Chapter 1.

He didn't really know what was going on with him lately. It had started quite suddenly one day, and he hadn't really thought much about it. He had just taken a few pain killers and pretended that it wasn't there and had gone on with the day. It worked that day, at least for a while. But later that day the head ache returned, he remembered because he and McGee had made plans to go to a bar, but he had to decline because the thought of spending a few hours in a bar was not appealing at all.

Over the next few days the headache came and went. He didn't think it was a normal headache. Mostly when he got them it was pressure around his forehead, this one was more centered in the back of his skull.

At first the pain killers had helped, and the headache disappeared for the day, or it came back later at night. But then he just went to bed and it was gone when he woke up. However he started to get annoyed with it now. What was going on? Was it really normal to have this many headaches he asked himself.

"Tony? Are you okay?" Ziva asked him, one afternoon when he had one of them. He considered ignoring her. He wasn't okay, he was out of pain killers! He really thought that he had packed them this morning, but no matter how much he searched his bag he couldn't find them.

"What?" He said instead.

"It looks like you are just sitting there. We have a case if you hadn't noticed and Gibbs will be back any minute and will yell at us if we have nothing."

"So you are saying that you have nothing?" He retorted.

"No, I'm saying you are not working."

"You don't know what you are taking about." He snapped back, and saw that she got annoyed with him then. He just didn't like what she was insinuating. But he knew that the real reason he snapped at her was because she was right. He didn't have anything, except a headache. She was right, Gibbs would be pissed. He had probably noticed by now that Tony didn't really contribute that much lately. It was just a bit hard to concentrate when it felt like your head was getting screwed into.

"You are not even listening to me are you?"

"What, Ziva?"

"You were staring out in the space."

"Not the."

"What?"

"Not the space."

"Where were you staring then?"

He groaned and buried his face in his hand dramatically. He did it for the show, but secretly it was well needed. "Whatever." He just didn't care to explain.

"Fine, be grumpy. I actually have something."

"Yeah, what?" He forced himself to look up again.

"I'm not telling you, so you can say it and make me look like a fool when Gibbs gets here."

"Whatever." He repeated and looked his eyes on the computer to avoid having to talk to her any longer. He left him alone.

Staring at a computer screen did not help his headache. What he wanted to do was bury his head in his pillows in his dark bedroom. Something that was still hours away. They needed to find a lead before they could leave, before Gibbs would let them leave.

He needed to find something before Gibbs got back from the witness with McGee. He hadn't found anything so far. At least Ziva had something. That was good.

The headache didn't ease up at all, and he wished he could just go home when McGee and Gibbs finally got back.

They started to go through the case and Tony remained where he was at his desk opposed to getting up and standing in front of the screen as he normally did.

"DiNozzo?" He had to react. He had been just sitting there listening to the others so far, but now Gibbs wanted to know what he had. Which was nothing. They were all staring at him when he looked up.

"Eh…" he didn't get further than that.

"DiNozzo! What do you got?!"

"I…eh…I was looking after…" what had he been looking after really? Think, think, think. Shit! It was blank. Totally blank. What to do? He had to cover this up.

"Ziva have something." he said eventually.

"Yes, DiNozzo. We know that." They were still staring at him. McGee looked a bit amused, Ziva actually looked a bit concerned and Gibbs had a weird look on his face, like he was assessing Tony and deciding whether he should let it go or not. He did. And Tony could relax a tiny bit. At least for now. He had gotten away with it this time.

Gibbs let them leave pretty early that night. And Tony left without talking to the others. He had other things to attend to. Like getting pain killers. He actually stopped on his way home to get some, he opened the package in the store and dry swallowed two before he went to pay. When he got home he didn't bother to have dinner, he just crashed on his bed. He just laid there and felt his head pulsating with pain. It eased up after some time, and he was able to sleep.

The next day was a bit better, at least until the afternoon. The headache actually came just after lunch, and the pill he took didn't help much, it was still there. It made him feel annoyed and tired. He wished it would just go away. What had he done to deserve this?

He also wished that McGee and Ziva would shut up. They were arguing about something stupid across the bullpen.

"Would you just shut up?" He eventually snapped at them, getting their surprised faces to turn against him.

"What's your problem Tony?" McGee asked him.

"You are." He grunted and tried to focus on his computer screen.

"We were just discussing the case Tony, you know, doing our jobs."

"What is that supposed to mean?"

She looked at him for a while, but then instead of insult him like he expected she just shook her head a bit and got up and went over to McGee and leaned against the wall next to his desk, ignoring Tony. It was just as good. He couldn't stand their loud voices. It was like they tripled in volume in his head. Maybe he should go and see Ducky?

"Grab your gear. We are heading back to the base." Gibbs came storming in to the bullpen from god knows where. Tony groaned inwardly. He couldn't go to any base. He wanted to crawl into a dark hole and stay there until his damn headache passed, not be in a car with Gibbs behind the wheel. He needed to come up with a way to get out of it. However his brain was refusing to function in the way he wanted it. He couldn't come up with anything. He just remained behind his desk, and saw the others get all the way over to the elevator before they realized that he wasn't with them.

"Tony? You coming?" McGee called.

"No." he said, and if he hadn't had the headache he would have laughed at McGee's expression.

"Where is he?" he could hear Gibbs asking from inside the elevator.

"Eh…He said he's not coming." McGee said.

"What?!" he heard Gibbs slap the button preventing the elevator from closing, and he came back towards Tony. Ziva and McGee following behind him.

"DiNozzo! What the hell are you doing?"

"I'm staying here boss, I have some things to go through." He said lamely, hoping Gibbs wouldn't ask him what that was.

"No you are not. I need you with us. Now."

"No, boss I can't." he insisted. He wasn't going to come no matter what Gibbs said. At this point the headache was so bad, that he didn't trust himself to have their backs in the field. He couldn't go.

"I have something I have to do." He lied. Or well, he did. Go to Abby's lab and lay down. He stood up to not feel at such a disadvantage where Gibbs was in front of him.

"DiNozzo." Gibbs growled threateningly, but he ignored him and went to pass his boss. Just as he did, in the corner of his eyes he could see Gibbs raise his hand to give him a head slap. Quickly he ducked out of the way, just as Gibbs swung his hand, the movement almost made him lose his balance, but he regained it and stared into Gibbs eyes.

"No." Tony said coldly, brushed pass Gibbs and headed towards Abby's lab leaving his shocked coworkers behind.

"Boss?" he could hear McGee ask.

"Leave him. Let's go."

And with that they were gone. He stopped for a while leaning his forehead against the wall. What the hell was going on with him? He could have handled that so much better. The way Gibbs had just looked at him.

Maybe he should have just told them the truth. Why didn't he do that?

Because he was a bit embarrassed. That's why. He just had a headache. He should be able to work through that. But as it was now, he just couldn't he needed to sleep.

Abby immediately shut her music off when he told her he had a headache and was thinking about getting some rest in her lab.

"Of course, Tony, go ahead. Do you need something? Can I get you a blanket?"

He declined and she did it anyway, draping it over him, he just let her. Too grateful to be laying down to argue about it with her. She turned off the lights as well, so that the lab got a bit darker, only lit up by the daylight from the windows and her computer screen. It felt a bit better to be laying down. Maybe it would pass if he just got some sleep.

- NCIS -

"What was up with Tony?" McGee asked from the backseat of the car. "He have been pissed all day."

"Yeah? Why?" Gibbs asked. He had noticed the same thing as the younger agent, but had no idea why Tony was acting like he was.

"I have no idea."

"He was yelling at us to shut up earlier." Ziva helped out.

"Maybe he is hang over?" McGee suggested. "He get's like that then."

"I don't think he went out yesterday. Maybe…" Ziva said.

"So you have no idea?" Gibbs interrupted her. Turned out they didn't.

In fact Gibbs thought that Tony had been acting a bit off for some time now. What was up with him really? When he thought about it, he couldn't come up with a single reason for Tony's strange behavior.

Tony had never refused to go with him into the field, it was the opposite really. Tony loved the field work more than any other agent he had ever known, which was why this was so out of character for him. Another thing that struck him was the way Tony ducked away from his head slap. He had thought that Tony had needed one of those from straight out refusing to come with them without a valid reason. But Tony hadn't let him. Probably the first time for that as well. It made Gibbs feel uneasy. It had also put him out of balance for a moment, as Tony had told him no. No, was all he had said and then just walked away. The more he thought about it the more worried did he get. Was something wrong with his senior agent that he had missed to take notice of? Had something happened to him that made him not want to go out into the field?

They made a short case of getting to the base, questioning the sailor they needed and headed back, all in less than two hours. It hadn't really lead anywhere, which was annoying.

When they got to the bullpen Tony wasn't at his desk. When they all noticed that, both McGee and Ziva looked at him as if he knew where Tony was. He just dropped his bag by his desk and left to find his agent and get to the bottom with this.

The first stop he made was with Ducky, but he hadn't seen Tony. When he started to tell a story about once in Scotland when his friend went missing Gibbs excused himself and left. At his next stop he found Tony.

He was sleeping soundly under a blanket on Abby's floor. She didn't notice him coming since she had her headphones on, probably as to not disturb the sleeping man next to her.

So this was the important thing that Tony needed to do. Sleep on the job? He felt annoyance slowly raise in his chest. He had actually been worried about the man. He walked over and stopped at Tony's feet.

"DiNozzo!" He barked making both Abby and Tony jump. Tony drunkenly sat up and Abby turned against him removing her headphones.

"Gibbs, what a pleasant surprise." She smiled at him.

"No, I don't think so. Get up DiNozzo! Now." Tony was just sitting there staring straight ahead.

"Gibbs, calm down. He just woke up."

"He is not supposed to sleep on the job Abby." He wasn't going to let her defend him.

"Now, DiNozzo." He said to his agent and left expecting Tony to follow him.

He did, but a few minutes later. Minutes that Gibbs spent getting more annoyed with him. Tony was moving stiffly, and sat down at his desk, but didn't do anything else. He just sat there looking down on his keypad. He didn't met any of their gazes, Ziva and McGee was staring at him as well. It made Gibbs even more annoyed and he really wanted to scream some at Tony, but he was a bit reluctant to do it in front of his other agents. Tony would not appreciate it at all. Not that it was his call to make anyway. However before he had decided how to react to the situation Ziva beat him to it.

"So what was it that you had to do here Tony?" She asked.

She got no reaction. He ignored her in favor of staring at nothing.

"Tony?" McGee asked. He looked up then.

"What?" He asked flatly.

"Why did you have to stay behind? Did you find something?"

"Eh…no." He didn't elaborate, and just looked down again. Gibbs shook his head in annoyance.

"You better found something before you leave here tonight." He ordered loudly and thought for a second that he saw Tony flinch and his eyes fluttered shut for a second or two.

"DiNozzo!" he barked and got a quiet "Yeah boss" back.

They worked in silence after that. Gibbs did his best to ignore his agents. They didn't have anything on the case yet, and it was frustrating, and on top of that, his best agent had decided to screw them and not offer any help at all.

It had probably been two or three hours when he noticed that Ziva got up from her chair and walked over to Tony's desk. To his surprise she went behind Tony's desk and got up right in his face.

"Are you okay Tony?" he could hear her quietly ask. He watched them, and saw that Tony froze in his seat. Ziva just waited. Eventually he shook his head once to the side indicating no.

"I have a headache." He said and she nodded.

"Have you taken something for it?" She asked and he nodded. She then looked at his screen and then over at Gibbs and met his eyes. She looked concerned.

She straightened up then, "Maybe we should all head home," she said. "We are not getting anywhere with this anyway tonight."

Gibbs immediately knew that she was trying to cover for Tony, he liked how loyal she was to him. But only a headache? That didn't let Tony of the hook. He saw that Ziva glanced back down on Tony's screen, and he wanted to know what it was about.

Ziva actually tried to block his path when he came around to look for himself, but he maneuvered his way back. What he saw was nothing. Tony had nothing on his screen, just the desktop was opened. Had he seriously been sitting there staring at nothing the whole time?

It made him even more annoyed then he had been before.

"You know what?" He said as he walked back to his desk. "Ziva and McGee go home. DiNozzo is going to stay here until I say so."

"Gibbs…" Ziva said.

"Boss..." Tony said in a strained voice. "I'll find something tomorrow." He said.

"No, you won't. I expect a lead on my desk tomorrow morning." He left without looking back.

- NCIS -

He really couldn't focus. After Gibbs left, Ziva and McGee both at looked at him with pity and he couldn't take that. He told them to leave. He didn't want them looking at him like that. He didn't need that.

"Just go."

"But Tony, we can help." she had said.

"I don't need your help." He snapped, and she changed, like he knew she would. He wasn't really being fair now when she offered to help him out. And he kind of knew that he needed the help. With his head pulsating like crazy he couldn't think, couldn't form coherent thought long enough to get any work done. He sure had tried.

Gibbs was pissed at him. Really pissed. It was his own fault. He knew that, but it still got to him. He hated it when he wasn't getting along with Gibbs.

This headache wasn't normal though. He didn't think he ever had one this bad, at least not this persistent. He rested his head in his hands and groaned. Screw this, he thought. He would deal with Gibbs wrath tomorrow.

He took a cab home, because he didn't trust himself to drive. By the time he got home the headache actually had eased up a little and he had dinner before he went to bed.

He was actually surprised when he woke up the next morning and the headache was gone. He felt almost normal. Just a bit more tired than usual. He decided to go straight to the office and see if he could find a lead on the case to make up for yesterday. Sure, Gibbs was still going to be pissed, but at least now he felt up to defending himself. He guessed he could just say that he had had a really bad headache, he was pretty sure Gibbs would accept it.

It had been so bad yesterday. All he had been able to do was just sit there. Hopefully that had passed now. However he had a feeling it hadn't.

Gibbs was already at the office when he got there. He pretended everything was okay and greeted his boss as he normally did. Gibbs just glared at him.

He went up and stood next to Gibbs desk.

"Boss, about yesterday…" he started.

"Did you find something?" Gibbs interrupted him, and he felt annoyance at his boss creep up inside him.

"No I didn't Gibbs. I had a headache yesterday."

"So?"

"I…" he started, but then stopped himself. Gibbs clearly wasn't interested in his excuses anyway. "I'll find something." He said and went back to his desk without saying anything else.

Ziva and McGee must have sensed the tension in the air when they arrived because they stopped talking and quietly got to work. It was unusual for them to be so stuck in a case and it made all of them frustrated, especially Gibbs, who growled at them and even Abby couldn't cheer him up. Gibbs barely talked to Tony, barely looked at him. Tony knew that it was expected, but he still thought it was a bit unfair. At least Gibbs snapped at McGee as well, when he spoke computer instead of English.

The headache came from nowhere. He was bending down to pick up a paper he dropped on the floor and when he got upright again it was there. It was so sudden that it made him dizzy. It hurt everywhere. He discreetly massaged his scalp to relieve some of the pressure, but it didn't help. He fumbled in his drawer for the box of pills he had stashed there, found it and dry swallowed two once more, in lack of anything to drink. Coffee wasn't such a good thing to mix with pills.

After that the waiting began. The wait for the headache to ease up. He found that if he sat as still as possible it was better. Preferable he would like to lay down, but that didn't work here in the bullpen. No one had noticed that he was in trouble yet. That was good.

He couldn't go on like this. It had only been ten minutes. He would have to go to a doctor and get checked out. This wasn't normal. He could barely function, it was a wonder that he managed to sit upright in his chair. What he didn't know then was that the whole thing would come to an end in less than thirty minutes. With the help of Gibbs, if you could call it help, he wasn't sure.

They were talking, his colleagues. He should really listen what they were saying. McGee was talking now, Tony tried to focus on him. It was hard. Was he blurry? They were walking over the the screen to go over the case now.

"DiNozzo, get over here now. I'm not going to tell you again." Gibbs was telling him. Again? He had missed that. He should stand. Or lay down? No, stand up. That was what he was about to do. He did so eventually and walked towards the others. They were all looking at him. He forced himself to smile. He failed at acting as if he was okay, because Ziva whispered a question on whether he was or not. He didn't answer her. "Fine, then. Keep ignoring me." She hissed in his ear.

"I'm not ignoring you" he whispered back, leaning closer to her. He suddenly started to list more to his side then he wanted to and ended up pushing against her.

"What are you doing?" Ziva exclaimed. Obviously thinking he had done it on purpose.

"Shut it, you two." Gibbs told them. "McGee you start." McGee did, and Tony tried to follow. He just couldn't. He could barely make out that it was words connected to form sentences. It was all pretty scary. Should he go to Ducky? It hurt so much.

Oh shit! Where they talking to him now? He was pretty sure that McGee had asked him something? What had it been?

"Eh…" Was all he said. It happened all so suddenly after that.

He hadn't noticed that Gibbs was monitoring him, if he had noticed he would have known that Gibbs was aware of that he wasn't listening at all. For Tony the head slap came from nowhere. It all happened in a few seconds time, but to him it felt like forever. His head exploded from behind with the slap, and it was as if the force of it travelled record speed through his body. It was a hard head slap that was one of the thoughts that passed through his brain for less than a second. The next thing he knew was that he was falling. He couldn't control his legs even though he tried, they just folded below him as he ascended to the floor, face first. He smacked his chin and forehead against the floor, and it felt like his whole head was on fire. The pain so intense. It was crazy. He thought that he moaned. Embarrassing floated through his head as well. He was face down on the floor after a head slap. He would never live this through, McGee and Ziva would taunt him forever. But he just laid there. He couldn't, wouldn't do anything else. Not with his head like this. It wasn't worth it.

Ziva was calling his name the next thing he knew. He didn't know if he had blacked out for a second, but she was asking how he was.

"Tony? How are you? Are you okay?"

"DiNozzo? Answer her." Came Gibbs' voice. He was still in the same position, his head resting sideways across the bullpen floor. He should get up. He started to turn on his back, and felt hands helping him to do so. However, the pain in his head got even worse when he was on his back, and he felt himself shaking uncontrollable for a moment, as he opened his mouth to scream. Nothing came out though.

Then suddenly everything came rushing back, and he was aware again. He was on the floor in the middle of the bullpen with Gibbs, Ziva and McGee looking down on him.

"Tony? Are you okay?" McGee said.

"Yeah." He breathed out. "I'm fine. I just wasn't prepared, that's all." He smirked up at them, and could immediately see them relax some. That was good. He didn't want them to worry.

"Get off the floor then." Gibbs said harshly and turned away from him, looking back at the plasma. Tony wasn't prepared for that. Wasn't Gibbs worried? It was his fault he ended up here. He wanted to get up and confront him. Now.

"Maybe you should rest a bit." McGee suggested when he tried to get up.

"McWorry, I'm fine." He tried to sound like himself. It didn't work. McGee did not looked convinced. Then he noticed that the reason he couldn't get up was because Ziva was holding him down.

"Let go." He told her.

"No, you should not get up. I think we should call an ambulance." She said.

"No, no, no. I don't need that." He tried. "I'm fine."

"Gibbs!" Ziva said

"You heard him. Get him up and out of here. I don't need to see him anymore."

That was harsh. He didn't want to see him anymore. Gibbs didn't want to see him. He was unwanted here. He needed to get up. Ziva was no longer holding him, but she was still next to him.

He didn't get far. As soon as he lifted his head in a semi upright position his head exploded again, and he was pretty sure that he screamed this time, but it was out of reflex. It was so painful, like someone was drilling with multiple drills into his head. His whole body tensed. Everything became blurry. Ziva was screaming at him.

"Tony! Tony! What's happening? Tony talk to me? What is happening?"

Other voices. McGee. "I'm calling an ambulance and Ducky." He was saying. Tony couldn't protest. What was happening? He wanted it to stop! His head was splitting in half, or thirds or fourths. He needed it to stop, he needed help. He needed something to hold on to. Now!

Gibbs was there again next. Tony's body was shaking. He was clenching his teeth so hard together it almost hurt, not that he noticed that much.

Then Gibbs' hand took a hold of his. It was warm and strong and his was cold and sweaty and desperate. Gibbs was holding on to him. He was talking to him.

"You will be okay. Breath. Breath, Tony." He was saying. He didn't feel okay. He tried to say that to Gibbs, but it didn't work. He couldn't form words. He was so scared. Something was terribly wrong.

He tried to hold on to Gibbs harder. He had to help him! He needed help. He couldn't do this! He was dying. He was pretty sure. He couldn't focus on anything, other than the hand in his. He could feel his eyes starting to water. He was crying now. He didn't want to do it, but it took to much effort to try to stop.

Other shapes floated into his sight, it might be Ducky. Someone fiddled with his eyelids after wiping the tears away. He didn't want them to touch his head. He made the mistake of trying to move his head, and it made him so dizzy, so he let them.

They were talking. Asking. Looking. He couldn't focus. It needed to end. And then it did.

- NCIS -

Hej! I thought it was time to write another NCIS story. It was a while ago since I did that. I like to write about emotions and how the characters are dealing with what's happening to them. It might get them a bit out of character. The medical things will mostly be made up.
I hope you will like the story! Let me know what you think :)