

But Hinata…was his cousin. His precious person. The one whom he vowed to protect. If anyone could pull his heartstrings, it would be her. But to what cost would he protect her? He was her relative…her cousin…it would be wrong for him to just protect her that way…wouldn't it?

But he couldn't just let this tyrant…invade and scar his young cousin, could he? No, of course not! Over his dead body!

'Get hold of yourself, Neji! She's nineteen and a shinobi. It's her duty to perform this. She has to, there's nothing you can do to change that. She either needs to sober up and do it or…quit being a shinobi.'

But no matter how hard he concentrated; he couldn't help that his thoughts kept floating back to Hinata's mission.

And he felt like a hypocrite.