The year was 2014 CE. It was mid-June in the city of Smash, the largest urban hub of the Mushroom Kingdom. It was a Tuesday night like any other. Or was it? Something big was going to happen, something that would change Smash's inhabitants, the Mushroom Kingdom, and the world itself, forever...

It was 8:03pm as Mario pulled the piping hot spaghetti out of the oven. He placed napkins and forks at the table, scooped the pasta onto plates, and poured himself a glass of iced coffee before sitting at the table. A lovely night with a lovely dinner and a lovely girlfriend like Princess Peach would usually have Mario in bright cheer, but he wasn't in the happiest mood this time.

"Mama mia," mused the plumber, "where could she be? Peach is usually here by 7:30, but right now she's thirty-three minutes late."

The clock struck 8:04.

"Make that thirty-four," he said, chuckling to himself.

Suddenly, a knock came from the door. Mario jumped out of the table, stomped to the door, and pulled it open to see a worried-looking Princess Peach.

"Where the heck have you been," Mario queried, "I've been waiting for half an hour, you be grateful dinner just got out of the oven now!" Mario could see that Peach was in tears and looked genuinely sorry, so he calmed down. "Look, Peach, you know I didn't mean to raise my voice with you, I was just worried you wouldn't come." Peach wiped her tears away.

"No, Mario," she said, "I needed to come. It's important I talk to you face to face about this.

Mario guided Peach to the dining room table, pulled the easy-prep garlic bread out of the toaster, and joined her at the dining room table. Peach had calmed herself down, but she still had something serious going on in her mind, and Mario could tell.

"Mario, something magical has happened," the pink princess whispered. Mario was on the edge of his seat. "Mario, I'm going to have a baby."

A single tear was shed from Mario's left eye. "Oh Peachy, this is wonderful! We can have you move in, or better yet I can move into your castle, let Luigi take this old dump-"

"There's more you need to hear, Mario." Peach raised her chin up a little, but her eyes drooped to the side, away from Mario's curious gaze. "Bowser, as you know, has kidnapped me countless times over the years."

"Yeah," Mario snarled, "that villanous lizard used to steal my girl away every other week, can't believe the police didn't do anything, but a man with his power-"

"Mario," Peach interupted, "he wasn't kidnapping me. It was all a ruse to hide our activities from you, to keep you from finding out, but I just can't keep up this affair any longer. Now that I'm with child, it's time I came clean." Mario was stunned.

"Princess," he muttered, "what are you trying to say?"

Peach broke down into tears. "I'm saying Mario, you're not that father. But that's why I'm here. To tell you that I love you, and that even if it's not your baby, I still want you to raise it with me. I learned the error of my ways, I've forgotten about Bowser, I just want to know if you'll ever forgive me."

The revelation hit Mario like a Bullet Bill to the heart: not knowing how to feel at first, until finally Mario screamed in rage, "You cheating bitch! How could you do this to me! After all I've done for you, after all that time I wasted trying to save you when you didn't need saving! Hell, I'm the one that needs saving, from you and your filthy lies. Get out! Get out of my house, I don't wanna see you ever again!"

Peach stumbled out of her chair and ran out the door and into the night. Mario walked to the door and watch her run down the cobblestone road and through the darkness. Just before she was out of sight, he screamed to her, "Oh yeah, I was fucking Rosalina on the side, if that makes you feel better about lying to me, you lying piece of taint!"

Mario walked to the table, picked up the plates, and poured the pasta into the sink.

. . . . .

It was a Friday afternoon in the Green Hill Skate Park. Sonic the Hedgehog and Kirby were having a chili dog break before going back to skateboarding. Sonic looked at the local newspaper as he feasted on his lunch. His eyes opened wider than usual at the big headline: Mushroom Kingdom's Power Couple Torn Apart

"Whoa, look at this, Kirby!" Sonic exclaimed as the pink puffball inhaled his fourth chili dog of the day. "You can't read since you're still a kid and all, so I'll read it aloud for you. 'Super' Mario, the Mushroom Kingdom's best plumber, has broken up with his girlfriend of thirty years, Princess Peach Toadstool! The princess commented it was due to her revealing her pregnancy to him!"

Kirby's big eyes glowed with concern as Sonic sighed, "Breaking up with your girl because you couldn't take responsibility? That's no good."

. . . . .

Mario was in bed, thinking about the harsh betrayal he had received several days before. He had gotten over things, but he only wished she hadn't told the newspapers they'd broken up. He didn't care that Peach had said the pregnancy was why she left, but he did care how she hadn't said it was Bowser's child and not his, so now he looked like he'd cast her out because he didn't want to pay child support. The town of Smash would be looking against him from now on. No matter, he thought to himself, he would go down to the printing press tomorrow and explain all. That's when he saw it.

A shadowy figure stood at the foot of Mario's bed. "Who the heck are you," Mario shivered. The figure replied in a seductive voice, "You shouldn't have lied to me, Mario."

Mario was startled to realize who stood before him. "Rosalina? How did you get in here, and at this hour? Actually, what did I lie about?"

"You said you loved me, that you were going to kill that slut and inherit her money, so we could live together. Instead, I find out you're boinking her, and got her knocked up."

Mario was profusely sweating, and tried to explain things. "Baby, you don't know the whole story-"

"You bet your overalls I don't know what's going on," Rosalina scoffed, "first you say you love me, and then I hear your girlfriend is having a kid. The fact we haven't even taken the condom off yet, I just can't stand it. But no matter, I've no reason to be mad at Peach anymore, I've made peace with her."

"Peace?" Mario asked the Rosalina still covered in shadow, "you mean you talked with her."

"I had a nice long chat with her that involved a lot of screaming, and her trying to say she wasn't pregnant with your baby, but instead of listening to her words, I decided to see what her body had to say, and I wasn't impressed."

Rosalina tossed something hot and wet on Mario's sheets. He sniffed it with his big fat nose, and determined what it was. It was a fetus. Mario vomitted all over his sheets and the fetus.

"You crazy bitch," he screamed, "you killed her! You cut her open and tore out the fetus! But why?!"

"I'm like you," Rosalina laughed, "I hate liars."

"But you don't understand," Mario panicked, "I'm not even the father! You can't kill me! Peach didn't need to die neither! You can't do this to-" His cries were cut off just like his head; with an ax.

Rosalina laughed with delight as blood spouted everywhere, but it and her hysteria died down. She walked out of the house, and returned twenty minutes later, with the hacked up body of Princess Peach. She pulled a fire flower from her purse, and set the house ablaze. As she let the flames engulf her, and the local fire crew came to put the fire out, little did the town of Smash know, that the Mushroom Kingdom, and the world itself, would soon change forever...

TO BE CONTINUED IN CHAPTER 2