Alex Returns
Piper Chapman had never felt this exhilarated in her entire life and all she was really doing was staring out the window, watching a van pull up to the prison. Through the caged bars that prevented her from a better view, she watched a tall woman with long dark hair and secretary glasses emerge from the federal van. Piper felt like her heart was being pitted for seeds. She raised her hand to the glass, feeling the cold. The dark haired woman was still in her pajamas; a green t-shirt with its sleeves folded up and a pair of blue cotton pants.
They didn't even let her bring a jacket, Piper thought, her forehead falling against the glass.
"Chapman!" a correctional officer yelled. It was Bell. Bell always knew how to make Piper jump. "That's federal property. Knock it off," the woman snapped before seeing the van down outside. "Ah. You're little girlfriend's back," she smirked. Bell's walkie-talkie chirped before Piper could summon up a good comeback. It was a good thing she didn't; inmates were still being written up every day for minor infractions. Bell glanced back at Piper, "Don't kiss the windows, Chapman," she said, continuing up the stairs.
Piper watched as dark haired woman was led into the facility by two guards before disappearing under the roof's overhang.
"Hi, Alex," Piper whispered, before leaving the window in the stairwell.
Piper hadn't seen Alex until her assigned laundry day. The bitch has been giving me the slip, she thought, angrily walking down to the laundry rooms. When Piper rounded the corner, she halted at the sight of the bitch, and her boots squeaked against the floor. Any malicious thought or feeling Piper had vanished and the guilt bubbled up like shit in a shower stall.
The dark haired woman looked up. Her jaw clenched, but she coolly looked away, tossing more inmate clothes into the washing machines. Piper felt eyes on her as she tentatively approached the woman. She sighed.
"Look, I'm sorry, Alex, but at least you're back here," she said. "You're safe here. If Kubra had gotten to you before—"
"You know what? Cut the crap, Pipes."
"Cut the crap pipes?" Piper baited, smiling. The corner of Alex's mouth twitched, as if she wanted to laugh, but the resentment had already won her over. Alex shook her head, tears swelled up in her eyes, and she made Piper wait a full minute before being able to look at her.
"So," she said, her voice cracking, "So, I got you thrown in prison, I got you to lie on record—plans changed—I didn't and so I got out, and…" Alex said, shaking her head and tears streaked under her glasses and down her face. "And you get me caught violating parole. So, I guess we're even now."
"I guess," Piper said, weakly. She didn't think it was very even, after all the shit Alex put her through, but Piper was never like Alex. She couldn't stand to see Alex break in front of her. Alex was the rock, Piper wasn't.
"Just stay the fuck away from me, Chapman. Because if we keep this shit up at this rate, we'll get into the Guinness Book of World Records for the two Biggest Dumbasses award."
"Well, actually," Piper wavered. "I don't think the Guinness Book of World Records would award two people if it's for the Biggest or the Largest—they would always give the certificate to the larger of the…" Piper said, before seeing Alex's scowl. "Two," she awkwardly finished.
"Great," Alex frowned. "Well, it's all yours. Congratulations. Forgive me if I don't attend the award ceremony. I've decided I've had enough of the Piper Chapman Show for a lifetime. And—don't worry, I know the Piper Chapman Show is like the Oprah Winfrey Show or the Ellen DeGeneres Show—and that it doesn't actually last a lifetime—"
"I don't really know what you're saying—you're not making any sense—"
"I'm tired of you, Piper," Alex said, curtly. "I'm tired and I'm bored and I don't want to watch you anymore. I just want to turn of my T.V., drink some wine, and be left the fuck alone."
"Okay," Piper said, dropping her gaze and became acutely aware that everyone had been staring at them. She gently placed her laundry bag in the bin with the others before leaving. On her hurried escape, Piper thought, Goodbye Alex.
