Dear Malfoy,
Professor McGonagall says we're to plan a Christmas Ball together. Would you care to meet me in the common room this evening to discuss decoration?
Hermione.
P.s, I don't care what you want, you will be there.
Granger,
I am aware of our duties as head boy and girl, you don't have to remind me. I suppose that since you've made this meeting non-optional, and I don't want my balls hexed off via post, I'll be there.
Draco.
P.S, is it true that Weasel left you for Brown?
Malfoy,
Whether he did or not is none of your business. He did, though. I will see you tonight at seven-thirty.
Hermione.
P.S, Please, no snide comments about my blood status. I'm having a bad day as it is.
Granger,
I would like to say that I can refrain from making 'snide comments'. but I'm afraid that it just wont happen. He probably got tired of you getting your mudblood slime all over him.
Malfoy.
Granger,
That punch was totally uncalled for. How dare you mare the beauty and perfection that is Draco Malfoy! Also, since we never decided on a color palate, I'd like to suggest silver and gold.
Malfoy.
Ps, do you find it stupid that were sending notes, like second years, when we live in the same dormitory?
Malfoy,
Ha! Beauty and perfection my arse! How many bottles of hair gel do you use a day? Silver and gold sounds good.
Hermione
Ps, it's easier to talk to you when im not resisting the urge to throttle you.
Granger,
My hair is naturally perfect, thank you very much. Having urges about me, eh? I'm glad you approve of my color scheme, because its non-negotiable.
Malfoy
Ps, don't bother telling me I have a dirty mind, because I already know that.
Pps, Blaise told me, that Pansy said that Padma was told by Parvati, that you walked in on Weasel and Brown shagging last night.
Malfoy,
With all due respect, you are an arrogant, dim-witted, good-for-nothing, scummy, prick.
Hermione.
Granger,
No need to be rude.
Malfoy
Malfoy,
When speaking with you, there is always need to be rude.
Hermione
Two weeks later…
Granger,
McGonagall says we need to start on the menu. What do you suggest?
Malfoy
Malfoy,
If we're going to do this, we need to talk, face-to-face. Meet me in the common room at seven.
Granger.
Granger,
Yeah, whatever.
Malfoy.
Ps, if you hit me again, I'll hex you into next week.
Malfoy,
I'm writing to confirm the menu.
Mains
Chicken
Steak
Fish (salmon)
Tofu
Sides
Salad
Garlic bread
Bread & butter
Dessert
Ice-cream
Chocolate mouse
Chocolate cake
If you wish to make any adjustments, please write within fourteen days, as I need to notify the house elves of our selections.
Hermione.
Granger,
Are you always this stiff and formal? The menu is fine. Anyway, I was wondering who you're taking to the ball? I know you're going alone, but I want to hear it from you.
Malfoy.
Ps, I know I'm a sadistic prat. You don't have to tell me.
Malfoy,
It's none of your business. Kindly butt out, and stop owling me. I am confident that I can finish planning for the ball on my own.
Hermione.
Ps, I am going alone, as a matter of fact. Which of your Slytherin Sluts are you bringing?
Zabini,
What do you do if you like a girl who would never like you back?
Malfoy.
Malfoy,
Well, you never tell a girl you like her, it makes you look like an idiot! It doesn't matter though, you'll never have that problem, mate.
Zabini
Zabini,
As a matter of fact, it has happened. So I need some helpful advice, if it's not too much to ask.
Malfoy.
Malfoy,
I'll help you, if you tell me who it is…
Zabini
Zabini,
Guess.
Malfoy
Malfoy,
Is she in Slytherin?
Z.
Z,
Nope.
M.
M,
Ravenclaw?
Z.
Z,
Nope.
M.
M,
Hufflepuff?
Z.
Z,
Nope.
M.
M,
Woah, she's a Gryfindork?
Z.
Z,
Yeah…
M
M,
Is she a pureblood?
Z.
Z,
No.
M
M,
I'm just gonna assume the worst; is she a Mudblood?
Z
Z,
Yeah.
M
M,
Bushy Brown hair? Bookworm-ish?
Z
Z,
Yeah.
M
M,
It's Granger, isn't it?
Z
Z,
Yeah. Will you help me?
M
M,
You're in deep, my friend.
Z
A/N: thank you so much for reading! if you enjoyed this first installment, follow me! favourite me! Review! it really does help. also, read my other story, Revenge. Did you like the AVPM reference? I should have another chapter up soon, they don't take long to write, but i am also writing my other story. (you should read it!)
until the next update,
~P&D
