"I can take care of myself." They were words that Karane repeated often, during her first pregnancy. Words that annoyed Pipit endlessly, because they both knew she was only halfway right. During the first months she was perfectly capable of suffering through cramps and nausea on her own. She didn't need someone to help. She didn't need someone to hold her hair back when she was ill, or to trace hearts over her relatively flat stomach, or to tell her she was beautiful.
But he did it anyway, with the words "Don't be shy." Then she would argue with him on if she was really just shy to ask for help or if she had pride that made her decline it. The same story went on throughout the next coming months. He would rub away pains in her arms, legs, or stomach even and she would muttered "I can take care of myself" as if that might actually stop her husband from caring. And he would repeat the same words "Don't be shy."
And then she was born. Karane had been out of work for quite some time, and would likely still be out of work until the baby was old enough to not depend entirely on her. It fascinated Pipit that this little baby was his. Not because he doubted Karane's faithfulness—he was 100% sure this baby was his daughter—but because she seemed to be so perfect. In his eyes, he'd never seen a more beautiful girl.
Pipit had to continue working, of course. Had to stay up all night on the patrols he took, and then he came home. He quickly realized his only time with his daughter would be during the day time, so he taught himself to stay up in the day time too. He convinced himself he would sleep when she took naps.
Of course then, the first time she fell asleep in his arms and he had the perfect opportunity to sleep, it occurred to him that she was still an infant. She was still at an age where she could just die for no reason. Her little lung would just forget to breathe.
What if she forgot to breathe? He couldn't risk that… so he stayed awake to watch her sleep, to watch the rise and fall of the baby's chest and to rock her against himself softly.
It only took about three days operating on little to no sleep before he found himself feeling dizzy all the time. It was evident in the way he walked, and in his droopy eyes, and finally his wife pulled the child from his arms one morning and said "Go to sleep."
"I'm fine." Was his response, but she glared at him.
"If you don't sleep you'll get sick—if you're sick you won't be allowed to hold her. Then what will you do with yourself? I'd have to take care of two babies!"
He scoffed at the words. She had a point, and he would be going to sleep, but he felt the need to say "I can take care of myself, Rane."
"Oh? Well don't be so 'shy'."
