It was around the late afternoon on planet Talon IV. The Chozo were a mighty race, far more advanced than humans. This was but one of the planets they inhabited... The others dont matter yet. Anyway, deep in the rainy forests of the planet were our heroes, the mighty Chozo warrior Danoss, and... And a human girl named Samus. The two teenage elites were sent out on a special mission to capture a rogue bio-alien known as... A Metroid...

"God, why couldn't Grey Voice send some other pair to go find his "experiment"?" (Zero Suit) Samus asked Danoss as the two made their way through the dense foliage of Talon IV.

"What's wrong Sammy? This kind of stuff's quality bonding!" Danoss, a muscular teenage Chozo replied as he cut through the palm leaves with his odd shaped machete.

"Pssh, I dont need bonding, I only NEED to be stronger." Samus said, slapping a fly on her cheek. "Besides, you already have YOUR Varia Suit!"

She was right though, wherever he was, Danoss always sported his own grey colored varia suit, a sign of his great power. Meanwhile all Samus had was her extremely attractive Zero Suit and a laser pistol that cant do shit.

"Yeah these things are freakin' awesome." Danoss said, flexing in his suit as an attempt to annoy Samus, which worked. "C'mon Sammy, dont get all riled up! You're gonna get your very own power suit soon!"

"REALLY!? WHE-

"YOUR NEXT BIRTHDAY!" Danoss interrupted gleefully. Only problem was none of the Chozo, or Samus for that matter even knew when her birthday was.

"Oh go to hell." Samus replied, frowning.

"Hey, it's not so bad! Who the heck wants to see you in a big ol' suit anyway? That big ass of yours' gonna make the others go wiiiiilld next mating seas-

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Samus shouted, immediately proceeding to push Danoss, who tumbled down a small hill. But he was right. Samus had quite the sexy bottom.

"Oh, real CLASSY princess!" Danoss said, rubbing the back of his head and standing back up, albeit now on the lower level of the jungle. "You couldn't do that when space pirates appear!? Or do you just enjoy shitting yourself when things get dangerous!?"

Samus was about to give her angry response when suddenly she farted loudly, blowing a few bushes back and causing her to tumble down the same hill, landing on her plump rear.

"Exactly. Now hurry up gass-ass, we dont wanna be out here when it gets dark." Danoss said in a superior manner, picking up his machete and proceeding to continue slashing through the jungle, all while Samus followed, mumbling.

"Shh." You hear that Sam? Danoss said, the jungle suddenly falling silent as he and Samus both entered battle stances.

"Was it the Metroid?" Samus asked, readying her laser pistol.

"You bet... Be careful..." Danoss replied, preparing his machete.

Suddenly, without notice an infantile Metroid leaped from the bushes at Samus, who could not react in time, but in an instant Danoss leaped in front to protect her from it, slashing it with his machete as a gigantic flash of lighting blinded Samus. It then went quiet.

PFFFFRRFFFFTT!

The quiet was broken by Samus' loud fear fart, causing her to blush out of embarrassment. Only to continue with her smelly accidental farts.

"Phew...Its...Its done.." Danoss said, wiping sweat from his forehead.

"What do you mean? Dont you have to freeze metroids then blow 'em up?" Samus asked, farting loudly again.

"Well ignoring the stench of your fear farts.." Danoss began, turning to the Metroid which lay there on the grass motionless. "My machete lets out a static shock strong enough to take these things out on its own. But we dont want to kill it, so its just... Lets say deactivated." He finished, encapsulating the Metroid and placing it on his back.

Samus continued with her uncontrollable fear farts, slipping one by one out of her massive behind as they grew more and more wet.

"Uh oh... If I cant get a grip soon, I think I'm gonna-

Samus was interrupted yet again, but this time by a single, loud, low pitched fart, one that smelled far worse than her regular farts. This could only be a sign that Samus' infamous fear poots, entered the stage of Samus' infamous fear poops.

"Ooooh... I think I went #2..." Samus said, turning her round rear towards Danoss, which was sagging from a large, mushy looking brown load in her suit. "Man, why the hell's it always got to be me..?" Samus moaned sadly, putting her face in her palms and began to weep quietly, continuing to "go #2" out of sorrow.

"... Samus. Take off your zero suit." Danoss asked quietly.

"WHAT!? Why on Tallon IV would I want to do that!?" Samus replied, wiping away her tears and turning back to Danoss.

"C'mon I've known you for years. We've both seen each other naked." Danoss said reassuringly, placing a hand on Samus' shoulder "I dont want you to get an infection hauling that shit around, and if Grey Voice sees you get sick while I'm out with you, the old man's not gonna let me live this down."

Sniffling, Samus gave Danoss a smile before (Somehow) removing her zero suit, handing it to Danoss. Taking it from Samus, Danoss watched as the large mass of brown muck slid directly out of the suit's leg and onto the floor.

"God Sammy, how the hell can your ass make something that stinks so bad!?" Danoss asked, gagging on the smell of the "used" toilet he was holding.

"Aw shut up Dan." Samus replied sarcastically, completely naked in front of Danoss who couldn't help but feel a slight alien erection build up. "Lets go home already.."

Samus turned, heading in the direction they came from, all while her massive derriere was smudged with her... Accident.

"Yo, Sammy"

"Whats u-

"RRRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHH!"

Samus shrieked as Danoss shoved the encapsulated Metroid towards her roaring, as the sight of the Metroid caused Samus to accidentally shart, spraying a large amount of plant life behind her with her poop.

"AHHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA"

"OH, FUCK YOU DAN!"