"Come on, chickens! Come get your food!" Piper calls out to the sidewalk outside. She has a bowl of corn in her arms, and is tossing it around the grass and cement.
Jason sits on his usual chair on the porch step, and furrows his eyebrows. "Piper, dear, we have no chickens."
Piper spins around. "But we do! I just saw them! Look, they're right there!" she objects, pointing to the garden statues. She kneels over by them with corn in her hand. "It's okay, Sparky just doesn't believe like I do," she says in a motherly voice to them.
It's been like this ever since…forever.
You drive me crazy.
And I must,
Like…
The craze.
He kneels by the empty baby cradle, the one they were never quite able to fill for longer than a few weeks. Jason's hands envelope the blankets, but there's nothing there but the fleece.
"There, there, Sarah. It's alright, Daddy's here," he reassures the air.
Piper blinks from the doorway, taken aback by their second child's name. One of the only ones who actually made it home. "Jason, she's not there. Sarah died," Piper reminds him gently.
Jason gives her a look of hostility. "Just because the last one didn't make it, doesn't mean Sarah won't!" he yells at her.
"You've gone mad! All our children are dead, Jason! All five of them!" Piper screams, slamming the bedroom door and leaving Jason behind.
It doesn't help, because she can still hear Jason calming an imaginarily crying baby.
You drive me crazy.
You drive me crazy.
Say…
You drive me crazy.
And I must,
Like…
The craze.
"I like these colors, don't you?" Piper asks as she spreads out a variety of blues, pinks, and greens across the kitchen table.
Jason studies her, and then the colors, trying to figure out if she's having one of her moments. Moments when not everything lines up like it should. "They're…beautiful," he decides.
Piper smiles in happiness. "Jason, I just knew you'd love them! I picked them out for you!"
"And I agreed to them for you," Jason tells her, kissing her lightly on the lips.
She laughs, a totally chaotic and uncontrolled one. "We'll start tomorrow! But first, I need you to help me," she requests, holding on to the chair.
"With what?" Jason asks, a little concerned.
"Why, it's Kaleb's naptime! And you know how hard it is to get him to sleep. And you sing the most beautiful lullabies," Piper informed him like it was obvious. "Besides, I'm a little tired too."
You drive me crazy.
You drive me crazy.
All day long…
I knock my head against the wall.
Holding on…
To nothing I own at all.
"Piper, dear, I've made us dinner!" Jason calls from the kitchen.
Piper hesitantly walks forward from her spot at the window. Last time he did this, it was a total disaster. Last time, he was convinced they had company, but Piper could see no one.
She sits at the table, her eyes closed so that she doesn't have to see the scene around her. Piper doesn't want to admit that Jason's long lost his mind.
Jason sets something on the table in front of her. "I've been working on this all afternoon. I'm not as good as a cook as you, but I hope you'll like it."
Piper opens her eyes to a plate of fried chicken and mashed potatoes. It looks edible, but Piper is a little scared. Sometimes, she's afraid that Jason might put chemicals in the food thinking they were something different. "This looks…nice, Jason."
But he's not there, and Piper starts to worry. He comes from the living room in a few moments, his hands behind his back. "Jason, don't do that to me! I was worried that-"
She cuts off as Jason gets down on one knee with a small box in his hand. "Piper McLean, will you be my wife?"
"Of course," Piper quickly answers, allowing him to put the rubber band on her ring finger that is already occupied by a beautiful silver ring.
She doesn't have the strength to tell him that they've already been married for twenty-one years, and Piper McLean doesn't exist anymore.
When the night falls…
I just need some time to relax.
And not be nit-picked behind my back.
With a nagging done by a maniac.
"Oh, look at that! Jason, did you just see that shooting star?" Piper asks in wonder.
Jason reaches out for her hand as they lay on the back lawn and look up to the sky. He saw nothing, but doesn't have the heart to tell her that. "Yes, I did," he tells her.
Her ever-changing eyes are mesmerized by the invisible meteor shower, and she excitedly points and shouts again. "Look, Jason! Make a wish!"
"I wish that we would stay sane," Jason mumbles, but just enough for only himself to hear it. Piper still looks at him expectantly, so he comes up with something else. "I wish for more shooting stars!" he shouts.
Piper bursts out laughing and lightly hits him on the chest. "Jason! That's cheating!" she tells him. "You know what I wish for?"
"What?"
She cuddles with him on the ground even more tightly and thinks for a moment. "I wish…" but she leaves off, falling asleep.
Jason's almost glad, because he wasn't sure he wanted to know what she wished for. All he knows is that the sky above them only holds a stormy night with lightning that doubles as shooting stars.
You drive me crazy.
And I must,
Like…
The craze.
The townspeople sometimes talk and laugh behind the Grace's backs. The grocer talks about how Mrs. Grace was chatting with the watermelons the other day like they were her children.
They don't realize that to Mrs. Grace, they were her children. The ones that died years ago, but in her mind for just a few minutes, were still alive and shopping with her.
Sometimes, the neighbor kids will peek over the fence just to pass an afternoon laughing as the couple goes insane. If they're daring, one will sneak onto their property and take things, like Mr. Grace's newspaper or Mrs. Grace's glass of iced tea.
Then, they watch and giggle as they go mad looking for the object, because they knew they had it just a moment ago.
Even the respectful old lady on the corner gossips to the neighbors. "You should've seen that mad man! Walking his cactus plants this morning! Yes, those Graces are completely nuts!"
You drive me crazy.
You drive me crazy.
Say…
You drive me crazy.
And I must,
Like…
The craze.
"Piper! Stay back!" Jason warns her, staring wildly at something in front of Piper.
Piper crosses her arms and looks at Jason. "Honey, there's nothing there. It's alright, promise."
He doesn't believe her, instead pushing her aside and waving the shovel in a threatening way at the shrub Piper was carving into a coiled up snake. "Get away from my wife or I'll cut your head off!"
"Jason, it's just a plant! I've been working on that for days, and if you ruin it I'll…I'll…" Piper doesn't know what to say, because she doesn't know how to get revenge on Jason. It wouldn't be fair anyways, he's not in his right mind.
"Go inside, I don't want you to get hurt! I'll take care of this myself!" Jason yells as he starts to hack away at the shrub.
Piper grabs his shirt collar and pulls him away, causing him to drop the shovel. "Stop it! Go lay down, please! I can't stand to see you like this!"
He obeys, though only after Piper follows him into the house and locks the door. Jason's eyes still twitch towards the front lawn as he gets on the bed.
Afterwards, Piper collapses on the living room floor in tears, because she can't understand how everything went so wrong.
You drive me crazy.
You drive me crazy.
All day long…
I knock my head against the wall.
Holding on…
To nothing I own at all.
Piper's mother, Aphrodite, and Jason's father, Jupiter, sometimes meet and talk about the condition of their children.
"We should just put them out of their misery. Send them off," Jupiter suggests, straightening his pinstripe suit.
Aphrodite fluffs her hair. "That's ridiculous. They're still beautifully in love! It's tragic, yes, but no one can interfere with how much they're still dedicated to each other."
Jupiter snorts. "Is that all you ever talk about? Love?"
"Let me tell you here," Aphrodite says in a powerful voice. "Without love, this world would be nothing! Think of all that would be lost if there was no such thing as love! Love is the strongest thing in the entire universe, Mr. Jupiter!"
He acts like he doesn't believe her. "Woman, you're about as sane as your daughter."
When the night falls…
I just need some time to relax.
And not be nit picked behind my back.
With a nagging done by a maniac.
Who greets me with verbal attacks.
And saps my energy like that.
Why can't I get my bag packed?
And leave this scene before I scream?
"That's it, Jason! I'm leaving!" Piper yells, frantically throwing things into a suitcase with anger.
Jason takes a chair and sets in in front of the bedroom door, sitting himself in it. "Piper, calm down. It was a part of the movie, I didn't do anything," he tells her.
Piper has tears in her eyes as she sweeps all the products from her mirror into the quickly filling bag. "You're lying to me! Just like you did when you said you were going out with your friends that one time!"
Jason sighs and puts his head into his hands. "Piper, we were fifteen and not even dating yet. And Reyna, Dakota, and Gwen were my friends," Jason gently explains just as he's done the last times that Piper has repeated this.
It works just like it always has, and Piper snaps out of her moment of insanity. She looks around to the mess she's made and goes limp, but Jason catches her. "Why do I do this?" she says before she starts sobbing.
"I don't know, but it's okay. I'll always be here for you."
You drive me crazy.
And I must,
Like…
The craze.
"Darling, were is the baby?" Jason asks Piper from the living room.
Piper clenches her fists, trying to stay calm. No, he can't be doing this. Not with her mother here. "We don't have a baby, Jason," she tells him.
Jason appears in the doorway, running his hand through his blonde hair. "I want to show your mom how cute Ben is when he smiles. I just can't seem to find him anywhere!"
"How about you go look in our bedroom?" Piper suggests, laying down the dirty dish cloth as he leaves. She goes to the living room to find her elegant mother sitting on the couch.
Piper sits by her, and grabs her hands. "Mother, I'm sorry that you had to see this. He'll be back in just a few minutes…in both ways," she apologizes.
Aphrodite smiles, but it's full of understanding. "As long as you love each other, that's all you need. Love is what makes you whole."
"But it's not enough to fix us!"
You drive me crazy.
You drive me crazy.
Say…
You drive me crazy.
And I must,
Like…
The craze.
Jason catches Piper as she's in the bathroom with the door open, screaming her head off. She's pointing at things all over in the bathroom, and yelling for Jason to bring the bug killer.
"Look! They're all over! It's so disgusting!" she yells frantically.
Jason sprays it in every corner, every nook, everywhere, just to make her satisfied. It works, because she starts to calm down as they 'die'.
Now there's just random amounts of spray in their bathroom. At least the bugs will stay away. Since they weren't ever there in the first place.
"Piper, what were you doing in here anyway with the door open?" Jason asks in curiosity.
Piper points to the empty towel rack. "I was coming to get the towels when I saw the bugs all over them. By the way, where are those towels? I don't remember picking them up…" she explains, now looking all over the bathroom.
Jason vaguely remembers the towels already down in the basement in the laundry basket. "Sweetie, I took them down for you," he lies.
But it seems to relieve her. "Okay, thank you," she says, and gives him a long kiss. "I love you."
The answer comes easily to Jason. Because no matter how crazy she is, she'll always be his. "I love you, too."
You drive me crazy.
You drive me crazy.
All day long…
You drive me crazy.
You drive me crazy.
It's one of those moments, but not one of the crazy ones. It's one of the precious moments when they're both sane, and they're both there.
Piper loves these moments.
She sits with him on the porch swing in front of their colorful house. "Jason, why on earth did you let me paint the house these colors?" she asks.
Jason lightly laughs. "It's what you wanted, so I let you."
"It's not what I wanted, it's what she wanted. You know, that other Piper that I resent becoming," Piper bitterly tells him, stroking the cracked wood on the swing.
Piper doesn't expect him to take hold of her chin and look her into her eyes with an almost furious look. "Listen to me, Piper. No matter what happens to us, no matter how insane we become, I'll always love you, crazy or not. And nothing can change that. You don't have to be scared of having a moment because I won't leave you. I'll stay until the end."
She thinks back to the night of the shooting stars, and what she wished for. Piper doesn't remember what she did wish for, or if she wished for anything at all. But now, it doesn't matter.
Because Piper wouldn't change a single crazy thing.
Something's wrong…
You drive me crazy.
You drive me crazy.
And I must,
Like…
The craze.
You drive me crazy.
You drive me crazy.
And I must,
Like…
The craze.
So instead of working on my next chapter, I was looking through my old files and realized that I still hadn't finished and posted this. But then of course, I realized that I hated it and completely rewrote it!
Disclaimer: I don't own Jason and Piper. I don't own the poem You Drive Me Crazy by Lawrence S. Pertiller either.
Thank you for everything, you are seriously awesome!
