Warnings: 7Sins Continuity, 2nd person Colt PoV, Implied Slash (Colt/Punk), Profanity. No actual written fanfiction is referenced in this. - Copious author's notes at the end, feel free to read them. :)


"Punkers, sit down." You grab his sleeve and stop his pacing. If he's going to read fanfiction on the podcast, he's going to have to actually read the damn stuff, not try to wear a hole in your damn carpet. "What's up with you anyway?" You throw an arm around his shoulders, hauling him closer and feeling his head flop onto your shoulder.

"Nothing, well, no, nothing." You look at him. "NOTHING, Cabana. C'mon, get on with it." You shrug and open the website.

"Where do you think wrestling is?" You possibly should have thought this through better or at least tried to Google the wrestling section.

"TV Shows?" He mutters, tucking his legs up, leaning against you more heavily. You click TV shows and feel him tense beside you.

"What?" You glance at the top of his head.

"Why is Glee first and Supernatural second?" He sounds mildly pissed off.

"Uh, no idea Punkers." You mutter, squeezing his shoulder.

"Have these people never heard of the alphabet? It should be A's first! Not fucking Glee." Okay, your best friend is one of those moods, you can see this going so horribly so quickly.

"Ah-ha, look, it's in order of how many, uh, stories there are written about it!" You feel quite proud for working that out and click the little W, assuming that if wrestling is in here, it'll be under that.

"Not here." Punkers mutters after a few seconds. "Who the fuck is writing Waltons fanfiction? Click it! I wanna see!" He demands, you shake your head and do as he asks. "What's the highest rating?" He asks after the page loads.

"Uh." You click the little button marked filters and up pops a menu. "M."

"Click it!" He sounds gleeful, squirms so that his arms are wrapped around your waist and his legs tucked up Indian style, his too pointy chin digging into your shoulder slightly. "Rape? In the Waltons? Urgh, that is just plain wrong."

"Yup, back?" He nods and you click the back button till you're on the TV shows main listing page again. "S?"

"Why?" He asks you.

"Sports entertainment?" He groans but doesn't argue.

"Saved by the Bell, Scrubs, Spin City, Sports Night. No Sports Entertainment. Where next, Cabana?" You shrug and come back to the top page. The list of sub-genres isn't too helpful really. "Miscellaneous?"

"May as well." You say clicking it. "Ah-ha!

"Thirty-five thousand. Fuck me." He mutters.

"Later, gotta get this intro done first." You grin at him and turn to give him a quick peck on the nose.

"Fuck you!" He snaps.

"Maybe." He bites your ear and you're sorely tempted to return the favour but wisely decide against it.

"So?" He starts but doesn't finish, you click the filters button, getting the little pop-up menu again. "Rating?" He asks after staring at the screen for a while.

"M, of course." You reply. If you're going to do this, you're going to do it properly!

"Characters?" He definitely sounds nervous.

"Me! My podcast, I should get to be in it." You tell him firmly. "And I guess you; I mean you're reading it after all."

"Never in my life, have I wanted to see the phrase zero results, more than now." He mutters, there aren't many results but there are more than you'd like. You scroll through, clicking one at random and start reading. You get as far as story you shoving his cock into story Punkers without any kind of lube, wincing at the thought of the pain little story Punk must be in before clicking back. He's tense beside you, his arms squeezing you tightly, painfully almost, you'd never do that to him. You stroke his arm softly, brushing your lips over his hair. He still seems tense though, so you try words.

"You know I'd-"

"CAN YOU FUCKING BELIEVE THE TYPOS?" You twist in his arms to look at him. "How many times can you fuck up the English language in one sentence?"

"Uh." You're not quite sure what to say to that, he's still ranting indignant about split infinitives and misused commas and you have no idea what the hell he's talking about. "Maybe this isn't such a good idea, Punkers." You say mildly, trying to pry his ever tightening arms from around you. "How bout we do something else? Hmm, something with less homowhatits," You manage to get him to loosen his grip a little and breathe a sigh of relief.

"How about Jumpin Jeff Farmer's promo?" He says eventually.

"Great idea, excellent idea!" You close the tab and open a new Google one instead, typing in Farmer's name, trying to find a transcript of the worst promo ever.

"Oh, Cabana." He says, his voice casually soft, as you scroll through pages of results.

"Hmm?" You turn to look at him, a lazily amused grin on his face.

"You ever try fucking me without lube, I'm shoving my foot up your ass."


I have lots of random scenes that are never going to actually fit into a full story but I rather like so I figured, I'm awake, when I really should be asleep, may as well post my favourite of them in a little holdall fic header. Will be updated as and when I'm feeling insomniac.

I love fanfiction but what we do is rather silly and I love fics where the people we write about find it. No matter what you write, it's a creative expression of your love and admiration of the people you write about, from het to slash, to well-rounded, well researched fics to the trashy written in five minutes ones, OCs to kayfabe constructs, it's all a display of apperciation. I think sometimes, I am rather guilty, like all of us, of seeing the splinter in the eyes of other writers whilst failing to see the log in my own. Write well and write often my fellow wrestling fans, even if I don't read your stuff or even worse I do and I don't review (I'm sorry, I know I should review more, I'm a bad person but I'm working on it, promise!), I love knowing you're out there working hard to show your love for the guys and gals who bring us fantastic entertainment each and every week. I'll get off this soapbox now. :)

Reviews are always good so you know, leave one in the box!

Something you've always wanted someone to write for Punk and Cabana, or someone else even, lemme know and I take a stab at it. ;)