A/N: LOL. I know. I know. I have the muse for the weirdest things, I swear. These are going to be a collection of one-shots in a universe where the PoT characters are actually students at Hogwarts – Seigaku is Gryffindor, Hyotei is Slytherin, and Rikkai Dai is Ravenclaw; I have yet to decide who will take the place of Hufflepuff. Hehe. Hehehe.

There will be an abundance of shonen-ai pairings, the most prominent being thrill pair (my OTP, really), alpha pair, imperial pair, golden pair, etc, etc.

I am considering making this into an actual story, though, so for those who would like to see that, tell me in a review or something, yes? Hehe.

OOPS: Oh my god. I totally uploaded the wrong document for this first chapter - I uploaded the correct one, now, but in case some of you guys saw the previous version, that was just this random Harry/Draco fic I'd been doing. LOL my baddd.

Disclaimer: I do not own PoT.


"KUNIMITSU-"

A shrill, angry cry fills the crisp autumn air.

Above the ground, seven lithe forms pause in their criss-crossing flight through the air, alighted upon slender, polished brooms. A bespectacled boy who had been steadily floating before the three large rings several meters in the air looks down at the grass below, ears having caught the familiar voice screeching his name. Tezuka felt a renewed throbbing in his head when he saw the figure approaching.

The remaining six boys, in various positions around the Quidditch Pitch, have frozen at the new entry. Momoshiro in particular has forgotten that the last time he looked at Kaidoh, the other boy had sent a sharply-aimed bludger his way; the bat lay limply in his loose grip, now. It was only when said bludger rammed into the back of his head, and he spiraled dangerously out of control for several seconds, that Momoshiro remembered it at all.

"Oi, mamushi! What the hell do you think you're doing!" he squawks. Kaidoh only sends him a disdainful glare; within moments, the two are propelling towards one another.

"M-Momo! Kaidoh! Stop it!" And Oishi's voice, tinged with worry (when was it not, really) joins the fray.

"Ahhh, Shuichiro, nya! Watch out!"

The bludger that Momo had sent Kaidoh's way finds its path towards Oishi instead, who, upon the impact, is hurtled off of his broom.

Luckily, Eiji manages to catch his partner before the boy has hit the floor.

"OH! BURNING! GREAT CATCH, EIJI!" Kawamura has somehow found himself in possession of one of Momo or Kaidoh's bats, nevermind that he was a chaser, and didn't even need one. His energized roars join the ruckus.

Tezuka has officially relinquished his hold upon order over practice.

Well, actually, he'd lost it the moment Atobe Keigo charged onto the pit precisely seven minutes ago, indignantly screeching his name, stalking forward in the grass with an impressive swirl to his cloak. And upon noticing his boyfriend's head, Tezuka had suddenly felt an overwhelming desire to stay just where he was, fifty meters in the air, well out of Atobe's vicinity.

Somewhere on the ground below, he hears Inui's low rumble of "Ii, data."

His migraine intensifies.

"KUNIMITSU!" Atobe screeches again.

This time, all activity in the air stops. All nine pairs of eyes swiveled to Atobe, who stood seething in the center of the grass, looking up with all the indignant squawk of a riled peacock.

Several seconds pass, before:

"…Is that Atobe-"

"Oh my god."

"Nya! Oishi, nya, his head- what's wrong with his head?!"

"OH, BURNING! I RESPECT THE NEW MANLY IMAGE, ATOBE!"

"…Fshhhh…"

"Saa…"

Tezuka wonders in the back of his mind if he has to change the dosage of his pills, again.

"WHERE IS YOUR DAMNABLE HELLION, KUNIMITSU? BRING HIM TO ME AT ONCE!" Atobe has yet to stop screaming, and this time, he punctuates his words with a snarl and a threatening wave of his wand. At the sight of the wand, Tezuka feels spots beginning to dance behind his eyelids.

"Nice hair, Monkey King."

Ryoma had taken the opportunity to swiftly descend back to the ground; with his gloved hand, he casually tossed the golden snitch up and down, up and down. Equally golden eyes, matching the molten hue of the snitch, danced with amusement as he smirked broadly at Atobe from several feet away.

"Saa… was that you, Ryo-baby?" Fuji asks, voice endearing, from beside Ryoma.

"KUNIMITSU! DO SOMETHING AT ONCE-"

With a sigh, Tezuka, too, drops swiftly, fluidly onto the ground to stand between Atobe and Ryoma. He turns a stern gaze to Ryoma, wisely ignoring the delighted gaze of Fuji.

"Ryoma, what did you do-"

"HE CHARMED MY HAIR OFF! MY HAIR! MY GLORIOUS FUCKING HAIR, KUNIMITSU-"

Ryoma's sniggers add to the shrill cries of Atobe.

"…Ryoma."

Mischievous eyes flit up to meet Tezuka's gaze, and he wants to swear. Ever since their first year player had started dating that Fuji, things had gone from bad to worse – and now, Ryoma was equal parts snarky, arrogant, and vengeful.

It was a nightmare.

"Yes, buchou?"

That damned innocence dripping from his words.

"…Why did you turn Keigo bald."

"Kunimitsu, my fucking hair-"

"We made a bet. The loser of Friday's game has to shave his head," Ryoma replied.

"…Ryoma."

"Yes, buchou?"

"It's Thursday."

"Yeah?"

"…The game is tomorrow."

"Well, Monkey King's gonna lose anyway, so what's one more day of being bald?"

"KUNIMITSU, ORE-SAMA'S GLORIOUS HAIR IS GONE- ALL OF IT-"

"Ryoma, put Keigo's hair back."

"Yadda."

"That's my baby – assert your rights, Ryoma."

"Fuji."

Needless to say, it was another three hours before Tezuka's head stopped swimming in hazy pools of hell, and another four days before Atobe deigned to speak to him. It was another week before the charm wore off, and his hair returned.

Tezuka had never experienced a more terrifying two weeks before in his lifetime.


A/N: Here's the lineup for the Seigaku / Gryffindor Quidditch team, in case you wanted to know! Hehe. I'll be posting up their year/grades soon, too. Fuji and Ryoma alternate playing.

Tezuka – Keeper

Kawamura – Chaser

Oishi – Chaser

Eiji – Chaser

Fuji – Seeker

Ryoma – Seeker

Momoshiro – Beater

Kaidoh – Beater

Inui – Trainer