It's been three years Daddy
I really really miss you
The rebellion is going strong
And everyone is still trying to comfort me
The guys that rescued me are great
Luke still acts like a kid
He still has the innocence
The innocence I lost long ago
Han on the other hand is completely different
He treats me like a normal person
Which has helped me more than anything
But he's always been there
They think I work myself to death
They might be right
I sit on the roof some nights
And watch the light that I know will always be Alderaan
Then Han will manage to ruin my perfect moment with a snide remark
Then he realizes I've been crying
He'll sit down and hold me
And the moment is perfect again
I think I'm falling in love
You are the greatest daddy
I try to not cry
They tell me it's okay to cry
I know you don't like it when I cry
I try daddy, but it hurts, everything reminds me of you and home
Home, I think I'm finding a new one
But it'll never replace Alderaan, and you
Han told me the other day he would have liked to meet you
Which is strange
He is always threatening to leave
He has a debt to Jabba the Hutt
He was a smuggler, a pirate, a scruffy Nerfherder
But he's been here for three years
Do you think I'm falling in love?
He kissed me the other day
It was unexpected and
Wonderful
It felt like home
I had to run away because I felt myself breaking down
Even though he's seen me cry more than anyone else
Treyc was a great guy Daddy
I might have even married him
I know you thought he was my perfect match
But I don't think it would have lasted long
I don't know what you would think of Han, Daddy
On the first impression, you would probably think the same thing I did
Idiot, self centered, mercenary, Nerfherder, egotistical, lewd, arrogant…
My point is made
But once you got to know him
Maybe you would think what I do now
All those things, but he has a soft side, he's taken care of me from the start
He's loyal and kind
I think he says all those things just to get me mad at him
I think I'm in love with him
What would you say?
Given the circumstances of my life
I think you might be happy for me
Happy that I found something, someone
What should I do Daddy?
I don't know anymore
I'm scared
I don't want my heart to be broken again
I trust him with my life
Should I trust him with my heart?
Should I trust him to love me?
For all I know, he just wants to get me in his bed before he blasts off
He's known for that
But maybe that's just his way of hiding his own scars
Thanks Daddy
I love you
I miss you so much
I wish Han could meet you
Maybe then it wouldn't be so hard to tell him
Tell him that I love him
I miss you Daddy
Han stared at the letter that he shouldn't have read, the letter that Leia would kill him for reading, as tears rolled down his face. This twenty-one year old woman, who was still so broken inside, loved him. Wanted him to meet her father, one man he could never meet. Meant so much to her that by simply hugging her he could restore her perfect moments. Was writing a letter to her father about him, one he would never read, but could answer her many questions.
"I promise you sir, if she ever comes to me, I'll never let her down. I would never become another scar on her heart."
Leia fled the room, the room Han hadn't known she was in, as tears rolled down her cheeks. How could he love me, how could he promise that, how could he give up his freedom like that?
"Leia?" he came calling later. "I haven't seen you all day."
"I've seen you, you were in my, your, the cabin you let me use."
"Listen Leia, I didn't mean to read that letter. I'm fine pretending like I never did read it. I'm fine continuing as if it never happened."
"No."
"What?"
"No, because if you did that, then I'd have to pretend that I didn't hear what you said after you read it."
Ah, sorry if it sucked. I was listening to the 9/11 remix of Heaven by DJ Sammy, and it inspired me.
