I: Metamorphosis

There had been many lights flashing before my eyes after I died. It sounds generic doesn't it? Soon I would see a giant, white stairway that led me straight to Heaven. Possibly fire would swallow me whole, and all my misdeeds shall drag me to the very depths of Hell. I wasn't the overly religious type in life, but then again we only speculate what exists in the afterlife. Nothing is known, nothing is set in stone, one can only wonder what the great answer to life is. We, as humans, believe in a great many Gods and Goddesses. But oh, how we were wrong.

Then, as if the world beneath me sighed in boredom, deep bubble like bodies of blues, pinks, and greens came up from down below and flew by me. They didn't have any set shape or size. They gave off no temperature and made no sound. Simply rising before me and in seconds they were gone. Their metallic gasoline colors shining brightly in this desolate space.

Had they even gone up or had they fallen down? There was no real sense of direction here, wherever here was. I felt like I was floating but it was as if I was in some great body of water but also, something completely different. To be able to describe this feeling, I would need to see something, to feel something. Something tangible and maybe some gravity so I could feel that gut wrenching sensation. It was neither cold nor hot and it certainly was not dry nor wet.

Now oranges, greys, and sparkles of gold imploded and covered my entire body. It enveloped me much like the womb did once before when I was but a speck in the world. Encasing me into what felt like a fiery tomb, but without the fearing of being burning alive. Was I going to go out as I came into this world? Scared, alone, and nothing more than a babe in the grand scheme of time?

But those sunset colored lights weren't the only things that occupied this empty space. Something was under me and it grew larger by the second. The space around me began to feel tight and heavy, as if a deep gloom had set in. All of a sudden, millions of tiny lights appeared all around me. Like candles floating on a river, they flickered and slowly circled around, drifting. Since my body felt like it was stuck, I whipped my head around and tried to turn as best I could to see what was going on. These weird Christmas lights were really starting to freak me out.

Then, as if forgotten and angry, the thing that loomed beneath me roared to life. The sound was louder than anything I've ever heard in my life and my arms refused to move, I could not cover my ears. The vibrations broke through my ear drums, blood shot out and floated in the space around me. Like some twisted dance, the drops flew off and twirled towards the glimmering lights.

The pain was unbearable and I screamed, but the sounds were cut short, if I was able to make any sounds at all. Vibrations shook my head but I could hear nothing around me. The darkness that I hung in ate anything that left my mouth like a hungry animal. Gravity seemed to hold me even tighter and my eyes began to bulge. The blood within them, boiling, angry and spiteful.

Out of nowhere, pink streaks rose up and swirled in the open spaces between the lights. Trembling and shuddering like flames licking upwards towards the heavens. The monstrosity beneath me reared its ugly head at last. Petals of pure rage and hunger rippled until they arrived merely a yard away. It did nothing to ease my pains, tears welled up in my eyes and I struggled to keep them open. The soft luminescent pinks which once might have looked comforting, merely looked malicious and terrifying.

The cold sweat that began minutes ago was now in full effect. My body became drenched and if I could shiver, I would have. Unfortunately my body defied me in every sense and self control was lost. All I was able to do now was stare down the horribly beautiful rose strips that wiggled before me.

Suddenly I felt my neck lighten and I had an odd feeling in my stomach. The range in which I could move my neck increased without warning, causing the muscles to convulse and jolt in a horrible way. This gave me a bout of fear and suspicion. That's when I felt the pulse of energy from below me. It was comparable to a gust of wind and it managed to shake me to my very core. It nipped at my still heart and disturbed the once silent blood which sat in their streams. I tried to crane my neck to the view below me and my head lobbed pitifully with a jolt.

It happened as soon as my eyes landed on it. A giant oculus shape that peered into me with such intensity. My entire body was a book, secrets and lies were free to be read by the glaring piece below. When its eye met mine, the black, void like pupil stretched and a beam of light shot upwards into my own eyes. The light, so powerful and fierce exploded and caused my eyes, which rested inside the sockets, to burst. Now my form was nothing more than a husk hanging in the air. The strings that should hold this marionette were invisible, and my gaping mouth trembled from the pain. Had my mother seen this, she would weep for me.

The creature decided that its morbid dance was done and that my life had truly come to an end. Having destroyed my physical eyes, it gave me the power to see without them. It knew I was afraid and this thing fed off of it. Like some sociopath's sick and twisted enjoyment of a snuff film. It was a cruel child who sat in a corner, slowly and tediously ripping the legs of a spider off, one by one. The chaos of a shaking web, childlike wonder, and an ignorant evil grin.

Closing in on me, its stalks grew in size and number, their intensity heightened the fear within me. I had never wanted to die in the first place and now it was going to be in the most dreadful way possible. Was the end going to be like this for everyone else or had I done something wrong? Was I evil? Did the actions of my difficult childhood condemn me before I even knew better? Why me?

These questions would never be answered. For I was thrown into a cruel joke such as this one. It was frightening to think that I deserved this. The tears mixed with blood rained down my face and out into the twisted beauty surrounding me as the abomination circled around me. Its eerie petals began lazily swirling together, as if they were colossal pieces of a puzzle. The darkness faded as they interlocked within each other.

The pink radiance was the only thing my dead eyes could bear witness to now. The afterglow reaching beyond my pitiful lens' and into the eye of my mind. I knew what was before me now but there was nothing that could possibly describe it. If I could feel anything, I'm sure it would be warm. Or at least, I hoped it would be. The way the flush color smoldered made it look similar to a dying ember in the fireplace. Dying in the dark. Much like I was, while suspended in this peculiar space.

With the last of my energy being drained, I finally felt a sense of peace. At last, the end of darkness and pain. Sleep would be my solace. My empty eyes were so very heavy and the lids began to shut on their own. It was as if they were telling me it was okay and I could let go. Just let go of everything. As I let the gloom consume me, I heard a familiar voice calling out. Whether it was of my own creation or simply delirium setting in, I don't think I'll ever know.

But what mattered was that the voice was a comfort, the last human interaction I would ever have. A whisper in my heart and a shadow in my ears. And finally, peace.


The way the wind blew across me and the sunlight that engulfed me, it was all too real. The last thing I remembered was sharp pain and darkness caressing me. That thing which swallowed my very soul. Then had come an emptiness I never knew could exist. In such a short amount of time, I had felt more than I ever did in my lifetime.

And now? Now, I was a plant.

Probably a flowering plant from the way I moved in the breeze. Possibly some sort of herb or small bush. I could feel, as much as one could as a plant, my roots were deep underground and absorbing the nutrients from the soil. My delicate petals and leaves all moved together in a strange dance and my stem, strong and sturdy, held me in place whilst I gently rocked to and fro.

I vaguely remember a time when I was but a sapling, it had been a long time ago, or at least what I felt was a time long gone. It was truly hard to picture time when you don't really have a brain and an active imagination. I had been smaller, my roots not as long or numerous, and there were no petals nor leaves reaching for the sunlight. The strange sensation when these things did begin to grow was almost like an itch but it never bothered me, instead, it felt rather pleasing. It was not warm but it was not cold, the earth where my roots dug in was simply there. Feeding me precious nutrients and providing stability.

It was a good feeling but something still bothered me as I grew into the large plant I was now.

This never would have been my first choice if I was asked what I wanted to be if I was reborn. The thought of reincarnation had never really occurred to me in the first place now that I think of it. After dying, I'd always imagined being cradled by weightlessness and then disappearing into nothingness. Like a bubble when you pop it, it just doesn't exist any longer. Speckles of it fall to the ground but those would simply be energy embedded into the soil of the world. Old life giving back to new life.

Yet here I was, somewhere obviously high up due to the constant breeze and lack of any consistent sound. No people walked by and there was no sounds of traffic or horns blaring. I could not hear or feel the chirps of birds happily singing. Only the vibrations of the wind and earth shuddering every so often. And a smell, so distinct and yet so strange and foreign, I was unable to really tell what it was.

Funny thing about being a plant was, time didn't really have any meaning anymore. I could tell when the sun rose and set, felt the moonlight or the rain, but it didn't exactly spell out the hour. Things happened and life moved forward, that's all I could tell. As far as I knew, I could have been here for months and possibly years. Maybe even decades.

As time moved on and the elements of nature weathered me, I could almost begin to feel weary. Maybe I thought in broken sentences but I didn't have emotions, not completely. Happiness came and went, as did sadness. It was akin to being warm and cold respectively. Maybe being luke warm was simply being content, I'm truly not an expert on plants much less becoming one. Botany had never been my strong suit. I can barely recall killing off my fair share of house plants back in my days as a human.

So when I felt the dirt tremble and the vibrations of footsteps in my direction, I felt anxious. Antsy perhaps. Being alone for however long I had been, with no other plants or even grass to accompany me, suddenly having a person or animal approach me seemed daunting. A shadow fell over me and the wind stopped, only adding to my stress. I could practically feel some of my leaves begin to quiver and shrivel up. That whole thing about plants feeling emotion and pain isn't far off from the truth.

They knelt beside me and reached a hand out, gently grasping a leaf and feeling the indentation in the middle. Next, my petals felt as if they were massaged when the being held a couple between it's forefingers and gave it a couple rubs. I felt a chuckle through the air so what came next was a pain to rival my first death experience.

This thing, this monster, plucked me out the ground with no warning. My roots tearing to pieces and my stem harshly grabbed, becoming bent in several places. Every single molecule in my grassy body screamed in pain and agony. There was so much hurting and then - darkness claimed me yet again. Hopefully there would be no third time, I don't think that would be very charming.


The first thing that happened when I awoke, was realizing that I could truly feel once again. There was a cold, dank liquid that consumed me. Bubbles, which came from below, much like before, brushed against me before disappearing. Vibrations from sounds rippled through me and made me shudder. Other than this, there was nothing. Perhaps a voice calling out or maybe even a wave of heat, beyond the coldness of the glass that contained me, it was difficult to tell where I was.

Time once again passed without me being able to really tell what was going on. There may have been a moment where I felt something pulling at me, it came from the space next to me, beyond the confines of the liquid. It felt familiar and warm, like energy trying to reach out to me, calling for me, like a child's plea.

The feeling it gave me made me feel gloomy, a sadness set in and I could almost feel my petals grow heavy even in this suspended state. Whatever was calling me, never relented. It kept on and on, like an alarm that just would not stop. I wanted to answer, truly I did, but I didn't know how to.

Then two things happened, the feeling beside me, that comforting and yet nagging feeling suddenly stopped. Like a candle whose flame was hushed, it was there and then, it was not. Somehow this feeling of dread washed over me and that horrible gloom became more intense. Was that going to happen to me as well? Would I be snuffed out in an instant at some mad man's mercy?

The second thing came in the form of sounds and vibrations. I could not hear per say, but the screams of pain from some dying animal reached me. It was loud and saddening, causing me to stir uneasily. Even through the clammy, frigid prison, I could feel the anguish and it called to me again, but it was angry and yet, pleading. It blamed me, something in the very fiber of my being could tell, even so, it seemed to reach for me. Desperate and unyielding.

Time once again passed and the only things that lingered in my company was the thick oozing liquid around me, the terrible screams of pain, and the occasional flickers of hot energy. It felt as if I had been there for an eternity. I wanted to reach for the familiar feeling of dirt and water from the ground, but with a sudden realization, I noticed my roots were gone. With no way to find earth to be in, I felt naked and open, as if anyone could easily take advantage of me, however one would take advantage of a plant. The lack of sunlight made my body feel even more depressed, there was no wind to carry my petals or to have me dance in. If I had a mind, I would have truly gone mad by now.

Suddenly the screaming vibrations stopped and a strange emptiness filled the space. The abrupt silence bothered me, that comfort and familiarity was gone, snuffed out, most likely by the monster who plucked me from the earth. I would forever remember that horrible, callused hand ripping me from my home. That very hand reached and grasped me now, the thick gelatin sliding off of me, and it brought me into the light.

This feeling reminded me of drowning in the ocean and being brought up into the fresh air, only this air was dank and evil. It suffocated me and felt dark. This foul air tainted my very soul, or whatever was left, if I had one anymore. The unfriendly cold and clammy hands carried me and placed my lanky plant body onto a cold surface. I would have shuddered, trembled, even cried out, but there I lay, frozen and defenseless.

Suddenly a hot and searing pain filled me, blistering and maddening. It ate its way into my roots, took hold of me, and as much as I wished for empty darkness to take me again, it would not. I lay there in strange agony, unable to understand the pain and torture I was going through. I could feel the pain, but it was unlike anything I had ever experienced when I had a human body.

Those rough and monstrous fingers picked me up yet again and carried me to another spot in this malicious place. His cackling worried me and I was carelessly placed into a container with strange, warm liquid. This was very different than where I had been and it almost felt comforting. As if on the verge of sleep, the warmth calmed me as I slowly sank downwards.

Time once again passed without any meaning but now, something was different. I could feel myself growing, almost morphing into something else. Petals became strands of hair, broken roots formed together making limbs, fingers, toes. Eyes began to form, muddled images came to view, a grey room hidden behind cloudy fluid. Was it possible? Was I becoming a human again? After being a plant for so long, this felt so foreign and terrifying. No longer had I wished to be a babe again, but had wanted the solace of being in the sands and dirt once more.

To actually feel your lungs form, the skin that would hold everything in to gradually grow and stretch over your bones, the feeling is just incredible and gross at the same time. It was like watching a slasher film in reverse, where the mass murder places organs in a tattered carcass and then puts the skin back on his victims. The slow creeping sensation of cells multiplying and stitching together. I could feel them, my fingers, stiff and refusing to move but I edged them on. Trying to pop my knuckles or even make a fist, something to show myself that I was truly in a human body afresh.

Sickening and somehow satisfying, I have always wanted to know what this would feel like, rebirth. I had become an experiment for a god or even demon and then given a life as a plant, only to be taken by a monster who was using me for their own experiments. Here it is, my great rebirth and second chance at living.

Most people usually think that their first act in a new life would be redemption, but for me, it was simply having my hands around someone else's neck and seeing how they like being plucked from existence. I thought to myself all the ways I could make this person pay. But little did I know, the world I was entering would be full of so much more than revenge.