Author's Note: Apologies for those of you who have been following my other story, You Cannot Escape My Embrace, I will be labeling it a complete story. I have lost all of my material and inspiration to write it. I'm sorry, again.
Less depressing note: Most of the fanfics that I've read are about the relationship leading up to the big thing between Damon and Elena, or a wedding. I, naturally, wanted to know what would happen after the wedding. Obviously, being Damon's wife wouldn't be a bed of roses, in my opinion. Don't get me wrong, I love Damon, but he isn't the nicest guy around.
Call me a sinner, call me a saint
Tell me it's over, I'll still love you the same
Call me your favorite, call me the worst
Tell me it's over, I don't want you to hurt
It's all that I can say
So, I'll be on my way
Elena Gilbert sat up in her bed; she hadn't gotten much sleep last night. But, with everything going wrong in her life, she wasn't that surprised. She had just seperated with Damon, living without him was proving to be quite difficult. Their 5 year old son, Grayson, constantly asked when his father was going to come home. She had to be strong for her little boy, he was all she had left. Jenna wouldn't stop asking her if she was okay, Alaric was trying his hardest to be some sort of a father figure for Grayson, but he wasn't Damon. Nobody was Damon, yet everyone was. Every street, resturant, shopping center was filled with his face, his smirk, his heart melting laughter. Stop it, Elena, she chided herself. She had to think of her son now, he needed her.
As if on que, Grayson came barreling through her bedroom door. She straightened up and hid all evidence of pain from her son. He flung himself onto her bed and threw his arms around her. She squeezed him and kissed the top of his head. She brushed his raven hair from his crystal blue eyes and smiled. "What are you doing up so early, mister?"
"Could I have pancakes this morning?" He folded his hands together and mouthed a thousand pleases. She knew that she wouldn't win in a fight with the double of her husband. Grayson had inhereted too much from his father. The most annoying was Grayson's ability to get whatever he wanted. She rolled her eyes and nodded her head. He bombarded her with hugs and kisses before sprinting from her room to the kitchen.
She pulled herself from bed and stepped in front of her mirror. Dear God, Elena, you look awful, she thought. She grabbed an elastic band and pulled her long, chocolate brown hair into a loose ponytail. She wrapped a robe around her small frame and headed for the kitchen.
The boarding house still looked the same as it did before she'd met Damon, but it didn't feel right without him. The vibe was so lonely and gloomy. They'd been seperated for no more than five months, the reason why being unknown to her now. After the seperation, she had insisted that herself and Grayson would stay in the boarding house and that Damon would find other accomedations. She knew that he'd stayed with Stefan for a while, but that ending quickly, unsurprisingly. After that, she didn't really know where he'd gone to. To be honest, at the time, she hadn't cared where he'd gone, as long as if was far away from them. But, no matter how much animosity she felt towards Damon then, she still loved him more than anything. When she'd asked him to leave, he hadn't put up much of a fight. He was like that sometimes, he didn't argue with her when she threw his clothes down the stairs; hadn't asked why when she said he wasn't allowed to see Grayson anymore; he didn't even say that he hated her, quite the opposite actually. As he was about to leave he tried to kiss her cheek, but she had recoiled, causing his heart to desipate into ash. He'd given Grayson a kiss and hug, telling him that he'd come by soon to teach him how to play catch. She'd cried for hours after he'd left, but she was too stubborn to call him and tell him to come home. So, here she was, five months later making pancakes for a five year old and trying not to break down every few minutes.
Grayson had been adiment about his pancake have two eyes and a mouth. He wanted to fill them with syrup. So, she made his face-pancake and set in on a plate in front of him, filling the eyes and mouth with syrup. As soon as she moved her hand away, the child dove into the pancake, getting food on seemingly everything but his mouth. She watched quietly noting all the small things that were so much like Damon. Stop it, she screamed in thought.
He finished soon enough and they went upstairs to clean him up. She changed his clothes and fixed his hair. As she was pulling his shirt down over his head, the doorbell rang. It took everything she had to hold Grayson back from running to the door. She looked at the clock and noticed that Jenna was early today(Jenna came by on Fridays to take Grayson to the park with her child/boyfriend Alaric.) She glided down the stairs and pulled the door open. Jenna smiled and hugged Elena.
"Okay, now where's my boy?" She said loud enough for Grayson to hear her. Grayson ran to the door, throwing his arms around Jenna's legs. Elena bent down and told Grayson to go get his backpack from the toy room. He was gone instantly.
"So, Elena, how are you doing?" Jenna asked, although she knew Elena would say that she was fine or just avoid the question. Elena looked down at her feet and rubbed the back of her neck.
"Grayson," she called out. Avoiding today, Jenna thought. "He's had sugar this morning, so he's a wee bit hyper. Please don't let him out of your sight."
"Elena, Grayson is in good hands." Elena raised her brow at Jenna and they both laughed. "Okay, I'll make sure Alaric in extra careful."
Grayson appeared and kissed Elena's cheek, "I love you, mommy." He hugged her and then ran to Alaric, who was waiting beside the car. Elena hugged Jenna and shut the door as they drove away.
All alone, she thought. What was there really to do? It was Friday and she was alone, again. She couldn't remember the last time she'd seen Bonnie or Caroline or even Jeremy. Bonnie and Jeremy had moved states and Caroline had decided to test her skills in Hollywood. Elena laughed thinking of how bad of a liar Caroline had been. Once, Caroline had tried to sneak alcohol into a party, but she'd been caught by her mom's deputy. She'd tried to lie and say that it wasn't hers, she was just picking it up off the street to throw it away. He'd seen through her immediatly and called her mom, who wasn't very happy when she picked her up.
Elena walked into her laundry room and started a load of wash. She pulled the clothes from her dryer and began folding them. She wasn't half way through them when the phone rang. Thinking the worst had happened to Grayson, she ran to the phone.
"Hello? Jenna, what happened?" She questioned the person on the other line. She heard a small chuckle and then they cleared their throat.
"Elena," he said and she knew instantly who it was.
"Damon, what do you want?" She asked, not really wanting an answer.
"How about, it's nice to hear your voice, Damon. It's been too long, I miss you." He was mocking her now and she wasn't in the mood.
"Enough, Damon," she commanded. "What do you want?" She paced her kitchen, becoming agitated.
"I want to see Grayson, Elena. It's been five months, I need to see my son." He sounded devastated and sad. Elena wanted to hold him and take away his sadness, but she wasn't going to, she couldn't.
"Yes, it's been five months. Without word, or anything telling me that you were still alive. Grayson asked me everyday when you were coming home. Do you know how much that hurt?" She couldn't help but yell at him, words just kept pouring out.
"I know, I know. I'm sorry," he said. She noticed that he sounded like he had been crying, she could practically feel his heartache. She hated to do what she was about to do, but Damon wasn't forgiven for not calling her or Grayson until now.
"I'm sorry, too, but you can't see Grayson." It hurt her to tell the father of her child that he couldn't see him, but it had to be done. She sunk down onto her sofa and used her free arm to hug her body.
"Elena, please. I said I was sorry." He was hurting, she could tell.
"I know and it's still a 'no'." Her apology sounded to fake, even to herself.
"Please, kitten," he cooed making her heart ache for him.
"I told you not to call me that. Please, just leave us alone, Damon." Then the doorbell rang, but she wasn't finished talking to Damon.
"Hold on," she called towards the door. "Listen, I know that you're sorry and I forgive you for leaving, but..." She flung the phone to the couch and headed to the door to stop it's insesant ringing.
She flung the door open and then tried to slam it shut, but failed. Damon caught the door as it was about to close and easily pushed it back open. He hadn't changed a bit. He was still beautiful and irritating. She folded her arms across her chest, "What are you doing here?" She didn't have time to deal with him right now, but she couldn't help but feel glad to be near him again.
"Well, my dear," he said while closing the door. "This is my home, too." He walked around her and scanned the kitchen and living room.
"Where's my boy at?" He said as he walked back to her. She walked around him and began cleaning this morning's breakfast from the table.
"He isn't here. He's with Jenna and Ric for the day." Damon scoffed and walked up behind her. She could feel his breath on her ear and all she wanted to do was turn around and kiss him. She'd missed him so much, but she wouldn't do that to herself, he'd just leave again.
"Elena, you know I always get what I want," he cooed into her ear. His voice was like velvet and it made her knees weak. He began rubbing her shoulders. She spun around, catching him off guard. "Why don't you just go? You're so good at it." She was fuming now, how dare he?
"If I recall, you made me leave," he countered. She knew he was right and she hated him for it.
"Why didn't you fight back? Didn't you want us anymore?" She looked pitiful and heartbroken. Damon wanted so badly to take her in his arms and make her forget that last five months, but he knew she didn't want him anymore.
"Of course I wanted you, want you, Elena. I want you so much. Grayson, too. I didn't fight because you said that you'd be happy without me. All I want is to make you happy." His confession made her sick, she'd done all of this to herself. Her stubbornness has caused her son to have a broken family. She couldn't help herself; she threw her arms around Damon's neck and held on for dear life. Damon didn't waste anytime, he pulled her as close to him as he could manage. She cried into his chest, staining his shirt, but he didn't care. As she cried, he found that he had began crying, too. They stood interlocked for what seemed like hours before pulling away from each other.
She wiped her eyes and straightened her robe. He turned away from her and wiped his eyes, he didn't want her see his weakness. He turned back around and motioned for them to sit down on the couch. She followed him and sunk back down into the couch. Damon sat beside her, but not too close. He didn't know how much time he had with her, anymore. She didn't talk, just sat and stared at her fingers. Damon noticed that she looked like she hadn't slept in weeks, the dark circles under her eyes were proof of that. He placed his hand on top of her and gently squeezed her fingers. She looked up at him through tear brimmed eyes. He could tell that this wasn't the first time she'd cried over their seperation. Slowly, tentatively, he lowered his mouth to hers, tasting the tears that fell instantly. Then it happened, she finally broke down. She crumpled into his chest and sobbed. He pulled her into his lap and cradled her to his body.
Not going to lie, I'm a bit nervous about you're thoughts on this one. It took me hours to craft and even longer to write. So, if you'll do me the honor, review please. Review and I'll tell Elijah that you're on my list of people I love.
Song: Call Me by Shinedown
Disclaimer: I own nothing. Not TVD or Damon or Elena, just the idea for this fic. Let's be honest, if I owned Damon, he'd always be shirtless, or naked, either one works for me.
