Warning: IF YOU DON'T LIKE YAOI (BOY/BOY) DO NOT READ! YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED!
Title: Stay With Me
Disclaimer: I do not own Attack on Titan or any of the characters.
Rated: T (Language) [Rating will change to M in the future]
Pairings: Jean/Armin, Erwin/Levi, Eren/Armin
In this story, the ages are different, but it's still not an AU ;). Jean, Reiner, Jurgen and Bertolt are 22. Annie and Ymir are 24. Eren, Mikasa and Armin are 18. Historia/Krista is 17. Connie and Sasha are 19. Dieter is 23. Erwin is 38, Hange is 27 and Levi is 36. If I missed anyone, I will input their age as they arrive in the story.
I hope you guys enjoy! It's been years since I've been on here, and I'm happy to be back!
Chapter 1
Snow came down heavily on the living quarters of the Scout Regiment. The sun had disappeared days ago after a snowstorm claimed the area Northeast of Inner Wall Rose where the regiment had built up their new barracks. To everyone's relief, training had been cancelled for a few weeks until the storm cleared up.
Armin Arlert sat in the chair next to the window on his side of the two-man barracks room, staring out at the beautiful white blanket of snow that covered everything. And it continued to pile on. It had been snowing for days and luckily for them, Commander Erwin decided to take this time to let everyone visit their families for a couple weeks before the next mission. That meant no training, which was more than the remaining few that didn't have family to visit could have asked for.
Armin turned to see his roommate, Jean Kirstein, come in through the front door, bringing a gust of cold air and snow with him. "Shit!" He growled in frustration, reaching for the door that had pulled itself out of his grasp. He pushed it back until it clicked into the door frame, locking both the deadbolt and doorknob.
"My bad," he said without looking up at the blonde, stomping his shoes against the rug in front of the door and pulling off his signature green cloak. The whole front of his body was soaked with melted snow, making him shiver slightly.
Brushing a few snow flurries out of his hair, Jean looked up at the quiet boy sitting across the room. "Enjoying the view?" He asked, nodding towards the window Armin was looking out of. He only asked because he had to walk around the building and pass that window to get inside and he had slipped, falling face first into the snow.
The blonde smirked before turning back to the window, confirming that he had been watching the whole time. Jean laughed softly at himself, shrugging off the embarrassment he had felt before he began to shred his soaked clothes. What the hell had he fallen in, a damn puddle? Why was there a puddle in the middle of a freezing snowstorm… He'd have to get changed now before he got sick.
The sound of wet clothes slapping against the wall next to the doorway made Armin glance back again; his face turning a shade of pink at the sight. Jean had already unbuckled the many belt straps that covered the uniform and pulled off his uniform jacket and white shirt, tossing them to the side and showing off his, actually quite masculine, torso. Armin had never realized that Jean was as built as he was. The guy looked lean and thin in his uniform just like they all did. Actually, now that he thought about it, Armin had never really checked the man out like that before.
Of course not, because they were friends. Good friends in fact. After the attack from the female Titan, they had become even closer; even having the option of who they wanted to be roommates with and they chose each other without hesitation. Of course Eren would have been his first choice since they were best friends, but Armin knew Mikasa would want to room with him. And he actually really enjoyed Jean's company, even if the man was an ass sometimes. But Armin had never really thought of his friend like that before. He had always known he liked guys, but Jean had been someone he was close to, kind of like Eren in a way. And staring at him across the room now, shirtless and about to be pant-less made the younger Scout's mind wander a bit.
Jean pulled his ridiculously long boots off and tossed them next to the door, unbuttoning his pants. They had had accountability formation that morning, that was the only reason he had his uniform on in the first place. But instead of coming straight back to his room like Armin did, he decided to eat breakfast with Reiner, Krista and Ymir first. He had missed dinner the night before and he had been starving, though now he felt maybe freezing his ass off in the blizzard wasn't worth the small serving of eggs and sausage.
He pulled off his pants and added them to the pile, before walking in his briefs to the side of his bed, grabbing a pair of boxers from his dresser; all the while, watching Armin watch him from the corner of his eye. He inwardly smirked at this. He'd had a crush on the smaller boy for some time now, though his "assholeishness" helped hide that fact very well. And he had intended on keeping that a secret too, to save himself the shitty feeling of rejection and keep a good friendship. Though Armin's staring was making him think otherwise now.
After donning a pair of black sweatpants and a short sleeved, white button-up shirt, Jean flopped down on his bed, stretching out and yawning loudly. "Great day to be lazy and sleep all day, ya know?" He said, trying to make conversation. He put his right arm behind his head, the other on his chest as he closed his eyes.
"What's wrong with you," Jean chuckled, glancing sideways at the blonde. Armin hadn't said a word since he got back to the room. "You're always talking. What's up, no great words of wisdom today?" Jean was always full of sarcasm, but he took comfort in the fact that Armin always seemed to understand that, and never took it to heart. Sometimes he'd laugh at the older man, smirk or just give a smartass remark back. Jean loved that about him. Anyone who shared his sense of humor and was willing to take a chance to understand him was ok in his book. Armin, Reiner and Marco had been the only ones it seemed.
"Just… Thinking I guess." Armin said, his face still a little red as he continued to stare out the window. They had no training, no expeditions for a few weeks, no Titan worries. He really had nothing to worry about and should be thankful for this time to rest. But thoughts sometimes came back to his Grandfather and his parents. It made him sad and all he wanted to do was mope around; just stare out the window and imagine life back in Shiganshina.
"Come here, brat." Jean called, making the blonde sigh heavily. He was depressed. He didn't want to move… But he stood anyways and walked over to Jean without question, sitting on his bed across from Jean's.
When the taller man, patted the spot on the bed next to him, Armin's face flushed again and Jean gave him a weird look. "What's up with you today? You're acting weirder than usual." Armin scratched the back of his neck nervously, wondering why he was acting odd himself.
Normally on days off when the weather was crappy, the two would lay next to each other and talk for hours. Just talking and laughing. Armin would cuddle up underneath the covers and tell Jean all the stories he'd read about the outside world, or stories his Grandfather would tell him. And Jean would lay on top of the comforter and listen, actually interested in the stories the blonde would tell. It was their thing to say the least, and the main reason why Jean had started falling for him the way he had.
Armin shook his head and moved from his bed to Jean's. He didn't feel like laying down though, there was too much on his mind, including Jean's naked body. That mixed with thoughts of his dead family didn't go well together. It just ended up making Armin frustrated and confused about everything which made him even more depressed that he had no control over his thoughts or how to deal with his feelings.
"Talk to me." Jean said, worry in his eyes as he watched Armin move his legs to sit Indian-style next to him. Armin was normally very vocal about his feelings, so keeping to himself worried Jean. Armin would almost always tell him everything. Even talk to him when he felt like he couldn't talk to anyone else; including Eren and Mikasa.
"Just…" Armin glanced down, sighing again as he rubbed his arm in thought. "My parents, I guess. And my grandpa. I miss them more than usual today, I suppose." He said, avoiding eye contact as he scratched at something on his arm. Whenever he talked about them with someone, direct eye contact would usually make him cry. So instead he'd look away, scratch or pinch at himself to bring his thoughts elsewhere and to keep him from crying.
Jean had noticed his antics though. They'd been together everyday for almost a year now since they'd joined the regiment. It wasn't more than 3 months after joining that they built the new barracks and after living with someone for about 9 months, you start to learn how they are and who they are.
He pulled the blonde down to him gently so that Armin was laying on his chest and almost immediately, Armin burst into tears. He cried easily, he was just more emotional than others. Kind of like a girl, Jean had thought at one point in time. But not this time. He actually felt bad for him and he couldn't tell him he understood what he was going through because Jean still had his family. All he could do was comfort him.
"I'm sorry…" Jean whispered, kissing the boys temple and holding him tighter when he started to shake from his sobs.
This is actually… Nice. Armin thought, enjoying the feeling of Jean holding him so securely. He hadn't been held like this since his Grandfather had told him about the loss of his parents. That was almost 6 years ago… Had it really been 6 years since he'd hugged anyone or been hugged himself? An arm over the shoulder from Eren or a side hug from Mikasa wasn't the same.
Armin's cries began to soften and he sniffled a bit, loosening his grip on Jean's shirt where he'd wrinkled it up from holding so tight. This really was amazing, almost like therapy. How did Jean seriously not hate him at this point. Even Mikasa would tell him to stop whining all the time, and Jean was usually the one he'd end up crying around whenever he was upset. Though normally they'd lay on there own separate beds while Jean talked him out of his depression. He'd never actually embraced him before.
"I'm sorry… You must be so annoyed with me most of the time." Armin sighed into Jean's chest, pushing up to lay his head in the crook of the man's neck. He couldn't believe this was the first time he'd ever thought about being this close to Jean. The thought may have passed through his mind once or twice while they were drinking, but it was nothing more than a passing thought and wasn't revisited later. Though he never took to browsing his friends to find someone he'd be attracted to either. Everyone, including him, had their own worries to think about.
"I'm not," Jean said, running his hand across the smaller boy's back as he felt tears falling onto his neck from Armin's cheeks. He wiped away another tear before hooking his finger under the boy's chin, lifting Armin's face to look at him. "You don't annoy me, alright? We all deal with troubles in our life differently… I just... try to understand you. But you don't annoy me." It was true, he really did try to understand what Armin was going through. But Jean still had his mother, and losing comrades was not the same as losing the family that loved you and raised you.
Armin didn't respond. He just stared into Jean's light brown eyes, thinking for a moment as another tear fell. Geez, he really was a baby sometimes. But Jean was trying to comfort him. It was really nice. And warm… And he was so close to Jean's face, it made his heart rate speed up and the color in his cheeks from crying flushed to a darker shade of pink.
Armin felt warm, unsteady breathing mingle with his own as they continued to stare each other down. He'd never kissed anyone before, or even been this close to someone else's face, and the only thing racing through his head at the moment was how badly he wanted to kiss one of his closest friends… What the hell had gotten into him?
Instead of thinking reasonably like he usually did, the blonde threw reason out the window for a moment as he leaned in closer until their lips barely touched. It sent a shock of excitement through them both, causing Jean's hand to clamp down on Armin's waist tightly, as if trying to hold him back.
Taking advantage of someone while they were in an emotional state was just bad karma all around. No matter how much he cared for Armin, this was a bad direction to take things in when the boy wasn't thinking logically. "Armin, wai-"
A banging at the door made them both shoot straight up as if the intruder had already walked in and caught them. Another series of loud knocks had reminded Jean that he'd locked the door, making the brunette sigh in relief. He gave Armin a quick, apologetic glance before jumping up to answer it.
Outside stood a small, slightly shivering Captain Levi who stared up at him impatiently, pushing his way into the room. "Arlert, get dressed. You have an hour before you need to report for guard duty at the Karanese District." He said, glancing sideways at Jean. "What are you doing here, don't you have family to visit?"
Jean shook his head, "I wasn't planning on visiting them.. Sir."
Levi looked back at Arlert for a moment as if in thought, though his emotionless expression didn't really give them much to go on. Nodding a few times, Levi looked back at him, "Very well then, you get dressed too. You're both on duty. Hurry up and get to Karanese. You're working the top of the outer gate."
"Guard duty!? Captain, I thought this was suppose to be our vacation, what the hell?!" Jean knew he was out of line, and even Armin shook his head, giving him a "too much" look. But the regiment had very few breaks between training and expeditions. Any break should be given to everyone, not just those with family. "Why can't Garrison pull that?"
Unlike the other squad leaders, Levi wasn't the type to get bent out of shape when someone was voicing their opinion. The only time he'd really get pissed off was if he gave an order that was never carried out. "I don't make the bullshit orders, I distribute. I already talked to the Commander about it and there's no negotiating. Either pack and get out of here or be at guard duty in an hour. I suggest you decide quickly. The ride to Karanese is 40 minutes."
With that, Levi pulled his green hood over his head and opened the door, stepping out into the blizzard.
Jean slammed the door behind him out of rage. "You've got to be kidding me. Guard duty in the damn snow?! What the hell, this is bullshit!" He yelled angrily, fighting the urge to punch the concrete wall. It wouldn't have ended well on his end. "Forget this, I'm out."
He didn't give Armin another glance, knowing he'd probably give in and stay if he did. After what just happened, he felt that maybe if he stayed they could get even closer like he'd been hoping for these past few months. But if he was going to have to pull guard duty in a blizzard, and probably more than once, he might as well just get the hell out of there and start over when he got back. If there was anything now, it would still be here when he came back from leave.
Arms wrapping tightly around his waist made him freeze in place, stopping him from tossing his clothes into the bag he'd pulled out and thrown onto his bed. "Please don't go…" Armin's voice was a soft whisper and his face was pressed into Jean's back, muffling the words. It was so quiet Jean almost didn't hear him.
He didn't know whether it was this new feeling he felt for the brunette or the fact that he wanted someone to be close to while he found himself once again saddened by the absence of his parents and grandfather. Or maybe having that physical contact after going without for years was what made him stop Jean from packing. Stop him from leaving him alone. Even if Eren and Mikasa hadn't left to stay with Hannes and his family for the two weeks, talking to them wouldn't be the same.
"Please.. Stay with me."
=To Be Continued=
Please read&review, thank you for reading! I hope you guys enjoyed it!
