Wonder.
I don't own anything but my perverted brain.
Warnings; Shota-ish? Perverted pedo ghosts? xD Kinda angsty.
Rating more for Sai's thoughts then anything. Though I was trying for PornWithoutPlot. But that didn't work. More notes at the bottom.
Review please. (Edited Sept 5th 2009 Punctuation and a little wording.)
Shindo was the only thing he could feel. Sai mused as he watched Shindo's chest rise, and fall rhythmically. Taunting him with the life he could no longer enjoy.
He sat by his Goban. His legs neatly tucked underneath him, and his fan pressed sharply against his lips. Even that small amount of ghost pain could not bring him out of his dark thoughts.
Shindo was the only thing he could sense. Truely sense. As if he, himself, was breathing again.
He could sense the boys heat against his skin. He could taste the boys scent, and only his.
All around him was Shindo. He could hold him and be held back. He could hit him, and feel the sharp bite of pain that he couldn't feel otherwise, and he could hit back.
Sai was old so very very old; even so, every once in a while, like now, he had carnal desires.
Watching Shindo. Smelling his boyish scent. Feeling his body heat radiate far into the room, enveloping him. He could not help but wonder if because he could sense Shindo as if he were alive, if maybe he could touch Shindo too.
If he could touch him that way, bring Shindo into a shaking heap of ecstasy. If Shindo could touch him too, and bring him to that. He desired it. Oh, how he wanted it... but Shindo was so young. So, very very young. Young children attached themselves. He saw it even now. The fondness in Shindo's eyes.
He knew even when Shindo treated him with borderline cruelty that Shindo would be lost without him. Maybe not for very long, but if he left it would leave a lingering bitterness in the boy.
Oh, how he selfishly wished.
He didn't want to be forgotten. He could already see himself starting to fade. The bloodstains, worn before, looked as if they were slowly being sanded off. He didn't have much time left.
He brushed his pale fingers gently against the proof of his existence, and frowned.
So why was he so afraid to touch Shindo. To give into his animalistic desires. Maybe, it was because he was afraid. After so long of searching for the hand of god he was just, weary... Tired of life, and maybe if he became content for even a second, he would lose his chance at purgatory. For what? To watch the boy he had come to admire, too ... love... wither away, and die.
He didn't want to take that chance, but oh how he ached to know. To touch the sweet innocence right in front of him.
So, he watched, and wondered from beside the Goban. Go all but pushed to the back of his mind.
His new obsession slept, unknowing of his plight before him.
Shindo was the only thing he could feel, and he hoped that before he went the boy would touch him first. If only just to let Sai know that Shindo didn't want him to leave.
Pure and simple. The first sentence of this drabble thing just popped into my head when I was reading the Manga, and so I opened up Notepad 'cause I was curious of where it would go. Please, tell me what you think.
No Beta equals choppy writing. I'm sorry about that.
