It was her choice. It had always been her choice, and he wouldn't deny her of that freedom. It would be disrespectful to her, his only love, if he tried to control her life.
…and consequently, who she cared about.
We went on an adventure together. We spent time and hung out together; she even helped me out on my uncle's farm for a year or so! But...But that still wasn't enough, I guess. Not enough to make her love me more than a space alien she's known for a month or two now.
The Dee pulled his paws closer around his cheeks, wishing he'd done like his family and worn a hat. It hadn't been raining when he first headed out, but the weather had changed unexpectedly, leaving him alone under a tree—though, he hadn't originally been alone, in some ways. He'd been following a friend, trying to summon the courage to greet her, but failing. Approaching her would confirm the rumors he'd heard, and though he'd kept his cool so far, he didn't want to push his luck in case something truly pushed him over his limits. Like a Dark Matter drone or some other possessor using his emotions to control him. He did not want to be possessed again. But then, she'd been possessed by Dark Matter as well. She'd know what it was like; she'd forgive him!
But, would Meta Knight? Maybe? The Dee sighed. Probably. He's nice like that, even if he hadn't been possessed himself.
...Wait. Uh, has he been possessed before? Who knows. Who knows anything about him, except—no. He winced, not wanting to finish the thought. He wouldn't. It was a lie. He absolutely wouldn't think about—
Except Adeleine.
It wasn't right to be angry at either of them. He'd never expressed his true feelings for her, despite having all that time to confess them. He'd held some sort of foolish delusion that she loved him back, and nothing would change that, even if he didn't tell her. After all, who else would she fall for? She'd spent all the time in the world with him…but apparently, that hadn't been enough to convey that he loved her.
He supposed a verbal confession would have been much better. Even if she'd rejected him, he would have known that he at least tried, and there were multiple types of 'love' for her to assume he felt for her. Friendship? Familial? Love wasn't required to be romantic in nature, after all. And it had been a few years since that adventure now. Adeleine was older, and her kind only lived half was long as his. It would make sense that, since she was now a young adult, she would want to find a proper mate to spend the rest of her days with.
'Mate'. Is that really the proper word? Romantically, I guess, but she's like a cappy and he's a puffball! They're so different!
…
Oh wait. I'm pretty much like a puffball, aren't I. I'm no more justified than he is.
But why would Adeleine choose a puffball she barely knew over someone she'd known for years? Meta Knight was a nice person. He wouldn't deny that. The sapphire puffball was an ideal choice for a mate; he was a star child, natural fighter, worked for the king, and had more skill with technology and higher-level...everything that one could put aside his flaws. There was no reason why Adeleine shouldn't want him as her mate. It would be stupid not to. That would be like a girl turning down an offer of love from Kirby or their king. They were too good of people to not want them.
Why…Why didn't she pick Kirby? Wait, maybe that was a dumb question. Kirby had other love interests that could be seen very clearly, and Adeleine respected that. Yet another reminder of how great a person she was.
So kind, so caring to everyone. Always wanting to step out of her way to make someone feel better, and go that extra mile to cheer up someone who felt down. Willing to put her own barren past behind her and focus on the present and the future, backed with a balanced amount of determination and focus so that she completed what she cared about, but never devoted willpower on a futile endeavor. She was cheerful and sociable, but never shallow or fake to keep up an image. She was just herself, and everybody loved her for it. Especially him.
…and, apparently, Meta Knight.
But we were still so much closer than she is to Meta Knight…or, are we? I can't say anymore, since they're clearly dating, so they have to be close…
Why didn't she pick me? Where'd I go wrong? Yeah, everyone likes a swordsman, but I thought Adeleine didn't like technological stuff very much, and that's basically his second profession. I thought Adeleine liked art, and writing, and poetry, not…nerd stuff. If things were just based on weaponry, maybe I should've picked up a sword or spear. A bow and a parasol just can't cut it anymore, I guess. But who knows if that was even what she wanted? She picked him; she made that choice. And she didn't pick me.
'What she wanted.'
That. That simple thought right there was why he could only bring himself to feel upset or depressed about her choice of relationship, instead of the usual anger and jealousy that was tied to romantic rejection. And it was such a good thing to most people, but the lack of his anger and jealousy to pursue the loss of his would-be mate just reminded him of his lack of motivation to pursue her in the first place—as if he could go after her now. Her blueberry-colored boyfriend was certainly powerful enough to floor him in a fight for her love. And while he doubted that the puff would go that far, he knew regardless that if he really loved the human girl, he wouldn't hesitate to fight for her, even if he didn't want to. Something that both of them had in common, it seemed…though it worked far better in Meta Knight's situation than his own.
It was his main dilemma: he loved her so much that even if he couldn't be with her to make her happy, just knowing that she was content with life was enough to satisfy him.
He was upset that she didn't feel the same love he felt for her; that much would always remain true. But Adeleine still loved him even if it wasn't in the way he'd hoped, and just knowing that was almost as good as an actual romantic relationship with her. He cared about her so deeply, so selflessly, that he couldn't be angry at anyone that brought her happiness. Even Meta Knight. But the sapphire puffball could never change the fact that the Dee loved her, and if that little tidbit ever got out to anyone…well, it wasn't like they could deny it. He couldn't even deny it himself. He could feel jealous, envious beyond belief, but never anger at them.
Jealous?
The Dee flinched, feeling slightly guilty at that...but it was true, no matter how he twisted it. He really envied the sapphire puffball, almost too much. He would have given anything (well, except maybe his mind) to be in the puff's position when Adeleine pulled him into a hug, sat him on her lap or head, let him help with her paintings, or—or when she kissed him, mainly because it was followed by the 'I love you' that he so desperately desired from her. No matter how happy he made Adeleine, Meta Knight would always be the one to bring her romantic happiness, and nothing could change that now—or at least, nothing could change it easily. And counting on someone breaking up usually just led the third wheel into despair…but it wasn't bad to dream, was it?
…Wait.
Was it so bad to pretend and imagine that he was in the sapphire puff's shoes, receiving that attention from Adeleine instead? There was nothing wrong with just thinking that, was there? He wasn't actually going to try and ruin their relationship; he just...
You just still love her, don't you?
It was wrong to love another person's mate romantically, wasn't it?
But you're not doing anything to hurt them; you just love her! That—That's not bad at
It was. He didn't need to be told that; he'd naturally be protective if someone was trying to steal his mate in any way, shape, or thought. And while—quite obviously—he still would have preferred himself being with Adeleine, Meta Knight was still a far better alternative than any other disasters of boyfriends that she could have ended up with. He couldn't deny that.
He's a nice person. He's smart. He's polite. He can protect her and provide for her, and give her anything she wanted. And it's not like he hates Dees, like a cappy; he's friends with Waddle Dees too. You wouldn't even be reminding yourself why you should like him if Adeleine hadn't been involved in this.
Though he knew that was true, he didn't feel very persuaded by those thoughts. He felt about as cold and alone as he was sitting under this tree in the rain.
Come on, he needs a person like her more than you do. He's so shy, he needs a friend, and someone to be so close to. If she had been any other girl, you would've encouraged him to do this. He's put in enough work to enjoy having girls like him.
But why couldn't he enjoy her company as a friend, instead of…instead of this?
He makes Adeleine happy. Isn't that enough to satisfy you? Humans only live for a century, after all. You'd be lonely for the other half of your life.
But Meta Knight's species lived far longer than almost any other species; wouldn't that be a factor in both of their choices, then?
If you aren't mad, why don't you just move on? There's no reason you should hang around sulking when you can't get her back, Ben. Be a man and toughen up. There are plenty of other girls out there, and most of them are probably your own species, too. Things will be better for you, romantically, and Adeleine will still be your friend, right?
…Stop—Stop thinking like this! I-It's better not to spoil your happy memories with her, or question your friendship like this! Just leave them alone. You're—You're past the point of getting angry and hating them, right?
He was. But that didn't change one tiny detail; one that would have made coping with things so much easier.
You already know why you can't get her back, remember?
Adeleine's laughter filled his thoughts, the usually-pleasant sound not bringing cheer to him…in this particular memory, at least.
"Oh, Benjamen, it's really funny how we got together." The artist pulled the blue puffball into her arms and cradled him against her chest. With any other person he'd known for just a month or so, Meta Knight would have looked a lot more uncomfortable with this, but for Adeleine, things seemed to have changed. "You know, before I met my puffy pal here, I thought it was the guy who was supposed to confess to the girl, not the other way around! Never thought I'd have to make the first move in a relationship; geez…although, I never thought too much about a relationship at all, so that makes sense!"
How could he be mad at Meta Knight for 'stealing' his mate when Adeleine had given herself to him instead?
"It's—just not fair," the Dee whispered, pawing the rain and tears away from his eyes. "It's so, so not fair…"
No. It was fair, and that's why it hurt so much. He'd let Adeleine make her choice, so that she didn't make one she'd be unhappy with. Right?
Even if he'd asked, she still had a choice. And she didn't have to choose him. She could have still chosen her puffball instead, or…someone else.
You had all that time, knowing that they were hanging out together—no, you had years to confess to her before she even showed any romantic interest in him or fell for him. Just because you wanted her to choose herself didn't mean that you couldn't let her know that you cared about her that way!
Would it have been easier or harder if Meta Knight had confessed first, instead of Adeleine? Deep down, he knew it didn't matter, but at least he could have been angry at the puffball in that case...instead of himself.
B-But, they could still break up!
...But then, Adeleine would be unhappy. Why would she break up with a guy like Meta Knight? One of them, or both of them, would have to be really angry or upset to want out of the relationship. Adeleine's perfect, and Meta Knight doesn't really like hurting people, I guess, maybe. He's so polite to Adeleine all the time, what could he make her angry about? Being used as her doormat? Maybe not being used as her doormat? No, Adeleine, would never use anyone as a doormat. She respects and loves everyone for who they are, so why would she abandon a friend?
Adeleine doesn't abandon her friends, ever.
She still kinda loved him. Well, she did love him; no 'kinda' involved. She loved him, Kirby, Meta Knight, Ribbon, Dedede—and any kindhearted person in the world, no matter how small the sliver of good in their heart was. That was one of the reasons he loved her so much. And while her love for him wasn't necessarily romantic, wasn't that enough for him?
No. It'll never be. But it's close enough, I guess.
Would she still choose her best friend as a romantic partner, if things went badly with her puffball? What if he'd never earned romantic interest from her at all, and just thought he had?
It's a weird relationship. We aren't the same species, and you see how Meta Knight is handling the height difference. You're friends; you've fought together and saved each other. You're heroes, and you're friends. Shouldn't that be enough to satisfy you?
His heart was still torn up about things—ripped to shreds, in fact. He'd tried so hard to impress Adeleine; he'd gone out of his way to ensure he'd done everything he could to make her happy. He'd saved her life, and she'd saved his. They'd both sacrificed for each other. No one could deny how close they were, and yet…had that still not been enough to win her love?
Romantic love, he reminded himself. Maybe that was your mistake. She did know that you loved her, but…maybe as family, instead, or something.
I shouldn't have left it so open-ended for her. Maybe if I hadn't deluded myself into thinking she knew how I felt, I'd be with her under this tree right now.
All he'd wanted was for her to be happy with her choice. He'd always told himself that if she didn't pick him, it was for the better, because she wouldn't have been as happy if she'd lied and gone with him against her will, right? And she was happy now, with Meta Knight. She took her pick, and she seemed to be enjoying it. And since she was happy…wasn't that enough to satisfy his thoughts? It was her choice. He'd always left it in her power to decide, no matter what happened. Even if he ended up regretting it. That's…what he'd chosen.
Stupid Ben. If you didn't even care enough to confess to her, then you don't care enough to be her mate. The Waddle Dee shook his body roughly, trying to get rid of all the rainwater drenching his fur. You should've thought about what you wanted before you left your choice up to her.
But in the end, what did Adeleine really want? That was up to her to decide, wasn't it?
The Dee pulled an enormous leaf down from the tree, using it as an umbrella as he headed out into the rain. Dwelling on his regrets wouldn't help the future, and it certainly wouldn't help him out here when he could be at home, in a house or a tent.
Adeleine, I-I've always tried to make you happy. To help make things the way you wanted them. So, I hope you're always happy with your choices, okay? Even—Even if other people aren't happy with them...including me.
C/N: An older version of this does exist (on a sideblog with a past friend that I'm sure nobody will ever find), so just to save myself from my own copyright issue: The person 'Cosine Theta' who wrote that version is me...if you couldn't tell by the other headcanons and quartet fics/crossposts on the blog from my supreme uploading laziness. ...Please don't look for the original. Just some advice.
Also, thanks to Metanaito-kyou as per usual for drawing the cover for this fic! ^^
(Can't respond to PMs right now, BTW; apologies.)
EDIT: Thanks to my pal Destiny Willowleaf for pointing out how many ellipses there were in this. (Wow, were there really 96 of them originally? There's only 30 now and I barely notice a change; holy Nova...) Despite knowing that I overuse them a lot throughout my writing, I didn't think it was that bad when I skimmed the beginning...but as the nights grow later, Cos throws in ellipses everywhere like she's competing for a prize. Which I almost won, apparently...If I'm competing against HWC, does that mean higher-level science is to blame?
