To Go Amongst Mad People

Title: The Seven Signs

Pairing: Alice/Jasper

Warning and/or Summary: AU, AH Do you like rainbows? Alice does. Read her take on what rainbows means in her words. Slightly dark, implied abduction and abuse.

To see other entries in the To Go Amongst Mad People contest, please visit the Contest's FanFiction page:

http:// www(dot)fanfiction(dot)net / u /2128870/



Jasper POV

Bright: Lights that pierce through the gloomy mist as cars parade down the silent road. Dark: Somber faces, pale in the eve of morrow, with the tracks of tears that mark their sorrow.

Cloudless night and midnight hue, birds silenced by the darkness; reminding me of flashing limbs and jazzy blues. I miss her - that ethereal being; her light, tingly laugh, her whimsical, little smile, the flutter of her heartbeat as we lay entwined.

I stand in the swirling mist, hands in my pockets, alone and stand-offish, away from the crowd. My eyes stare into the distance, my soul cries out for her.

Alice.

I stare blankly, the memory of our starlit night clear in my mind; the fresh scent of her perfume, her hair flowing over me, as I rolled us over and over; the sweet smell of the crushed grass beneath our bodies; the feel of her skin, smooth under my questing fingertips; the feel of her tightening around me while she gazed down upon me, my love reflected in her eyes; and the ecstasy found under the celestial beings that she claimed blessed us as we lay under their guiding light. Gone. Leaving me alone. Alice.

I had lived in torment for the past eight months, searching for any and all signs of her. The police had given up after a few weeks, but I had not. I would never give up. She was out there.

Inclining my head, I look up at the sky, seeking her star. I stare hard at it, feeling its beauty. I cannot help but feel she is forgiving me and knowing it is futile because I cannot forgive himself.

For the first three months I'd been in a medically induced coma. I know my brain had swelled after the injuries I'd received from James; the horrendous attack I had barely survived. Only the thought of my fairy-like creature gave me the strength to stay alive until the paramedics arrived. But I know I would never forgive myself for the time I spent in a coma; she'd spent the equal amount of time laying in a bed, trying to feign one as she lay beneath James' heaving body. I was barely able to hold on to my sanity after finding her words in the hidden journal, after knowing that I had not been able to spare her that.

I will never forgive or forget.

For five long months I had not been able to find her. Five months of hiring the best private investigators, of following every lead however false or spurious it may have been, and the agony I had suffered for not being any closer was great. But everyday, I never gave up hope that I would find her.

It had been all of an hour after finding out their location that we had finally kicked down the door of James and Victoria's summer hideaway and found her.

I close my eyes at the memory of Esme's voice screaming, the frantic shrillness as she'd pulled her baby girl out of the ice cold shower, and I had known.

Alice. She was my elfin girl, the tiny woman who gave me life, hope, and the will to keep going in this world that was often too full of angst, aggression, and oppression, but it pained me to think that she had given up in the end. I whisper up to the star, "What did you go through baby, that you couldn't wait for me to reach you?"

The ethereal being who was my silence, my peace, the tranquility in this bedlam, this confusion. She was my lucky charm, my light, my everything-that-held-meaning in this world.

"Alice, I love you baby."

I turn at the touch on my arm. Edward. I fall into the arms of the man we both loved. I choke out, "She was supposed to wait for me. She was supposed to wait."

"I know, Jay. I know." Edward holds me as I weep. Edward understood. He always did. "It's time Jay. We have to say goodbye."

I nod weakly. We make our way to the little mound, and both of us think that it's such an insignificant little resting place for such a larger than life being. My eyes gaze down a little sadly as I look upon the mound of earth that covers her final resting place.

I sniff, then speak aloud to those gathered around her small plot, the ones who had been patient enough to wait with me until midnight, her favorite time.

"Do you love rainbows? Alice did. Red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet. She said that it was a wonderful journey through a broad spectrum of colors. It reminds me of happier times. It was a rainbow that helped me find my Alice. I had that rainbow song in my head after my kindergarten class ended, and I could not help but to sing it as I walked along looking at the glorious rainbow in the sky.

She unknowingly approached me as she walked along, looking up at that same rainbow, and I literally bumped into her. Leo Tolstoy's words had echoed in my head, 'He felt now that he was not simply close to her, but that he did not know where he ended and she began,' as I held her hand to steady her. That was when I fell in love with rainbows, and with her. There was a rainbow after I proposed to her, one knee in slick mud in the spring of April showers. There was a rainbow when Alice and I got married," I pause and close my eyes at another memory. "I hope there are rainbows wherever you are Alice."

"Red and yellow and pink and green, purple and orange and blue; I can sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow too..."

I swear I can hear her voice as I sing, and I smile as the image of Alice dancing beneath one of her beloved rainbows shines briefly in my mind's eye.

Alice Whitlock - wife, daughter, sister, saviour...Life.

~*~

Alice POV

Do you love rainbows? I do. You go from one end of the spectrum to the other; red, orange, yellow, green, blue, indigo, violet. Three different types of blue! It's a wonderful journey! It reminds me of so many happy times. Did you know that it was a rainbow that helped me find my Jasper? He was singing that rainbow song when he bumped into me as I walked along staring at a rainbow in the sky. Of course as soon as he bumped into me I knew, it was him. You know - the one, Him. And then, there was a rainbow after Jasper proposed to me on bended knee, sliding in mud. I'll even forgive him for dirtying the brand new Hugo Boss jeans I had purchased for him only a week before. There was even a rainbow when Jasper and I got married. Did you know that there was a rainbow in the sky for every happy moment with Jasper in my life?

And now my life on Earth has ended, it is still rainbows that I can see.

R O Y G B I V

Red: the color of my blood as it mixed with the water, swirling around in ever decreasing circles as it ran toward the plug. The vibrant varying hues of red tinting the water, a dizzying kaleidoscope of clear water, whirling vermilion and coiling crimson like one of the signs of the Apocalypse. The color of anger, of war, as he and I fought; the cries that rose above the glass that crashed against the marble floor, over the sound of the wedding porcelain that smashed and splintered upon the walls, and over the wretched tearing of my heart. It was the color that streaked randomly on door-frames, splashes that adorned the previously pristine white walls, smeared by my hand, and my head as I had made my way to the bathroom - stumbling, injured and afraid.

"Marry her James. Our baby cannot be born out of wedlock." She stared with such blind adoration at James. I needed to find a way out. She caressed my cheek and I flinched. "How does it feel to know you're going to be a bigamist, Alice? Victoria's eyes were strangely assessing, and I shivered despite the sun as she spoke, "Well, I always said you were the darling little one. So pretty. You'll produce such lovely offspring with the right man."

Orange: Can voices have a flavor? Victoria's does. It's saccharine sweet like candied orange peel; its cloying sweetness contrasting sharply with the orange-brown of the fall leaves as they wheeled me out to the waiting ambulance. The cloying scent of the fruit that hung in the air as her breath wafted over me whenever I threw up from morning sickness. The acrid scent of stale juice as I cleaned it off the walls.

Goosebumps rose on the back of my neck as she caressed my stomach. "Only a few months to go before we get our baby James," she cooed at my round belly, "and this tramp can go back where she came from. What a shame you and I can't make it without her." She lifted my shirt and touched my flesh. My skin crawled. I tried to pull my hand away as his hand grabbed mine and he placed his ring upon it. "I take you, Alice Whitlock to be my wedded wife."

Forgive me Jasper.

Yellow: the bright yellow lights that shone in my eyes as I travelled down the corridors, the voices that clamored above my head as doctors and nurses worked on keeping me alive. The lights made my mother's hair turn a strange yellow instead of her usual caramel - our hairdresser would have a fit if he saw that, but she was not as clear to me as the color of the doctor's hair; platinum under the lights as his tears flowed down his face, pleading with me to stay with him. I guess I'm still Daddy's girl after all.

"No matter what darling, you'll be my girl, my princess. Even when you are all grown up."

"But Daddy, how will my prince find me if you won't let boys near me?"

"If your prince is worthy, he will find a way."

Green: the clean color I will always associate with Forks. The dense foliage as we drove past it on the way home that day, the forest that hid the treasure trove of cornucopia of food aplenty. Animals of all shapes and sizes that helped to appease our hunger as James hunted them daily and brought them home for me to scalp, clean, and cook. The color of Death.

Blue: The color of his eyes, those Arctic-like ice blue eyes that held mine until my last dying breath. Never veering to the side, never moving away as my hapless fingers released their death grip on the blade that I'd used for my escape, never moving from their silent contemplation of my naked, bruised, and swollen body that carried the combined essence of us, our child. Eyes that were so like the eyes of the man I loved, yet so far from similar it wasn't funny. But in my death it was cornflower blue eyes, full of love and warmth that I held on to, and it was Jasper's eyes that carried me to the other side.

"I, Jasper take thee Alice, to be my lawfully wedded wife. To have and to hold, from this day forth..." The words were just a buzzing in my ears as I stared at the man who in a few minutes would be my husband. His beautiful blue eyes stared down at me and I could feel the flush rising in my face as they promised a wedding night to remember.

The indigo, the same shade of midnight blue sky matched my eternal dress as the sun slunk down beyond the horizon after my funeral; the celestial beings broke through and twinkled their heavenly signs above the mourners. If there was anything at all out there in that cosmic universe, I hoped that it gave my family the profound insights, and instant understandings that come out of that blue. Because they chose indigo, the color of the inky sky for my funeral garb, my own natural indigo dye, and it was the same color of the pervasive tendrils of self awareness that snaked their way into the tattered remnants of my broken family. Indigo, the color of profound wisdom and spiritual realization. My almost-favorite color. Bringing me finally to....

"Ally honey, where did you put my jacket?" I leaned against the side of the door as I watched him racing around gathering his things. He always left everything to the last minute. He looked up and walked towards me with that elegant lope of his. His lips turned at the corners as he took in the jacket that rested at the end of my fingertips. "You're gorgeous Ally baby, but next time? Tell me you have my jacket which have my keys, so we aren't late seeing your folks. I'm sure your Daddy still times me with that old stopwatch of his, to make sure his baby girl is safe. And every single time we're even a little late, he looks at me like I've done something wickedly debaucherous with you on the side of the road. You do like me with my balls intact, don't you?" I gave a throaty wicked laugh and pulled him in for a lengthy kiss.

Daddy will have to wait a few minutes longer... make that another hour...

Did you know that Yin is blue and Red is Yang? And that Blue and Red mixed together is Violet? If yin and yang are in harmony, it leads to a quiescent mind. Violet. Therefore Violet is Quiescence - the ultimate state of being. The harmony of the universe. I was always Blue, and Jasper was always Red. He is my opposing nature, my quick-to-defend-the-weak, hard-to-trust man, but super focused and loyal when he learns to trust and love, and only ever aggressive in his defense of me. He is my rock in the storm of life; hard, dry, solid. I am his slow-to-anger, soft-in-emotion, his ethereal, insubstantial being, his tranquility. I am the Mountain, and he is the Valley. We are Yin and Yang. And if violet is the only color that represents the true harmony of the universe - the state of quiescence - a state of being that happens only when I am with my Jasper, then we are violet.

On this earthly plane, we will never be violet again.

Violet - the flowers he placed upon my grave as he weeps and my ghostly fingers run through his blond hair offering a small measure of comfort to the man who loved me. Jasper - it should always have been Jasper. Never James.

"And as the lamb opened the seventh seal on the scroll, silence covered the sky..."

To my dear Jasper:

I love you not only for what you are,
but for what I am when I am with you.

I love you not only for
what you have made of yourself,
but for what you are making of me.

I love you because you have done more
than any one else
could have done to make me good,
and more than any fate
could have done to make me happy.

You have done it without a touch,
without a word,
without a sign.
You have done it by being yourself.

And now, we are done with all the colors of the rainbow. And the colors of the Apocalypse of my life.

"And as the lamb opened the seventh seal on the scroll, silence covered the sky..."

~*~

His voice floats over the purple hued air as morning nears, and he sings her favorite song, their song: "Red and yellow and pink and green, purple and orange and blue; I can sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow too..."

Jasper swears he can hear her voice sing their amended line, "I will sing a rainbow, sing a rainbow... until you follow too..." He smiles as a rainbow shines briefly in the sky and he whispers, "Goodbye, Alice my love."