Megatron-A Random Act of Kindness
Disclaimer: I watched Animated for a while and thought it was pretty good. This...weird idea I had was inspired by watching it and watching a little of silly Friday night cartoons. It was also a random idea I had. Well, humor and all. It's quick, silly and...well, that's all that implies.
A good character is the best tombstone. Those who loved you and were helped by you will remember you when forget-me-nots have withered. Carve your name on hearts, not on marble.
Charles H. Spurgeon
By: VampireQueenAkasha
But you put on quite a show/Really had me going/Now it's time to go/Curtain's finally closing/That was quite a show/Very entertaining
-Rihanna, Take a Bow
Lugnut ran on a well build treadmill, panting heavily, his burly arms pumping at his sides. He sounded truly exhausted right now. The others watched him, amused. Even Megatron could not resist the amused smirk on his face.
"I'm ... I'm not in my happy place ... Lord Megatron!" he gasped, "My systems are gonna crash!"
Megatron sat in his throne, leaning back casually, taking a sip of his oil. "Keep it up a little longer for me, Lugnut." he told him, "This primitive Earthling generator needs more power until we retrieve a more suitable power source."
Lugnut panted heavily, struggling to keep up with Megatron's commands. He was too tired to continue and his legs suddenly gave beneath him. He gave a sharp cry and the treadmill sent him flying back, crashing into the wall.
"I'm okay ... " he groaned.
Blitzwing had been busy working on a large computer system and winced when a piece of metal on the treadmill came snapping loose, striking him dead on the backside. He looked back in surprise, and finally, his face shifted, revealing the angry red face.
"Who threw this watchamadookicky thingy at my ... " he began.
"It doesn't matter right now, Blitzwing," Megatron interrupted, rising from his throne. "For we have the necessary power to charge our ship and launch a full scale attack on the Autobot base. One in which they will never see coming."
Blitzwing grumbled, plucing the piece of metal from his backside with a curse. He waved it angrily at Lugnut, who was just rising. "You useless dead bolt!" he barked, "Next time, use your head!"
"Fine I will!" Lugnut barked, drawing his head back and meeting Blitzwing's with a nasty metallic smack. The jet Decepticon was sent flopping to the ground with a groan.
"Enough, you two." Megatron said, calmly. "Now let's go."
Lugnut stepped over Blitzwing and the jet laid there for a few moments, in pain. "That was not what I meant..." he muttered, referring to Lugnut's use of his head.
Megatron took his Decepticon minions to their newly fashioned warship. Megatron sat at his place in the command chair, of course and watched with a smirk as his henchmen took their places. He leaned back with a chuckled of pride.
"You're mine, Optimus ... "
O
Starscream crept his way carefully around to the back of the Autobot base, watching as they rolled out to prepare for their battle elsewhere. They would not ever even take notice him and his clones moving in to grab the Allspark.
"They're gone, let's go get it!" the purple Starscream babbled, clutching the wall and looking around warily, "Let's hurry before they get back!"
Starscream carefully moved into the base, looking around with a sort of satisfied, triumphant grin. Ahh, this would be easier than he originally thought. He dug around wildly through trunks and boxes, searching for the Allspark. Growling, he glared back at his two clones.
"Don't just stand there!" he snapped, "Get looking!"
The two clones nodded and started digging into stuff with him. The Gold Starscream grinned and picked up a big notebook in his hands. It was small, about the side of his finger, but he could see something drawn on the paper pages.
"Hey, come here, you two." he said.
The two gathered around him curiously. "The Allspark?" Starscream asked.
"No," the Gold Starscream told him.
There was a small, comical caricature of Starscream in the notebook. The three Seekers frowned down at such a crude image.
"Oh look, there's a Starscream drawing … Oh! And another … " the purple Starscream said.
Starscream snorted, shaking his head with annoyance. "That most certainly is not my visage whatsoever!" he snapped.
The Gold Starscream realized that it was a little flip book cartoon of Starscream walking along with goofy huge teeth and exaggerated big feet. "It would seem that the Autobot's pet has quite a ... sense of humor." he murmured, chuckling.
"What a stupid cretin!" Starscream snapped.
They watched the small Starscream picture get zapped by lightning and reduced to a pile of ashes with comically huge eyeballs.
"Oh look, he is a smudge!" the purple Starscream laughed.
Starscream scowled angrily, growling a fierce growl. He gave a side box a vicious kick. "That human will regret the day that she mocked me!" he raged. His foot triggered off an alarm within the base and he grunted with uneasiness. "Oh slag ... "
All around the trio of Seekers, several guns and cannons slowly appeared from within small areas of the wall. They held themselves, grunting warily.
"Of course ... " Starscream muttered, angrily. "What else is - - "
The guns went off right for them and the Seekers screamed.
O
Megatron, offline, but still alive, was carried back to the base by Lugnut. The Decepticons had suffered quite a defeat ... this time. And with Dr. Sumdac's new way to slow Megatron down, they would need a new plan of action.
"Megatron!" Lugnut cried, shaking his leader slightly. "Great one, awaken!"
Blitzwing struggled to yank a piece of metal from his neck. He growled with mock amusement at Lugnut's attempts. "He's...just sleeping, you dolt." he muttered. His maniacal, shadowed face giggled, spinning wildly. "So stop being such a baby, you idiot!"
Lugnut snarled at him, raising a burly fist. "You be quiet, or I'll ... " he began. A low moan behind him and Lugnut's attention was quickly averted to his waking leader. "Great one!"
Megatron groaned softly, rubbing the back of his neck. His optics dimmed and finally brightened, coming online and looking up at the Decepticons who crowded around him anxiously. The back of his neck sparked slightly, discolored and metal bent, but it was hardly even enough to be considered noticeable.
"Where ... what ... ?" he mumbled, dazed.
"You are safe, my lord," Lugnut told him, "The Autobots got away, but temporarily! Don't worry! They got lucky! They will not elude Lugnut again!" He beat his chest once with a grunt of eagerness. "You too were lucky as well!"
Megatron grumbled softly, tilting his head. There was now an odd look there in his optics. Could it actually be confusion?
"I have never seen you before in my life." he snapped.
That was a low blow to Lugnut and he gasped, staggering back. He began to stammer wildly. "B .. But ... It's me, your loyal and faithful warrior Lugnut!"
Blitzwing let loose a wild and maniacal laugh. "Oh, he's losing his marbles, is he not?" he hooted, "Wahhahahaha!"
Lugnut flashed him a glare, one in which Blitzwing responded in a calm and centered tone.
"Hostility is the calling card of a weak intellect, oh large and bulbous one!" he said, calmly.
Just before Lugnut could tackle the jet for speaking like that, Megatron slowly rose, looking around in some odd form of confusion. He walked around the darkened cavern, humming thoughtfully. Lugnut watched him with worry, but he kept his distance.
Megatron turned to the two 'Cons, cocking his head. "And who are the two of you to me?" he asked.
Lugnut started to speak, but Blitzwing stepped up, clasping a hand over Lugnut's mouth to shut him up. "Oh we are your comrades in arms, Megatron!" he told him, "Like ... friends, almost."
Megatron frowned at this. The sparking behind his head ripped through his mind, fading any memory of this at all. "Is this so?" he grumbled, optics bright red in suspicion and the two hoped that he remembered them.
He didn't.
An odd smile slithered onto those dark grey lips. "Ahh, very good then!" he said, in a strange tone that confused the two Decepticons further. He clasped both hands around their shoulders and pulled them close to him. "It is always good for one to have such companions so close in my time of need!"
Blitzwing stared at a just as confused Lugnut. "Okay, I am officially confused here." he said.
Megatron held them closer with a disturbingly friendly grin. "No need for confusion...friends." he told them, "What say we have some proper mech time?"
Blitzwing yelped at that, completely taking what was said out of context. He jerked from Megatron's grasp, his wild and maniacal face suddenly appearing. "This ain't right! Who are you?" he cried, running off. "Stop it! Stop it!"
Megatron raised a curious optic, looking down at Lugnut. "Now what do you suppose is eating him?"
O
Megatron's "new behavior" had only gotten stranger and stranger with each day. He was ... nice and rather cheery as well. And that just did not go well with the others at all. They gathered alone while he went out one day.
"This new Megatron is making me crazy!" Blitzwing griped, "I miss that unvarnished, powerful and abusive warlord we know and love."
Blackarachnia tsked, shaking her head in mock pity. "Of course you boys miss him." she snapped, "But how are we going to get him back to the way he was? Between you, me and the light post, he's already starting to just plain creep me out."
Lugnut was resolute with whatever Megatron would be pleased with. He knew that his master would not be too thrilled to know that he was ... a good Decepticon. So he would do whatever it took to get his real self back to normal.
"What about Megatron's human pet?" Lugnut suggested. "Maybe he can help."
Before anyone could react, Megatron hovered behind Blitzwing and gave him a brutal, powerful hug that nearly cracked his back armor out. "Hello, old friend!" he gushed, his baritone voice not fitting on such words. "I love you like my brother, have I told you that?"
Blitzwing grew uncomfortable with this. "Y ... Yes, sir, you just did." he stammered.
"Tell me you love me, Blitzwing. I certainly love you."
Blitzwing stared at the others helplessly and they shrugged, not sure what else to do for him. He forced the words out painfully. "I love you too, sir ... " he griped.
Blackarachnia stuck out her glossa in disgust, but said nothing at first. He stepped up finally, getting an idea. "Hey, um...friend..." she said, "How about we have a little ... get together at Sumdac tower?" She spoke evenly, hoping Megatron would get it.
"Really?" Megatron said, "That sounds delightful. We should go right now."
They all quickly made haste out into the world, with Megatron telling all of his friends how much he liked them.
"I love you, Blackarachnia!" he gushed.
"Yeah Yeah ditto. Let's just do this." she muttered, her spider legs gripping the wall tightly.
O
But much to their disdain, Professor Sumdac would not do what they wanted. He sat stubbornly, arms folded across his chubby chest.
"I shall do no such thing for you!" he spat. His voice softened with a smile. "Besides, this new Megatron repaired my lab."
They all looked back to see Megatron busy at work, building and cleaning up the mess around them. He smiled politely.
"Oh for the love of Megatron!" Lugnut thundered, "We need him back!"
"No." Professor Sumdac said, defiant to the end.
Lugnut looked at Blitzwing expectantly. "Blitzwing?"
The jet raised a large picture of Sari in a frame and smashed his fist into it, making his point quite vividly. Professor Sumdac gasped and trembled, kneeling before them. He did not want to see his only daughter killed because of this.
"Alright, I will try and fix him!"
The Decepticons gathered around Professor Sumdac, watching him work on Megatron's damaged head. Lugnut patted his arm weapon menacingly, making sure to keep the human in line if he decided to try anything stupid this time.
"Ahh, here is the problem!"
Their attentions were immediately piqued and they leaned forward, spotting the torn wires. Sumdac shook his head. "His personality mainframe was damaged, but it's not as bad as you think." he told them.
"Then fix it at once!" Lugnut commanded.
Sumdac turned to him, shrugging and putting his tools down. "I have done all I can." he told them, "He needs something that would instantly jar his memory. That will bring him back."
Blackarachnia chuckled and watched Megatron slowly come back online. "Thanks a lot, doc." she sneered, "You helped the enemies of your world yet again."
O
The Decepticons took their trip back toward base, helping Megatron along.
"I wonder what could be strong enough to jar Megatron back to reality." Lugnut said.
Blackarachia had hitched a ride with Blitzwing and she looked down. "Uh - oh, I have an idea." she muttered, pointing.
They looked down long enough to see Starscream and Megatron below, talking ... civil? This was new of course. They flew down to find the traitor smooth talking Megatron with a grin.
"Ahh, that pains me to hear, great one." he hissed, "But it's good to see you are still unharmed."
Megatron chuckled softly. "Ahh, no harm, indeed, friend." he said.
Lugnut started to go forward, but Blitzwing stopped him. "Wait a minute, Lugnut; let's see if this works." he whispered.
The massive hulk nodded once and they all stood, watching.
"We are good friends indeed." Starscream purred. "I am your best friend in the world."
Megatron grinned widely. "And YOU are my favorite bot in the world, Starscream."
Starscream looked surprised. "I am?"
"Well, of course, I thought you knew that." Megatron teased, putting an arm around him in a playful hug. It was starting to make the jet nervous now. "You're my best friend ever!"
Starscream flinched in disgust at this. "B .. but ... " he grunted, "I am your best friend!"
For a moment, Megatron's head fizzled once and his old voice returned temporarily. It was working. "Excuse me?" he said, in his familiar sotto voice, "Wat was that?"
Starscream peeked one optic out at him meekly. "I said, I am your best friend!"
Megatron grinned playfully again. "But that's absolutely impossible, dear Starscream! I said it first, you silly jet!" he gushed.
The Decepticons listened to this in macabre amusement as the two argued back and forth. This would work, they knew.
"He likes you so much, that he set a detonator on your body and sentenced you to 50 million stellar cycles of slavery and solitude!" Lugnut hissed.
Megatron suddenly froze and he clenched his teeth, sparks flying around his neck. His fury and anger returned. "WHAT?" he thundered.
Starscream knew he was done for now. "Uh - oh ... " he said, meekly.
Megatron drew back and angry fist. "Well, do you want to know what I despise more than Autobots and the entire slagging universe?" he raged. "I REALLY DESPISE YOU, STARSCREAM!" He drew his fist back and brought a deadly right hook up, punching Starscream in the jaw, sending the Harrier jet sailing through the air with a fierce scream.
O
Megatron was disgusted when Lugnut told him of what had happened.
"I cannot believe I was ... nice." he hissed, disgusted.
Much later, Starscream and his two clones had been locked together in a truly nutty way with stasis cuffs. They looked mildly uncomfortable.
"So, once again the day ends with-" the Gold Starscream began.
"With the three of us stuck together in some ridiculous way - " Starscream snapped, cuffed by his ankles and wrists. He raised a mocking optic ridge and stared down at the others. "oh but wait! We have a guest with us tonight!"
Swindle had been cuffed up the side of the Seekers. His arms folded with annoyance. "Boy oh boy, how I ever end up here?" he muttered, talking to himself and annoying the Seekers. "If I wasn't so scared of turning into a cube of junk, I'd still be in Detroit."
Starscream grumbled with annoyance, looking down at his two clones. "Could someone scrape this guy off my foot? Please." he muttered.
THE END
O
Note-God I know what you're thinking...Yeah, it was cheesy, but hey, an idea. And like ideas, they should be put down. Hehe, please don't kill me. Quick and painless, as I like to call them. Like I said, random silliness.
