Title: A Special, Special Request Forms. General O'Neill and Dr. Jackson.
Fandom: SG1.
Author: Ra'Ay'Mond
Rating: PG-13
Category: Humor?
Spoilers: Need, Upgrades, Absolute Power, Metamorphosis, prophecy, Fragile Balance, Prometheus Unbound, New Order part 2, Brief Candle, Threads and early bits of season nine. Never-ending.
Summary: Jack giving Daniel a hard way too go.
Authors note: General Jack O'Neill is board. And he's taking it out on Daniel.
Disclaimer: The characters mentioned in this story are the property of Showtime and Gekko Film Corp. The Stargate, SG-I, the Goa'uld and all other characters who have appeared in the series STARGATE SG-1 together with the names, titles and backstory are the sole copyright property of MGM-UA Worldwide Television, Gekko Film Corp, Glassner/Wright Double Secret Productions and Stargate SG-I Prod. Ltd. Partnership. This fanfic is not intended as an infringement upon those rights and solely meant for entertainment. All other characters, the story idea and the story itself are the sole property of the author.
I do not own the rights to SG1 or any of their products. I am only a poor fan who NEVER wants the adventure to end.
A Special, Special Request Forms.
By: Ra'Ay'Mond.
Dr. Daniel Jackson unconsciously taps his pencil against the legal pad that is in front of him. He does this while waiting in the conference room that over looks the gate room and gate control room. This is where the SG teams usually have their post mission debriefings. He is waiting for the new commander of the SGC, Brigadier General Jack O'Neill, to make his grand entrance.
Daniel looks around the conference room while waiting for Jack to enter. Every thing looks the same in here. However, without Jack on missions, and with Teal'c's impending departure to help found the Free Jaffa Nation. Nothing in this room, or anywhere else will ever be the same again!
Daniel thinks that the only good thing about Jacks promotion is that he now has more un-interrupted time for his translations. Daniel smiles to himself as he thinks that who ever the new member of SG-1 will be, they are guaranteed not to be as disruptive as Jack was. No more poking around my office during my meetings with the other archeologists. No more juggling 'worth-less rocks', that happen to be laying around on my desk. No more late night viewing of DVD's about the history of curling, and so on.
Daniel is not sure of the real reason that he has been requested, no, ordered to meet with Jack today. The only reason he was given was that it had something too do with his Special Request form.
That in it self seems a little odd. Especially since he has been re-submitting the same forms for the past two years.
He and the rest of SG-1 have been so busy lately, he just keep re-submitting the same form every quarter. Daniel sighs out-loud as he thinks that General Hammond never seemed too have a problem with that. But it seems like Jack does.
Just then, General O'Neill makes his way into the conference room, with Sergeant Walter Harriman in tow. Sgt. Harriman is in the middle of telling the general something as they enter the room. "…your telephone conference with General Hammond and the Joint Chiefs is in twenty minutes sir. Then you have that meeting with the representative from the Tok'ra."
At that mere mention of the Tok'ra, General O'Neill abruptly stops walking. He turns to his sergeant and somewhat tiredly asks, "Can't we, postpone the meeting with the Tok'ra Walter?"
With out missing a beat, Walter Harriman, somewhat exasperatedly says, "Sir, you've already postponed the meeting with the Tok'ra several times this month. I think that they are starting to get a little offended sir." Before General O'Neill can say anything else, Walter tells him, "Sir, you wanted me to remind you that, and I quote "It's better to have them here now and then, where we can see them. Instead of running around the galaxy, out of sight. Doing what ever the hell they want!" Un-quote."
General O'Neill exhales somewhat loudly. He then tilts his head up slightly and opens is eyes wide. He pauses several seconds before asking Walter, "I did say that, didn't I?" Walter then points toward Daniel as he tells him, "Yes sir. And now you have your meeting with Dr. Jackson, as requested."
General O'Neill quickly turns toward Daniel as he makes his way toward a chair opposite his former team member, and says, "No need to get up Dr. Jackson."
A slightly confused Daniel replies, "I wasn't going to." Daniel then quickly looks around the room, and says almost to himself, "Should I get up?"
General O'Neill ignores him as he tells Walter, "OK Walter, That's all for now…" As Walter turns to leave the conference room, he says exactly what his general tells him, as he is telling him. "Walter, come and remind me about the conference call to Hammond and the Joint Chiefs in ten minutes. And hold all of my calls!" Sergeant Harriman then tells his general, "Yes sir."
Walter closes the conference room door behind him after he leaves the room. General O'Neill then over dramatically clinches his fist, as he turns to a still seated Daniel and says, "I hate it when Walter reads my mind like that! It kind of skives me out!" After regaining his composure, he continues, "Well Dr. Jackson, thank you for seeing me on such notice. I just wanted to go over some of the more, confusing items on you Special Request Form"
Daniel loudly drops his pencil on the legal pad in front of him. He is more than a little annoyed as he asks, "Confusing? What do you mean by confusing, General O'Neill?"
General O'Neill takes his seat at the conference table, opposite Daniel as he calmly says, "Why Dr. Jackson, surely a man of education and experience knows the meaning of the word confusing. Bewildering, puzzling, perplexing, baffling and or mystifying."
When Daniel hears this, he cannot help but respond, "Yes, I do know the meaning of the word confusing. I have too say that I am impressed that you seem too know what it means. As well as at least several other words. It seems that your new position has broadened your vocabulary."
General O'Neill does not seem insulted by the last jab this expense. He merely opens a manila folder that he was carrying with him. He goes over the information on it. Without looking up at his young former teammate, he responds, "Dr. Jackson. I was informed that you would cooperate. I have had a look at your record. And although you have some history of disobedience to authority…"
Daniel cannot believe what he is hearing. It is as if his old friend has been replaced by a pod person, or one of Loki's clones. He interrupts by saying, "You've had a look at my record! Are you kidding me Jack?" Once General O'Neill looks Daniel in the eye, Daniel relaxes a little as he tells him, "This is starting to sound more and more like an interview." He then smiles a little as he tells the general, "You do know, I've already got the job."
General O'Neill just looks at Daniel and says, "Yes son, I know. I was there from day one."
Daniel knows that he is taking the bait, but he can't help himself as looks off toward a far corner of the room and says, "No actually, I was hired before you!"
Then as an after thought, Daniel asks, "Jack, did you just call me son?"
General O'Neill continues too flips through the pages of documents that are still unseen by Daniel as he says, "Yes, that jibes with this report. "Col. O'Neill reported to the Cheyenne Mountain Facility several hours after Dr. Jackson. He reports that the solution that seems to have evaded a team of decryption professionals for several years, was solved by Dr. Jackson in a matter of days. There by making the Star Gate operational.""
General O'Neill looks up at Daniel and says, "There's more, "Dr. Jackson was confident that he could find the needed missing symbols once he, and the team lead by Col. Jack O'Neill reached their destination. However, once they reached the other planet, he could not find the needed symbols as promised. There by stranding himself, and the rest of the team."
Daniel is furious when he hears his old friend remind him how he exaggerated his chances of finding the needed missing symbols. He slowly lifts a shaky index finger and furiously points it at Jack as he hisses, "You promised, that you would NEVER throw that at me again! Does it mention how I died, saving your life on that mission?"
For the first time since entering the room, General O'Neill's face takes on the familiar, gentile expression that Daniel is used too. He replies to his old friend, "Yes Daniel, it does mention that."
As Daniel is about too ask Jack what this is all about, General O'Neill once again masks his emotions as he says, "OK. Moving right along. The reason for this meeting today is too find out the reason for some of your more, unusual requests."
Daniel interrupts by pointing at the manila folder that holds his mystery file and says, "Well General Hammond never had a problem that very same Special Request! And I've been re-submitting the same form to him for nearly two years with no problem!"
General O'Neill smiles as he says, "Ah, yes! Well George Hammond is a great commander. However, his emotions sometimes prevent him from dispensing some much needed discipline, to some of his favorite subordinates."
After hearing this, Daniel turns his head slightly as he quickly and quietly says, "Well you ought to know!"
General O'Neill cups his hand against his ear as he says, "Excuse me, I didn't quite catch that!"
Daniel pushes his glasses up as he replies, "Oh, nothing. I was just going over some translations out loud."
At this point Daniel just wants to get this over with. He throws his hands up in defeat as he flops back in his chair and asks, "OK Jack! Which unusual requests are you referring too?"
General O'Neill once again quickly turns a few unseen pages and stops too read the items in question from Daniel's Special Request Forms out loud: "One case of assorted chocolate bars, non-dairy preferred. And, one case of Instant coffee, caffeinated only please." General O'Neill then stops reading. He looks up from his secret file and asks Daniel, "chocolate and coffee? What, no cigarettes, booze and porno mags?"
At first, Daniel thought that this was just another example of Jack's slightly warped sense of humor. However, Daniel is starting to believe that he is not joking. He laughs aloud and says, "I think that all of this power and responsibility has finally sent you over the edge, Jack!"
The general merely says, "Dr. Jackson, I am fully prepaid to give the OK for these, items. I just need to know how they can help you in the performance of you duties. Or, help you to relieve the stress that comes from working here." The general looks back
down to the hidden report as he says, "After all, Jonas never needed any of this stuff when he replaced you. And he did his job just as good as you."
Daniel has a faint memory of Jack saying almost exactly the same thing. He does not remember when or where. However, he pushes aside the task of finding that old memory for the moment. He thinks to himself, 'OK, I can play that game too!' He grins a little as he tells jack, "You know, When General Hammond had this job, if he had something to tell us, he just got to the point. None of this BS that you're becoming a master at."
Daniel notices Jack flinch, just a little, at the comparison between himself and the base's former CO. Daniel continues, "And guess what? When Sam takes us on missions, she gets the job done! She doesn't carelessly eat betrothed cake, have un-protected sex with the natives, pass out, and start aging rapidly."
Jack had a feeling that the Jonas comment was a bit too much. A joke is a joke. However, Daniel can only take so much. He should have told Daniel much earlier that he was just busting-his-chops. However, hearing his old friend joke about a mission where he almost died, he has to be called on that!
Jack bolts up from his seat and yells at Daniel, "Are you nuts? You thank that's funny? I almost died on that mission! Sure I screwed-up! But how the hell was I supposed to know that caked was drugged? It was our first year of gate-hopping! I never heard of nannites, or whatever the hell they are! At least I didn't take anyone down with me. What's gotten into you Daniel?" General O'Neill continues, "You know, for a former ascended being, you are sure developing a nasty disposition! Have you been sleeping in a Goa'uld sarcophagus again?"
Daniel jumps out of his chair as he yells back at Jack, "Are you nuts? Do you think that's funny? That thing turned me into an addict! What's gotten into me?" Daniel looks Jack up-and-down as he says, "What's gotten into you, General Jack O'Neill? I don't see or hear from you in weeks, and when I do it's in the form of an order to meet with you!"
Before Jack can answer, Daniel says, "OK Jack! I give up! Screw the Special Request Form. Screw the SGC, and screw you! I quiet! I was thinking about taking a walk when I found out that Teal'c is leaving the SGC any way!"
Jack notices that while Daniel is ranting, a single, lonely tear rolls down the left side of his young friends face. It lands on his chest, right over his heart. The only thing that keeps Jack from running over and apologizing for this cruel joke-gone-bad, is the fact that he has become paralyzed by what Daniel has just said.
Jack, eyes wide open, slightly sways as he repeats what Daniel has just, "Your thinking about leaving the SGC, because Teal'c is going home? Daniel, I'm sorry. This was meant too be a joke. It just, got out of hand. If I had known about Teal'c leaving…Wait a minute, why am I only hearing about this now? Don't you guys care what I think any more?"
Jack then asks, "Wait, what about Sam? Is she thinking about leaving too?"
Daniel clams down, a bit, and tells Jack, "No. Sam's career military. Even if Teal'c and I leave, I'm sure she'll stay in the Air Force. Maybe request a transfer to area 51."
He continues, "Any way, we knew that you were busy. We figured that when you had some free time, you would come to us." Daniel snaps out of his misery long enough to give Jack a dirty look as he says, "After all, Jonas never needed any of this stuff, when he replaced you. And he did his job just as good as you."
Jack returns the dirty look, as he tells Daniel, "And guess what? When Sam takes us on missions, she gets the job done. She doesn't carelessly eat betrothed cake, have un-protected sex with the natives, pass out, and start aging rapidly."
Daniel slinks a little as he says, "OK, we both could have acted better then we did." He suddenly becomes energized and says, "But I had an excuse!"
Jack, now a little more relax, walks around the table to close the distance between them and asks Daniel, "Now what's this about Teal'c leaving us? When did he say this to you?"
Daniel turns around, and leans against the table top as he stares off into the distance. He then replies, "Jack, he didn't say anything!"
Jack seems a little confused as he asks, "Daniel, if he didn't say that he was thinking about leaving, then how do you know that he's…"
Daniel snaps out of his dream-time. He looks Jack in the eye and says, "Jack, a few days ago I asked Teal'c now that the Jaffa are free, had he given any thought to joining them in setting up their new government?"
After several seconds of silence on Daniel's part, Jack impatiently asks, "Well don't keep me waiting Daniel, what did he say?" Daniel then tells Jack, "That's just it Jack. Teal'c heard every word that I said. Not only did he ignore my question. He just, walked away."
Jack takes a seat on the table next to Daniel. He takes a deep breath and says, "Teal'c is many things, but rude is not one of them. For him to just, walk-away from your question like that shows that he is seriously thinking about…" Jack then turns to face his young friend again as he says, "Leaving the SCG."
As Daniel looks down at the room's carpet, he tells his old friend, "Jack, you know my life's story. Both parents died when I was young. My grand father had better things too do then raise me. He even chose his research over me years later. Shuttled from foster home, to foster home. My career ending in ridicule because of my wild theories about aliens building the Pyramids. My wife, taken as a host by a Goa'uld. She was later killed, while trying to kill me. In her honor, I tried to find and protect her son. Only to find out that Oma was already doing it. Now he's in parts unknown. Oma's gone. And I couldn't even make any friends while I was ascended. At least I don't think that I did."
Jack hears the sadness in his friend's voice, and it's tearing him apart. Daniel then turns toward Jack, and places a hand on his friends shoulder as he says, "Nothing good in my life ever last very long Jack! If this is going to end, I want too chose the time for once. Instead of the time choosing me. Also. I want you too know that, I did miss you! We all did! And in case I've never mentioned it before, I just want you too also know that, I love you Jack!"
Jack puts his hand on Daniel's shoulder, looks deeply into his eyes and says, "I love you too Daniel!"
Sgt. Walter Harriman chooses that exact moment to open the conference room door. He is looking at the floor as he enters the conference room and says, "I'm sorry for the interruption General O'Neill, but you wanted me too notify you five minutes before your teleconference with the joint chiefs."
As Walter looks up, he his startled too see his commanding officer and his civilian friend, in what appears too be a loving embrace. While saying that they love each other.
With out missing a beat, Walter does an about-face, and exits the room while saying, "Sorry for the interruption sirs! I'll remind you in two or three minutes about the teleconference General O'Neill! I'll call you on the conference room's phone. I'll also make sure that you and Dr. Jackson are not interrupted! Good bye sirs!" He then closes the door behind him.
Daniel and Jack just stand there, still embracing each other. It's seconds before the shock wears off. Daniel is the first to speak. He points his thumb toward the door that Walter has just retreated through and says, "Uh, Jack. Shouldn't you take care of that?"
Jack, Still holding Daniel's shoulder says, "Naw! He'll figure it out. He's got this Amazing kreskin, psychic thing going on. Apparently, the rumors about him are true!"
Daniel, still watching the door says, "There are going too be a few rumors flying around here about us if you're wrong!"
Jack gets a little annoyed as he asks, "Oh for crying out loud Daniel! Why would anyone start rumors about us?" At the same time, both men look at them self's embracing each other. Not only do they take their hands off of each other's shoulders, they also jump back from each other in shock, and wipe their hands off on their pants leg.
Jack then says, "Maybe, I should go and explain things to good old Walter."
He then slumps back, and sits on the tabletop again. He looks up at Daniel and says, "Daniel, look at me. Between just finding out about Teal'c going home, you thinking about leaving, and Sam maybe transferring to Area 51, I'm emotionally drained!"
"And if that's not bad enough, now I have to talk too Walter and convince him that we're not, you know." Then I have too have a phone conference with the joint chiefs. And trust me, the moment that I hear Hammonds voice, I wouldn't be surprised if I start crying like Sally Fields at an award show!"
Jack continues, "Trust me Daniel, I'm going to turn a top secret teleconference into a Hall-Mark moment when start blabbering like a baby." Jack then drops his head into his hands as he says, "And then I have to meet with the Tok'ra!"
Daniel thinks for a moment and says, "Wait Jack! How about this! We both explain to Walter what we were talking about when he saw you hugging me."
Jack snaps out of his pity-party long enough to say, "Hey! We were hugging, each other!"
Daniel says, "OK! OK! We'll both talk to Walter. You do the phone conference. And then ALL of SG-1 will meet with the Tok'ra representative."
Jack moves a little closer to Daniel. He then lowers his voice and asks, "ALL of SG-1? Even Jonas?"
Daniel points his finger at Jack as he says, "Don't you start!" He continues, "Seriously Jack, Walter said that he thinks that the Tok'ra are starting too get insulted about the constant re-scheduling. Meeting with all of SG-1 will be sort of, an honor."
Jack gives Daniel a semi-serious look and replies, "Well, someone is sure impressed with their self."
Daniel replies, "Jack, I've had some time too think about every thing that we've done over the years. And I'm sure that even though they would never admit it, even a Tok'ra would be impressed by meeting all of SG-1!"
"Lets face it Jack, sooner or later, we be replaced. But no one can ever take our place. "There will never be another SG-1."
At this, Jack seems noticeably happier. He slaps his hands together as he says, "OK! I'll just clear all of SG-1 meeting the Tok'ra rep with General Hamm….Eh…O'Neill!"
He then remembers that he's the man now. He pauses a moment and says, "OK. Approved!"
They both start walking toward the door as Jack says, "All righty then, let's go have a little talk with Walter!"
Daniel abruptly stops short of the door and tells Jack, "Jack. I want you to promise me something. Promise me that you will not tell Sam about our little…brotherly embrace. I don't want her to get jealous!"
Jack opens his eyes wide, points at Daniel and says, "Now don't you start!"
THE END…
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