Disclaimer: The following is an old Labyrinth fan fiction I wrote for a Labyrinth fan fiction group years. Labyrinth belongs to Henson. Most, if not all, of the Labyrinth fan fiction I am going to post here is at least ten years old, if not older. You will see the original dates they were written placed into these documents. These fan fictions predate the canon of Return to Labyrinth.

To: .

Subject: [labyfic] Mind over matter (Part 1 of 4)

From:

Date: Fri, 16 Mar 2001 19:17:49 EST

Mind over matter

(David Bowie doesn't seem to mind and it doesn't matter)

(Yes, I have lost my mind. And I blame David Bowie and that's why I

am writing this. Let's see just what happens when an insane man wishes away

ALL the voices in his head!)

"Crikey, Buster, how gobsmackingly presumptous you are! Do you

know how many f--king personas I get through a day!?! Do you have any idea

how crowded the dinner table gets in this house. And they all have their own

opinions. None of them mine. I bet you're not even one of them are you? Are

you one of my opinions? I thought not. Until you've walked in my shoes, or

rather, until I've walked in my shoes I should bloody well 'shut up' until

I'm asked for my opinion, shan't I? =E2=80=A6I'm sorry, I have to go and see my

doctor. " - David Bowie.

Disclaimer: I do not own Jareth and I most certainly do NOT own

David Bowie or his character portrayals.

David Bowie personas and or characters of this story:

David Robert Jones------------ A young struggling, singer/ painter (Bowie

before he became David Bowie)

Jareth ------------- Goblin King *(Labyrinth)*

Ziggy Stardust---- Sexually "Free", angst and drug induced rock persona out

for a good time- believing himself to be a messiah from Mars, singing his

message of sexual liberty through Rock 'n roll music. (The rise and fall of

Ziggy Stardust and the spiders from Mars)

Major Tom------------ (Astronaut of Space Oddity and Ashes to Ashes the

song, somewhat similar to The man who fell to Earth)

Hallowe'en Jack ------- Ziggy Stardust, while obsessed with the novel 1984,

with an eye patch, post apocalyptic Ziggy Stardust.

Aladdin Sane------------ Ziggy Stardust with a different make up job,

supposedly more mature.

Thomas Jerome Newton----------- Melancholy, alcoholic alien who had his

vision destroyed by x-rays. (The man who fell to Earth) Also known as

Spaceboy

The Thin White Duke------------ A drug induced persona believing himself to

be The man who fell to Earth- delusional man. (Album, Station to Station)

Monte------- Habitual liar, bad gambler ( The Linguini Incident)

Mr. Rice------------ Four hundred year old man, kept alive by potions

(Exhuming Mr. Rice AKA Mr. Rice's secret)

Paul---- Somewhat dazed gigolo (Just another gigolo)

Major Jack Celliers --------------- A prisoner of war- soldier of world war

two (Merry Christmas Mr. Lawrence.)

John Blaylock--------- Rapidly Aging Vampire (The Hunger)

Vendice Partners --------------------- (Absolute Beginners)

The Shark ------------------------- A shark (Yellowbeard)

Colin Morris ----------------------- A nerd (In to the Night)

Pontius Pilate ----------------- (The last temptation of Christ)

Phillip Jeffries -------------------- (Twin Peaks: Fire walk with me)

Andy Warhol ----------------------- (Basquiat, if you don't know who Andy

Warhol was you have my contempt and dislike)

Bernie ---------------------------- Gangster under blackmail over his

sexual desires. The second hand of a Mafia like group. (Everybody loves sun

shine AKA Busted)

A gun-toting pistolero ------------------------ ( Il Mio West )

Mefastophalies ------------------------- The Devil (Faust- the play)

The elephant man ---------------------------- (The Elephant man)

The leader of the dreamers---------------( Omikaron- the computer game) (I

hope I spelt that right)

Johnny ------------------------ An American, jealous, dancing, lover,

stalker, who batters his wife. (The song I'm afraid of Americans, John, I'm

only dancing, John, I'm only dancing (again), Repetition)

Baby Grace----------------- A high teenaged girl

Thursday -------------- (Thursday's child, a man whining about growing old)

The ref --------------------------- Zoolander the movie

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

They say that there are many aspects to the human mind, like the

tiny facets to a crystal. What if that crystal were to shatter or were

cracked?

Mind over matter

(David Bowie doesn't seem to mind and it doesn't matter)

The fight for control and power:

The place was a desolate, burnt, and dried up wasteland of drug

induced nightmares, paranoid beliefs, bits and pieces of science fiction

novel, text, half remembered musical chords, and sexual angst. The air was

cold, but this was a cold, savage, brutal and bitter place, and very dark.

But what would you expect? This was the inside of David Bowie's mind!

There were about twenty eight of them, all very similar men and they

had been fighting for domination and control of this barren, empty world.

Jareth, The Goblin King stepped forward on to the hill over

looking the rail road tracks.

The wreckage of the train could be seen for several kilometers off.

Of course he had heard the screams and that's why he had re-emerged, even

from the far other side of this strange, dark, surreal world. The other side

of it had been where all things "wholesome" had been repressed and he had

flown over this strange lost plane of innocence in the form of a barn owl.

He had been in search of the only rumoured to have ever existed-

David Bowie's virginity, to no avail.

"Well," he had thought, "at least we have the package it came

in"

At that very moment, Thomas Jerome Newton (the only real alien

of the lot) came walking up the side of the hill to meet Jareth. Thomas

Jerome Newton was out of his human disguise, meaning that he was completely

naked. He was utterly hairless. His large cat-like eyes blinked, the

vertical irises of his eyes quivered as he narrowed his eyes at the sight of

the monorail wreckage. He had no nipples or genitalia.

Jareth folded his arms and muttered "I stand corrected."

"I heard the crash." Said the alien in a somewhat exhausted

tone. "What happened?"

"Nothing important." Jareth said, cynically. "'His' (meaning

their creator) train of thought merely derailed yet again."

"Oh, dear" the alien shook his head. "Was anyone hurt?"

"Ziggy Stardust was riding it, I believe. But he didn't hurt

anything of grave importance. He was thrown from one of the cars in the

explosion and landed on his head."

Thomas Jerome Newton turned his head to look at Jareth directly. He

blinked his large cat-like eyes, not entirely understanding. It took him a

few moments to remember just what part of this "human" mind Ziggy Stardust

represented. "...I suppose it all depends upon which head."

Jareth looked over Thomas' alien form as if for the fist time. A

disgusted expression crossed his countenance. "For God's sake, man, put your

disguise back on! You're NOT appealing, naked! Go on, move! Don't make me

have to kick you down this hill!"

To: .

Subject: [labyfic] Mind over matter (Part 2 of 4)

From:

Date: Fri, 16 Mar 2001 19:18:11 EST

Shortly after ridding himself of his alien shadow, Jareth appeared at

the sight of the wreckage, which had been David Bowie's train of thought.

John Blaylock (the vampire of the group) was digging through the

wreckage, he could have sworn he had smelt fresh blood. And he was starved.

He would not feed from Ziggy Stardust. He, as many of the others, had no way

of knowing where he had been. He would not feed from Thomas Jerome Newton.

He was not even human. He tried to feed from Jareth but found himself

dangling over the Bog of eternal stench for that once.

Monte stood idly by, as were many others, near to the disaster.

Monte shook his head. "You see what happens after over half a decade of none

stop drug use. No wonder we can't keep the railroads open. I'm surprised

there is any train of thought that passes through here at all!"

Thursday, (the oldest looking persona there) looked around at the

staring faces. "All right! Which one of you can I blame for the 1970's drug

binge?! Come on! You destroyed most of our world? Out with it! Which one

of you did it?"

Hallowe'en Jack shifted his one eye (which was not covered by an eye patch)

at the Thin White Duke who seemed to be trying to deliberately inhale paint

fumes from off of Andy Warhol's jacket.

Once The Thin White Duke realized that all eyes were staring at

him he pried his nose away from the paint stained fabric. He looked around.

"What?"

"Give me that!" Andy Warhol snatched his jacket away from the Thin

White Duke and promptly smacked him across the face.

Monte rolled his eyes. "I say we kill him."

John Blaylock leaped for joy.

"No, I did no say you could feed on him! We don't need a vampire

who's addicted to cocaine polluted blood."

John Blaylock whined. "But that's all we have here!"

David Robert Jones (the youngest looking of the group, still in

his teens) climbed up on to over turned caboose of the train to gain the

attention of the others.

"Everyone. Everyone!"

But no one would listen. The idle chatter carried on.

"Hey, look, it's Mick Jagger!" David Robert Jones finally

shouted.

That caught their attention.

"So glad you've finally decided to notice me. I mean, after all,

I was the first one here! Speaking of being here... Are we all here?" The

boy looked around, his mop of tangled hair blew in to his slightly mismatched

eyes. Then he realized that everything was a little too quiet and ordered.

"Where's Ziggy Stardust and Aladdin Sane?"

Phillip Jeffries cried out from the crowd "Ziggy Stardust went off to

make love with his ego. You do the math!"

David Robert Jones sighed. "All right, does anyone know where Thomas Jerome

Newton is?"

Jareth replied from the edge of the scene "I believe he went home to

change."

Bernie blinked his eyes, knowing full well who and what Thomas

Jerome Newton was. "Home?"

Jareth sighed. "It was a figure of speech. He's simply putting on

his human contact lenses behind the biggest obstruction here."

The gun-toting pistolero asked "You mean the memory gap between 1975

and 1980?"

"No," said Baby Grace, the only truly female one present. "He means

the promise to write a follow up album to Outside 1."

"Oh." The gun-toting pistolero nodded.

"I'm here!" Thomas Jerome Newton called as he made his way

through the crowd, nearly falling once or twice. His semi-normal, "human"

looking contact lenses were now in place over his cat-like eyes. Now he had

two blue eyes, with the left pupil a bit larger then the right, much like the

others. He now bore a mop of red hair. Only the long bangs which brushed

towards his eyes were highlighted an orange-ish yellow. He was completely

dressed now. However he was still pulling on his trousers, causing him to

stumble as he made his way through the crowd. He wore slightly tinted

spectacles over his weak, light-sensitive eyes.

"Good." Said David, Robert Jones. "But we still need Ziggy and

Aladdin Sane here."

"Leave that to me." Vendice Partners said as he shouted at the top

of his lungs "BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU!"

There came a loud scream and then the sound of stampeding

clip-clops of platformed shoes. Ziggy Stardust and Aladdin Sane came

running from a distance.

"AGGHH!" Screamed Aladdin Sane who leaped in to Hallowe'en Jack's

arms. Hallowe'en Jack was just as, if not more so terrified of Big Brother

then Aladdin Sane. He quickly dropped him and ran behind Mr. Rice,

whimpering pathetically.

Ziggy Stardust, on the other hand, had his arms tightly wrapped

around Thomas Jerome Newton's legs and cowered in a little ball-like

formation at his feet. "Speakin' as one Martian to another 'ere, man... Hide

me! HIDE ME!"

Ziggy Stardust became impatient with Thomas Jerome Newton's lack

of reaction.

As if the two shared a unit though, Ziggy Stardust ran to Aladdin Sane

and the two held tight and close to one and other.

"Hold me!" Ziggy Stardust cried to Aladdin Sane. And then

"No, lower."

"Then we're all present and accounted for." Said David Robert

Jones, not really reacting to the scene. "Now, do you know why I've summoned

all of you here?" And then he focused his attention to one in the crowd.

"John! JOHN!"

John Blaylock dropped Major Jack Celliers' limp body to the

floor and wiped the blood from his mouth. "What?" he asked innocently.

"You're not allowed to kill the other personas!" shouted Colin

Morris.

"Says who?"

"I said so!" Replied the shark, from behind Colin Morris.

"EVERYONE PLEASE BE QUIET! I have an important announcement!"

cried David Robert Jones in frustration.

"What is it?" Asked Pontius Pilate.

"Has glitter and Glam come back in to fashion?" Asked

Aladdin Sane.

"Has Labyrinth been re-released to VHS video tape and DVD?"

asked Jareth.

"Has Queen finally been inducted in to the rock 'n roll hall

of fame?" asked Paul.

"Did Americans FINALLY allowed homosexuals in to the military?"

asked Bernie.

"Have they finally released a film that fictionalized and

glorifies my life story and named it after my song- Velvet Goldmine?" asked

Ziggy Stardust.

Andy Warhol pretended to cough at Ziggy Stardust's statement and

between coughs it appeared he had said "(coughs) Rip off of The Velvet

Underground (coughs)"

"Have they decided to make The man who fell to Earth in to a

Broadway musical?" asked Thomas Jerome Newton, meekly.

The crowd turned and stared at Thomas Jerome Newton as if he had

sprouted a second head.

The Elephant man was just about to ask Thomas Jerome Newton if he

had lost his mind when David Robert Jones spoke up.

"Well, to answer all of your questions.... yes. Even to the one

about the musical." He shuddered slightly at the thought.

A loud cheer went up from the crowd. "GLITTER'S COOL AGAIN!

WOOHOO!"

"But that's not why I called all of you here!"

"All right." Said The leader of the dreamers. "Let him

speak. Just why have you called all of us here, Davey?"

"Well," Said David Robert Jones. "We're in our mid-fifties

now. And it's nearly been exactly thirty years to the day that we had first

allowed Ziggy Stardust to take control."

Johnny muttered under his breath "How could we forget?" His eyes

shifted over Baby Grace. Of course he was sexually attracted to her. She

was the only one there who was actually female, though Ziggy Stardust came in

at a close second.

"That mustn't ever happen again." Said Monte as he shook his

head in disgust. Many of the others nodded in agreement.

"'Ey!" Shouted Ziggy Stardust "What was so bad about my bein'

in control a everything? I mean, I did leave 'em with some far out stories

and songs."

"Yes." Argued Thursday. "But you nearly drove us ALL mad in the

process."

Ziggy Stardust looked at him as if he hadn't said anything at all.

"And....?"

"And it mustn't ever happen again."

"And... " Said David Robert Jones, interrupting the

conversation." I think it's time again that we choose a new leader. To

guide all of us in to the new millennium. Do we have any nominations?"

His eyes swept over the crowd.

The Thin White duke was snorting a "mysterious" white substance

from off of a mirror.

Ziggy Stardust now had seated himself with his legs crossed,

picking his nose.

Mefastophalies stepped forward "Being the incarnation of absolute

evil I nominate myself!"

"No!" cried Major Tom. "No! No! I absolutely forbid it! Don't

you remember the last time we allowed Satan here to take control? That was

in the mid-eighties."

Thomas Jerome Newton protested. "But I had liked the album

Tonight."

Jareth chimed in. "You're a tone deaf, usually pissed alien! You

would! And you're being partial because the only interesting single off of

it was 'Loving the alien'"

Thomas Jerome Newton took a step back. "You wouldn't treat me

like this if Mary-Lou were here!"

"If that idiot, hillbilly were here I'd strangle you!" Jareth

shouted.

"'Ey!" Ziggy Stardust shouted. "Ease off, man! The bloke's

bones are hallow. Ifin' I's wanted ta I could crush 'em."

"Oh, you're just playing favourites because he's an alien!"

"I don't see no problem with that."

John Blaylock wiped some more fresh blood from his mouth,

he had just taken a few sips of blood from Mr. Rice and Pontius Pilate. "If

Mary-Lou's here can I feed on her?"

Phillip Jeffries placed a hand on John Blaylock's shoulder.

"You wouldn't want to. Trust me on this one, mate. That woman's blood is so

thin from inbreeding it would be like drinking tap water."

"Or more or less like diluted gin." Said Monte.

The gun-toting pistolero took his turn now. "All I know is that if

that woman's here, I refuse to lend Newton my gun again! The last time I got

it back it was covered in alien slime."

Thomas Jerome Newton cleared his throat and said in a rather quiet

tone. "That wasn't slime."

"Then what was it?" He narrowed his eyes at him suspiciously.

Thomas Jerome Newton began to walk away as if ignoring the question.

"T.J, you get back here! What the Hell was on my gun?! Newton! Get

back here, Newton! Newton, are you listening to me?!? THOMAS!!!"

Thomas Jerome Newton pretended not to here him and continued to walk

away.

Jareth leaned against a near by wall, rotating a crystal orb in his

hand. "It figures. He's already a legally blind alien, why not also deaf?"

"He acts like it some times."

"I don't think he's all too keen on answerin' your question,

there." Ziggy Stardust said.

"I just want to know what the Hell he got on my gun and why it smells

like-" Before he could finish his statement he was interrupted.

"Oh, God!" David Robert Jones smacked his forehead. "I think I'm

going to be ill."

Then it slowly dawned on the gun-toting pistolero and he screamed,

throwing the gun from his holster to the ground.

"Damn it! Now, I have to buy a new one!"

"Don't worry." Said Monte. "I have one loaded with blanks I was

going to use to rob a restaurant." He then quickly corrected himself. "I

mean put on a show with as a prop!" He reached under his jacket to pull out

the gun. He quickly realized it was not there. "Oh, no! The little shite's

going to get it!"

"Don't worry." Jareth said reassuringly. "We'll lynch the sex

happy alien later."

Ziggy Stardust screamed. "AGGGHHHHH!"

"Not you!"

Ziggy Stardust sighed in relief and collapsed to the ground.

The reff, who had been standing a little too close to Ziggy

Stardust placed his hands over his ears.

To: .

Subject: [labyfic] Mind over matter (Part 3 of 4)

From:

Date: Fri, 16 Mar 2001 19:18:24 EST

Phillip Jeffries looked over at Jareth. "Jareth, would you stop

playing with your balls! it's irritating!"

David Robert Jones spoke up on Jareth's behalf. "But he put down

his crystal orb a few moments ago... " The he realized. "Oh.... OH! Crikey,

Jareth, stop that! "

A few minutes later, Thomas Jerome Newton returned to the scene.

His expression was most serene. He handed the gun back over to Monte.

Monte backed away from the weapon. "Er.... You can keep it..."

Thursday climbed up on to the over turned train caboose with David Robert

Jones. "Everyone! Please, we have to find a leader!"

Jareth raised his hand in to the air. "I nominate myself because

I AM The Goblin King after all. And let's face it, some of us here are not

much brighter then goblins."

Ziggy, seated in a pile of dirt on the ground pulled a large

wad of green snot from his nose, and studied it on the tip of his finger for

a long while, "'ey! I resemble that remark!"

"I rest my case." Jareth said coldly.

Major Tom raised a hand in to the air. "I nominate myself

because I WAS our first real hit! Can you imagine Space Oddity without me?"

Ziggy Stardust leaped up and down. "Owwe! Owwe! I nominate

myself because I'm the coolest and ya know it!"

"NO!" the crowd shouted in unison against Ziggy Stardust.

Hallowe'en Jack raised his hand in to the air. "I nominate me

'cause The Diamond Dogs rule, man!"

Aladdin Sane shouted "I nominate myself." He then looked over at

The Thin White Duke's cocaine mirror and looked down at his reflection.

"God, I'm beautiful!"

"I'm the pretty one!" argued Ziggy. "I love me."

Aladdin Sane stepped over to Ziggy Stardust and took his hand

affectionately. "I love me, too."

"Fancy a rogerin'?"

"Of course!"

The two skipped off together, arm in arm.

Thomas Jerome Newton stepped forward. "I nominate myself

because I am the most intelligent of us all."

Paul frowned. "Somehow I find that very depressing."

Monte sighed. "But he is right, you know."

"I know, that's why I find it so depressing. I mean... LOOK at

him!" He gestured over at Thomas Jerome Newton.

Thomas Jerome Newton held a flask of gin in his hand and was

pouring some in to a glass. He did not seem to notice that anyone was

watching him. He became frustrated that he kept spilling it on his shirt.

Finally his thin, trembling hands slipped and the glass shattered to the

ground. He frowned and groaned sadly at the spilt liquour. Then he

shrugged and began to drink the gin straight from the flask.

Mr. Rice took a turn. "I nominate myself because I'm the oldest

and therefor the most experienced."

Thursday took his turn. "Yes, but I look the oldest and I know

how to work a computer."

"Yeah, well, I've mastered interplanetary travel." Argued Thomas

Jerome Newton, whom was now pissed. "Who here has mastered interplanetary

travel? Raise your hand!"

Jareth stepped in front of Thomas Jerome Newton as to

deliberately intimidate him. "All right, who here has mastered

interplanetary travel... AND has NOT crashed in to a lake?"

Thomas lowered his hand in shame. "That was NOT my fault!"

"The Hell it wasn't! You were driving!"

"I...."

"You what?"

"I thought the water was pretty... I was... distracted..."

Jareth laughed and then made a grand, flamboyant gesture towards

Thomas Jerome Newton. "The most intelligent of us all, ladies and

gentlemen!"

"My God, you're right." Said John Blaylock to Paul. "That is

depressing."

After a moment or two of silence The Thin white Duke raised his

hand. And it appeared that he was about to nominate himself. "I... Uhh....

Umm.... I... Uh...."

"Yeah, you think on it." Said Jareth in a rather patronizing

tone.

Monte stood up "I bet you two million dollars that I

can rule this place AND marry an American woman before the week is out."

"NO!" the crowd shouted in unison.

The leader of the dreamers protested. "It's your fault we were

married to Angela Bowie!"

"That's not true, I didn't exist yet!"

"Well, we have to blame someone!"

Since everyone tried to nominate themselves it appeared that the

voting for a leader would have to be postponed.

To: .

Subject: [labyfic] Mind over matter (Part 4 of 4)

From:

Date: Fri, 16 Mar 2001 19:18:45 EST

That night, in the most barren part of David Bowie's mind,

Jareth stood waiting for the two he had called upon.

He knew that no one would interrupt of disturb them. It was

a barren desert. And a tumbleweed rolled by Jareth's booted foot.

A wolf howled in the far distance. This had to be the

emptiest, quietest, most uninhabited part of David Bowie's mind. This was

where all of his good intentions were kept. ...it was empty...

Finally, clip clopping against the hard ground in his bright red

platformed shoes Ziggy Stardust came.

"This 'ad better be important, man. Ya called me away from me ego!"

"Be patient. Aladdin Sane will just have to wait." Said Jareth as

he folded his arms. "We're waiting for one more."

"Cool! We're 'avin' an orgy or somethin'?"

"No, you fool! Just shut up and wait and listen when he gets here."

A few minutes later, Thomas Jerome Newton, wearing his hooded

jacket came walking across the barren plane. His hands rested in his

pockets.

"Why have you called us here, Jareth?"

Jareth smiled a cunning, Cheshire cat-like grin. "To put it

simply, I wish to rule this place and I wish to have you two assist me."

"But I don't understand. Why us?"

"Well, Tommy, you are sadly enough, the intellect, if

there is such a thing in this place. And let's face it." Jareth gestured to

himself. "'I' am the most seductive and charismatic."

"And what about him." Thomas Jerome Newton pointed toward

Ziggy Stardust whom was staring with deep fascination at a piece of string

and seemed to be in a deep trance.

"He's simply, somehow, the most popular."

"And you want him for the sake of public relations because of

his popularity?"

"Precisely."

Thomas Jerome Newton took a moment to consider this. "All

right. What shall we do?"

"Easily enough." Jareth said. "With my leadership, charm, and

charisma, with your intelligence and my ability to exploit people with

intelligence, and his-" he gestured to Ziggy Stardust "-well... and with

him... we'll rule all of Bowiedome!"

-------------------------------------------------------

The formation of David Bowie's company Ultra Star had been Thomas

Jerome Newton's doing as BowieNet had also been a product of his "genius."

Ziggy sang, and released the albums.

And Jareth, being the most egotistical of the three took the credit

for everything.

Finally one evening Jareth stormed in to the small cluttered

office, which was the center of David Bowie's thought. "All right! Which

one of you did it? Which one of you impregnated Iman?!"

Thomas Jerome Newton looked up from his paper work. "Hmm?

What? Oh, that was Ziggy's doing."

Ziggy Stardust had been throwing glitter out of a bucket all

over the room to celebrate. And he paused. "I get ta name it right?"

Thomas Jerome Newton finished writing something and looked over

at Ziggy Stardust. "We're NOT naming it Zowie! We're calling it Alex."

"Zowie."

"Alex."

"Zowie."

"Alex."

"Zowie."

"Alex."

"Zowie."

"Alex."

"Zowie."

"Alex."

"Zowie."

"Alex!"

Jareth stepped between Thomas Jerome Newton and Ziggy

Stardust. "I'll handle this."

"Alex!"

"Zowie!"

"Alex!"

"Zowie!"

"Alex!"

"Zowie!"

"Alex!"

"Zowie!"

"Alex!"

"Zowie!"

"Alex!"

"Zowie!"

"Alex!"

"Zowie!"

Then Jareth paused for a moment. "Zowie!"

"Alex! I said we're namin' it Alex and that's final!"

Ziggy Stardust stamped down his foot.

"All right then, if you insist. You win. We're naming

it Alex."

"Cool," Ziggy began to chant in a sing-song sort of

taunting tone. "I get my way! I get my way! I get my... 'ey.... wait a

moment..."

Jareth stood in front of him with his arms folded.

"Yes?"

"Uhh....."

"I thought so."

Thomas Jerome Newton reached up from his seat and,

trembling he lightly tugged at Jareth's shirt sleeve. "Er... Jareth...."

"Yes?"

"We... seem to have another slight problem..."

"Oh, and what is that?"

Thomas Jerome Newton held up a piece of paper, which

read, in bold letters "Ziggy 2002: The return of Ziggy Stardust!"

Both Thomas Jerome Newton and Jareth turned, looking at

Ziggy Stardust, who was sitting, upside down in an office chair, his red

fiery hair brushing against the floor. "Now, watch who's in control, mates!"

And his rosy pink lips parted as the barren wasteland of

David Bowie's mind echoed with the mad laughter of Ziggy Stardust.

Thomas Jerome Newton gasped. "Blimey!" He looked worriedly

at Jareth. "I'm frightened."

Jareth nodded. Terror was more then apparent in his eyes.

"So am I. So am I...."

The end