When Only Tears Are Left
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the SM characters...blah blah blah
Author's Note: this is a repost, cause I'm trying to make the html work. dankiez to TenshiKachuu for reviewing the story ^.~
This Is Dedicated To The Ones Who Lost Their Lives In The Disgusting Act Of Terrorism on 9.11.o1
may our hearts and prayers go out to the families of the victims... may the Lord give them strength.
.ยท.
I'm Tsukino Usagi. Fourteen years old and in the ninth grade at Juuban Junior High. My birthday, June 30, a Cancer. Blood type O. My dream is to become a beautiful bride. I like the colors pink and white. I hate carrots. I'm very happy-go-lucky. But not today. Today I broke up with my one true love. My destiny. God I wish I can somehow change. I would change anything, just so he can love me again. The more I think about it, the more I realize that maybe it's all my fault. I should have tried harder to make this relationship work.
But then on the other hand... do I still really love him? We can alter our destiny. Anyone can alter it, with the slip of the tongue, or flick of the wrists. When I first met him I thought he was so cruel and arrogant. But when Rei-chan wanted him, I was really jealous. But Rei-chan gave him up because of our destiny, as prince and princess of the earth and moon. Endymion and Serenity. I still love him, I know that I do... but does he still love me? Does he even care about me?
As I sit here, in this filty phone booth, crying, I think about why he would break my fragile heart like this. Doesn't he know we were meant to be together?! I guess not. Men are so clueless, but I still love him. What did I do to make him break up with me? Is it because I'm too childish? I can change, my love... just for you! But still, you shun me and tell me not to change. What is it that you want from me? Can't you see that I need you? I know that deep, deep down, you need me too. Why didn't you show any emotion when you told me you couldn't see me anymore? Are you seeing someone else? Do you think you're not worthy enough for me?
Why didn't I see this coming? I know why. We were in so much love... just the other day we were kissing in the park, until ChibiUsa-chan came falling onto my head. You took me rowboating on the lake. It was so peaceful... I was happy, and so were you. At least I think you were. Laughing at my crude attempts at a joke... telling me about your friends... the sweet kisses we shared on the lake, surrounded by lily pads...
I can remember the day when I met you. I threw my test paper at you. A thirty. I was really upset cause Mama would kill me, and you just sort of rubbed it in my face, calling me Odango Atama. You only did that once you know. After that I was Usako to you... your Usako. And when you told me that you loved me, it was pure bliss...
And then I remember being so scared that you didn't remember me... you're memory became Tsukikage no Knight. Tears of joy streamed down my face as I felt your sweet lips against mine, when your body and memory became one again... Did you cry? Did you feel the same way as I did, when we were reuninted again?
But now we're apart. Not together. We're not a couple anymore. I still ask myself why. Why did you leave me? Why did you want me to go? Did I spend too much of your money? Am I too immature? Am I intollerable? I need a reason! A true honest to God reason! You just can't leave me pondering me like this! It's tearing me apart! Mamo-chan please! Please Mamo-chan come back to me!
Now I sit here, in this filthy phone booth, drying up my tears. I still love you. I still need you. I still want you. But I'm too good for you to cry over you. Eventually I'll get over you. There are other men out there you know. You may even get jealous of me when you steal a glance at me and a new boyfriend kissing in the same park where ChibiUsa-chan fell on me. The only thing left of my mourning of our break up is the small puddle of tears on the bottom of this phone booth. I won't break your heart, like how you broke mine. Revenge isn't sweet. Now you can't come over for dinner like how Mama requested. She's a really great cook you know... oh well your loss. Speaking of food I'm hungry...
I'm Tsukino Usagi. Fourteen years old and in the ninth grade at Juuban Junior High. My birthday, June 30, a Cancer. Blood type O. My dream is to become a beautiful bride. I like the colors pink and white. I hate carrots. I'm very happy-go-lucky. But not today. Today I broke up with my one true love. My destiny. But that's okay. Destiny can be altered. I'm still missing you. I'm still loving you, but you know what Mamo-chan? I'll be all right, even without you by my side.