As the last of the staff started their assent to get some sleep after the joyous evening of celebrations over the Bates' proven freedom, Elsie slipped back to her sitting room, needing a moment, to process, and maybe even revel in what the evening had brought to light for her…for them.
She sunk into the chair at her desk absently rubbing the back of the finger that would one day soon have a ring encircling it.
He loves me
He loves me
He loves me?
He does love me.
It had all been there in that moment his eyes met hers, and when his lips met hers. It hadn't been a dream. In that moment all of the things they hadn't been able to say to each other, the things they had used Mrs. Patmore to pass between them, were answered. His love for her, her love and long unacknowledged passion for him.
What she saw in his eyes; so much want and desire as he stepped towards her and it would have frightened her had it not been matched by the churning of butterflies mingled with a new fire in the pit of her stomach.
Not really a new fire if she was honest.
There had been looks and comments between them for years. Little moments that as much as she might have wished, she never quite let herself trust or believe in their depths. Even in his proposal, a mist of tears having filled his eyes, she still had doubted how far Charles Carson's feelings could reach. Weeks of doubt that had toyed and tangled into her thoughts only to be vanquished with that look in his eyes. She truly did feel foolish now. She should have known Charles Carson did nothing by halves, and certainly he didn't intend to start with their marriage.
After they had kissed, his arms had pulled her in and she had instinctively wrapped her arms around him. No second guessing, no worrying about propriety or the revolving door of interruptions that always seemed to be flowing through and halting their conversations.
They had held each other and as time had begun to resume, the music from the gramophone in the servant's hall had reached their ears and he had pulled back from her a bit. She had been sure he would have ended the moment, but he had simply lifted her hands and begun to dance. Slowly, gently, he danced with her. She had brought her eyes up to meet his and still found all of the love written there.
She knew she must have been blushing but maybe the dim lighting of the pantry had hidden her naivety. At the time she really didn't care now and he didn't seem to mind. He had finished the dance by kissing her hand lightly, gently, reverently as the song ended, nodding towards the door to suggest that they should probably rejoin their charges (their friends, their family really). The rest of it was a blur; laughter and dancing and flowing champagne and a long laid weight being lifted from them all.
And here she sits.
"You really need to go on up yourself." She silently chided herself.
A light tap on her door brought her out of her musings. It was him. She knew it as well as she knew the lines in the palm of her own hand.
"Elsie?"
He finally said it.
"Charlie?"
That look on his face; she bit down on her lip to hold in the giggle that threatened to escape as he crossed to her, taking her hand and pulling her to her feet.
"Elsie Hughes, I have given in to your request."
"Oh yes?"
"I have called you by your Christian name, and now that the other matter has been settled…"
"Yes, Charlie?" she bit her lip again as her breathing seemed to stop. Where is he going with this?
"Well I think I would like to, if you are truly ready, to see about setting that date. For our wedding."
Releasing her breath and a giggle that had been dancing in her throat, Elsie thought that for just a moment he looked as if he might be offended, so she stepped into his arms.
"Charlie, I think it's time we turn in for the night."
"Oh?"
She slipped past him, turning the lights down before turning to him and reaching out her hand.
"And if you will meet me here before breakfast in the morning, we'll see about choosing that date."
His face beamed with the light that she ignited in him as his hand wrapped around hers and he let her lead him as she had that day at the sea, up the stairs to where they parted ways to the men's and ladies quarters.
In the darkened stair well he kissed her again. Just a soft peck on her temple.
"Good night, Elsie."
"Good night, my Charlie"
