Till Death Do Us Part

Note: This story, I was writing when I wrote A New Life Together. It had a totally different storyline then the one that I posted on Fanfiction. So if some stuff comes up that you don't remember happening, just ask me and I'll explain it to you either in e-mail or somewhere else. Thanks allot.

[1 Year Earlier]

Bosco walked into the apartment after work. He stopped when he saw that the room had a soft glow to it. His head rose and he looked around. The music was playing softly in the background. The room was lit with about seventy-five red and white candles. It made a soft glow of Faith who was sitting in a chair at the other side of the room. She had a red rose in her hand. She looked up at him and slowly rose to her feet. She was wearing a white lacy bra and it had little feathers on it. She had a matching robe and thong. Her hair was done and off her shoulders. She grinned not showing teeth then looked down and unhurriedly walked over to him. Bosco took his hat off and ran his hand through his short hair. She stood in front of him and looked up in his eyes. He put his hand on her hip and her hand was on his cheek. He smiled then leaned down and kissed her.

[Present] Thursday - 1:06a.m

Bosco was pacing, back and forth, in the waiting room of Angel of Mercy Hospital in New York City. He was mumbling something but no one could understand what he was saying because he was talking too fast. Kim was sitting with her arms wrapped around her legs and head on her knees in a chair. Jimmy was sitting next to her with his arm around her. he was rubbing her back as she cried on his shoulder. Alex had called Davis who called Sully and they were both there. Sully was sitting next to Maggie who had accompanied him. Davis was sitting next to Alex as she shed some tears. Davis had also called allot of the guys from the Precinct and they were there.

DK was sitting next to Walsh and looking down the hall then at his watch. Some other firefighters and paramedics had come and they had their heads down looking at the ground. They were thinking about what life would be like without Faith or this baby that Bosco wanted for so long. Doc was sitting next to Carlos and they were sipping on their coffees. Rose and Mikey were leaning up against the wall looking at Bosco as he paced back and forth. Ramona was sitting alone, looking down the hall, waiting for a doctor to come and tell her that her baby girl was Ok.

Bosco started pacing slowly. No word meant good things. He stopped finally and sat between DK and Jimmy. Both of them patted his back softly as he looked at the ground crying. No word on the baby either. His knees began bouncing up and down because he was trying to make himself feel better. What would life be like without his Faith? No one there to tell you that she loves you. He thought to himself as he looked at his wedding band. He would never love again.

Emily and Charlie would have to either live with Fred or Ramona and Jack. Bosco would stay in that apartment by himself. Everyday crying and wishing Faith would come back to him. Probably commit suicide by the first week. He couldn't live without his sunshine by his side all the time.

Sarah Morales sighed and walked down the hall. She ran her hand through her hair. She was tired. She was supposed to be off at 12 but wasn't giving up on Faith and Bosco's baby. She walked in the waiting room and everyone stood up looking at her. Especially Bosco. She gazed at him and could tell that he had been crying allot that night. She took a deep breath. It's a girl."

Everybody let out a sigh and looked at Bosco as more tears threatened their way down his face. "You can come and see her if you want Bos. I must warn you though, she doesn't look good." He nodded and wiped his tears away then followed her down the hall to the Neonatal ICU doors.

The nurse in the NICU had him put some scrubs on for medical reasons. He walked in and there were already five babies inside. All had different problems but one thing in common. They were all itty-bitty babies. Bosco walked around the small incubators to where it said 'Boscorelli baby girl'. He walked over and peered inside. The baby was small and had a breathing tube coming out of her nose connecting to a ventilator. Then she had a feeding tube going in her mouth to her stomach. A cardiorespiratory monitor leads were on her chest, measuring her heart weight and breathing. A temperature probe on her left side. Then she had an umbilical catheter for fluid, medication and for drawing blood. Then a plus oximeter probe for measuring oxygen saturation.

Bosco looked down at his tiny baby girl. A tear fell down his cheek. She looked about the size of his hand. He glanced at the card on her crib which read, 'Baby Girl Boscorelli. 3lbs 1oz. 9in."

He sat down on a chair that was next to the baby and gazed at her. She had her mouth open and so were her eyes. She couldn't see anything really though. She was turning her head around and trying to figure out something. Bosco smiled and leaned in when she met his gaze. She didn't move her head. She just stared in his direction like she knew he was there. She had some of dark brown hair and her eyes were gray. Her body was the exact size of his whole palm.

The baby looked like him allot, but smaller and she was a girl. He put his hand through the hole they had and touched her leg. She jumped at his touch and her monitor shot up quickly then went back down. He took his hand out and stuck it in another hole that was next to her hand and held it.

"I love you so much baby." He spoke softly and she was still looking in his direction. He sniffled and spoke again. "Your mom and I couldn't wait till you got here. Oh forgot, I'm your daddy." He looked at her hand as it gently squeezed his finger. "Your mom isn't doing so good. Actually I don't know how she's doing at all. But I do know that she's fighting on that table so she can see you and raise you to be strong like she is." He grinned and a tear rolled down his cheek, slowly.

"She loves you so much. She loved everytime you kicked or hick-upped." He smiled a little. "I remember the first time that I felt you kick. I was in the hospital for being shot in the stomach. Anyway, mommy told me you were kicking so I lifted my weak hand up and touched her tummy and there you were moving around." He looked at her face as she continued to stare in his direction. "I don't know what we'll do without her. But I promise you that I will take care of you and teach you everything about your beautiful and wonderful mommy." Many tears fell down his face.

"The way she used to do her job as a good cop, a great mom and a wonderful wife. All at the same time and she never complained about giving it all up and leaving. She always said how she loved being a mom." He paused and wiped some of his tears away. "You know what she's like from the inside, but from the outside. She's the most beautiful woman in the whole world."

A nurse came in the room and walked over to where he was sitting. "Excuse me Mr. Boscorelli, I'm sorry but we have time limits on the NICU units. You can come back later." She said softly.

"All right." He took his hand out of the hole and stood up. Bosco walked out of his daughter's sight. She started crying when she couldn't hear, feel or see him anymore.

Bosco turned around and looked at his crying baby as she shook. He turned around and walked out of the doors crying himself. He walked into the waiting room and took off the scrubs slowly.

Ramona turned around and saw him first. "Oh Maurice, how is she doing?" She asked impatiently as everyone stood behind her and looked at him.

"She's all right I guess. She weighs 3 pounds and 1 ounce.

"What does she looked like?" Rose asked sitting next to him.

"I don't know ma. A baby." He ran his hand over his face and sighed. "She's so tiny and she had her eyes open, looking at me and she was squeezing my finger." He cried.

"She sounds so precious." Kim said with a sigh. "What's her name?"

"Not sure yet." He answered glancing at his younger brother. If Faith did live, then he was gonna let her pick. And if she died then he'd name the baby after her mother.

Thursday-4:57a.m

Bosco was sitting in the waiting room and thinking about his baby and Faith. He looked up at the ceiling and sight. "God, I know you and me haven't been the closest people but I'm asking you a favor. My wife Faith, you know her. I really want her to live so she can see the precious, beautiful baby girl that we created together. I can't live without her. Please bring her back to me. I need her and so does this baby God. Thanks." He prayed softly to himself and opened his eyes. He looked at the ground and put his head in his hands. "Please answer my prayers God." He said.

Tell me it's real

The feelin' that we feel

Tell me that it's real

Don't let love come just, to pass us by

Try, is all we have to do

It's up yo me and you

To make this special love, last forever more......

The doctor came down the hall and took his surgery cap off. He asked a nurse where to find them then walked into the waiting room and everyone stood up, looking at his face. It had no expression. That scared Bosco. If he couldn't read his face then what was he hanging on to?

"Mr. Boscorelli." The doctor said softly.

"That's me." Bosco said stepping forward.

"You wanna step in a quiet room and talk?"

"No you can say whatever in front of them."

He nodded slowly. "I'm so sorry. We lost her."

Bosco broke down in tears. His whole world was shattered. She was gone. His Faith. His beautiful, loving, caring Faith was gone. His wife, his everything was gone. No more saying goodnight and kissing her anymore. He would never get to hear her say anything to him. No more of her million dollar smiles that she flashed at him. He would never hear her say; 'I love you baby' or 'Maurice you're so cute'. He would never get to touch her soft skin or hear her breathe.

Faith would never get to see that beautiful baby girl that her and Bosco made. She would never get to hear her first words or see her first step. Never see Emily and Charlie anymore.

Baby you to me that you love me

And you'd never leave my side

To the bitter end, through the thick and thin

You promise me baby that you wasn't goin' anywhere

Baby keep it real, let me know just how you feel

Rose walked over to her son and put him in her arms. He wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her shirt crying frenziedly. His knee's weakened and he slowly fell to the floor. Rose was rocking him back and forth rubbing his back and stroking his short hair. Mikey had his head on a wall looking down at the ground, blubbering. Kim was in Jimmy's shirt crying aloud. He had tears running down his face too, stroking her hair. Carlos was standing shaking his head as a single tear fell. Doc was hugging Romona as she cried in pain. The ten officers that were there shook their heads in disbelief and walked down the hall. Davis was holding his girlfriend as she cried they were both shaking and both their heads were buried in the other's shoulder. Sully was holding Maggie as she cried. He had tears in his eye's looking at Bosco feeling sorry for him and that baby and Faith's two other kids. DK and Walsh were staring at the ground, non-emotional.

Tell me it's real

The feelin' that we feel

Tell me that it's real

Don't let love come just, to pass us by

Try, is all we have to do

It's up to me and you

To make this special love, last forever

"It'll be all right my baby." Rose whispered in her son's ear. She knew he wouldn't believe her. Faith was Maurice's everything. She saw it everytime he looked at her and heard it everytime he talked to her. She was a great mother to those two poor kids Emily and Charlie. She loved Faith very much cause a part of her changed Rose. She used to be a good for nothing mother who drank and never really talked to her kids.

I can't explain the way you made me feel

Everytime that you told me that you loved me

And you know you did, too many times

Just when I thought that love could never be apart of me

That's when you came along, and showed me happiness

Baby you are the best

I think you are different from the rest

And I really love ya

But when Faith came into her son's life and they were involved. The way Faith treated Maurice got her thinking that maybe if she treated him with some respect and cared for him he would be allot happier and he was. Mikey looked at his brother. He shook his head and thought about the last time he saw and talked to Faith. It was the other day when she walked over to his apartment and they had a nice 'older sister little brother' talk.

Tell me it's real

The feelin' that we feel

Tell me that it's real

Don't let love come just, to pass us by

Try, is all we have to do

It's up to me and you

To make this special love, last forever more

He never really got to have one of those with Mo. He either never had time or was mad at him for selling drugs and put him in jail. The last thing she said to him was 'You're a good person Mikey. Tell yourself that everyday and you'll be Ok.' He loved Faith as a sister, person, and most of all. A friend.

Tell me it's real

This feeling that I feel

Tell me it's real

For you're love

I would do anything

Ramona's head was buried in Doc's shirt. She had her hands gripped around his back. Her baby girl was gone, no more Faith. She was the one who tried to stop the fighting between her and Jack.

Tell me it's real

The fellin' that we feel (do you really care)

Tell me it's real

(you promised that you'd never leave my side)

Don't let love come just, pass us by

(you promised that you'd always be there)

Yeah she never got along with her daughter like most mothers did but it still was her first born and she loved her. She pulled away and put her chin on his shoulder and looked at Maurice as he held his mother crying.

Try, is all we have to do

(mama told me told me so, boy you just don't know anything about love)

It's up to me and you

To make this special love last forever more

(and you and I were meant to be, and you would know I was sure by the end of this song)

How could this have happened? She was just talking on the phone with her that previous morning about delivery. Faith was scared that something bad might happen to the baby. But it was her baby girl instead that died.

Thursday-5:39a.m

Fred hung the phone up and looked down the hall where his kids were asleep. He slowly walked down the hallway and opened the door to where the kids were. He walked over to their bed and looked at their faces. "Emily, Charlie wake up." He nudged both their shoulders.

Emily sat up and looked at her father. "Oh my gosh what time is it?" She rubbed her eyes and yawned.

"What's wrong dad?" Charlie asked and sat up next to his sister.

Fred looked down at the floor then back at his kids. "Gramma Mitchell just called from the hospital."

"Did mom have the baby?" Charlie asked sounding excited and anxious.

"Yeah your mom had the baby." He said sadly.

"Well let's go see them." Emily said and got out of the bed. She looked back at her father and saw he had his head down. "What's wrong dad?"

"Guys your mom...she.... She died." He said softly.

Emily looked at him and shook her head. "No, no she can't die." Still shaking her head.

"I'm sorry Em, come here." He stood up and walked towards her.

"No don't touch me! Mom didn't die!"

Charlie sat on the bed with tears running down his face. He put his head in his hands and wept.

Thursday-6:51a.m

Bosco sat in the waiting room looking at the ground. His eye's were puffy and red and still had lonely tears coming down his cheeks. Rose was sitting next to her sons. Mikey was sitting on the right of her with his head on her shoulder looking off in the distance.

I get so lonely
Can't let just anybody hold me
You are the one that lives in me, my dear
Want no one but you

Bosco had his head on her other shoulder. She was rubbing both their foreheads. Rose knew there was nothing she could say or do that would make Bosco feel better. But she hated seeing him this sad.

Sittin here with my tears
All alone with my fears
I'm wonderin if I have to do
Withoutcha
But there's no reason why

Emily busted through the doors at the end of the hall she ran down and into the waiting room. "Bosco." She said her voice full of sadness and sorrow.

I feel asleep late last night
Cryin like a newborn child
Holdin myself close
Pretendin my arms are yours
I want no one but you

He looked up and saw her standing there. She looked so small and lost, she had been crying. Charlie and Fred walked up behind her and looked at him.

I get so lonely
Can't let just anybody hold me
You are the one that lives in me, my dear
Want no one but you

Bosco stood up and walked towards her. She ran over to him and hugged him crying hysterically. He rubbed her head and looked at Charlie as he cried too.

I still remember to the day
In fact is was a 3rd Monday
You came along to be the one for me
Now I'm alone

"Why'd she have to die?" Emily asked with her head buried in his shirt. He looked down at her then a tear ran down his face.

Sittin here by the phone
Call and say that you're okay
So that I'll have the chance
To beg you to stay
I want no one but you

Fred whispered something in Charlie's ear then walked down the hallway. Charlie walked slowly over to Rose and Mikey then sat next to her and hugged her. She put her hand on the back of his head and rocked him back and forth.

Gonna break it down
Break it down, break it down
Gotta break it down
Break it down, break it down
Whoa

Sully and Maggie looked over at the two kids and shook their heads. How could this happen to two young sweet kids like them? Faith was just teaching Emily about life and getting a job. They weren't even done being raised and their mother died. Davis and Alex thought the same thing so did everybody else.

You know
That I know
That I get so lonely thinking of you
Oh-hooh
Noowhoahooo. . .

~THOUGHTS ABOUT A GOOD FRIEND~

I remember when Faith and I were sitting on the steps behind the Precinct. I had just blown up on Sully for seeing my mom and said some things I shouldn't have. She told me that if Maggie, my mom, was happy then to let her be. I believed her, ever since my dad was killed she's kinda had something lost inside her, but when she started seeing Sully that lost piece of her has come back. Faith was the first person I told when I was gonna ask Alex to marry me. Faith was a good cop, great mother, and an excellent friend. She will be sadly missed. Tyrone Davis Jr.

It's over and done but the heartache lives on inside

And who's the one you're clinging to instead of me tonight?

And where are you now, now that I need you?

Tears on my pillow wherever you go

I'll cry me a river that leads to your ocean

You never see me fall apart

In the words of a broken heart

Me and Faith had some great times together. She always had a smile on her face when it was the right time. She's always been like a sister to me, giving me advice on stuff. Everytime I saw Faith either doing her job, talking to her kids, or just standing there looking around I felt happy. Her good attitude would light up a room and turn heads. I miss Faith so much. I wish she could come back and give me some advice on how to deal with her death. ~Alexandra Taylor

It's just emotion that's taken me over

Caught up in sorrow, lost in my soul

But if you don't come back

Come home to me darling

Don't you know there's nobody left in this world to hold me tight

Don't cha know there's nobody left in this wordl to kiss goodnight

Goodnight, goodnight

Faith was one of the nicest people I met. She was the best cop out there. Every call she answered she made it seem that it was important even if it wasn't. She had the best attitude about things. She treated everybody around her with respect and tried to listen to what everybody said. She was tuff at times but fair, that's what I liked about her the most. ~John Sullivan

I'm there at your side

I'm part of all the things you are

But you've got a part of someone else

You've got to find your shining star

And where are you now, now that I need you?

Tears on my pillow wherever you go

I'll cry me a river that leads to your ocean

You never see me fall apart

In the words of a broken heart

Faith. Always wanted to know if I was having a good time. She had the nicest smile. The thing good about her is she was always using it. She always made things fun, even when we were snowed in, in her and Bosco's apartment. She tried to get us all to go outside but all the guys said no. We finally went after about three seconds after they left. She threw a snowball at me and it hit my head. I got her back and I still laugh about that till this day. I miss her. ~Carlos Nieto

It's just emotion that's taken me over

Caught up in sorrow, lost in my soul

But if you don't come back

Come home to me darling

Don't you know there's nobody left in this world to hold me tight

Nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight

Goodnight, goodnight

The one bad memory that I had of Faith is when she got raped. It tore me apart, seeing her lay there in her own blood crying. Things were different between us after that. I kissed her one time and she pushed me away and her and Bosco threatened my life. Then I accidentally tripped her and she had to get surgery to close the wound. After all this happened we got closer. I hate talking about her in the past tense. I wish she were here. James Doherty

And where are you now, now that I need you?

Tears on my pillow wherever you go

I'll cry me a river that leads to your ocean

You never see me fall apart

I'n the words of a broken heart

Me and Faith weren't that close. We shared some laughs and sad times but we never really sat down and talked about stuff like the others. When she was sad I rubbed her back. The only thing I loved seeing about her was that look she gave me before she laughed. She was a good person. ~Monte Parker

It's just emotion that's taken me over

Caught up in sorrow, lost in my soul

(Don't you know I'm lost without you baby)

But if you don't come back

Come home to me darling

Faith was my sister. We talked about everything together. Men, kids, clothes and everything. She was the sweetest cop I've ever met. I loved seeing her with Bosco. They were so cute, she always called him 'babe' and it was so adorable. When she asked me to be her maid of honor I freaked. Jumping up and down screaming. Well not really but I was pretty hype. I watched her get married to Bosco and them grow on each other as husband and wife. It was a great thing to see, except when they fought. It was like World War 3 through 6, but after it was over they loved each other more. I'm gonna miss Faith so much. ~Kimberly Zambarno

Nobody left in this world to hold me tight (Nobody to hold me)

Nobody left in this world to kiss goodnight (Nobody to kiss me)

Goodnight, goodnight

~A Wonderful Mother~

I hate the thought of my mother dead. Everything was going just right and then she has to die. I cry everyday thinking I will never get to talk to her again about stuff.

You taught me everything,
And everything you've given me, I'll always keep it inside.
You're the driving force in my life, yeah.
There isn't anything or anyone that I can be,
And it just wouldn't feel right,
If I didn't have you by my side.
You were there for me to love and care for me,
When skies were grey.
Whenever I was down,
You were always there to comfort me.
And no one else can be what you have been to me,
You'll always be,
You will always be the girl in my life for all times.

She was my mom, the one who took care of me all those years and now she's gone. We had allot of good times together after the assault. When Charlie and I moved in with her and Bosco it brought us closer.

Mama, Mama you know I love you,
(Oh, you know I love you),
Mama, Mama you're the queen of my heart.
Your love is like tears from the stars.
Mama, I just want you to know,
Lovin' you is like food to my soul.

Kinda weird how something that brutal can bring a mother and daughter close. She was always there. I love her so much. I hope to see her soon. I miss her so much. ~Emily Yokas

You're always down for me,
Have always been around for me,
Even when I was bad.
You showed me right from my wrong,
(Yes you did).
And you took up for me,
When everyone was downin' me,
You always did understand,
You gave me strength to go on.
There was so many times,
Looking back when I was so afraid.
And then you come to me and say to me,
I can face anything.
And no one else can do,
What you have done for me.
You'll always be,
You will always be the girl in my life.

When my dad told us mom died, I was shocked. At first I thought I heard it wrong then saw Emily's face as she cried and knew it was true. I cry everyday. Don't sleep at night. Why sleep if you don't wanna be there the next morning?

Mama, Mama you know I love you,
(Oh, you know I love you),
Mama, Mama you're the queen of my heart.
Your love is like tears from the stars.
Mama, I just want you to know,
Lovin' you is like food to my soul.

The last time I saw my mom was that morning and she kissed my cheek and told me she loved me. I'm glad I said I loved her too. Bosco is always sad too. We go over there sometimes.

Never gonna go a day without you.
Fills me up just thinking about you.
I'll never go a day without my Mama.

He sits on the couch with the baby close to him staring at her. She looks like mom. I wish I could talk to her one last time and tell her I love her. Mom will always be in my heart. ~Charles Yokas

~A Perfect Wife~

Faith was my best friend. Still is, but I can't tell her that anymore. I love her so much. I told her that everyday and she told me the same. Every memory of her is good. I see pictures of her around the apartment smiling. It makes me sad that I won't be able to see her smile again. I remember the first day we started dating. That fire and I almost ran in the building but she stopped me. She saved my life cause inside the building blew up a few seconds after that. I never thanked her. I sit in the lonely apartment, wishing she would come out of the bathroom or kitchen but she doesn't. Why did she have to be ripped from me? I look at the baby in my arms. She has Faith's facial features. She never even got to meet her, didn't even know the sex or what she looked like. She would have loved her so much.

Come stop your crying
It will be all right
Just take my hand Hold it tight
I will protect you
from all around you
I will be here
Don't you cry


For one so small,
you seem so strong
My arms will hold you,
keep you safe and warm
This bond between us
Can't be broken
I will be here
Don't you cry

Faith's mom came over the other day and took her clothes and shoes. I kept everything else. It's just me and Andrea Faith Marie Boscorelli now. Emily and Charlie are living with their grandparents. They come by every now and then to visit. It's so hard cause before they leave they cry. So after they shut the door I cry. Ma comes by to see us everyday. She brings me a piece of fruit and Andrea some formula. She's been so great to me at this time. I really haven't spoken to Davis and them. Kim calls me everyday to see how I'm doin' and if I need anything. I say the same thing. 'Thanks Kim but I'm fine.' I can tell she cry's everytime she hangs up cause her last sentence is shaky.

'Cause you'll be in my heart
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on
Now and forever more
You'll be in my heart
No matter what they say
You'll be here in my heart, always

Every night before me and Andrea go to bed I look at a picture I took of Faith. She has a button up blouse and the last four are undone and she has her belly showing. She was eight months pregnant when I took it. She was so beautiful when she was pregnant. Any time of the day she was beautiful. I never sleep just lay in the bed running my hand up and down Andrea's back. She sleeps in the bed with me cause I don't wanna be alone. She's like my sunshine. I talk to her everyday and she listens but doesn't talk back. That's exactly what I want. I hate answering questions. She just lies there and looks at me. The other day she started focusing her eye's a bit. So now when I talk she looks directly in my eyes. I don't know what I'm gonna do when I have to go back to work. It's gonna be too hard to leave her, but Lieu said I could switch over to the 7 in the morning to 3 in the afternoon shift.

Why can't they understand
the way we feel
They just don't trust
what they can't explain
I know we're different but,
deep inside us
We're not that different at all

Some nights when Andrea is snoring, I cry not really just tears run down my cheeks. I don't and can't believe my wife is gone. We were only married for not even a year. I'll never get to celebrate our first anniversary with her. I think of so many things I'm never gonna get to do with her. Never gonna hold her close when she cries. Never kiss her lips when we see each other. I want to so bad but I will never be able to say that I love her and she can't say that to me either. It's not fair how life works. I'm glad I have my baby girl here with me but I want my wife too.

And you'll be in my heart
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on
Now and forever more
Don't listen to them
'Cause what do they know
We need each other,
to have, to hold
They'll see in time
I know

Hardest day of my life was Faith's funeral. I couldn't stop the tears from coming. I watched my wife's casket get lowered into the ground. It was the hardest thing ever. Emily and Charlie were sitting to my right. Romona was to my left. She held onto my hand the whole time. Ma was standing behind me with her hand on my shoulder. Emily cried the whole time; it was like she couldn't stop. She got up and ran when they started throwing the dirt on Faith's casket. I wanted to get up and run after her but something kept me there. Fred did instead. Charlie looked at me with those big puffy brown eye's then looked down at the ground. He was still a little boy. He needed his mother there to teach him new things about life and general stuff.

When destiny calls you
You must be strong
I may not be with you
But you've got to hold on
They'll see in time
I know
We'll show them together

About once a week I take Andrea to see Faith's headstone. It reads 'Faith Marie Boscorelli December 15, 1966 - February 22, 2003 Loving Mother, Wife, and Officer'. I take flowers up to her every time. She always loved white roses so I get those for special occasions. Other times I get her Lily's. She liked them too. I stand there holding Andrea's carseat in one hand and looking at Faith's grave. I walk away. Walking slow looking down at my baby. 'It's just us now.' I say everytime. I put her in the back seat then glance over at Faith's grave again. Blow a kiss then drive away. I love you Faith and your husband'll always remember you. ~Maurice Boscorelli

'Cause you'll be in my heart
Yes, you'll be in my heart
From this day on,
Now and forever more
Oh, you'll be in my heart
No matter what they say
You'll be in my heart, always
Always

~ME~

I didn't want to die. I still had Emily and Charlie to raise. I had that baby that was just born to take care of and love. I had a husband who was counting on me to say 'I love you'. I had friends that I never said good bye to and family. I still had so many things to take care of. I had to get Maurice and his father to talk to one another. I had to teach Emily that life is tricky and train her for it. My baby boy Charlie, needed me to kiss him goodnight and now I couldn't give him that.

I hope life won't be hard without me. I wish that Maurice would stay in touch with Charlie and Emily. Then they will stay close with their baby sister. I want them to get together and talk about me without any tears. Maybe a few. But tears of when I did stuff. Talk about how I used to do things and say. I want so many things right now but my time is running out. I can hear Bobby from heaven telling me that I'm coming soon. I nod my head but I had to go somewhere first.

I lost so much blood then my heart beat was getting slower then it stopped. The doctors tried to get me back but I was already gone. They sew and clean me up. I walk down the hall with the doctor after he tried about a thousand times to get me back. He steps in the waiting room and everybody looks at him. He says he's so sorry and Maurice breaks into tears along with everybody else. Everyone is crying because of me. Rose is holding her son, Jimmy is holding Kim, Doc is holding my mom, and Ty and Alex are weeping. I want to reach out and touch my husband but I can't.

Maurice sitting in the living room on the couch our baby is in his arms. He stands up and looks at the baby then he walks in the bedroom and lays her on her stomach in the bed. He looks at a picture of me when I was pregnant. He lies under the covers next to her. A tear starts to fall down his cheek. 'Don't cry babe. I'm all right now. Go to sleep. I'll always be with you when you need me. Take care of our baby. Your doing a great job.' I look up in the sky as the heavens open and a hand reaches out for me. 'I love you Maurice. I'll be watching over you for now and forever.' I take God's hand and walk with him up to heaven. ~ Faith Boscorelli