Disclaimer: I do not own KND, I wrote this and its chapters months ago, and I just found it on my laptop. I hope you enjoy...
Title: Nigel and Rachel's Wedding
Summary: How to ruin Nigel Uno's Wedding in ten easy steps!
STEP ONE: FORM A RIVALRY
The wedding was a few weeks away. Everything from the dress all the way down to the style of napkins had been planned, except for one tiny detail. It was the detail that Nigel had been avoiding throughout his entire engagement with Rachel.
At least Rachel had it easy. He had no idea how she did it and it turned out perfectly. He, however, knew his decision was going to end in disaster. He had put it off, until last night when they were going over the list again.
Now he couldn't put it off. He took in a deep breath when he heard the doorbell rang.
"What's up, Nigel?" Hoagie asked, as he and Wally entered into Nigel's apartment.
"Nothing much" He said, scratching his neck. "You know, wedding plans and all that" He didn't know why he was nervous. He had reviewed over and over how he was going to explain this in his mind.
Wally shrugged his shoulders. "I don't see why you and Rachel want some big shindig. Mine and Kooks wasn't even half as big as yours."
"You eloped in Vegas" Hoagie reminded him. He then turned back to face Nigel. "So what is it you called us over for?"
"Are we planning your super cool bachelor party?" Wally asked. "Cause I got some really cool ideas."
Nigel started to fidget with his fingers. "Actually what I'd like to erm, discuss with you is this. With the wedding being only a few weeks away, I've realized that I need to choose a Best Man. This is a choice I cannot choose lightly. As you know, of all the groomsmen, heck, out of all of the wedding party, the Best man has a lot to do.
"Giving the first toast, planning the bachelor party, guarding the rings, pick up the tuxedos, help make sure everything is order etc." Nigel said.
The two stared blankly at him. "So, you picked me right?" Wally asked.
Hoagie scoffed. "He obviously picked me!"
"Why would he pick you over me?"
"Because I'm his Best friend"
"Don't you mean Big friend?"
"I'll have you know that I lost ten pounds with Weight Watchers last week. Besides, The job of Best man is very important to the wedding. You'd just screw it up."
"Not as much as you would!"
Nigel's head began to throb. "Enough, already!" He exclaimed. He waited a minute, calming himself down. "I haven't picked a best man yet."
Hoagie and Wally exchanged glances. "But you're gonna pick me, right?" Hoagie asked.
"No, way, he's picking me" Wally exclaimed.
The two continued on with their heated argument, while Nigel headed over to the cabinet to get some aspirin.
STEP TWO: LOSE AN IMPORTANT ITEM
If looks could kill, the plumber would've been convicted of two murders. Wally and Hoagie grinned sheepishly, as they stood in the mess of toilet, sink, and bathtub water.
What had happened was this…
Nigel had called them both earlier to get his organizer from his apartment. Wally and Hoagie headed up, using the spare key they were given back when they were all roommates. They stepped inside the nice, clean apartment, looking around for the organizer.
Hoagie looked down at the floor. "Wally, your shoes untied" He told him.
"So what?" Wally asked, looking down at his sneakers.
"You have a habit to trip over them" Hoagie said, as he headed over to the office area.
"I do not" He said.
Hoagie shrugged his shoulders, looking around at Nigel's desk. Surely the organizer had to be here somewhere.
"Wow, cool!" Wally's voice came from the other side of the apartment. "Look what I found?"
"The organizer?" Hoagie asked, heading over towards the living area.
"The rings!" Wally exclaimed, holding out his hands to show the rings that were to be used in Nigel's wedding.
"Put those back and help me find the organizer" Hoagie told him.
Wally mumbled something under his breath, and he took a step forward towards the hall. He tripped over his untied laces, and the rings went into the air. They flew across the hall, and right into the sink in the bathroom.
"It's ok" Hoagie said, trying not to panic. "I'm good with tools, I'll get the rings out in no time"
….. Kuki headed up stairs, entering as the plumber was heading out. " Nigel sent me over to see what was taking you so long-Whoa! What happened to you guys?" She asked, seeing the two boys drenched from head to toe, and covered in sludge.
"Ask your prince charming, here. He almost lost the rings" Hoagie said, trudging his way out of the apartment.
STEP THREE: OFFEND SMALL CHILDREN
The flower girl has a black belt in karate and hates to be called cute. Enough said.
STAY TUNED FOR STEPS FOUR THROUGH SIX!
