Tony sits in his dark bedroom, which is filled with the soft glow of his TV screen. He is sitting on his bed, upright, emotionless.
He is watching security footage of the war in New York against the Chitauri a few months ago, but why?
Why is he hurting himself with these memories, these old promises of friendship and company?
A tear slides down his cheek as Captain America (O Captain, My Captain) beheads a Chitauri warrior on screen..
What, why would he feel especially saddened upon seeing Cap? He was no different, meant no more than the others. So why would he cry upon seeing that face again, that face he hasn't seen since..
No. He's crying for them all, of course. Anything else is ridiculous.

That does it. He refuses to doubt himself.
He switches the screen off and lies down again, trying to sleep.
But all that comes is Cap, in that ridiculous spangled costume.
Tony smiles to himself, unaware and uncaring, that Cap knows how to get under your skin.. But, in what way?
No. You don't think of Cap that way, not the fucking poster boy for American charm, not the fucking perfect, boyish golden boy, no fucking way.

What the hell has been wrong with Tony lately? He can normally disappear into his workshop for days at a time without pausing, Pepper makes sure he knows that. But for the past few weeks he finds himself thinking more and more of the Avengers (Cap) and where they (he) might be, if any of them know where the good Captain is..
He shakes his head again, can't let himself think of this, it will only make him worse. Besides, Cap is just too fucking goddamn perfect for a rock and roll bad boy like himself, the two would never work.
Not that Tony /wants/ them to work of course, that would be insanity, wouldn't it? He hasn't even thought about it, not really. Only when he found himself doing menial labour in his workshop, that is..

He flings an arm over his face, whimpering slightly, as the empty hole opens up inside him again. One thing about Tony, one thing nobody knows, is that he is lonely. He craves attention, comfort, friendship.. He just wants to feel emotionally connected to another person, to fill this aching void inside of him.

Giving up, he relaxes and eventually falls asleep, where even his dreams are plagued by Captain America, but here.. Tony finds his companionship in the poster boy for innocence.