Saturday, December 24, 2016

9:34 p.m.

I need to tell someone about what just happened, but all of the Brooklyn House initiates – including Carter – are out right now, battling some out-of-control magic penguins down in the 360th Nome, and Carter dropped the recorder onto solid concrete last week. I've decided to start a journal to keep track of all those things I can't trust to Khufu or Philip of Macedonia.

Oh, sorry – Sadie Kane here. You may recognise me from the recordings my brother Carter and I sent to the author bloke in Texas. I honestly don't know why I'm giving my name to a book, but I suppose if someone wants to publish this, they'd better know who wrote it.

Anyway – what just happened.

I was watching the newest Star Wars (Anubis's obsession had rubbed off on Walt, which in turn rubbed off on me) and wrapping gifts for the initiates when a musical tone alerted me to a video call on the T.V. Yes, our T.V. does video calls. Pretty amazing, isn't it? I was expecting a report from Carter, or maybe another prank call from Felix, who was enjoying his new phone. Instead, a face I knew well appeared.

"Oh, my god!" I yelled. "Daisy Ridley?"

Daisy responded hesitantly, a note of confusion in her voice. "Um, I don't know a Daisy Ridley. Are you – I don't suppose you're on D'Qar?"

"Very funny, but April Fools' was nine months ago. What – why –"

"I think I may have put in the wrong address. You needn't worry. Proceed with... whatever you're doing," she said. She still sounded quite baffled. I often do that to adults, but I'd hardly said anything. She was the famous actress calling me. I should have been the one baffled.

"I'm wrapping Christmas gifts. You know? Because it's Christmas Eve?" I explained.

She blinked. "I – I've never heard of Christmas. I'll just end the call now."

This was clearly an outrage. "You've never heard of Christmas?! What kind of human being are you?! If you're pretending to be Rey, it's gone too far!" I shouted. Khufu, who was sitting on the couch wrapping a basketball for Carter, grunted.

"Khufu, you're not one to talk. You're wrapping Carter's present right now," I told him. I barely understood him, but a roll of his eyes conveyed that I was right.

Daisy ignored Khufu and looked at me as though I were a line on a script she couldn't quite understand. "I'm not pretending to be Rey. I am Rey. Who are you?"

I'll admit, my mouth hung open. Khufu spoke for the both of us. I'm pretty sure he said, "Impossible."

"Who are you? And what is your... whatever it is trying to say?" Rey repeated.

"I'm Sadie Kane," I managed. "That's Khufu. He's a baboon. He's saying that it's impossible that you're Rey because Rey is a fictional character. She's Luke Skywalker's daughter. There's a whole movie about her, and there'll soon be more."

Now her mouth hung open. We sat like that for a full thirty seconds, staring at each other.

Finally, she said, "I'm Luke's daughter?"

"Well, that's just my personal opinion. Walt, my boyfriend, thinks Rey is Han Solo's daughter, though I find that ridiculous because wouldn't he have recognised her? It's rather obvious. The end of the movie, where Luke just stood there staring at her? Total giveaway. And she's so strong with the Force –"

"Hang on," she interrupted. "You talk far too much for a little girl."

"From what I remember, you're hardly any better," I muttered.

She looked offended. "Excuse me? I –"

"Hey, Rey!" A man's voice from a little ways off interrupted her. "You done yet? I could really use some help down here!"

"Oh, my god, is that Finn? Where are you? Are you on the Millennium Falcon?" I asked excitedly. By now, I was on my feet, practically bouncing up and down with excitement.

"Yes, that's Finn, and we're on the Falcon. How do you know those names?" she asked. I started to respond, but she interrupted. "No, wait, I don't want to know." Then an alarm started beeping. "Oh, bantha dung. I'm sorry, I've really got to go now." I heard a small beep and the T.V. went black.

I suppose I should go back to wrapping gifts, but it's rather hard to do something so mundane when you've just had a call from your favourite actress, or possibly your favourite movie character. I think I'll continue writing in this.

I wonder what the initiates are getting me for Christmas. Carter, no doubt, is getting me that new black wand that just came out. Felix will probably bring me a magic penguin chick. Also – Walt says Anubis has never heard of the Egyptian god of ice, so Carter and I decided to risk telling him about out run-in with the Jacksons – oh, sorry, Percy Jackson and Annabeth Chase. It's quite hard not to ship them. Anyway, we leaked that to Felix. He's currently following the path of Khione, the Greek goddess of ice, with a bit of help from one of Percy's friends. He's apparently had some bad experiences with her but still has her on speed dial for some reason. His girlfriend wasn't too happy when she found out about that. But that's a different story.

Walt's been quite secretive lately about anything concerning gifts, so I'm guessing he's gotten me something quite large. Perhaps a girlfriend for Freak who doesn't choke on anything she eats or spook at a car driving by. I'd quite like that. I –

Sorry about that. I thought I heard a crash outside and went to go see what it was. Turns out nothing's happened. As I was saying –

God, something does not want me to write that. I suppose I'd better go check it out.

Oh, my god, never mind. Either some Egyptian nasty is quite angry at me, or the Millennium Falcon just landed on the terrace! I should probably have a look, but I'm too busy writing all of this down. Rey just walked out! Oh, god, she just spotted me. She's coming over. She's reaching out her hand like she wants to take this journal. I've got to go now! Talk to -

(If you didn't get that, Rey grabbed Sadie's journal.)