Hello everyone and welcome to Therapeutic Love. A side project focusing on a pair that isn't heavily focused on. While it will be set a good few years in the future, I'll be keeping most of the stuff that comes up based on the anime, not the manga. So if some stuff seems off or wrong for whatever reason, that will be why. I'm not one hundred percent up to date and can't stay up to date so it's easiest to do it this way. So if things are off-canon know that I'll be altering based on the information and characters of the third season forward. The focus will be on Toga and Deku's relationship as a priority for all those non-villain Deku x Toga fans, whoever you may be.


"He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me. He loves me. He loves me…" The blonde-haired woman mumbled this to herself as she meticulously picked apart the flower she had gotten from the ground a few steps back. What started as an innocent little pastime by lovestruck young minds quickly divulged into a psychotic rambling of reassurance certain to freak out anyone who heard it. That is, if anyone was around to hear it. At this time of night, only two people would be out. The psychotic blonde torturing the plant life and- "Oh come on out Deku~ You know I know you're here. Don't want me to fade away into the night, do yooooou?"

The young hero took a deep breath before leaping down from his perch. With the aid of support items, he was able to observe and hear from quite a distance, as he had yet to fully develop One For All to the point of heightening those senses to such abnormal levels. He, however, wanted to be able to know when anyone around was in danger, so no one's cries would go unheard. It also allowed for these meet-ups. "You know our deal, Toga." He stated fist clenched as he stared into the eyes of the girl. His fist wasn't preparing an attack, it was merely a way for him to relieve frustration caused by the situation.

"Yeah yeah. Just 'cause I'm blonde doesn't mean I'm a dummy! Meet up, tell you what I've been up to, same old shtick. Until I finally snap!" Her jovial tone almost outweighed the seriousness of the situation. Almost. She was, at least at one point, a rather active killer. Yet here she was, staring down a rising star of a hero with no fear. This was, of course, due to the agreement the young hero made when he was even younger that he couldn't let himself break for one reason or another. He often thought up several, but it typically led to the same point. She could still be saved with his help, and he did not want a life wasted.

"Please, don't talk like that. You've been doing so well." Izuku Midoriya, not Deku the Hero, approached the woman with his palms out and a sad lilt in his voice. He had discovered quite some time ago that Himiko Toga was a troubled girl. One that most of the world would indeed see locked up. Or worse, put down. But he was not like the Explosion Hero. He did not seek to end the lives of villains. He wanted to protect people. To save them. To help. He saw Toga as a girl in need of some help.

"Mmm. But it's sooooo dull. Can't I just murder some villains? Pweeease?" The agreement they had in place was a simple one. First, no more killing. It took a lot of convincing to get her to agree to that rule and she certainly tried to wiggle out of it every chance she got. Offering wild situations in which she could hypothetically do it. None were ever approved. The second rule was she keeps a journal. Nothing heavy. At least one entry a day, no upper limit, that they'd go over when they met up each week. She was unsure of it at first. The first week she was given a stern talking to for all the doodles of her killing people as 'not real journaling' but she had been getting steadily better.

Then there was the matter of 'paying her dues.' Since she had committed enough crimes already to warrant a death penalty in other countries and be considered a hostile enough threat to not have a take in alive order, she would need to try and pay her debt to society. She did this by volunteering and living a life as if she were to do a prison sentence. She had a curfew on days she didn't have meetings, no meeting with active or suspected villains, and she couldn't participate in risky behaviors. She found it dreadfully dull, but she got to do artwork, red not allowed since she had a pension for painting bloody bodies, as an outlet and form of entertainment. In truth she had gotten the greatest deal she could have hoped for. Villains were villains in the eye of the law in Japan and would never have been allowed the luxuries she was afforded like an apartment, neighbors, a tv, painting supplies, and a certain degree of freedom. Things she'd never get if they were following the law.

The law. Deku didn't serve the law. That was for the police force and the lawyers. He served justice. Toga was, by all standards, mentally ill. She could be quite nice under the right circumstances. Sometimes even sweet. But whatever was wrong with her could flare up and… Well, the people who could finish describing that were either dead or in that park. Deku realized that but knew Toga was not entirely to blame. She was unstable, certainly, but the answer to that was not to imprison her for the rest of her life. "No. Now come on, let me see what you've been feeling this week."

When he outstretched his hand Toga nearly fainted. It was always fairytale like to her, the way he did it. Though she always pictured cutting off prince charming's hand in those fairytales…But not her sweet Midoriya. He needed to keep it for his hero-ing. She just pictured cutting it a bit.. Just a bit. So, he knew she loved him so. She walked to the bench and opened her studded pink journal and flipped to the beginning of that week. "You know, if we lived together we could do this daily instead of weekly." She proposed the option for the roughly one bajillionth time to her memory, one hundred and eighth to Midorya's memory.

"Please take this seriously. Let me hear about your week." Izuku was no therapist, but he had certainly talked with some, at various points throughout his life in fact. But he was a quick learner and avid scrounger of information. He gathered what techniques he could and was trying his best to help her in this capacity. All the while trying to find support for this type of aid in traditional forms. Until a place opened he was sure wouldn't immediately turn her over to the nearest super-max prison for life in solitary, he would handle it. Knowing full well what her slipping up could mean for him.

"Anything for you, Izuku~," She said with a poke to his cheek as she flipped to the entry at the beginning of the week.

"Dear Deku" It began as most of the journals did, direct letters to him. Since her mind was so filled with Deku after meeting with him at the end of each week and she knew they'd go through it at the next she wrote them out this way. "You are a big meany." And that was typically the follow up to him rejecting her. "But it's okay. I still love you." Standard stuff. "Love love love love…" It continued like that for another page, but it didn't phase the hero. Her unhealthy infatuation was one of the things keeping people safe. She didn't want to upset him, and he got pretty upset at murder. He really wished it wasn't this way. That the sole thing anchoring her wasn't an unhealthy love for him, but that's how things were. He certainly got used to crazed fan girls, he was a famous hero now, but they weren't as close as Toga. If he could actually help her he may even… No, he couldn't think like that.

Day Two. "Dear Deku. I did like you told me and used my breathing technique to calm down after someone cut themselves while chopping up some onions. They were so bloody and they screamed a bit… Buttttt I did what you said and asked to be excused. Then held my breath and shut out the world. 'I do NOT like it' Her little side not was in a big bold font and underlined countless times. Deku could gleam why easily enough. Toga didn't like silence, emptiness, being alone. He had learned over their time that her desire to be others was over fear of being herself. Something an entry-level to psychology course could have told him, but it was about what he was working with. What he hadn't been prepared for was the why.

Day Three. "Dear Deku. The crying guy came back again. The one who I told you saw things? He was all alone and this time I didn't even think about stabbing him until after I already left! Soooooooooooo you better have brought a cookie for me!"

Deku sighed as he reached into his pouch and looked at her all giggly and smiling, proud of herself for not killing a deranged homeless man. It wouldn't be a true plan if he didn't reward her as well when she had her own little victories. She had gotten to a point where she didn't lie to him. She had slipped up quite often early on, even nearly killed a man once, and he hadn't broken their deal. So long as she didn't break the iron-clad rule to not follow through and kill someone, she'd still get to see him. So, she took her reward cookie and nommed it as playfully as she could, hoping to look extra cute for her Deku.

Day Four. "Dear Deku. Sorry I was so greedy about the cookie. I mean, I'm sorry now. I bet it's suuuuper good then though in which case totally not sorry. Anyway, I tried to paint the river but there wasn't a color to do the sun so… Don't get mad, I made it especially for you!"

Toga had finished the cookie before Deku could read that and give her a stare. She frowned in an over-exaggerated manor and handed over a folded sheet. On it was the river view from her apartment window painted and a bit smooshed from the folding to bring it. The damage aside it was practiced, but not trained, work and would not look too out of place as a bit of wall décor in an average home…if it weren't for the red sun sinking seemingly into the river. It was a different tone and texture than everything else. Something Midoriya immediately recognized.

"Before you get too upset, I didn't hurt anybody. Just me!" With that she held up her hand, several fingers were bandaged. Toga's eyes and smile showed that she thought what she did was the right thing to do, at least as right as it could be. She had wanted so bad to paint something for her Deku that would make him want her more. So a beautiful painting of the view he could see from her place was a good idea to start. But the view was best when the sun was setting and it made the sky red. Since he bought most all of her non-essentials and red paint was a no-no…

Deku's frown sunk lower as he shook his head. This was his fault, he convinced himself. He should've updated that old rule. The rule against the color red was passed after she had repeatedly painted bloody scenes involving various people covered in blood. The last straw was a bloody portrait of Deku himself that she particularly enjoyed. One he destroyed. "I don't want you hurting yourself, Toga." He took her hands and unwrapped the bandages carefully to check her wounds. As he thought she had done nothing to protect against infection. Luckily it was only in one of the fingers. He reached in his pack and used a specialty spray. "I'll get you some antibiotics that you can start taking soon. You'll need to take them exactly as I tell you and not throw any away. But I'm disappointed. You should've talked to me. We could've changed that rule."

"Ugh! You and your rules! I've seen you do waaayyy worse to people on the news!" Toga said, pointing a re-bandaged finger at him in an accusatory way. Whenever the up and coming hero Deku arrived on the scene, people would talk about how the Earth shook and the skies cleared as if being enacted upon by a force of nature. In truth, it was just the reaction of his power on the world around him. If he didn't regulate himself, he could cause an earthquake or kick up tornados, and that was just his physical strength.

"Only people who are threatening others, and only when there's no other option. You know that. I don't want anyone getting hurt, Toga. That includes you." Deku closed the distance and put his hands on her shoulders. A move that at one time would've been tantamount to a suicide attempt. Even now it was something only the foolhardy would do... unless they were Deku.

Toga found herself lost in his big green doe-like eyes. She liked to joke about how green he was, but it was mesmerizing. Like a trip deep into the forest. She could hear the part of her whispering that green wasn't his color. It was red. That the light scent of sweat from his day of hero work didn't suit him. He should reek of blood. But as much as she wanted to BE him, it would mean not getting to be WITH him anymore. Now that the voice was a whisper and not a shriek, she could appreciate the weaker With more than the stronger Be. "Mmm. Stain was right about you. You're a worthy hero…" The words flowed out without any real thought. The way Deku genuinely cared made her think about how great he was. And everyone knew who was responsible for heroes needing to be more than just good.

Deku's frown deepened. He did not like her obsession with the man, even if a number of people felt the same way on both sides of the fence. Deku had fought the infamous Hero Killer twice in his life, the second time Stain got his wish. He was killed by a Hero he deemed worthy in a grand battle that people still remember. It got the hero Deku on the top ten list, and it was his biggest claim to fame. Stain's break from prison and subsequent retaking of the task to purge the world of impure heroes caused a mass panic. He had become even more vicious since his incarceration and killed three heroes just during the escape. From there he spree killed, losing all hope when he learned that All Might was no more, that Endeavor was the Number One Hero. Refusing to accept it, he began killing en masse to draw out someone worthy. Deku was the one to do so. He despised it like nothing he could have imagined before. "Then you know I'm trying to do what's best. I'm disappointed you'd go against me like this when I'm trying to help you."

"I knowwww." Toga looked down, not wanting those hypnotic green eyes to look at her with disappointment any longer. "I didn't mean to upset you. I just really wanted to paint that for you and it was so frustrating… I'm sorry…." Rather than paying lip service, she let spill a bit of her true self there. Even though her unhealthy obsession with Deku was still very much alive, she was using it to cut away the other parts that would make her dangerous to people. "I know you're only still doing this cause of our promise. But I'm doing better!" Toga was desperate for his approval. She had been for quite some time. Any praise or good word left her lighter than air, but when he disapproved or got angry she shrunk down. It was one of the reasons she preferred being a person. If she WAS Deku, he couldn't be disappointed in her.

"I know, Toga, and you are getting better. We still have some work to do just… Keep up the good work, okay? And I'll get you some red paint." Just as he was about to start on the next step of their meeting he heard a cry for help. He folded the painting back and carefully stowed it before turning his body towards the sound. "I have to go. We'll pick this up tomorrow, alright? Don't be late!" Deku started in a jog and turned into a full sprint before giving a powerful leap. Just like that, he was off, getting several blocks in that one movement.

"Okay. Bye Deku!" Toga ran after him in vain, her arms at her sides in childish manner. Her eyes gleamed as she watched him leap away to save another person. "He kept the painting!" She said with overwhelming joy. With him out of sight, she bent down and grabbed another flower. "He loves me, He loves me not, He loves me, He loves me not…He loves me… Hehehehehe!" Toga giggled with glee as she counted out the petals she pulled. For the first time in quite a while, it came out in favor of the love. The meaningless little game lifted her spirits to near manic levels and she skipped away into the night, swaying her arms. "He loves me!"