A/N: If you have read my work then you should know what I'm into, and this story is no different. It does not have the Best start, but it may very well be redone. This is a first draft, so it kind of sucks...I'm working on it.

WARNING: WINCEST!!! And not in a very sexy way, in the twisted way (or maybe the sexy way if your perverce beyond comprehension) Gender-Swap (no sam and dean will not be doing the nasty...maybe...damnit). Rape. Deanabuse.


Dean should have known better, he always used to know better, he was twenty-one, it was a rookie mistake, a mistake that fifteen year old Dean would have made, and yet somehow he had, and now there was a price for his idiocy.

Sam couldn't stop laughing; you couldn't pay Sam to stop laughing at this point.

"Shut up Sammy, this is serious!" Dean was about ready to pound his little brothers face in.

But Sam couldn't stop. His brother was a girl, a very short, extremely skinny, and very angry. Girl.

Dean bit his lip, hating Sammy more at that moment then he ever had. Deep in his new guts he was scared, the Lemming had managed to bite him, getting its DNA altering salvia into his blood, it was a known fact that they did this, but there was no documented proof, mostly because it happened to men, and once it did, they would just up and disappear. There was no known cure, he could be stuck like this forever and Sam just kept laughing.

Sam did, however, stop laughing when he heard the bathroom door slam shut. It slowly dawned on him just how horrible he was being to Dean. He must have been scared, and yet here he was, laughing away.

"Dean?" Sam knocked on the door.

"Fuck off Sam!" Sam was thrown aback, his brother had yelled at him before, a lot before, almost every day, sometimes twice, but never like this. The words dripped with such venom that it nearly melted the walls.

Inside Dean had perched himself on the sink, curling up on the hard porcelain. He didn't want to stare at himself in the mirror, he wanted to pretend just a little longer, but his own reflection caught his eye, and it nearly made him cry.

"Mom…" Dean bit his lip as Sam hit the door some more. God hated him; he had to of, to do something like this, to him, why? It was so cruel.

"Dean, I'm sorry, I'll call dad okay, he's just out at a bar, he'll be here soon."

"No!" Dean hadn't wanted to open the door, nor had he meant to fall on his ankle while jumping off the sink, or be shaking.

Sam jumped back, the cell phone falling from his fingers, again he saw his new female brother, only this time it wasn't all that funny, it wasn't funny at all.

Dean opened and closed his mouth a few times before his new voice came out. "Just don't call him yet, okay?" It was high, he hated it.

No, not okay, Sam thought. "He's going to find out."

"I know, I know, I just…never mind…" Dean let his head hang, his new hair shadowing and covering his face. He liked that. His ankle hurt.

"Okay," Sam picked up the phone and closed it, setting it on one of the nightstands. He turned back to his brother, who looked so utterly defeated; it made him want to cry. His brother, who also seemed to be leaning heavily on the doorknob.

"Dean is your ankle all right?" Sam moved closer.

"No." Dean never told Sam these things, to Sam Dean was indestructible, could never be hurt, always got back up, but now, seeing him look so confused, so sickeningly small, it made Sam's fingers itch.

"Come sit down." Sam had expected Dean to pull away, like he always did, but he didn't, he followed, and sat down.

Sam felt odd taking Dean's shoe off, they were barely on as it was, his new feet were tiny.

Sam pulled the equally large socks off his brother's foot, and found, to his worry and relief, a sprained ankle.

Sam wrapped his brother up in silence; there were no words that could have been spoken, so they didn't speak.

Thirty minutes later Dean couldn't stop squirming.

"Dude, Dean, stop it." Sam pushed his brother, it was a mystery how they ended up on the same bed.

"I can't help it." Dean chose to keep his eyes on the TV, not wanting to look at his brother, the last thing he wanted to tell him was the truth.

Sam couldn't help it, he was a little mad when dad came back. Dean had finally relaxed some what, and with a barefaced entrance that consisted of dropping a weeks worth of groceries on the floor, Dean had managed to stiffen and cast his eyes back down again.

But it was what John said after seeing Dean, it was awful.

"Mary?" His voice broke over itself.

Sam had never seen such guilt on a persons face before. In his eyes Dean screamed, I'm sorry, I'm not mom, mom is dead, I'm me, only me, nothing better, I'm not what you want, I'm the last thing you want, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.

Sam noticed the way Dean leaned in closer to him, as though to try and shield himself from his fathers pain, to protect himself from the pain. To disapear.

"Dean?" John moved closer to the bed that held his two sons, tears shining in his eyes.

He was beautiful, just like she was beautiful.

"My god…you look…"

"I know." Dean still couldn't seem to look up. It hurt too much. Sam hadn't noticed, he'd been too worried, he'd been too scared, but now, he saw it, and it was everywhere.

"What-"

"It bit me."

"The lemming?"

"Yeah."

"Stand up."

Dean half expected a blow to the face the second he stood up, and was surprised beyond comprehension when his father had chosen to hug him instead. Old memories flooded Deans psyche, memories of once good times, even the bad times, when his father used to hug him, he couldn't remember the last time, but he vowed to remember this time.

Sam sat there, stunned, and deep down, scared. He didn't know why, but for some reason, he hated this hug.

John released his son and looked into his eyes, for the first time in a long time. But they weren't his son's eyes, and yet on his face was the biggest smile his sons had ever seen before, or could remember.


It's going to get better! I promis! And depending the the reviews (REVIEWS!!!) this MAY be a sam/dean fic. Anyways as you can see this isnt going to be some dumb gay "your a girl, lets touch eachother" fic, this is going to be realistic, and strangly erotic...reviews for me please!