Prologue

The vast, endless sea

I dwell in the unknown

The wind gently ruffles my hair.

The more I walk, the lonelier I get

The more I love, the more heartbroken I become

Blame Fate, because she let me meet you in my life

But she forbade us to see each other every day

I asked the world, What is love?

Why can't we stay together when we were meant to?

The flying sand blows into my eyes

I didn't cry because of you – I didn't want you to get worried

You can walk your path, I'll endure my pain

I wipe my tears away and bravely stand up

I wonder why the world is so cruel

I didn't want to get drunk – I'm just full of regret

Once I go, I won't be coming back; I don't even want to turn my head around.

I don't know when in my life we'd meet again.


Silence lingered between two figures on the rooftop.

"Tezuka…you're really going to Germany, aren't you?"

Fuji himself knew that he had been asking this the millionth time. He knew it was the truth – but he wasn't ready to accept it yet. He didn't know if he'd ever be ready to accept this formidable truth.

"I am."

"…"

Fuji didn't know what to say. All he did was lean on the walls that prevented him from jumping down the building.

"I guess love won't work between us, will it?"

"What do you mean, Fuji?"

"Iie, it's nothing…"

Yes, Fuji did love Tezuka. Love conquers all - what a meaningless phrase. And he wondered if this was how it felt to lose someone dear to you. He laughed at his own naïveté, though he hardly found anything amusing. He closed his eyes and smiled. Tezuka didn't notice that his lips were quivering a little.

"Can I accompany you to the airport?" he asked.

"Sure. But if you don't want to, don't force yourself."

"Well, if I didn't want to, I wouldn't ask you."

"I'd be departing next Thursday, at around nine at night…"

"I'll meet you at your place at around six then."

"Ahh."


Fuji stuck his hands deep in his pockets, trying to put his footsteps in sync with Tezuka's.

What a stupid act, he thought. It isn't as if you're connected with him in any way except being friends…

They were walking towards the boarding gate in Tokyo airport. Outside of the windows, the sky was black and the fewest of stars shone in faltering light, which looked like blinking. Parts of the sky was pink from all the rain-drenched clouds, and the other parts were a deep, velvety blue that seemed to stretch into eternity. Crowds of tourists were around them, waiting to board the planes, with occasional sounds of jets taking flight.

Just like you, Tezuka. You're taking flight.

Noises were all around them and yet the only sounds they heard were their footsteps and the wheels of Tezuka's suitcases. These sounds stopped as soon as they reached the gate of his departure.

Fuji closed his eyes and pulled a smile across his lips.

"When you come back, you'll be the perfect Tezuka Kunimitsu, even more perfect than before – you'll be bathed in the glory of professional tennis," he said in his soft voice. "I'm happy for you."

"Thank you, Fuji," Tezuka replied humbly. Even if it was his departure, his features were still pulled into a stern expression. His eyes, however – were softened, a mixture of longing and sadness, Fuji noticed.

"Can I hug you?" he asked. Tezuka merely nodded, but taking it nothing more as an indication of friendship.

Fuji pulled him into a hug, but let go immediately, as if he were afraid of something.

"Good bye, Tezuka," he said. "Hopefully, I'll see you soon."

"Ahh."

With that Tezuka turned around and disappeared into the crowd. Fuji watched his footsteps, those confident strides that echoed in his mind a million times, that he could never forget.

You'll pursue your path; I'll endure the pain.


To be continued