Title: All I want
Series: One tree hill
Character POV: Clay
Pairing: Sarah/clay
All I want for Christmas is my baby.
He hates Christmas. He hates the lights and the happiness. He hates the snow that falls from the sky. He hates the decorations. He doesn't get a Christmas tree. He's probably the only one in tree hill that has no decorations. He doesn't care either.
Sarah had loved Christmas.
She had loved everything about the season. Every single thing. He had loved watching her. She had looked so happy then. He hates Christmas. Because everything around him reminds him of her. He put up a tree that first Christmas without her. It was horrible. He'd broken down every time he tried unpacking the decorations. In the end he had just let it stand there. No lights. No decorations.
It just stood there. Bare. Lifeless. Just like Sarah. And him.
He tries to escape it. But it's all around him. He watches as Hayley and Nathan and Jamie decorate their tree. And he just stands there. He can't do it. He can't because all he sees is nothing. The realization that he's all alone. Jamie writes a letter to Santa. Filled with things he wants. Toys and even more toys. All children believe in Santa.
He had loved Christmas. Just like Sarah. He had believed in Santa.
If Santa existed. If he believed in Santa he would know what to ask for. If she was a better man he might ask for world peace or something. But he doesn't want that. A selfless man would ask for Nathan and Hayley to have a lot of luck with their careers. But he doesn't ask that either.
Sarah used to write a letter.
She didn't believe in it anymore of course. But she loved writing it nevertheless. She had always made him write one as well. They had always come out as extremely stupid letters. But they had fun writing them and it's all that really matters. He tried writing one that first Christmas. He had tried many things that year. He had ended up crying on the couch. The same song playing in the background. Merry Christmas.
He wrote one this year as well. But only because Jamie made them.
He could have asked for many things. But in the end he only wants one thing. All I want for Christmas, he thinks, is Sarah back. He only wants one thing. But even if Santa were real he would never be able to grand that wish.
All I want for Christmas…Santa can you hear me?
