Hello Everyone. First I would like to thank you for clicking on this story!
Next I would like to warn you about this story: This story includes multiple mini-plots, death, drinking, mature language, mature content (in other words lemons), YAOI, whoring, molesting, mafias, and a few OC's (NOT an OcxCountry story! NO OCxCOUNTRY!) This will be changed to M by chapter 2 or 3 I think.

This story is a RP by me and my awesome friend Dylain who does the awesome Russia and others. I'm the horribly OOC Pru-chan (just wait. It gets worse). We started it as a one-shot to hook Prussia and Russia up (her OTP that I now love) and now...well Its turned into a full fledged insane story about their relationship. I'm posting it cause we thought someone out there might have liked it and might be able to give us feedback! It's not the best I admit but its also not the worst so...
Disclaimer: We do not own Hetalia. Only this insane story X3


Russia ran down the halls at full speed, tears streaming down his cheeks, looking for a classroom that wasn't locked. It was late after school, and most classrooms were either filled with people or locked and empty. Russia finally found one room that appeared to be empty, and he slipped in and closed the door behind him, quickly jumping under a desk just as Belarus opened the door and said, "Brother! Where are you?" He silenced his whimpering and focused on being quiet - but it was rather cramped under that desk, due to his abnormal height.

"He's not here." Prussia said, glaring at the ceiling as he lolled in a chair with his head tilted back, expression showing he was annoyed by Belarus's loud screeching. "I think I heard him running down the west hall," he said, turning to the side to face away from the door.

Belarus glared at him for a minute, then slammed the door behind her as she ran out. "BROTHER!"

Russia slowly slipped out from under the desk and looked at Prussia. 'Why did he even protect me, of all people? Gah- Stupid, apologize!' "S-Sorry, I didn't know you were in here, Prussia..." He sniffed and rubbed his nose. "Sorry."

"Don't apologize, the awesomeness of my ninja skills make it so that no one notices me," the albino said, lifting an arm to rub at his temples. 'Stupid headaches. Stupid bitches. Stupid commie. I hate my life' "I don't get why you hide from her all the time. Yeah, she's a little nuts, but she's hot." Gil added as an afterthought.

Russia sighed. "Nothing good can come from us being together, plus- she's my sister!" He stood and shook his hair, tightening his scarf around his neck, as it had loosened while he was running.

"So no incest for the commie?" Gilbert asked, finally turning to look at Russia fully.

Ignoring the comment, Russia put on his normal, cheerful smile and said, "Anyways, how are you today, Prussia? I didn't get to talk to you today, you weren't in gym."

"How do you think I am?" he asked, lacing his words with venom. "I'm hiding out in this room with a killer headache that Italy's not-as-cute brother gave me. Life sucks." He sighed melodramatically.

Russia giggled a little at the use of the word "cute" from the albino and then blinked a few times. "Romano? What did he do?"

"Don't laugh! That over jealous asshole head-butted me 'cause he thought I was flirting with Spain. I can't even talk to Spain anymore without dealing with whining or injuries... not that he wants me to talk to him anyway," Prussia said with a sigh, playing with the frays at the bottom of his shirt.

Russia tilted his head to the side a bit and gave his (mega-kawaii) smile. "Any sensible person would know that the only thing between you and Spain is friendship - though, with you guys, I'm not really sure if it can even be called that..." He sweat dropped a little and smiled doubtfully.

"You're right. It can't be called friendship anymore, can it? France, Spain, and I are more like acquaintances now." Shaking his head to snap out of his sad state, Prussia smirked and leaned back again. "They got too stupid to be considered friends of the awesome me!"

Russia giggled quietly, then blinked. "Oh, am I considered a friend?"

Looking at Russia confused, Prussia shrugged and questioned, "Are you going to ditch me once you get a girlfriend like Toni and Francis did? Or use being my 'friend' to trick me into a false sense of security then ambush me like Denmark did?"

Russia's eyebrows knitted together as he glanced to the side, looking hurt. "You would suspect me of doing that?"

Waving his hands up defensively, Gilbert quickly replied, "I know I didn't suspect them of doing what they did. Besides, you have a reputation of being secretly as scary as your sister, so you can't blame me for asking. It's not meant to be any offense to you specifically... Damn that face of yours!" He shook his head, exasperated.

Russia immediately cheered up. "Okay..." 'Wait, what was that about my face?' he thought, but shook the thoughts away. "I'd never betray anyone... They're usually the ones that betray me." Hurt flashed in his eyes for a moment, but his smile stayed still. 'Especially that once.'

"Shit, Birdie was right, huh?" he muttered to himself before nodding his head. "So are we... friends then?"

"Sure!" Russia said cheerfully, walking forward and sitting on the desk next to Prussia's. He had barely heard that first part, but he didn't question what he'd said, not wanting to be a bother.

"Interesting," Prussia said not knowing what else to say but attempting to keep the conversation going.

Russia "Hmmm"d and tilted his head back to look at the ceiling. "Hey, Prussia..." He frowned slightly and shook his head. "No, never mind."

Scowling, Prussia just shook his head. "Tch. Just so ya know, it really pisses me off when people do that. Totally not awesome."

Russia simply glanced at him and said, "When people don't want to finish their sentences, they won't..." He shrugged. "Not like it really even matters." He turned his head to look in the opposite direction of Prussia, for really no reason at all.

Crossing his arms angrily, Prussia also turned to look the other way. "It's still annoying. If something's annoying to me I should be allowed to say it is."

Russia smiled a little at the fact that the albino was getting aggravated. "I never said you weren't allowed. I just said that it's a personal preference."

"And it's my personal preference to tell you you're ticking me off when you are," Prussia said, trying very hard not to yell already at his new friend.

Russia smiled at Prussia. "You're not the only one getting pissed. I dislike stubborn people~..." Even though he was smiling cheerfully, one could feel the venom laced through his words. 'Okay, that's a lie. It's cute.'

"I'm not stubborn. I... Sorry. Whatever. Sorry for pissing you off. Still pissed off from this morning I guess," Prussia replied, rubbing his face, exhausted.

Russia smiled his normal smile and spoke with his usual tone. "Nyet, no biggie... Y'know... I could always just go kill him..." He grinned evilly, a dark aura around him.

Jaw dropping, Prussia flailed his arms while shaking his head. "No no. Don't kill him 'cause if you do then Feli will get upset and tell West and then he'll hate you and he'll give me grief about us being friends. Not to mention Toni would be super depressed !" Panting at talking so fast, Prussia went limp on the desk.

Russia laughed quietly, tilting his head back just a tad bit. "Ufufu~ I was just kidding, Prussia."

"I think I know why those rumors started," Prussia said, smirking up at the Russian. "You were scarier than your sister just now - and she walks around with a knife muttering half the time."

Russia just smiled and said, "Yes, maybe to you, but Belarus..." His smile disappeared and he tilted slightly to the side. "She..." He then had a purple aura around him as he covered his face and leaned on the table. "Ugh."

Poke. "Eh whats the matter Russia?" Poke. "What about Belarus?" Poke, poke, poke. "Tell me your deepest darkest secrets~ kesesesese!"

Russia looked at him, uncovering his face to show that he had tears in his eyes. "She's just so scary... She knocked down my door once while I was hiding from her... Constantly says, 'Become one' and all that..." He whimpered, and then hugged Prussia, trembling. "Strashno..."

Eyes widening, Prussia tried not to freak out at the sudden hug. "Umm... There there?" he said, patting Russia's back awkwardly. "Its okay... at least she isn't trying to kill you or your friends or something... by becoming one, do you mean...?"

"Actually, when I tried to become friends with the Vargas brothers, she scared them off." He sighed and hugged him tighter. "Yes, I mean exactly what you're thinking."

"Fucking lucky bastard," Prussia muttered, glaring down at the Russian's head. "So is Belarus the reason you don't have many friends?" he asked, rubbing Russia's back.

"Lucky? You're crazy." He frowned. "No, the reason I don't have many friends is because they all distance themselves from me. They all hate me. Everyone." He gripped Prussia even tighter and hunched his shoulders up, squinting his eyes and furrowing his eyebrows. "I'm sure even you hate me, even now..."

Wincing at the tight grip and death glare, Prussia sighed. "I don't hate you." 'Well not anymore' "I might be slightly weirded out, but I don't hate you. Hey, isn't Lithuania friends with you along with the other meek trio members?" he asked, trying to change the subject from him.

He muttered in Russian, "Chem bolʹshe ya lyublyu tebya , tem bolʹshe vy menya nenavidite." He shook the thought away. "Yes, he is..." Russia took a step back, smiled and said, "Well, they're more like my slaves."

Blinking Prussia sighed at the Russian's response "Isn't slavery illegal? So they can't be your slaves... Also, I don't speak Russian."

Russia blinked obliviously. "Really? Hmmm... I don't care." He smiled. "You weren't supposed to hear that."

Glaring at Russia, Prussia huffed angrily. "Well then..." Searching for the right thing to say, Prussia pulled out his phone. "I'll Google it then."

'... Now, what did he say?' Prussia thought to himself with a sweat drop.

"You can't if you don't know how it's written." Russia smiled innocently.

Growling, Prussia controlled the urge to throw his phone on the floor. "That's it. I decided I officially hate you," he said, pushing Russia away.

Russia frowned. "Eh? Just because I said something - to myself, mind you - in a language you don't know?" Russia sighed. 'Like I said...'

"Yes. Because it makes me feel stupid and that is not awesome," Prussia said, pointing at Russia. "And I am FUCKING awesome. So stop trying to make me feel like I'm not!" Jabbing his finger in Russia's chest, Prussia looked down at the other, "Admit that I'm awesome. Right. Now."

"Er..." Russia sweat dropped. "Why...?"

"Because I am awesome!" he exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. "No one...Er- That-Fuck," he groaned, catching himself just before he fell right on his ass and settled for sitting on the floor.

"Uhh..." Russia's sweat drop grew a little. "Um, okay. You're... awesome."

"Finally, someone sees!" he cheered, jumping up to hug Russia happily - in a very manly way, of course. "Now, if you could just tell West and Romano that!" he said, quickly letting Russia go and jumping up to peer out the window.

Russia raised his eyebrows and said, "I'm sure they're just in denial."

Here Prussia turned away from the window, wearing his famous shit-eating grin. "You are so right! Now, you get this kind of stuff!"

Russia laughed quietly, just a little huff, and covered his mouth, the tiniest of blushes on his cheeks. 'It's no wonder...'

"So from what I saw outside, Belarus was bugging Birdie about something, probably where you are," Prussia said trying to think of anything else to say, 'must avoid all awkward silences' being his main thought.

"... Birdie?" Then Russia blinked, with an "Oh!" of understanding, as he remembered the little chick that he'd seen fly around Prussia several times. "Are you saying the bird talks?"

"...Are you talking about Gilbird?" he questioned, tilting his head to the side confused.

"You mentioned him," Russia said with a sweat drop.

"Oh, wait, I think I got it. Anyway, Birdie is Canada, your hockey buddy right, and Gilbird is Gilbird. Two different people... animals... whatever," he said, sticking a finger on each hand up and waving them around.

"Oh..." Russia rubbed the back of his neck. "I've never met anyone that called him Birdie..."

Waving his hand back in forth in a bored manner, he commented as casually as possible, "Yeah, it's a kind of long story. Really boring. Whatever... Anyways, she's probably asking if you guys have practice today... Do you?"

"No; that's Tuesdays and Thursdays, and voluntarily on Saturdays at noon..." Russia sighed. "Thank бог..."

"If she finds that out she'll probably be at every practice, huh? Let's just hope Birdie doesn't blab... Then again, he's really cool about intuition and stuff, so he might know you wouldn't want her knowin'," Gilbert said, pacing as he spoke.

Russia nodded, looking slightly depressed - or maybe just tired, you could never really tell with him. "I don't even want to think about what would happen if he told."

A light bulb seemed to suddenly go off in Gilbert's head and his shit-eating grin returned. "If that becomes the case, maybe I could go to your practices and keep her distracted!" he said, wagging his eyebrows in a manner similar to France.

Russia glanced up at him. "She'd just smack you like Hungary and ignore you. And you know that."

Wincing, Prussia tried not to take the words to heart. "You got a point, I guess. Damn, why are all the pretty chicks so immune to my awesomeness?... Not like I need a girlfriend or anything," he muttered, sitting back down in his original spot next to Russia.

Russia smiled. "Do I not remind you of Natalia?" Then he frowned. He had sort of blurted it out, not even thinking about what would happen.

"Yeah, kind of. You guys are more alike than other siblings I know at least," he said, trying not to look too confused at the question. "In what way are you talking about?"

Russia flushed. "Er, please, don't pay attention to that question. I didn't mean to say it, slip of the tongue- however you say it in English."

"... You are so weird, you know that?" he questioned in a joking manner, smiling up at the other male.

Russia glanced at the albino, face flushed slightly, then said, "Da... I know."

"Hey, isn't there, like, a saying about weird or hated people making the best friends or something?... Or did Toni and I make that up?" he said looking, up at the ceiling as he searched his memory.

Russia shrugged. "I don't speak English very well, I'm afraid... I know very few popular sayings."

"Really? Maybe I should teach you. The awesome me is an awesome teacher!" he said, smirking at all the things he's taught people over the years.

Russia smiled. "That'd be... awesome." He looked down at the self-proclaimed awesome man beside him. 'Da... I was right.'

"Damn right, it would," he said, smirking up at the taller man. "You... You're tall... Very tall."

"Da..." Russia pouted. "I'm big-boned, it's not my fault..."

"Dammit, that means you're the more... fuck, what word was it that Japan used? Anyways, it means you're more awesome than me 'cause the shorter guys has to be the... whatever the word is... dammit, Hungary uses those terms all the time and this sentence doesn't make sense without them!" he huffed, pulling his legs up to sit Indian style.

Russia quirked an eyebrow, tilting his head to the side. "Hm?"

"I can't explain it. But like taller guys are the ones who are always cooler and macho and shorter guys end up being the not-so-awesome little boys ordered around by their taller friends... or something. It has to do with manga knowing those two," he said, grabbing his chin with his fingers and stroking his invisible goatee of awesomeness.

"Er..." Russia had a thought, and knowing Hungary, it probably was correct. "Well, just a thought, but... could you possibly mean 'Seme'?"

"Yeah, that sounds right!" Prussia said, nodding his head. "...Still don't know what it means but that's it. So, since you're taller it makes you the Seme and thus more awesome than me, which sucks." He pouted.

Russia snickered, covering his mouth. He knew exactly what it meant, but he wasn't complaining with the idea, of course. "I figured you didn't understand it." Embarrassing thoughts flashed through his head, and his cheeks turned red. "Well... I'll explain, but I'm not sure if I can explain it in English. I may have to show you how to do Google Translate from Russian."

"I know how to Google Translate, thank you very much! But, yes, tell me. Those two always talk about that junk... It's kind of weird... Do I really want to know?" he asked, suddenly fearful of knowing exactly what Hungary and Japan are always saying, knowing he couldn't understand them.

"Well... you probably don't. I'm telling you anyways." He shrugged. "You can't type it in Russian, can you? I'll use my phone, it has Russian characters." He pulled out a simple flip-phone from a pocket in his long coat, and went to Google Translate.

"Wait, if I don't want to know, then why would you still tell me? Very uncool of you." Watching as the man typed, Prussia had to ask, "So, do you text people in Russian too?"

Russia smiled. "No, I usually use Google Translate." He typed in: "В гей-пара, "сема" это та, которая, как правило, выше, и "сверху", если хотите." He hit Translate, and up popped "In a gay couple, a 'seme' is the one that is usually taller and is "on top", if you will."

Staring at the phone wide eyed, Gilbert tried to close his mouth that was hanging open in shock. "What -I-That... BITCH I WOULD TOTALLY NOT BOTTOM!" he screeched angrily, flailing his arms. "NOT COOL!"

"Are you saying I should bottom?" Russia frowned. "No way."

At this Prussia just turned to stare at the Russian, asking slightly angrily, "Wait, what?"

Russia looked about way too innocently. "Noooothing..."

His voice picking up a defensive tone, he stated, "Don't play innocent with me. That's MY act. Now, who said anything about us being together?"

"Certainly not me~," sang the Russian with a smile.

"Yes, you did. You asked if you should bottom! That implies we-" he said gesturing between them both "-are fucking. WE ARE NOT FUCKING, IVAN!" he screeched angrily, his face turning red.

Russia smiled. "It was only a question. And why is your face so red? Are you... embarrassed?"

Prussia wanted to smack that smile off his face, so badly, but instead he settled for seething out, "My face turns red when I'm angry. I. Am VERY. Fucking. Angry."

"Hmmmm..." Ivan smirked. "I don't see why." He was containing his laughter, which was so difficult he was in pain.

"Sh-shut up. Fuckin' commie!" he muttered, walking to the other side of the room.

Russia simply stared at him, smiling still. "Hmmm..." He muttered under his breath so Prussia couldn't hear, "YA vse yeshche lyublyu tebya, Prussiya... Imenno tak Vy znaete."

Sighing, Prussia started to walk to the door. "I'll see you later Russia... or not."

And then...

"You know what? No." Turning to Russia, Prussia pointed at the door. "My room. YOU leave."

Ivan blinked several times, looking confused. "Eh? Why?"

Stalking over to the Russian, Prussia glared at him. "Why not?"

"... I don't want to, though." Ivan pouted childishly.

"Don't pout like that," he said, grabbing the scarf to pull the others face down to eye level. "I'm pissed at you. Now move."

Ivan frowned. "No."

"Give me a good reason why I shouldn't kick your ass!" he asked, tightening his grip on the scarf.

Ivan smirked. "I have several I could say, right now..."

"Fucking asshole!" he said pushing Ivan away from him.

Ivan blinked. "Oh- no, wait, I got it!"

"Oh really what is it?" he asked, placing his fist on his hips. "Please do tell. I'm DYING in anticipation."

"You may want to mentally prepare yourself." Ivan smirked and swiftly leaned in, pressing his lips to the shorter male's.

Standing there, Prussia had no fucking idea what he wanted to do. Prove he could dominate the Russian or push him away? Continue glaring at him and not responding or trick Russia so he could bite his tongue off? He was NOT given enough time to prepare himself, and so he stood there staring blankly up at Russia and his big stupid face.

Russia smirked when Prussia didn't respond, and pushed him back to the desk behind, placing his hands on either side of the albino's hips.

Finally deciding what to do, Prussia pushed Russia's shoulders far enough away so their lips were no longer connected, but made no attempts to otherwise change their position. "Did I give you permission to kiss me?" he asked, trying, and failing miserably, to keep his voice angry.

Ivan frowned. "I needed permission?" He leaned in slightly and put his forehead on Prussia's. "If that's the case; did I give you permission to stop me from kissing you?" He smirked.

"It's my body. I can stop you from doing things like that to me if I want."

Ivan grinned, suddenly snapping. "Not when I'm in charge."

"And who said you would be in charge? I could be in charge too. Watch," he said, pulling Russia's neck down so he was kissing the taller male.

Ivan smirked, as he had practically just won. However, he wasn't about to allow Gilbert to take over. Instead, he bit his bottom lip to open his mouth and slid his tongue in immediately, not even bothering to fight for dominance.

Prussia groaned as his mouth was assaulted by Russia's tongue [if anyone asked it was a groan of anger at Russia's new cockiness] trying to somehow find a piece of control in this situation - and failing.

Russia deepened the kiss, pressing himself more against the albino and slipping one of his legs in between Gilbert's. He Hn'd as he heard - and felt - the groan, as his tongue explored Prussia's mouth.

Prussia idly kissing Russia ground his vital regions against whatever part of Russia was there moaning as he did so.

Finding this pleasing, Russia continued to kiss Prussia, as - believe it or not - this was his first and he simply wanted to ride it out as long as he could. Prussia realized he was lacking air but refused to be the first to break and so kissed Ivan deeper trying to take in as much air as possible from his nose.

Russia nearly frowned when he noticed that Prussia wasn't going to give up. He was low on air, and so he pulled back with a groan, frowning. "Budʹ ty proklyat," he muttered to himself, his violet eyes staring into crimson ones, as he touched his forehead to the albino's.

Blinking, Prussia some how worked out "What does that mean?" through his pants.

Russia smiled gently. "Damn you." Then he laughed quietly.

"Back at ya, Sweetheart," he muttered, smirking up at the laughing man.

"Hmmm..." Russia pressed his lips to Prussia's once more, but it was gentle, nowhere near as rough and frantic as the last.

Matching the other as best he could, Prussia wondered why this kiss was affecting him more than the other, causing his heart to skip a beat and his face to flush. Russia broke the kiss after about a minute, with a thoughtful look on his face. "..."

Prussia looked up at Russia watching the others face. "So... I make a friend and then we make out a little while later. Totally normal, right?" he asked, mustering up his infamous shit-eating grin again.

Russia chuckled. "If that's how you see it." He loved seeing that grin of his, no matter how weak and -most likely- fake.

"Nope. Not at all. It's not normal at all," he said, shaking his head happily. "Then again, I don't think either of us are normal."

"Normal? What is this 'normal' you speak of?" joked the Russian.

"Exactly," Prussia said happily. ... "I'm gonna die aren't I?"

Russia blinked. "Eh? Why would you be dying?"

"Hm, let's see, I lied to Belarus and then made out with you. She's gonna skin me alive and drop me in a vat of lemon juice," he said, burying his face into the crook of Ivan's neck. "Once again, life sucks for the awesome me."

"No..." Russia laughed a little. "No matter how much she dislikes the idea, she'll listen to me..." With a smile, he said cheerfully, "After all, I am her 'Dear Brother'."

"So then it's just my family to deal with, eh?... I'm dead," he muttered, lightly kissing at the throat in front of him.

Realizing he was still leaning on the albino, Ivan suddenly grabbed Prussia's arm and sat down in the chair of the desk they were against, having Prussia sit on top of him, but facing him and with a leg on either side. Russia just smiled cheerfully. "Not if they don't find out."

Clearing his throat awkwardly and ignoring the fact that his face matched his eyes, Prussia looked at Russia. "So does this mean we're, like, dating... or something?"

"If that's what you want it to mean." Russia smiled and kissed his cheek.

Glaring into violet eyes, Prussia asked [demanded], "What do YOU want, Ivan? After all, you were the one in charge earlier."

Russia continued to smile as he said, "Belarus wouldn't be happy about what I want, that's for sure." He quirked an eyebrow. "But isn't that dependent on both sides?"

"I hate you. Ya know that?" he asked, kissing Russia while standing up. "So I think the awesome me will make my leave now. You made my headache worse and West should be finding out soon that I'm missing." He messed with his hair as he stood over his new boyfriend.

"Hmm. Okay." Russia stood as well. "Belarus is probably going through my stuff for clues as to where I am." He leaned down and kissed Prussia gently. "I'll see you. YA lyublyu tebya~!" he called as he swiftly exited the room.

"Now what the fuck was that?" Prussia asked himself, walking out of the room to find someone with food.

Unfortunately, Belarus was still there, and saw Russia, and the chase continued. "Uhodi, uhodi, uhodi!"

"Šliub šliubam šliub šliub šliubam Šliub šliubam šliub šliub šliubam Šliub šliubam šliub šliub šliubam Šliub šliubam šliub šliub šliubam Šliub šliubam šliub šliub šliubam!" yelled Belarus as she followed her elder brother around.


Thank you for reading -bows deeply- Please if it's not to much trouble, review? Anonreviews are enabled according to my account! Signed reviews are good too though cause then I find new people whose stories I can read ^^