Okay, so it's been a long time since I wrote anything, and even longer since I wrote a Gilmore Girls story. I'm finally over the disaster they called season 7 (it only took me 7 years) and am trying to dive back in. In this story, Rory attends Christopher and Sherry's baby shower alone, leaving Lorelai back home. This is ultimately a Luke and Lorelai story, and I hope you will share your thoughts. Enjoy!
The house felt empty.
As Lorelai sat on the couch, wrapped in a worn blanket and lost in the memories of her pregnancy, she could feel the sensations of loneliness and emptiness creeping up on her. She wasn't sure why she felt this way all of a sudden; Rory was a senior in high school and out of the house a lot. Although their relationship allowed for them to spend a lot of time together, Rory had friends and school and college applications that had kept her out of the house frequently, and Lorelai usually didn't mind spending a couple hours alone with her thoughts.
But this was different. Rory wasn't at the library for a couple hours working on homework or listening to Lane's band rehearse. She was two hours away in Boston, spending the weekend with Christopher and Sherry as they prepared for their baby. Lorelai's thoughts had been focused on Christopher for most of the day, remembering his reaction to her pregnancy with Rory and how he had reluctantly agreed to marry her and work for her father, as their parents had insisted upon. He had been as unenthusiastic about Lorelai's pregnancy as he now was enthusiastic about Sherry's.
She shouldn't take it personally. They had been kids when Rory had been born, and although she didn't regret a second she'd spent with her daughter, she had to admit that it had been terrifying and impossible at times. Christopher was older now, he'd made a career for himself and had a place to live. Now was the right time for him to have a baby, even if this one had been planned as much as Rory had been.
When Sherry had called to invite Rory to the baby shower, Lorelai could tell that her daughter was interested in going. Although Rory had been let down continuously by her father, she was a generous and caring person, and she was touched that her stepmother to be had included her in the planning process. After discussing it with Lorelai, she had called Sherry back and accepted the invitation, which had been extended by Christopher to an entire weekend visit.
It was good for Rory to spend time with Christopher, and Lorelai knew that he would take good care of their daughter. Although he hadn't been reliable or provided for them, she knew that Christopher loved Rory and was trying to repair the damage done from not being there for her when he should have been.
Lorelai reached for the remote to the television, hoping that the sound of some mundane reality TV show would distract her from the silence in the house. As she flipped through the options, she finally landed on a station broadcasting Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory and immediately stopped her channel surfing, realizing that the movie was still within its first half hour. Out of habit she leaned her head towards the kitchen and began to call for Rory, only halfway through the first syllable when she remembered that she was alone in the house.
With a deep sigh, Lorelai turned back to the television and settled into the couch, trying to focus on the movie and forget the fact that she was alone.
Twenty minutes later, after the blueberry scene that had always made Rory giggle uncontrollably as a child, Lorelai knew she couldn't stay in the house any longer. Without even thinking about where she could go, she clicked the TV off, jammed her feet into the closest pair of shoes and reached for her purse. It wasn't too late yet, and she knew that a walk into town and a cup of coffee would help her sort out her thoughts.
As she passed Babette's house and shoved her hands into her coat pocket, she could tell the fresh air was exactly what she needed. The further she got from the house, the better she felt about the fact that Rory wasn't home. It was a quick walk, and Lorelai found herself taking comfort in the memories that surrounded her as she walked. The sidewalk where Rory had fallen during her one and only attempt at riding a bike, the tree that she had climbed and refused to come down, causing Lorelai to attempt a not so graceful tree climb herself, and the small creek where Rory had come to read as a child all offered Lorelai comfort as she surrounded herself in the familiarity of the town she'd come to know as home.
The gazebo was beautifully lit with its Christmas tree lights as she passed, and she smiled as she stopped in the center of the town for a moment to admire its beauty. She'd stepped off the bus here as a seventeen year old mother with a baby and thirty dollars in her pocket, and she'd known immediately that this was a place for her to raise Rory. Seventeen years later, she was more sure than ever that it had been the best decision she'd ever made. Not only had she made a fairly decent living for Rory and herself, but she had given herself a home, a family of people she could count on no matter what, who had not only accepted her and Rory without judgment, but welcomed them as part of their town.
Taking a deep breath as she basked in the glow of her wonderful town, Lorelai resumed her walk, with her destination coming closer with every step she took. The diner was darkly lit and as she approached she could see that it was mostly empty. The closed sign hung in the door, but she reached for the handle anyway, relieved to find it unlocked as she gently pushed it open.
"We're closed," Luke's distracted voice came from the kitchen.
"I know," Lorelai called back, too weary to think of a comeback as she usually would. "I just…" she trailed off, not sure what she could say to explain what had drawn her here.
"Lorelai?" her name rang out from the kitchen and a moment later Luke appeared behind the counter. Lorelai offered him a small smile as she took in his backwards baseball cap and flannel shirt. She may have to adjust to Rory's absence in her house but she somehow knew that she'd never have to adjust to Luke leaving. He was always there, offering her coffee and a friend to tease and banter with. "Is everything okay?"
Lorelai snapped out of her thoughts as she stepped closer to the counter. "Yeah," she said. "I just went for a walk and ended up here. And since I'm here, you know what would be great?"
"It's nine thirty at night," Luke pointed out, but he had already placed a coffee cup on the counter for her.
"I know," she said, finally reaching the diner and placing her bag on the counter. "And I know you're closed, but I just kind of ended up here, so if it's okay, I'll take it to go."
"No, it's fine," Luke waved her off. "You're just lucky that I have some coffee left."
Lorelai smiled in gratitude as she lifted the cup to her lips and took a sip. "Thanks," was all she offered.
Luke turned to return the coffee pot to its rightful place, then turned to examine her carefully, hands placed on the counter in front of him.
"What?" Lorelai asked, feeling uncomfortable under her scrutinizing gaze.
"You're pretty quiet," Luke commented, leaning his elbows on the counter so he was eye level with her. "A sentence I never thought I'd say to you."
Lorelai smiled slightly as she traced an invisible line on the countertop. "Well, even I have my moments I guess," she said.
Luke nodded slowly, knowing that there was more to her unusually quiet mood but not pushing her to say more. "Okay," he said, pushing himself off the counter and moving to pick up a rag and wipe down the counter. "Where's that kid of yours?"
With that Lorelai placed her coffee cup on the counter and lowered her head, burying her face in her hands as she tried to fight off the hot sting of tears that were threatening to fall. Even the mention of Rory was enough to bring her to tears, something she hated. Especially in front of other people.
"Lorelai?" Luke looked up from his task when she didn't respond and dropped the rag on the counter. "What's wrong? Is Rory okay?" He was around the counter and at her side in a flash, sitting down on the stool beside her and resting a comforting hand on her shoulder.
Lorelai could hear the concern for her daughter in Luke's voice, and that made her heart swell. She shook her head as she tried to fight off the tears, which only made more develop under her eyelids. "Rory's fine," she managed to gasp out. "She's in Boston with Christopher."
A soft sigh of understanding came from beside her, and she felt Luke's hand move from her shoulder to her back, moving in small comforting circles. "I'm sure she's fine," he offered.
"She is," Lorelai sighed, finally blinking back the tears that hadn't managed to escape down her cheeks. "She called after she got to their apartment and said that she got there safely. Christopher was taking her out to dinner, and she was looking forward to spending some time in the city."
"That's good," Luke said. "It's…I'm sure she's glad to spend time with her dad."
"She offered to stay," Lorelai whispered. "She said she didn't have to go, that we could have a movie night and eat junk food. But I told her we could do that any other night."
"You do do that every other night," Luke commented.
Lorelai laughed slightly as she turned to face him. "You're right," she said, appreciating his attempt to lighten the mood. "And I know I'm being ridiculous. Rory's going to college in the fall and I should get used to this feeling. But it's just…"
"Lonely," Luke supplied.
Lorelai lifted her head to meet his eyes, surprised by the intensity of his concern and understanding for her emotions. "Yeah," she said. "Sherry's baby shower is tomorrow and I just keep thinking about how I wish I could have had a baby shower and the support of people around me. It's crazy, I know, because we were kids, but Christopher was never really excited about Rory. He was scared and not ready, but so was I and I never regretted it. He's so ready for this baby and I don't wish anything had happened differently with Rory, but I just wish it had been easier."
"That makes sense," Luke said.
"It does?" Lorelai asked.
"Yeah," Luke shrugged. "The guy was never there for you or Rory when you needed him, and now you're seeing him do everything you wanted with someone else. It's okay that you're upset."
"It's not that I want to be with him or anything," Lorelai commented. "I finally have the closure I need, and I know we're not right for each other. But I just wish I had someone to share it with. I have all these wonderful memories of Rory growing up, but I was the only one who was there. There wasn't anyone else there for her first word or her first day of kindergarten and sometimes I just wish I had someone to share them with. Besides her, I mean."
"So share them with me," Luke suggested.
"What?" Lorelai asked, turning to look at him again.
"Share those memories with me," Luke said. "I know Rory as well as I know you, and I'd love to hear some of those stories."
"Luke, you don't have to…" Lorelai started, touched all the same by his generosity.
"I want to," he insisted, standing and taking her arm to lead her to a table. "I'll be right back."
Lorelai could only stare as Luke turned back to the storeroom, disappearing behind the curtain that hid the storeroom from the diner customers. She wasn't sure what had just happened, but she knew that she had seen a side of Luke that she never had before. She'd known that he had a sensitive side to him; that had been evident when he'd built her a chuppah and made repairs around her house for nearly ten years. He was a compassionate man who had helped Rory bake a cake for mother's day their first year in their house and had taken in his nephew when his sister had needed him. But she had never seen him look at her with such understanding before, and she couldn't help but feel grateful to him for making sure she had someone to talk to.
"You look like you could use something a bit stronger than coffee."
Lorelai smiled up at Luke as he placed an already open bottle of beer in front of her. "Thanks," she said, taking a sip. "Tastes good."
"Good," Luke said, sitting down across from her and taking a swig of his own beer. "So tell me a story."
Lorelai thought for a moment, pulling at the label of her beer before she looked up at him with a small smile. "The first night we moved into our house," she said softly. "Rory was terrified. She was nine, and for as long as she could remember we had shared a double mattress in the potting shed behind the inn. She hadn't been to her grandparents' house yet, and she stood on the front lawn staring up at the house with huge eyes. When I finally asked her what she was thinking, she turned to me and said she never thought she'd live in a mansion."
Luke laughed, leaning back in his chair. "Did she know the place was practically falling apart?" he asked.
"I let her live in her fantasy," Lorelai shrugged. "We didn't have any furniture yet, so we shared a mattress on the living room floor. She stared up at the ceiling for a long time, then told me she never wanted to leave. She said she loved be there, just the two of us, and that we'd never need anyone else."
With a compassionate smile, Luke leaned forward and rested a hand on her arm. "Rory loves you, Lorelai, you know that," he said softly.
"Yeah, I do," Lorelai nodded. "I just wish she hadn't grown up so fast."
Luke nodded, not sure how to respond for a long moment. When the silence had overcome the diner for a moment too long, he leaned forward and asked, "Do you remember when Rory had to make that damn birdhouse?"
Lorelai laughed and took another sip of beer. "I don't think I'll ever forget," she said.
"When I came over to your house to bring you the wood and you supplied her with a hot glue gun I thought I was going to have a stroke," Luke rolled his eyes.
"Well, how was I supposed to know she'd need tools and nails and all that crap?" Lorelai asked.
"It was a project for her shop class," Luke argued. "Of course she'd need tools."
"Good thing Bert was in the truck," Lorelai said. "I'll never forget how you tried to supervise the two of us following that blueprint."
"I would have had a lot less repair work to do if you'd just listened to me in the first place."
"Please, you loved it," Lorelai said, leaning forward in her chair. "I saw you trying not to laugh when Rory asked if she could use the handle of the screwdriver as a hammer."
Luke smiled as the memory washed over him as well. "I'm just glad she didn't fail the class," he said.
"Thanks to you," Lorelai said. "I don't know if I've ever said this to you, Luke, but…thank you."
Luke blinked in surprise as he stared at her. "For what?" he asked.
"For being there," she said simply. "That house was so damaged when I bought it, and granted it still needs a lot of work, but it's livable because you were there to fix it. You let Rory do her homework here when I had to work late at the inn, and you made us food when she had the chicken pox. I can't even begin to remember all the things that you've done for us over the years, and I…I'm really grateful."
"It was nothing," Luke shrugged, looking down at the table.
"No, it was something," Lorelai insisted. "I couldn't have done it without you."
"Yes, you could have," Luke replied firmly. "I did as much as I could to help you out, but you would have made it. You're a strong woman, Lorelai, confident and determined, and you would have found a way to provide for Rory any way you could."
"I'd do it all over again," Lorelai said softly. "I think the only thing I would change would be running away from my parents' house sooner than I did."
Luke smiled softly. "You'll be okay, Lorelai," he said. "When Rory leaves for college. You'll have the inn and Sookie and the rest of the town."
"And you," Lorelai heard herself say the words before she knew what she was saying.
"Yeah," Luke said softly. "You'll have me."
They stared at each other for a long moment and Lorelai could feel her heart pounding in her chest. Luke was staring at her with such intensity that she thought he could see straight through to her soul, but she couldn't look away. Something was captivating about him, and she swallowed another sip of beer to calm her racing brain. After a moment she turned her gaze to look around the diner. "So um…any interesting gossip today?"
Luke cleared his throat as he tipped his own beer back. "How the hell am I supposed to know?" he asked.
"Come on, Luke, it's Friday," Lorelai said as if that were some sort of explanation.
"So?"
"So…" Lorelai sighed dramatically. "Everyone knows that Miss Patty has her weekly catch up with anyone who wants to hear the latest gossip on Friday afternoons."
"Doesn't mean I have to listen," Luke shrugged.
"Luke," Lorelai almost whined. "Come on, you know that it's your job to get all the gossip when I'm not here so I can know everything about what's going on in the town."
"Funny, I thought my job was to run a business and cook food for customers," Luke replied without a beat.
Lorelai looked at him closely for a moment, tilting her head to the side and not saying a word. Luke met her gaze evenly for a moment before he rolled his eyes and leaned forward.
"Okay, fine," he said. "But just one thing."
"Yes," Lorelai said excitedly, setting her empty beer bottle aside and leaning closer. "Spill."
"Well, apparently the Blanchards had a huge fight on the front lawn last night," Luke supplied. "Apparently she found out that he was having an affair."
"Hmmm," Lorelai mused. "I guess that's not too surprising. He did check me out once at Weston's."
"I guess she found a bunch of dresses that weren't hers in the closet," Luke continued. "Complete with heels and everything. Turns out that he's been cross dressing for years."
"No!" Lorelai gasped, reaching out to push his shoulder.
"Yeah, and this morning he ran away and joined the circus," Luke finished, leaning back in his chair and finishing the last sip of his beer.
Lorelai stared at him for a long moment then narrowed her eyes. "You just made that all up, didn't you?" she accused.
"Pretty much," Luke shrugged.
"Mean!" Lorelai gasped. "Here I was all captivated and you were lying to me the entire time."
"Consider it payback for the year you called me Duke just to annoy me."
Lorelai giggled. "That was fun," she said. "Duke."
Luke rolled his eyes as he reached for her empty beer bottle. "You want another?"
Lorelai thought for a moment, contemplating the option of having another beer and continuing their conversation or going home to her empty house. There wasn't much of a choice really, and she offered him a smile. "Another, please."
"I'll be right back," Luke nodded, disappearing into the storeroom.
Lorelai smiled slightly as she looked around the diner, letting more memories flood her as she sat alone in the restaurant. She and Rory had spent a lot of time here over the years, and she knew that despite his gruff exterior, Luke enjoyed having them as regulars.
"Thanks," she said as Luke sat down across from her again and pushed another beer towards her. She swallowed a sip as she smiled slowly at him. "You know for about a year Rory told me that she wanted to work here?"
"Yeah?" Luke asked, smiling slightly. "When?"
"When she was about ten," Lorelai smiled. "She said you had shown her around the kitchen and she liked all the activity."
Luke smiled as a memory began to wash over him. "I remember that day," he said.
"Really?" Lorelai asked. As close as she and Rory were, it was rare that someone else got to tell her a story about her daughter. "What happened?"
"Well, you were at the inn, and Rory had come here to get her homework done," Luke stated. "She finished pretty quickly, as usual, and I could tell she was bored. She said she didn't want to go home because it was too long a walk without you to entertain her, so I asked her if she wanted to see the kitchen. She was thrilled to be allowed behind the counter."
"And all these years you've been yelling at me for going behind the counter," Lorelai shook her head with disappointment. "I guess you like Rory better."
Luke laughed. "You got me," he said, shaking his head.
"Seems like a pretty common theme," Lorelai sighed, the smile fading from her face.
Luke frowned. "What are you talking about?" he asked.
Lorelai shrugged. She was silent for a moment before she looked up and saw him waiting patiently for an explanation. "It's stupid," she shrugged, trying to dismiss the topic.
"Hey," Luke said softly, causing her gaze to meet his again. "You can tell me anything, you know that."
Lorelai nodded slowly. "Yeah," she said. "Yeah, I do know that." She was silent for a few more moments and Luke allowed her to collect her thoughts, taking another sip of his beer as he waited patiently.
"I've never said this out loud before," Lorelai said, her eyes focused on peeling the label off of her beer bottle. "Even to Rory. Especially to Rory."
"Your secret's safe with me," Luke promised.
Lorelai smiled softly. "I know that," she said. She took a deep breath before she began. "These past couple years, Rory and I have been spending more time with my parents."
"I'm aware," Luke stated. He'd listen to many a post Friday night dinner venting sessions from Lorelai.
"Well, they've been so good to Rory," Lorelai continued. "Which is good, I guess. They're paying for Chilton and giving her recommendations to Yale, which I'm sure will help her get in."
"But…" Luke prodded gently when she trailed off after a few moments.
"But," Lorelai sighed. "She didn't have much contact with them until she was fifteen. And I got pregnant when I was fifteen, and sometimes I just feel like…they're picking up where they left off with me. Like I disappointed them by not finishing high school and going to college and getting married to a banker before I had a baby. I feel like they only put up with me so they can see Rory. Like they love her more than they ever loved me."
Luke stared at her with surprised eyes, not sure what to say in response to such a deep and intimate story.
"You don't have to say anything," Lorelai shook her head. "I know it's stupid, but I'm just in a weird mood tonight. But there it is…my deep and dark secret. You now know more about Lorelai Gilmore than I'm sure you ever wanted to know."
"Lorelai," Luke said her name so reverently that it sounded like a prayer. "I'd listen to anything you want to share with me."
The swelling of her heart returned at his words and she swallowed hard as her emotions began to get the best of her. She wasn't sure what was happening, but the way Luke was staring at her and allowing her to confide in him was making her feel emotions she'd never experienced before.
She was silent for a moment before she took a deep breath and moved her gaze from the table to him. "What about you?" she asked.
"What about me?" Luke responded with narrowing eyes.
"Well, we've spent over an hour talking about me and my personal baggage," Lorelai said. "What about you? You can tell me things too, you know."
Luke nodded slowly as he took another sip of his beer. "You know pretty much all there is to know," he shrugged.
"Hey, I'm not going to force you to tell me anything," Lorelai responded gently. "But I just want you to know…you've been so wonderful about letting me tell you things, and you can talk to me too. I know I have a big mouth but I can keep a secret."
"I know you can," Luke sighed, playing with his beer bottle. "I'm just not used to…you know…"
"What?" Lorelai prodded after a moment.
"Having someone to…to talk to," Luke said uncomfortably.
Lorelai nodded in understanding. "I know," she sighed. "But if you want to, I'm here. Even after tonight, if you want."
"Thanks," Luke said.
Lorelai smiled and looked down at her watch. It was nearing eleven thirty, and she knew she had to go home. But something was pulling her to stay, telling her that the longer she stayed here in the comfort of the diner having a warm conversation with Luke the longer it would take to return to her empty house.
She was opening her mouth to announce her departure when Luke's voice came before hers.
"She gave me a father's day present once."
Lorelai blinked as she processed his words, trying to find meaning behind the one simple sentence and why he was sharing it with her.
"Who?" she finally asked.
"Rory," he supplied.
"I…what?" Lorelai completely dumbfounded by the confession. "When?"
"She was ten," Luke supplied. "You'd been here for about a year and she came in after school one day. I guess they'd done some sort of project in school for father's day."
Lorelai rolled her eyes. Every year she'd made it clear to Rory's teachers that she was a single mother and to please provide Rory with a different assignment when it came to father's day. She'd always assumed that they had followed her simple request, but she was finding herself doubtful after Luke's confession.
"I guess Christopher was supposed to come visit the week before, for father's day," Luke was saying. "But for some reason or another he didn't make it."
"Yeah, that was a pattern when Rory was younger," Lorelai confirmed.
"Well, she said she'd written a poem for him to put on his desk," Luke continued. "And when he didn't show she threw it in the garbage. But she came in with some long ramble about holidays and how you said that no holiday should go uncelebrated and that you once made her dress like a maple tree for Arbor Day and wear an ugly sweater with flags on it for Flag Day…I'm not sure exactly what else she said, but the bottom line was that she didn't want Father's Day to go uncelebrated."
"So she made you a present," Lorelai shook her head. "That kid never ceases to amaze me."
"Hang on," Luke held up a finger before he turned towards the stairs, leaving Lorelai stunned and confused as she processed the story Luke had just told her. Rory had never let on that she thought of Luke as any more than a friend who treated them with kindness and generosity and the frequent occasion to mock him. But she was learning things about her daughter tonight that she'd never thought she'd hear, and she wasn't sure how to process the information.
"Here," Luke handed her a folded piece of paper as he appeared at the table again. "I…I kind of kept it."
"All these years?" Lorelai asked.
Luke shrugged with an embarrassed smile and tipped his beer bottle toward the paper. "Read it."
Lorelai unfolded the paper and looked down at a poem, written in Rory's familiar handwriting, a bit messier and larger by her ten year old hand. The paper was worn and the blue lines slightly faded, but the words Rory had written nearly eight years ago were still very present.
Luke Danes
A poem by Rory Gilmore
My mom calls him the diner man
He helps us out whenever he can
We always ask for burgers and fries
And no matter what he always complies
Luke's always nice and he gives me advice
When I ask for help, he never thinks twice
Sometimes I look at Luke as a dad
Just like the one I never had.
"Oh my God," Lorelai clasped a hand over her mouth as she read the poem again, and then a third time. "I can't…I can't believe she wrote this.
Luke swallowed hard as he nodded. "I know it's only because she didn't want the holiday to go uncelebrated, but you know…she's…I…I've watched her grow up," he said softly. "She's like…well, I love her."
Lorelai nodded slowly, trying to fight back the tears that were threatening to fall. "I know you do," she said softly. "Luke, I…I can't believe you never showed this to me before."
"I don't think Rory wanted anyone else to know about it," Luke said softly. "When she gave it to me she said that she hadn't told you and even back then the two of you were basically of one mind, so I figured there was a reason she didn't say anything to you."
Lorelai nodded as she slowly handed the paper back to him. "I'm not mad, I just…I feel like I'm finding out things about my own daughter that I never even knew," she said.
"Rory's a smart kid," Luke observed. "She's always wanted to see you happy. She knows that you love her, but I think she knows you've always been a little lonely."
Lorelai stared at him, a look of shock covering her face. "Why, Luke Danes, you've been holding out on us," she stated. "What, do you moonlight as a shrink?"
Luke gave an embarrassed shrug. "No, I don't buy into all that crap," he said. "I just… you're here a lot and I go to your house to fix things, and I notice stuff."
"What kind of stuff?" Lorelai asked.
"Nothing bad," Luke shook his head. "Just…how you seemed to want to make things fit with Max even when they weren't quite right. And how hurt you are every time Christopher flew through town for five minutes. And how you would give anything up for Rory but want someone to be there for you when she's ready to go to college and have a life apart from you."
"Luke, I…" Lorelai trailed off, knowing that it was her turn to speak but not sure what to say in response to Luke's analysis of her life.
"I know it probably sounds crazy that I'm saying all this, but I like to think we're friends," Luke stated. "Even though you seem to take pleasure doing everything you can to drive me crazy. And I want to be there for you."
"You are," Lorelai said. "Every time I need you, you're there. Just like tonight."
Luke offered her a compassionate smile. "You'll always know where to find me," he said.
"Yeah," Lorelai said, holding his gaze. "I guess I do."
They stared at each other for a long moment, neither one of them wanting to break the spell cast over the small table near the window of the diner. Lorelai could feel her emotions threatening to take over as she thought about Luke's words and the way she had been able to confess things to him she'd never told anyone before. She thought of Rory's poem and the way Luke and spoken of her daughter as if she were his own, and she knew without a doubt that Luke would do anything to protect Rory and keep her safe.
"I um…I should go," she finally whispered. "It's pretty late, and I know I've probably kept you up way later than usual."
"No, it's…I enjoyed it," Luke said, watching her pull her coat on. "I hope you're feeling better."
"I am," Lorelai promised as she pulled her hair out of the collar of her coat and reached for her purse. "I…thank you. For everything."
"Anytime," Luke said as he stood, and she knew that he meant it. He glanced out the window and then frowned back at her. "Where's your car?"
"Oh, I walked," Lorelai brushed him off as she walked towards the door. "Fresh air and all."
"There's no way you're walking back," Luke shook his head as he moved towards the coat rack. "I'll drive you."
"Luke, really, it's…"
"It's not okay," Luke shook his head. "Lorelai, it's almost one in the morning. There's no way in hell I'm letting you walk through town."
"Fine," Lorelai rolled her eyes. "But you're just lucky I'm too lazy to argue right now."
"Words I never thought you'd say," Luke muttered as he reached for his car keys.
"Hey, I'm doing you a favor here, burger boy," Lorelai shot back as he paused to lock the door to the diner.
"Really?" Luke asked, glancing over at her. "And how's that?"
"Duh," Lorelai said as she climbed into the passenger side of his truck. "When was the last time you had a beer and hung out with a friend?"
"Longer than I'd like to admit," Luke sighed.
"So there you go," Lorelai nodded. "Favor. Getting you out of your routine and putting some spice in your life."
"There's plenty of spice in my life thanks to your rambles," Luke replied.
"But this time there was beer," Lorelai said.
"Yeah, there was that," Luke said, glancing at her out of the corner of his eye.
Lorelai smiled as he pulled into her driveway and put the truck into park. "Thanks, Luke."
"No problem," he said. "I wasn't about to let you walk home."
"Not just for the ride," Lorelai shook her head. "I…I was feeling pretty horrible earlier and it was really nice to have a friend to talk to."
Luke nodded. "I'm glad I can help."
"You did," Lorelai said. "Well…night."
"Night," Luke replied.
Lorelai turned to open the passenger door, but paused, biting her lower lip as she looked down at her lap.
"Lorelai?" Luke prompted her, leaning forward to try to look at her face.
Without a word, Lorelai turned quickly and scooted across the bench seat, wrapping her arms tightly around Luke's neck. He paused for a moment before he slowly wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her close and breathing in the scent of her hair. Lorelai rested her head on his shoulder for a moment, closing her eyes in silent gratitude of everything Luke had done for her that night.
As quickly as she'd moved to embrace him, Lorelai pulled back and opened the door of the truck. "Bye Luke."
She moved up the porch steps without looking back and unlocked the front door, turning to give Luke a small wave as she stepped into the house.
Once the door was closed behind her Lorelai dropped her purse and coat on the floor, then moved to check her answering machine. She saw a blinking light and pressed play, biting her thumbnail as she listened to Rory's voice fill the room.
"Hey, Mom, I just wanted to say hi. Dad and I went to Harvard Square for dinner and I saw that street corner where you asked some random person if Harvard was famous, which made me laugh. I have Sherry's shower tomorrow, but not until two, so I'll try you again in the morning." There was a pause before Rory's message continued. "I love you, Mom. I'll talk to you tomorrow."
Lorelai smiled as she pressed the play button again, glad to hear that Rory sounded like she was having a good time. She was sorry she'd missed her call, but she felt much better than she had earlier. As she headed up the stairs to bed, she replayed her conversation with Luke in her head, now alone with her thoughts to begin processing the emotions she hadn't been able to recognize at the diner.
She prepared for bed using her routine habit, now seeing Luke in each of her actions. She thought of him fixing her dresser drawers as she pulled her pajamas out of the top draw, she thought of their conversation about Rory and Jess as he'd fixed her faucet while she brushed her teeth. And as she settled into bed and reached to set the alarm for the following morning she thought of the dream she'd had of being married to Luke and being pregnant with his twins.
Somehow everything in her house was somehow connected to Luke, and she felt her spine tingle as she remembered the way he'd stared at her that evening, like he completely understood her every thought and only wanted to make her feel better.
When she had been engaged to Max, Rory had mentioned in passing that Luke had a thing for her. At the time, Lorelai had dismissed it, but she couldn't deny the feeling of disappointment she'd felt when Luke had accepted the news of her engagement with congratulations and a smile. After that, she'd thought Rory's comment had been inaccurate, and pushed the memory aside. But now she couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to have even more Luke in her life.
Suddenly she was back in the potting shed she'd lived in for years, the small room behind the Independence Inn where she and Rory had both grown up. Rory was a year old and sitting on a blanket, babbling to her teddy bear, the only toy she could claim as her own. Lorelai was standing beside the small table in the corner, slicing some cheese into cubes for a snack.
After a moment she heard Rory call, "Mommy!" and turned to find her daughter standing on the blanket, teetering gently as she tried to find her balance.
"Good job, babe," Lorelai said, setting the knife aside and kneeling on the ground. "You can do it. Come here to Mom."
Tentatively, Rory placed one foot in front of her, arms outstretched for balance as she focused solely on her task. Lorelai beamed proudly as Rory made her way towards her and then fell into her open arms.
"Look at you!" Lorelai exclaimed, hugging Rory close to her. "I'm so proud of you, hon."
Rory giggled as she nuzzled Lorelai's neck. Suddenly both of them turned towards the door at the sound of it opening and Luke stepped in.
"How are my girls?" Luke asked with a wide smile, stepping closer to them. He placed a hand on Lorelai's waist and leaned in to kiss her softly before he took Rory from her arms, holding her over his head as she giggled wildly.
"We're good," Lorelai said with a smile as she leaned in to tug on Rory's foot. "Someone just walked for the first time."
"Really?" Luke asked turning to the small girl in his arms. "Good job, beautiful."
Lorelai smiled as she watched Rory nuzzle into Luke's neck, completely trusting this man to hold her and care for her. As she turned to return to her task of preparing a snack, she couldn't help but hear a single word come from Rory's lips.
"Daddy."
Lorelai woke with a start, sitting up straight in bed and breathing heavily as she took in her surroundings. She was no longer in the potting shed but in her bedroom, surrounded by a pile of blankets and furniture that never would have been able to fit into the tiny room Rory had grown up in. She swallowed hard as she took in the sun streaming from the window and turned to look at her clock.
9:16. She wasn't sure she would be able to go back to sleep after a dream like that, and she swung her feet over the side of her bed before reaching for her robe. She tied the robe tight around her waist as she moved towards the kitchen, bringing the coffee pot to life as she moved through the kitchen.
She stared at the water dripping through the filter as she thought about what she could do today. It was Saturday, and she and Rory usually spent the weekend mornings at Luke's lingering over breakfast and coffee before they lazily made their way home to lounge in front of movies and mockery. She supposed she could still follow that routine, but she wasn't sure how she felt about seeing Luke after their evening and the dream she'd had the previous night.
Before she could make up her mind, Lorelai heard the phone ring and immediately reached for it. "Hello?"
"Hi, Mom," Rory's voice chirped on the other end.
"Who's this?" Lorelai asked.
"Jessica Simpson," Rory replied, not skipping a beat.
"Oh good, I've had a lot of questions for you," Lorelai said seriously. "First of all, do chickens really live in the sea?"
"Obviously, that's why they call it tuna," Rory said.
Lorelai laughed. "I miss you, kid," she said. "How's Boston treating you?"
"Pretty well," Rory replied. "Dad and I went out to dinner just the two of us last night."
"It's good that you're able to get some time alone with him," Lorelai said.
"Yeah, it was nice," Rory said. "Although he didn't think it was funny when I ordered the pasta special and then asked them to remove everything except the noodles."
Lorelai laughed. "Hon, you know we can only do stuff like that to Luke," she said. "Other people aren't as good natured about it as he is."
"I learned the hard way," Rory agreed. "I tried calling you last night."
"I got your message," Lorelai acknowledged. "I was actually at Luke's."
"Really? I called pretty late because I thought you'd be home from Friday night dinner by then."
"I know," Lorelai sighed as she poured herself a cup of coffee and walked into the living room. "Surprisingly, your grandmother gave me the night off once she knew that you were in Boston with your dad, so I had the night to myself. I was a little lonely so I took a walk and just kind of ended up there."
Rory was silent on the other end and Lorelai tapped the phone with her finger. "Hello?"
"I'm here," Rory said quietly. "Mom, I'm sorry you were lonely. I knew I shouldn't have come. I can see about getting a train or a bus back…"
"Absolutely not," Lorelai interrupted her. "Rory, it's important that you spend time with your father. And you're going to be going to college soon, so I'm going to need to get used to an empty nest."
"I know, I just hate that you're alone," Rory said, and Lorelai could hear the worry in her voice.
"I love you for that," Lorelai said. "But Luke was right when he said it's good for me to have some time to adjust to you being away."
"You and Luke talked about me?" Rory sounded surprised.
"Yeah," Lorelai pushed her socked foot against the edge of the coffee table. She wasn't sure how much to disclose to Rory and finally decided to say a simple, "We talked about a lot of things."
"Luke?" Rory repeated. "Luke Danes? Luke 'stop talking and order' Luke?"
Lorelai laughed at Rory's disbelief. "That Luke," she confirmed. "He's actually pretty sweet when he wants to be. I think it helped that it was just the two of us and the diner was closed."
"Wow," Rory was obviously impressed. "So I need details. Did he bear any secrets behind his mystique?"
Lorelai's mind flashed to her promise not to share any of Luke's secrets and the poem he'd shared with her. "Um…not really," she said. "It was mostly just me whining about my quiet house."
"Oh," Rory said. "Well, I just wanted to say hi. Dad and I are going to run out in a few minutes to pick up some cupcakes for the shower and then I have to help set up."
"Okay, but remember when you're surrounded by all those pregnant mothers not to take after your mother."
She could practically hear Rory rolling her eyes. "Right, Mom," she placated. "I'll try to resist the temptation."
"Good girl," Lorelai said. "Have fun today. And make sure you remember any really juicy details so you can tell me in full detail later."
"Of course," Rory said solemnly. "I have to go, Dad's out of the shower. I'll be home tomorrow afternoon."
"Can't wait," Lorelai smiled. "Bye hon. I love you."
"Love you too," Rory returned before the line went dead.
Lorelai downed the last of her coffee and then set the empty cup on the coffee table before she moved towards the stairs intent on taking a shower. She would head to the diner a bit later and then maybe head into Hartford to do some shopping. It would be nice to have some new clothes for the upcoming springtime season.
As she stepped into her bathroom she turned the water on and dropped her clothing haphazardly onto the floor. She caught sight of herself in the mirror and turned to examine her body closely, smiling slightly in approval. Although she knew she did not eat well and received daily reminders from Luke of that fact, her body did not seem to be effected. She hadn't even had to work hard to lose her pregnancy wait all those years ago; living in a potting shed and only being able to afford food for her daughter had ensured that she would lose all the weight.
She turned to the side and briefly wondered what Luke would say if he saw her like this. She shook her head quickly as if to shake the thought away and stepped under the warm stream of water that soothed her muscles from the tension she'd been feeling the day before.
The image of Luke seeing her naked refused to leave her mind and she engaged the thought, wondering what he would look like without his standard flannel and jeans. She'd seen him at the lake in his swimming trunks and knew she'd like most of what she saw. With a blush, she knew she'd probably appreciate the rest of his body just as much.
With a sigh, Lorelai forcefully pushed the image out of her mind as she turned the water off and reached for a towel, wrapping it around her body before she wrapped her hair in another towel. She wandered to her bedroom and began the long task of finding something to wear. It was always a process to find an outfit, but with the way her mind was thinking about Luke this morning, she couldn't help but want to wear something the tiniest bit flirty.
After finally deciding on a dark blue blouse and tight jeans, Lorelai turned to her dresser for her best push up bra and a cute pair of underwear, feeling somewhat ridiculous.
He's not going to notice what you're wearing. She told herself as she dressed, but she didn't care. Luke might not notice, but she would know that she was looking a little bit nicer than usual today.
After blow drying her hair and applying make up, Lorelai looked in the mirror and nodded in approval. She looked pretty damn good, if she did say so herself. She returned to her bedroom and reached for a pair of boots, sliding them on under her jeans and then moving towards the stairs.
As she passed the answering machine on her way to fill up another cup of coffee for the road, Lorelai noticed the answering machine blinking. With a frown, she reaching out to press play, wondering who she could have missed in the half hour she'd been in the shower. She'd already talked to Rory today, and she said a silent prayer that it wasn't her mother trying to guilt trip her after their missed Friday night dinner the evening before.
"Hey, Lor," Christopher's voice rang through the house, causing Lorelai to freeze and fear to spread through her entire body. "I um…give me a call the second you get this. It's urgent."
His message was brief and distant, as if he was distracted by something going on around him. Lorelai stood frozen in her place for a long moment, trying to work up the strength to grab the phone and call him back. She'd just spoken to Rory, and Christopher was having a baby shower today. He wouldn't be calling her unless something was wrong, and she wasn't sure she wanted to know what was wrong.
She wasn't sure how long she stood frozen in the middle of the hallway, staring at the answering machine and her hand hovering over the play button. Suddenly, she snapped into action and ran into the living room to grab the cordless phone, dialing Christopher's cell phone number on pure adrenaline.
"Lorelai?" his voice answered on the first ring and confirmed her suspicions that something was wrong.
"Chris," she gasped. "What's wrong?"
Christopher paused for a moment and he cleared his throat. "I hate to tell you this, Lorelai, especially when you're alone in the house…" he started.
"Christopher, please," she begged. "I can tell something's wrong, and if you don't tell me right now I'm going to jump through the phone cord and strangle it out of you with my bare hands."
"I'm here at the hospital," Christopher said flatly. "There was an accident."
"Accident?" Lorelai repeated, panic rising in her. "What kind of accident? Is Rory there? Let me talk to her!"
"She's…she's in the ER," Christopher replied. "We were heading to the bakery to pick up the cupcakes and some idiot ran a red light. She got banged up pretty badly, Lor."
Lorelai felt her heart stop beating as she sank onto the couch. "How badly?" she asked.
"Lor…"
"How bad?" she insisted loudly.
"They hit her side of the car," Christopher murmured. "Her right leg is broken and they have her in for a neurology exam right now."
"Neu…neurology," Lorelai repeated, her brain swirling with this newfound information. "Her head?"
"She banged it pretty badly," Christopher paused. "She was only in and out of consciousness as the EMTs loaded her into the ambulance."
Lorelai gasped as she felt a sob shudder through her body, begging for air. "I'm on my way," she said.
"Lorelai, maybe you should call someone to…"
"I'm on my way," she repeated forcefully. "Call my cell phone as soon as you know anything at all."
"I will," Christopher promised. "She's in testing now, but I promise I won't leave her side, Lor. She's going to be okay."
"Just…just tell her I love her," Lorelai requested quietly. "Please. Tell her I love her and I'm on my way as soon as I can."
"I will," Christopher promised. "We're at Mass Gen. I'll see you soon."
"Take care of her," Lorelai whispered, and soon the line went dead.
Lorelai sat frozen on the couch, phone still resting against her ear as she processed the information. Rory, her baby, had been in an accident. She had a broken leg and was in and out of consciousness. She was two hours away and having neurology tests and Lorelai wasn't there for her.
As if acting on impulse, she lowered the phone and dialed a phone number on autopilot, not even thinking as she acted.
"Luke's."
Lorelai tried to find the words to respond to the gruff voice that answered, but couldn't find the ability to speak.
"Hello?" Luke tried again, but she still couldn't form words. "Look, I'm trying to run a business here, so if you think…"
"Luke," she managed to strangle his name out. "I…I…"
"Lorelai?" his voice immediately softened and adapted a concerned tone. "What's wrong? Are you okay?"
Lorelai shook her head as sobs shook through her body. She knew Luke couldn't see her over the phone and she tried again to find words and explain what was wrong. "Rory," she choked out. "I…Rory."
"I'm on my way." With that Luke hung up the phone and Lorelai was again left alone on her couch, clutching her phone as she allowed the events of the morning to sink over her.
Suddenly snapping into action, she reached for her purse and searched through the drawers of her desk for Rory's insurance information. She moved to Rory's bedroom and grabbed her favorite books and then shoved her favorite pair of pajamas into a duffel bag. She quickly moved towards the front door, pulling it open just as Luke raised his hand to knock.
The sight of someone to lean on, someone to care for her, caused Lorelai to lost the temporary focus she had had and she burst into tears before she could say a word. Wordlessly, Luke reached out to wrap her in a hug and she clutched onto the flannel of his shirt as she allowed the sobs to overcome her body.
"Rory," was all she managed to sob by way of explanation. "Rory…"
Luke rocked her gently for a moment, rubbing slow and soothing circles on her back, knowing that she needed to break down before she could offer him a proper explanation of what was going on.
After what seemed like a century, Lorelai pulled back and looked up at Luke, whose concern and fear could not be hidden from his eyes. "Rory," she said again, wiping tears from her eyes. "She was in a car accident. I have to go to Boston, I have to go…"
"Whoa," Luke grabbed her arm tightly, preventing her from walking towards the jeep. "Rory was in a car accident? Is she okay?"
"I don't know," Lorelai gasped. "I don't…I don't know. Christopher called and said she has a broken leg and her head…she's in for tests and I have to go. Let me go!"
"You're not driving anywhere," Luke said firmly, pulling her away from her jeep.
"Luke let me go!" she insisted loudly. "Rory needs me, I have to go to her!"
"You do," he said, steering her to the passenger side of his truck. "And I'm going with you."
