"Laughing Matters"
A Star Trek: The Next Generation Story By Lal Soong
Chapter One: The Commission
The virgin ship sat in isolation inside the huge docking bay as she awaited the christening ceremony that would precede her maiden voyage. A smooth hand glided along the edge of the door to her own docking bay, but the door did not open. The main computer had not yet been activated.
The owner of the hand pulled away from the ship and made her way across the docking bay. She sat down at the bar set up to serve the after party and mused about the history that would be made in the night to come. But her musings did not stop there for tonight would only be the beginning.
She pretended to lift a glass for a toast and said, "To the new Enterprise. May her maiden voyage end in success."
She spoke a lot in that statement, for although she'd partaken in its construction, she cared nothing about the new Enterprise's missions beyond the first.
She stood up and walked through the exit.
"Lieutenant?" one of the two guards on duty said as she walked passed them.
"All is secure," she assured him. "She's ready for her christening in a few hours."
Commander Data left his quarters on the Academy grounds and stepped onto the transporter pad that would take him to Starfleet Headquarters. He had just received the message he had been awaiting for hours. The Galileo had arrived. His friends were here.
A moment later as he stepped off the transporter pad inside the boisterous docking bay, Data scanned the crowd for his friends. He spotted Deanna and Worf first and as he made his way passed the crewmen and officers, he noticed Geordi and Barclay across from them. Engaged in conversation, the foursome didn't notice the android approaching them until he was upon them.
"Data!" Deanna exclaimed and didn't hesitate in embracing him. "It's so wonderful to see you. We'll all be together again."
Not quite all of them, Data knew. Captain Picard would soon be taking command of the USS Stargazer-A and Beverly Crusher would be assuming the role of his chief medical officer.
"No place seems quite as much like home as the Enterprise," Data agreed.
"Well, I for one wouldn't want to let anyone else tinker with my ship," Geordi said. He had been placed in charge of designing and constructing the new nova-class starship. The group chuckled lightly. "It will be good to be back home with friends, too."
"And back to active Starfleet duty," Worf said. He and Deanna, his wife of six months, had been spending the past few months on Betazed, her homeworld. Obviously from his tone,
he had not found security on the planet fulfilling.
"May I have everyone's attention," someone said at the far end of the bay. The room quieted down quickly and the group looked toward the speaker to see Admiral Parson standing at the podium. "I'm glad you could all be here tonight to witness the christening of our newest flagship, the nova-class USS Enterprise-E. Furthermore, it is my great honor to present the command of this new ship to one of our finest officers. He has proven his command capability on several occasions, most notably during the Borg attack at Wolf 359. What many of you may not realize, is that he has turned down a promotion to captain on a couple of occasions. It seems he rather liked serving under Captain Picard." This received chuckles from around the room. "Commander William T. Riker, I hereby promote you to the rank of captain and offer you the command of the Federation Starship U.S.S. Enterprise 1701-E. Do you accept this assignment?"
Riker approached the mike and the room fell absolutely silent. "I accept it gladly and thank you, Admiral." He shook Admiral Parson's hand, and everyone immediately broke out into applause.
Parson reached under the podium to produce a champagne bottle. Seconds later, a junior officer approached them with two wine glasses retrieved from the bar and handed one each to Parson and Riker. The officer then took the champagne bottle from the admiral, opened it and poured some into each of their glasses. As they held up their glasses toward the crowd, Parson spoke again:
"To the new Enterprise. May her maiden voyage mark the beginning of a successful journey."
"Here, here," many among the crowd responded as Riker and Parson sipped at their drinks.
Next the admiral and the new captain walked around the podium toward the docked ship. The crowd parted to allow them to pass easily through. The admiral ran his hand along one end of the hull. "Welcome to the world, little lady," he said and raising the champagne glass, he broke it against the hull. Riker did likewise.
The uproar of the crowd grew and there was no need for Parson or Riker to announce that the party had begun. People quickly began forming a line to the bar, while others came closer to the new starship to marvel at its design.
"Shall we take a look inside your new ship?" the admiral asked, raising his voice to be heard over the excited crowd.
"I'd be delighted," Riker responded.
This was the moment Riker had spent his entire career working toward and now that it had arrived, he embraced it with a little apprehension and longing, but most of all with a feeling of triumph. He had enjoyed working under Captain Jean-Luc Picard for seven and a half years, but knew that he was ready for his own command.
Although the Nova-class design was about the same size as its predecessor, it was physically quite different. Riker had never felt so much excitement in all his life. This was his ship to command, to take out into the unknown! She's a beauty, Riker thought.
Parson stepped up to the operations control booth and opened the ship's main shuttlebay door. He returned to Captain Riker's side. "It is only fitting, Will," he said, "that the captain be the first to step into his newly christened ship." He gestured for Riker to step forward.
Smiling, Will stepped inside the new ship and wandered to the center of the bay and turned full circle. In many ways, this ship was much like its predecessor, its main difference coming in the saucer section, which with its angular design, could no longer truly be referred to as a saucer. The engine aboard this ship, though roughly the same size, was predicted to be nearly fifteen percent more efficient than the one housed inside a Galaxy-Class starship. Riker had been told all this and more by a very excited chief engineer, but what he knew most about the new Nova-Class Enterprise-E was that it was his and it was home. He felt great to finally be home.
He was alone for only moment, for eager crew members quickly began filing in to stand behind their new captain. First came Commander Data, who would be serving as his first officer. The android grinned broadly as he examined the bay from every angle. He nodded enthusiastically, obviously eager to serve under Riker's command. Next Worf and Deanna came in followed by Beverly and Geordi. Worf would now serve in Data's old position as second officer, while the others would resume the positions they had held on the Enterprise-D. Behind them, among a group of varied personnel, Lieutenant Mylanos, who had just received a promotion as chief security officer, Doctor Selar and Lieutenant Barclay wandered in.
Will approached the podium, which had been set up especially for the captain's first speech to his crew. He reflected for a moment as he thought about the time several years ago when Captain Jean-Luc Picard had addressed the crew in the same manner. He had not been there to witness it firsthand, but had reviewed the recording afterward. Picard was an incredible man. Riker only hoped he could live up to command responsibility.
"Ladies and gentlemen-crew members of the new Starship Enterprise, we are about to embark on an incredible journey. I know many of you have served aboard other starships-I even recognize a few familiar faces." He paused to smile. "But no matter how many starships you've served on-or how many you will serve on after this one-you have never encountered the mysteries and the adventures that you will on the new Enterprise."
The crew broke out into applause. When they quieted down, Riker said, "Aren't you all supposed to be at a party!" The room filled with laughter. Not a single one of them made for the shuttlebay doors; they were all anxious to man their stations and begin the imminent journey.
Riker watched for everyone to leave the shuttlebay before stepping away from the podium. He paused, spending a few minutes gazing at his ship and dreaming about the journeys they would share. Sighing heavily, he then went through the door. He was amazed at how familiar the corridors seemed. "Welcome home, Captain," he told himself.
He passed Turbolift One and slowly continued. The Bridge would wait for him. He entered Turbolift Three, though it didn't connect with the Bridge and instructed it to take him to engineering. The turbolift brought him to the upper level of engineering. He walked up to the railing and peered down at the crew members busily familiarizing themselves with the new ship.
A phaser blast resulting in a warp core breech had destroyed the other ship, Riker remembered shuddering. Geordi promises that this engine will be fifteen percent more efficient," he reassured himself. This ship would not be so easily destroyed.
The chief engineer looked up. "Captain, is there a problem?"
"No, Geordi," Riker replied, approaching the rung ladder and taking the first step down. "I just wanted to get to know my ship before we're underway." He reached the bottom step and walked toward Geordi. "It may be superstitious, but I think it's a good idea to become friends with her before I order her out on our first mission."
"I understand, sir. I'd feel the same way in your shoes, especially when it's your first mission as captain."
"I know I assumed the role of captain on more than one occasion," Riker mused, wishing he couldn't remember their dealings with the Borg or the time they'd thought Captain Picard was dead when he'd really been infiltrating a group of space pirates. "It's just that this time, once we're out there, there really is no turning back. This ship is mine-for keeps."
A woman walked up to them with a data padd. She was tall, medium build with long ebony hair pulled back in a ponytail. "I've finished the diagnostics you requested, Commander," she said, handing Geordi the padd.
"Thanks, Lieutenant."
"Captain," she said, "I wanted to let you know how honored I feel to be working under your command."
"Don't worry, Lieutenant. I'm sure we'll find plenty to keep you showing your gratitude every step of the way. You look familiar. Have we met before?"
"Lieutenant Angela Grunland, sir. I believe you ordered a Zeldorian brandy earlier."
Will smiled, fondly remembering an encounter at Nailor's Bar the previous night. He had wandered into the bar, hoping to relax before the eventful day ahead of him. Angela had been sitting at the bar in a very revealing red dress. For a moment, she had reminded him of the first time he'd met Deanna on Betazoid. But that had been a long time ago. He needed to live in the present. Deanna was married to Worf now. And Angela, as far as he knew, was single. He felt himself blush; him, the captain blushing! "I almost didn't recognize you without the red dress."
"I'm still in red, Captain."
This received a shake from La Forge, who, embarrassed, looked away from them.
"Yes, indeed." Taken aback, Riker wasn't sure whether to reprimand her. He was the captain, dammit! He should be giving her orders, not allowing her to make him feel like a school-aged boy.
"Don't worry, Captain. Wearing this uniform means a lot to me. I won't disappoint you."
"I'm glad to hear that. Now if you will excuse me, I think I'm needed on the Bridge." He went to Turbolift Two, pleased to have dismissed Angela as abruptly as she had him on their first encounter.
Geordi examined the readout on the data padd. "Lieutenant, what is this?"
"The diagnostics, sir. I by-passed minor subroutines that aren't part of the main system to increase time efficiency."
"You were told to run a Level-One diagnostics. I expected you to follow through on that order."
"But I was only trying to save time. It's a waste to-"
"This is not a game we're playing, Lieutenant." He handed her back the data padd. "Now, run a full diagnostics and show me how important that uniform really is to you."
"Yes, sir," Angela said coolly and turned to leave.
Riker stepped onto the Bridge and sat in the captain's chair. "Mr. Data?" he said, turning toward his android first officer.
"All systems are on-line and functioning within normal parameters, sir."
"That's a good way to start things off." He paused a moment to scan his new bridge. It was larger than the previous Enterprise, he thought, but then wondered if it weren't the new angled design that gave it that illusion. "Ensign Travis, take us out of dock and on my order, engage the warp engines at warp five."
"Aye, sir," the ensign replied.
Everyone watched the main viewer as the ship pulled away from the docking bay. It would be a long time before any of them saw Earth again.
"Engage."
Captain's Log, Stardate 49136.3
This is my first official log as captain aboard the Enterprise-E. After months of eagerly awaiting this ship's completion, we are finally underway. We will be picking up a diplomat and his aides from the planet Restur and will be escorting them to the planet Tausus in the Averyon Sector where he is needed to negotiate the continued peace in that sector.
