A man slept soundly in his bed, early in the morning. His nose twitched and he squirmed to better cuddle up under the covers. This man is the main character of our story and the fulfiller of the great prophecy first told by Builderman. However, he doesn't know any of this, and thinks he is only a regular citizen of Robloxia, as are his friends. His friends are his accomplices in the prophecy. But they don't know that either.
Robloxia is a continent located on a planet somewhat not unlike Earth. It has land and water. And that's about where the similarities end. Oh, and people, but they're not humans. Space does not surround the planet, but instead, a gigantic cube called the Skybox. Beyond the Skybox is Nil, where no Robloxians have gone before. No one knows what's there. There are many different lands and territories on Robloxia, namely Noobland, Land of the Hackers, Japwn (pronounced juh pown), Spawn City, and the Forums, which contains several states at constant war with each other.
…Hey, Japwn kind of sounds like Japan. Boom, third similarity.
Along with the lands, there are dimensions, such as Banland or the Scriptbox. And please, do not confuse the Skybox and the Scriptbox. They are two completely different things. Some consider Nil to be a dimension as well, but as no one has reached it, there has been no conclusion.
But enough backstory that we will return to later in the story. The man sleeping soundly in his bed is named Pertho. His last name is not important. Mostly because Robloxians don't have last names. But his name is Pertho. And he is sleeping in his bed which is in his house which is in his neighborhood which is in the state of Off Topic which is in the Forums which is in Robloxia which is on the planet which does not have a name which is in the Skybox. Oh, and here comes his friend, Freik.
Freik's truck careened across Pertho's yard and crashed through his bedroom wall. Debris flew in every direction, even right into Pertho's face. However, Pertho did not wake up. Like I said, he slept soundly in bed. The truck's driver side door opened up and Freik stepped out, grinning. He wore a black fedora which did not match his red t-shirt nor his black jeans.
"Wake up, Pertho!" He shouted.
Pertho remained still.
"HEY!" Freik marched over to Pertho's bedside and promptly smacked him in the face.
"Ow!" Pertho flailed his arms about and kicked his sheet off of the bed. "What the-"
"Surprise!" Freik shouted.
"What are you-" Pertho turned to see Freik's truck protruding from his wall. He stared for a long while, mouth agape, then turned to Freik. "WHAT THE HELL? WHY IS YOUR TRUCK IN MY ROOM!?"
Freik shrugged. "It was something really important, but I can't remember now."
"Well, that's just great." Pertho folded his arms. "I don't have the funds to repair this! Do you know how hard it is to come by robux these days? Especially if you're not a part of Builders Club."
"You could always pay in tickets." Freik suggested.
Pertho glared. "The ratio of tickets to robux is too extreme for me. I hardly have enough to feed myself every night and my job doesn't pay well."
Freik sighed. "Fine, you know what? Here." He pulled a bag out of his pocket and handed it to Pertho. Pertho opened it up and immediately threw it back at Freik with a scream.
"NO!"
"What, that should be enough to pay it off?..."
"That bag is filled with at least five fuse bombs, two flash bangs, and a police baton!"
"Oh. Sorry, that's my personal stuff." He stuffed the bag back into his pocket and looked back up at Pertho who looked disgusted. "Gosh, don't look at me like that. I'll pay you back, I promise."
"It's not just that, stupid!" Pertho clambered out of bed in his silk pajamas. "The Forums are a warzone! If someone finds this… contraband! They'll have your sorry ass in prison!"
"Pffft, this isn't contraband."
"In the Forums it is!" Pertho exclaimed. "Citizens aren't supposed to have weapons! Where did you even get those!?"
"I made a trip out to Roblox City." Freik said smugly.
Pertho's eyes widened. "You got out? H-how? There are jailbots everywhere!"
"Oh, I got out roughly the same way I got into your house. I scrammed right when I heard the sirens. Most of the jailbots were handling some dispute on the border so only one came to investigate. I hid in the tall grass and then BAM! A wild Freik appeared! It used smash jailbot's face screen! It's super effective! Jailbot fainted! Freik gai-"
"Okay, okay I get it. But do you know how serious this is? Someone surely had seen you!"
At that moment, a megaphone screeched right outside the house. The two of them ducked down. "Freik, we know you're in there! Come on out and your accomplice won't get shot in the face multiple times until you're begging for your mommas!"
Pertho turned to Freik and stared at him in shock. Freik smiled an awkward sort of smile. You know, the one where you know you're in trouble and you try to make light of the situation by smiling but no one ever cares.
"I'm gonna count to seventeen and by the time I'm finished you had better be out here! One! Two! Three!"
"What are we gonna do?" Pertho whispered in a panicked tone. "I can't go to jail; I have a pretty much outstanding record in Off Topic! Ooh, I know! Go out there and tell him I had nothing to do with this."
"Okay, first of all, I'm pretty sure the jailbot won't care about what I say."
"Eight! Nine! TEN! Eleven!" The jailbot from outside continued to count.
"Second of all, you would just let me go to jail by myself? That place is terrifying! Come on, just hide me somewhere!"
"I told you! My job is already pretty bad. If I get a nasty mark on my record, how am I gonna get anything better?"
"I'll help you! I've got connections in just about every territory on Robloxia!"
"SEVENTEEN!" The jailbot finished. "Alright, I'll give you a few more seconds. EIGHTEENNINETEENTWENTY! Now I'm comin' in to get you!"
Pertho shoved Freik to the floor and scrambled into his closet. Freik stumbled and tried to get up, but he was grabbed from behind.
"Okay, I give up." Freik went limp.
"Put your hands up!" The jailbot shouted. Freik put his hands up. "Now sing your song!"
"My song?" Freik asked.
"You know, to make the butterflies fly away!"
Freik grinned and turned his head to see that his good friend Jimbo was there. Freik stood and hugged him. "You scared the heck out of me, man."
"Haha, yeah I know."
"That's an… interesting outfit." Freik observed.
Jimbo wore a green camo t-shirt and blue gym shorts. Atop his head was a black beanie labeled "Off Topic Rulse". He was not aware that "rules" was spelled wrong, nor would he care if he was. He was a very laidback guy, the complete opposite of Freik. Oh, except when you mention whoppers, the burgers from Burger Queen. Don't ever mention whoppers around him. However, where were his little friends?
"Oh, hey, turkeys!" Jimbo turned and called through the hole in the wall. "You can come in!"
At least five dozen juvenile turkeys squeezed their way into Pertho's home and gobble gobble gobbled. Freik sat back down, as did Jimbo, and they both pet the turkeys' little heads. Pertho peeked out of his closet and was confused to see that a jailbot was not hauling Freik away on its back.
"Jimbo?" Pertho exited the closet. "What are you doing here?"
"Oh, when Freik mentioned he was going to go tell you something important, I knew he would forget what it was, so I followed him here." Jimbo picked up a turkey and stroked it.
Pertho stared uneasily at the bird, shook his head, and asked, "Well?"
Jimbo looked up. "Well what?"
"What's the important thing Freik was going to tell me?"
"I forgot." Jimbo said blatantly.
"Are you kidding me?"
"Yes, I remember what it is." Jimbo chortled. Wait, he chortled? Who the heck chortles? Chortling is for like, old people. Or fat, portly farmers. Anyway. "There's going to be a big announcement today in Roblox City. Freik heard about it when he got his contraband last night."
Freik clutched a turkey to his chest. "It's not contraband in Roblox City so you can't call it that."
"Whatever." Jimbo brushed him off. "The announcement is gonna be this big event at Roblox Headquarters hosted by Builderman."
"Builderman!?" Pertho sat down next to Jimbo and Freik. "THE Builderman!? He never makes public appearances! This has to be big! We have to go! I'll start packing right away!"
"Slow down, buddy." Jimbo put a hand on Pertho's shoulder. "Freik may have gotten out of the Forums, but you know…" They both glanced at Freik, who was fiddling with one of the fuse bombs, then inched away from him.
"Well, we have to go." Pertho scrunched his eyebrows. "It's a once in a lifetime opportunity! Ooh, what if there's, like, a cash prize? I could pay for the hole Freik made in my wall!"
A turkey approached Pertho with an envelope in its beak. Pertho slowly took the envelope, found it was already open, and removed three letters. One was addressed to Pertho, another to Freik, the last to Jimbo. They each read their letters, which were identical aside from whose name was on it.
Dear Pertho/Freik/Jimbo,
We at Roblox HQ have been observing you for quite awhile now and have come to the conclusion that the three of you are the ones we seek. You all have certain qualities that are required to pass the tests of an adventure we might send you on. We can't disclose what the adventure entails in this letter, lest it fall into the wrong hands. Come to Roblox City and attend the ceremony at the HQ, which will start at 6 PM. Some of the most esteemed individuals shall be there, along with many of the moderators and admins of Robloxia. A select few will be chosen to go on the quest and travel across Robloxia in order to reach the goal.
Three keys are located in the envelope. When you reach Roblox HQ, a guard will ask to see them. Hand them over, and you will gain access to the building. Best of luck to the three of you.
Builderman
Builderman
"How did Builderman know we were gonna be at your house, Pertho?" Freik asked.
"I don't know. He's Builderman. That's why."
All three of the letters had dark smudges on them. The friends thought nothing of it and reached into the envelope. There were only two keys.
"Erm…" Pertho muttered uneasily. "Did… you guys take one of the keys already?"
Freik was taken aback. "How could you accuse me of such a thing?"
"I'm only asking because I sure as hell didn't do it."
"Well, neither did I." Jimbo added, placing his turkey back on the floor. "Do you think it has anything to do with these smudges?"
"Maybe." Pertho said. "I guess we could just let Builderman know when we get to Roblox HQ. Two of us could go in and explain the situation while one stays behind and waits."
All three of them glanced at each other.
"Not it!" Pertho and Jimbo shouted.
"Dang." Freik said.
Once Freik and Jimbo left, Freik backing his truck out of Pertho's wall, Pertho began packing. He fantasized about what kind of adventure they might be able to go on. Maybe they had to go slay a dragon! Or find the mythical Bloxfoot! No no no, they were going to infiltrate an evil organization's base! Wow, that would be awesome.
While that would indeed be awesome, Pertho was correct in assuming all of these things, even if they were not the adventure's purpose. He WOULD, at one point, slay a dragon. He WOULD, at one point, find the mythical Bloxfoot. And he WOULD, at one point, infiltrate an evil organization's base. Pertho was unaware of this, just as he was unaware that he was the fulfiller of the great prophecy first told by Builderman.
He wasn't exactly sure what to pack. The letter was very brief and didn't mention much more than the announcement at Roblox HQ. He figured he should at least pack a suit for the big revelation. He threw some t-shirts and jeans into the suitcase, if they so happened to go out and about for whatever reason. Socks, shoes, personal stuff like shampoo, toothpaste, etc. He realized he should also pack his pajamas for the night(s) there. It was then that he remembered that he hadn't even removed his pajamas. He grabbed some clothes and scurried off into the bathroom to change.
Since I know you don't want me to describe a man changing, I'll just go check on Freik, who is AAAAAAALSO CHANGING OOOOH GOD THAT IS GROSS. Okay okay, Jimbo it is. Luckily, Jimbo was not in his bathroom changing, but rather contemplating the letter. His turkeys fluttered around him, sending feathers into the air. Jimbo shooed them away, saw that he was now covered in dirty feathers, stuck his tongue out in disgust, and…
He decided to go change. Alright, is there anyone else we can go to? I suppose there's a character we haven't introduced yet, but it will require us to go back in time to the previous day. A man sleeps soundly in a closet. Except, he's not sleeping, he's trying not to be found. A shadow copy of himself is rampaging through the house, searching for him. He knows that if he is discovered, the copy will first gag, because the closet really smells, then murder him and continue to escape and terrorize the populace.
The man in the closet is named Clay and he has deemed that his shadow copy shall be called Dark Clay. Clay isn't very creative, despite being an at-home scientist.
ThumpthumpthumpthumpCRASH. Dark Clay tumbled downstairs into the basement and collapsed against the closet door. Clay held his breath, hoping for this to be over soon. Dark Clay stood and shook himself off, almost dog-like. He looked around, growled, and scampered around the room, tossing shelves about like wet paper towels. Sweating frantically and clutching one of the many vases in the closet, Clay couldn't help but think what could have gone wrong with this experiment.
Well, that is, he would've thought that, had one of the shelves being tossed about like wet paper towels not smashed through the closet door and knocked Clay out. When he came to, the shelf was moved out of the way and he was covered in black goo. He supposed that Dark Clay had discovered his unconscious body and thought that he had died.
Clay stood and wiped the gunk from his brown overalls and white undershirt. It stuck to him like that sticky stuff they put on magazine advertisements that have papers that you can actually take out of the magazine. I always liked that stuff. Anyways, he stumbled out of the closet and looked around. Just as he suspected. Wet paper towels everywhere. I mean shelves. Broken shelf pieces were strewn about, any of their contents broken or damaged in some way.
Following the black stuff up the stairs into the kitchen, he found that his entire house looked similar to the basement. Chairs were toppled, tables were smashed, and vases were shattered. Hmmm, except for that one vase over there, in the dining room. It rested on a doily, which rested on a desk. The black goo was on it, but it made up handprints instead of messy, careless smudges like the rest of the house. It was almost as if… Dark Clay had caressed it?
I mean sure, Clay had some pretty strange vase fantasies and he guessed that that would have transferred during the cloning procedure, but… Clay would never caress a vase. That's not what he's into. What was so special about this vase that the others didn't have? WHAT DID IT MEAN?
The vase slipped out of Clay's hands and broke to pieces against the hardwood floor. He stared at it for a moment, grabbed a dustpan, swept it up, and dumped it in a bowl on the dinner table. As he kneeled down to get the shards, he noticed that there were black goo footprints leading from the desk where the vase had been all the way to the front door. This was also curious, because, again, there were no other footprints in the house, only more smudges. Something about that vase changed Dark Clay in some way, and Clay was going to find out what.
Just as Clay was about to step outside, suddenly, Pertho emerged from the bathroom! So now, we go back to the present day, and continue from where we left off. Pertho was now dressed in a black t-shirt and some khaki shorts, his pajamas folded over his arm. He placed them into his suitcase and zipped it closed. What time was it?, he wondered. He glanced at his alarm clock. It was already noon. The announcement was in six hours. He had better get going.
He took his case and was about to leave the room, when he remembered the hole in the wall. Erm, what was he going to do about it? He didn't want to invite burglars into his house, of course. Maybe put a wet paper towel in front of it? I mean a shelf. Wow, why would Pertho think to put a towel over it, let alone the wet paper kind? He didn't even have a towel that big. Also, he was fairly sure that by the way his house was designed, that hole should have sent his roof crumbling. But it didn't? That's strange.
Or he could… tell a jailbot about the situation? Maybe one could keep watch while he was gone? No, they're always so busy! Ugh, why did Freik have to drive his stupid truck through Pertho's wall!? Pertho grabbed his suitcase, tossed it at a lamp which shattered, and flopped onto his bed in a fit of rage. Stupid stupid STUPID Freik!
"I'm not going!" Pertho sobbed into his bedsheets. "I hate Freik! I don't want anything to do with him! Forget about this big adventure, even it would be a lot of fun!"
He laid there for a long while, at least a few hours, exactly three, but he didn't know or care. His cell phone rang in his pocket. He took it, saw it was Freik calling, and tossed it at the hole in the wall. It grazed one of the edges, which was just barely holding up the ceiling. Pertho's roof imploded and trapped him under the debris.
And he was knocked unconscious. So, with a heavy heart, we must end our story here.
But no! This was not the end for our hero. Boy, that would be a very boring ending to a very short story. Let's go to Freik and Jimbo, who had been waiting for Pertho at the gates to Off Topic. Jimbo was still wearing the same clothes, covered in feathers. I guess he changed his mind about changing. Haha! Isn't that funny. He changed his mind about changing. Comedic genius. I'm writing that down for later. Anyways, Freik was now wearing a beige trench coat, a matching fedora, and Groucho glasses. He was totally inconspicuous.
"Hello, stranger." Freik said to Jimbo. "Have you seen a man named Pertho around here?"
"Freik, that disguise is ridiculous." Jimbo chided. "Anyone could see right through it."
"Untrue, stranger! Jailbots can't even tell me from a regular Off Topic citizen."
A coffin-shaped robot squeaked by the pair. It had a screen on the front which displayed a pixelated face, and moved around using a little tire under its chassis. The jailbot nodded respectfully to Freik. "Inconspicuous regular Off Topic citizen."
Freik nodded back. "Jailbot number 249."
The pixelated face on the screen smiled, then went back to frowning, and continued on its way. Jailbots almost perpetually frown. They're programmed to show little to no emotion.
Jimbo ignored the entire scene and looked around for Pertho. The two of them were standing next to Freik's truck in the parking lot of the Off Topic gates. Visitors rarely ever came through to Off Topic, or any part of the Forums really, because of the fact that it's a warzone. I mean, not ALL of it is a warzone of course. It's about one half residential and one half military. I'm not even sure how that works. The combat area is only separated by a barbed wire fence and even then there are jets that drop bombs from above all the time. The residents are in real danger. Like Roblox HQ cares.
"That's it. I'm calling him." Freik pulled out his cell phone, one that was really outdated. Like one of those flip phones. At least you can flip them open quickly and make yourself look real cool and slick.
Snorting, Jimbo continued to scan the area. Nearly the entire parking lot was empty. A few stray cars backed out of their parking spaces and left never to return. Except for when they needed to return and leave the state, which they probably wouldn't be allowed to do anyways.
"Ugh, it went straight to voicemail." Freik slapped his phone together sassily and put it back into his coat pocket. "We should just go pick him up at his house."
"I suppose, but you really shouldn't drive through his wall again."
"That was an accident. I swear. I think."
Freik hopped in the front seat of his truck and Jimbo, after moving several of his turkeys off of the seat, got in as well. Freik glared at the turkeys and looked towards Jimbo as he turned the key in the ignition.
"My truck is going to be so gross."
"Pfft, like you care. You've driven your truck through like, four walls in the past week. Not even counting today."
"That's different. My baby and I, we have a rough relationship. It's just how we roll. Or drive." He rubbed the dashboard and the rear view mirror fell from the ceiling. "I can fix that."
"Shut up and drive." Jimbo ordered.
"You know, that would be a really good name for a song."
Pertho, on the brink of death, thought about his life. It had been fairly boring, he didn't travel, he didn't date, he didn't have family. His job sucked, and so did his house, which was now in ruins. Even if he happened to make it out of this situation, which would be substantially rare, where would he live? Not with Freik, he's insane. Not with Jimbo, he's got those stupid turkeys. And definitely not with that scientist who lives across the street. Hey wait a second, how did that guy even get clearance for his equipment? He could be developing revolutionary chemical warfare or something!
Man, it was getting hard to breathe. Chunks of roof weighed down his limbs and shingles dug into his skin. He just couldn't see how it was possible to get out of this situation, if only some sort of savior were to come and save him!
And in a complete turn of events, a single man dug his way through the rubble and pulled up Pertho's nearly lifeless body. This man was not Freik, Jimbo, or even Clay.
And no, it was not Dark Clay either.
Pertho coughed and looked up at his savior. But like all mysterious heroes, he was gone before Pertho could thank him.
Then Freik's truck sped through the neighborhood and landed in the pile of house debris.
"COME ON, PERTHO! WE'RE LATE!" Freik shouted.
