Disclaimer: All characters, places, storylines… pretty much everything but my elaborations on Ron and Hermione belong to the almighty Jo Rowling. I didn't feel comfortable rewriting direct quotes, so any quoted dialogue comes from The Half-Blood Prince and The Deathly Hallows.
Chapter 1: Triumph and Defeat
We won… Ron thought slowly in disbelief. He barely felt the hearty claps of congratulations on his back nor did he entirely hear the whoops and shrieks of jubilation from his excited teammates. Was all of this because of Felix Felicis? He snapped out of his musings long enough to hear Dean announce a celebration party in the Gryffindor common room. He grinned from ear to ear and smiled even more after seeing the proud, delighted look on his best friend's bespectacled face.
But the excitement didn't last for long. A very upset, disapproving Hermione suddenly barged into the changing room. Ron couldn't help but notice how lovely she looked even though her windblown hair was unkempt, her face was rosy pink from the cold, and she was quite obviously out of breath. He didn't know why another bloke hadn't claimed her for himself yet.
Oh yeah… his anger surfaced. Why did she have to go and snog Viktor Krum? he thought for the hundredth time since his argument with Ginny some days before. That…that git! his bitterness slowly souring his facial expression.
"I want a word with you, Harry," Hermione huffed. "You shouldn't have done it. You heard Slughorn, it's illegal."
An indignant Ron quickly spat, "What are you doing to do, turn us in?"
Harry turned away from the pair of them and Ron could have sworn he heard a suppressed chuckle. "What are you two talking about?" he asked.
All at once, the pink color of frustration spread to Hermione's face as she shrieked, "You know perfectly well what we're talking about! You spiked Ron's juice with lucky potion at breakfast! Felix Felicis!"
Feigning ignorance, Harry slyly replied, "No I didn't."
"Yes you did, Harry and that's why everything went right, there were Slytherin players missing and Ron saved everything!"
"I didn't put it in!" Harry insisted, reaching into his robes to display the still-sealed tiny bottle of Felix Felicis. "I wanted Ron to think I'd done it, so I faked it when I knew you were looking. You saved everything because you felt lucky. You did it all yourself," he grinned at Ron.
That can't have been just me. "There really wasn't anything in my pumpkin juice?" he asked slowly. "But the weather's good…and Vaisey couldn't play," he paused. "I honestly haven't been given lucky potion?"
Ron saw Harry nod his head, still smiling at him. After a few moments, Ron couldn't help but break out an enormous smile as well. I really did it all by myself. I'm not the worst Quidditch player around! But someone obviously thinks I am his smile faded just as quickly as it had come. He turned to face Hermione, ignoring the look of discomfort and shame on her face.
"You added Felix Felicis to Ron's juice this morning, that's why he saved everything!" he cruelly imitated Hermione's accusation from before. "See! I can save goals without help, Hermione!"
A very hurt, desperate looking Hermione quickly added, "I never said you couldn't—Ron, you thought you'd been given it too!" Tears had welled up in her eyes, now threatening to spill down her cheeks.
An enraged Ron grabbed his broomstick and stomped past her, making his way towards Hogwarts castle without a backwards glance.
Hermione trembled, both out of guilt and out of rage, an internal battle ensuing in her mind. I completely ruined this. Why couldn't I just let him be happy? It was wrong! You had to try to keep him from breaking the rules. But he hates you now. You harped on a sensitive issue and doubted his abilities. What kind of friend are you? The kind who wanted him to do the right thing! How was I supposed to know that Harry faked it?!
Harry, feeling awkward, tried to break the tension: "Er…shall…shall we go up to the party, then?" he offered a weak smile.
Boys are so thick! Hermione thought angrily. "You go!" she spat furiously. "I'm sick of Ron at the moment, I don't know what I'm supposed to have done…" she continued murmuring to herself as she stormed out of the changing room.
Where the bloody hell does she get off?! Ron groused as he climbed the front steps of the castle. She thinks I'm the world's biggest prat, a thick-headed troll who doesn't know one end of his wand from the other! I'm capable. I'm not completely dim-witted. Yet she's always surprised and doesn't believe when I actually accomplish something! Ron seethed, steam almost visible from his ears as though he had just eaten an entire jar of Pepper Imps.
It was Ron's pride more than anything that had been wounded. He always felt outshone when it came to having Harry Potter as a best friend, and Hermione certainly seemed to favor famous wizards. Once again, his thoughts returned to Viktor Krum—Bulgarian seeker extraordinaire. As much as he tried, he couldn't seem to get the image of Hermione with her lips pressed against Krum's out of his mind. Damn it, Ginny! Why'd you have to tell me about that?!
As he began the long ascent from the entrance hall to Gryffindor Tower, his mood did not much improve. Imagining Hermione entwined with Viktor Krum set his teeth on edge, and the images continued plaguing him. I'm just not good enough for her. She doesn't want anything to do with me. Why would she? I'm pathetic.
When Ron finally arrived at the portrait of the Fat Lady, she winked at him and swung forward without asking for the password. A flood of excited sounds poured out of the opened portrait hole as Ron stepped through it. All around him, his fellow Gryffindors were cheering and loudly chanting "WEASLEY IS OUR KING!"
Hermione, you've got to tell him. You've got to. But he's so angry, and he hates me for doubting him all the time. Why can't I just tell him how I really feel? That he's also a great wizard, that he has one of the purest, bravest hearts I've ever seen, that I want him all to myself… He'd just reject me. I'll always be the annoying, bushy-haired, buck-toothed, know-it-all to him.
Hermione continued her internal battle the whole snowy march up the castle, actively avoiding the shoeprints in the snow she suspected belonged to Ron. She wanted to apologize to Ron for doubting his abilities, but her pride was not happy about this. Hermione's straightforward conscience knew that if she had been right, she would have had to report Harry and Ron. But since she was wrong…
I guess I Do need to apologize she sighed. You love Ron. Make this right. You have to tell him how you really feel. Resolved, Hermione purposely climbed the Grand Staircase with the aim of reaching the Gryffindor common room.
Hermione had loved Ron for several years now. She first fell in love during her first year after seeing Ron's bravery while directing his troops during the life-size wizard's chess match. He was willing to sacrifice himself so that she and Harry could go forward and protect the Sorcerer's Stone. Since then, they had bickered and quarreled and fought at almost every opportunity, but her feelings never fluctuated.
She had kissed Viktor Krum for curiosity's sake, but mainly because she wanted to make Ron jealous. Viktor, while still infatuated with her, was not her ideal partner. He was much too crass and had a certain fondness for Dark Magic of which she did not approve.
No…Hermione Granger loved Ron Weasley.
An irresistible smile suddenly returned to Ron's face as he took in the sights and sounds of the common room that were all for him. I really did it on my own! I'm not worthless! A look of triumph gleamed in his eyes as surveyed the gold and scarlet confetti magically raining down from the ceiling. Someone had even snuck in several of Fred and George's famed fireworks. The red and gold pinwheels, spirals, and dragons made the common room a very festive sight indeed. Dean and Seamus had apparently also acquired food from the House Elves in the basement kitchen and every surface was covered in Butterbeers, mince pies, Cauldron Cakes, and many other delicious foods.
Ron felt a surge of pride and elation begin in his chest, reveling in the party atmosphere as he made his way towards a more deserted section of the common room. Suddenly, Lavender Brown, one of Hermione's roommates, strode over towards him and stood rather close. Her brown eyes gazed shyly at him from under her thick lashes and offered a nervous smile. She gently placed her hand into his hand, waiting to see how he would respond.
Blimey…I never really noticed that Lavender's pretty. Ron was astounded that a girl was taking the time to look at him like this. In the past, Lavender and Parvati and the other girls in his year had never spoken more than a few words to him. All this because I won the game? he felt empowered.
Ron continued to study Lavender for another moment, her adoring eyes filled with excitement and pining. Her eyes reminded him slightly of Hermione's, but they lacked the warmth and depth that hers possessed. Ron felt something stir deep within him, a warm, desperate longing for things yet unknown to him. What about Hermione? his conscience chimed in. You want her. Not this pathetic substitute. No! Hermione has her precious Viktor. She doesn't want me anyway he thought bitterly, not allowing himself to imagine the impossibility of a life with Hermione Granger.
Lavender fluttered her eyelashes at Ron, slowly moving herself closer and closer to him. Ron felt a shudder of excitement run through his body, amazed that he, Ronald Weasley, was having this sort of effect on a girl as good-looking as Lavender Brown. Now resolved and not thinking about how it was done, he hastily (and rather clumsily) brought his lips to rest against Lavender's. She greedily pressed her own against his and wrapped her arms tightly around his neck. Ron groaned softly as she molded her soft body around his. Her hands knotted wildly in his hair as she desperately tried to deepen the kiss.
This is snogging then, eh? Ron thought rather smugly. Good god. How do people do anything other than this? It's fantastic he mused, gasping for breath as Lavender brought her lips to his neck.
Determination filled Hermione's heart and a smile formed on her face as she pushed her way through the portrait hole. I have to find Ron. I have to tell him how I feel. Gazing at the frenzy of movement and people, her eyes desperately searched for a flash of red hair. She glanced to her right and saw some, but it was Ginny holding hands with Dean, a slight look of annoyance on her face.
She spotted her roommate Parvati and hurried to her side. "Have you seen Ron?" she asked, her eyes still roving the room.
Parvati made a disgusted sound in her throat before she spoke, "Who hasn't? It's revolting," she grumbled.
"What?" Hermione asked, the corners of her mouth lowering slightly. Parvati nodded her head in the direction of the far side of the room and returned to eating her Cauldron Cake. Hermione searched where Parvati had indicated, and all at once, she froze.
There, locked in an impossibly tight, impossibly intimate embrace with her roommate Lavender Brown, was Ron. His mouth hungrily devoured hers as his arms snaked around her waist. Hermione watched them for seconds…minutes…who knew. Time had lost meaning to her. Watching Ron give that much of himself to another girl shattered her once-hopeful heart.
Clutching her chest, trying to breathe normally again, Hermione staggered back several steps. "Hermione? Are you okay?" Parvati asked, her brows furrowed in concern.
"I…I'm…I'm," Hermione stuttered as she backed farther away. Taking one last glance at Ron and Lavender, she fled through the portrait hole, desperately searching for a place where she could properly mourn.
A/N: Hello everyone! This is my second fanfic for Harry Potter and I'm most excited to write this one! I think one of the greatest things about the world Jo Rowling created is that the characters are so real and there are SO many, which makes for hundreds of pairings and endless opportunities for stories.
I've always thought Ron and Hermione's relationship was interesting to observe because they found it so difficult to swallow their pride and admit they were in love with each other for so long.
The name for this fic was inspired by the line Ron says in Goblet of Fire film: "Would have taken her myself if she wasn't so bloody proud."
This is the first time I've tried point-of-view shifts quite like this, so please let me know what you think of the format/pacing so I can take feedback into account for Ch. 2. Enjoy!
