Well, I felt like doing something Christmas-y and realized that unless I wanted to be writing about Christmas until spring, that I should start in advance. Hence, the story is essentially finished. I started it after reading the Gossip Girl books, so that's where the odd tense comes from as well as the few first person remarks. In my defense, the first chapter of Harry Potter starts out that way.
But I actually liked Gossip Girl, very catty, very materialistic, very shallow. It's responsible for my worst nightmare. Which is when Blaire and Serena open all their college letters and Blaire gets in nowhere and Serena gets in everywhere. Yeah, my nightmare features me in Blaire's shoes.
But yeah, this is not my normal style. The relationship is rushed, but in typical me fashion is not a one-night stand, but continues. However, there is angst, waltz-tango, long toes, mistletoe, carolers, and there's even snow! (read: blizzard). So, basic holiday stuff, with some sexy stuff and some humor and some pretty bizarre pairings. In fact, some of them scare me. A lot.
I have sketches, which hopefully will end up on my Deviant Art page. Let's hope for motivation and some computer coloring. Dante's hard to draw, currently she's a cross between Google Images "Italian woman" and Alanis Morissette plus a cat. Sexy, withered, and just a little creepy. Which is pretty much Dante.
And yes, Christmas is my favorite holiday and I don't do waiting well…
Disclaimer: I don't own FMA (otherwise it wouldn't be finished), Bebe, any brand name stuff mentioned. Nor do I own any smelling salts.
Prologue.
Trisha Elric had held many jobs over the years. With a major in business from Columbia and a knack for marketing, Trisha had made herself an asset to many companies. She'd worked in PR, marketing research, management, and sales. She was an excellent secretary and successful receptionist. Trisha attributed this multifaceted success to people skills and a head for numbers. While this was certainly true, another quality contributed to Trisha's rise in the corporate world: her inability to say 'no.'
Thus she was often roped into things that a normal person would have refused. Fortunately for her, she was good at a lot of those things and when she didn't know something, she'd either learn it or come up with a better idea. Bosses loved her. She could handle just about any problem and if she couldn't, well she'd come up with something brilliant and vastly superior to the original idea.
However, Trisha honestly wouldn't describe herself as a business genius. No, if she was really honest, she'd say marketing assistant, secretary, or aspiring writer. Writing was the one thing Trisha had never pursued. Her Midwestern parents had scoffed at English majors, considering them worthless degrees (which is pretty much true, unless you want to teach English, write, or waste your parents' tuition money). She'd taken advanced courses in high school, stating that four years was required and honors and AP looked good on college applications.
In college, she'd enjoyed the English courses, but always wished she could have taken something like Medieval Literature or Romantic Poetry. However, her parents were paying for most of her tuition, so she majored instead in Business.
That didn't stop her from writing short, little sketches on the side. Sketches that later turned into scenes. Scenes that became part of short stories that she'd edit on her lunch breaks. Short stories which after a while amounted to a small compilation of short stories. Short stories that lengthened into novels-in-progress.
It was when Trisha typed the final words to her story that she realized she had a problem. What was she going to do now that she had finished it? Should she just let it gather virtual dust on her hard drive? Should she post it on the Internet like she'd done with the fanfiction of her youth? On a whim she googled "submitting a manuscript" and began formatting immediately.
Trisha Elric, aspiring writer, submitted the manuscript to Lazy Cats Publishing. Three days later, Trisha Elric, part-time writer, sold the second edition rights to Random House. Trisha waited eagerly for news of the book. There were visions of media appearances, book signings, and possibly being accepted into Oprah's book club.
One month later, The End of The Academy was at an undisclosed (Trisha was embarrassed to admit to the exact number) Amazon Book rank. That was when the renowned authoress, respected historian, honored TV mystery narrator (she pulled off disembodied-voice-of-the-murder-victim like no other), world traveler, famous translator, gourmet chef, and general household name, Dante Alighieri-Sraoilleog-Grådighet said that, and I quote, "The End of The Academy is worth reading."
Bam.
Instant bestseller. In several countries.
Trisha was amazed. She was stunned. She was flabbergasted. (She was also mildly put out that her book needed help to be appreciated, but that was a small part that shriveled and died when she received the royalties check.) Mainly, she was speechless. Dante Alighieri-Sraoilleog-Grådighet had not only read, but liked her book enough to recommend it to the world (when you were as famous as Dante Alighieri-Sraoilleog-Grådighet any recommendation was to the world).
Trisha called in sick that day, hoping to spend the time when her sons, Alphonse and Edward, were at school to craft a suitable thank you. After spending the morning complying a printed mass of all the interviews and comments Dante Alighieri-Sraoilleog-Grådighet had ever made (another one of Trisha's talents was superhumanly efficient researching), Trisha retired to her bed with a pen, paper, clipboard, and a package of Queen Anne Chocolate Covered Cherries.
Pen poised above the blank white page as she savored the remains of the firs t cherry, Trisha realized this: she had absolutely no idea what to write.
How do you thank the woman who has single handedly made your literary career without sounding fawning? Dante's (Trisha felt a chill run down her spine at referring to her idol by her first name only. Even though it was only in her head, it still felt like she was taking liberties) comment may have just been an honest remark, not meant to cause a widespread demand for the book. Dante Alighieri-Sraoilleog-Grådighet (Trisha didn't take liberties as a general rule. This was yet another thing her bosses loved about her) may have meant it in the same way one would say … come to think of it, there really wasn't anyway the statement "The End of The Academy is a book worth reading" couldn't be construed as anything but positive.
But maybe it was just an offhand comment. Like Dante Alighieri-Sraoilleog-Grådighet made those. Nonetheless, Trisha checked the context of the remark. Dante had been asked about several other best sellers and had responded monosyllabically. When asked if there was any book she liked this year, she'd named Trisha's.
Well damn, how do you write a thank you note for that?
Trisha didn't know. She didn't know after an hour and she didn't know when all of the cherries were gone. In the end, Trisha spent the rest of the day working on another one of her novels-in-progress. She took the next five days off. Then she quit her job.
Well, not technically. Her boss had been so distraught at the prospect of losing her that she was now on an extended leave. The type young mothers take to raise their children. Everything was going well, when Trisha got a letter some time in November. It was from Random House.
At the time, she'd sighed and hoped it wasn't another one demanding a sequel, book signing tour, or another book. It was far too thick for a royalties check. She opened it and nearly fainted.
They were asking her about a possible translation and were wondering if she'd mind if Dante Alighieri-Sraoilleog-Grådighet was the translator.
Mind!
Mind?
Not in Trisha's wildest dreams had she imagined this. She reread the letter. Apparently, Dante had contacted Random House and asked to do the translation. Trisha was stunned.
Of course she was even more stunned when Dante asked if she wouldn't mind meeting in person in, say, December. Sure the day that worked best for Dante was also the evening of the Elric's Christmas Party, which Trisha had offered to cancel. But Dante wouldn't hear of that. Trisha had then expected Dante to suggest another date. Instead, Dante Alighieri-Sraoilleog-Grådighet invited herself and children (all of her children) to the Elric's party. Trisha was thrilled; however, that word can hardly be used to describe the reactions of Hohenheim, Edward, and Alphonse. They reacted to the change in plans with varying degrees of trepidation.
