You guys are getting lucky. Because these two are not leaving me alone, and I have way too many fic ideas, and I really should be working on Lacquer, but. -_-;;This idea came from a doujinshi that mentioned Izaya and Shizuo being alike because they were both 'not human'. And I went on from that :)

Enjoy!


Wrapped in my Displeasure

"Oh, Shizu-chan, why do you always come after me?" Izaya said with a tragic twirl of his hands and a melodramatic shake of his head, jacket fluttering with his movements like a ragdoll's dress, "Even when I'm just minding my own business and touring through 'Bukuro. So unfair."

Shizuo growled, stepping forward and rolling his shoulders in a smooth, elegant movement, cars zooming behind him and silhouettes walking stiffly past the park that had suddenly become utterly empty, "Because I hate your guts, louse."

Izaya's eyes flicked upward, a dash of scarlet underneath a flutter of eyelashes, and it would be called nearly coy if it weren't for the malice lurking in those eyes, "Oh, what a coincidence. The feeling happens to be mutual. Imagine that."

Izaya hopped onto a thick metal fence, feet poised expertly on the faintly rounded surface, arms flailing about, giving the illusion of teeter-tottering on the edge of disaster when truly, he knew how well within his limits he was, "Say, Shizu-chan, aren't you ever going to tell me why you hate me so much? Surely you aren't still holding a grudge over that little framing incident during high school?"

"Oh, I've already pounded you into the ground enough to make up for that," Shizuo said gravely, knuckles cracking ominously, a noise that would have made just about anyone else run away at this point. Izaya could almost paint the smirk that he was sure would soon come on Shizuo's pretty little mouth, and thought about asking Shizuo what kind of toothpaste he used to get such pearly whites. Sure enough, Shizuo grit his teeth in a smirk that was more of a predatory snarl, "I don't need a reason to hate someone like you. Everything you do reeks, louse."

"Touché," Izaya mocked, bending at the waist slightly to get to Shizuo's eye level, "So very eloquent you are. Can't even come up with a good reason to hate me, even though there are so many to pick from! Try a little harder next time, will you?"

He hopped off the fence on the opposite side, an effective barrier between them, turning around to drape his arms over it and rest his head on his crossed arms, tapping the tip of his shoe on the pavement, "Want in on a little secret?"

Shizuo had surprisingly enough not grabbed onto any urban stationary object to renovate into a weapon, though it was only a matter of time. Probably the only thing holding him back was the fact that his boss was standing on the opposite side of the street conversing with a client, and it probably wouldn't do to start a brawl when he was about to leave. Though of course, if Izaya goaded him enough, that wasn't likely to be a good enough deterrent. He was holding the cigarette on his mouth like it might snap any moment, and Izaya knew that was when his time would be up.

"I love humans," Izaya began, one hand upturned explanatorily, "All of them."

Shizuo scoffed, his grip on the cigarette tightening imperceptibly.

"So do you want to know why I hate you?" Izaya was positively gleeful, watching Shizuo make the connections that Izaya knew he would, with that low self-esteem and self-hatred that he harbored inside. It was delicious, the richest dark chocolate he could imagine as Shizuo turned that rage and hatred previously aimed at Izaya inward, and the pain in his eyes was so exquisitely sharp and devoid of hope or redemption that Izaya felt his heart swell, his adrenaline spiking and making him tremble all over.

"Yes, yes, Shizu-chan, exactly!" he cried, laughter bubbling up uninhibitedly as he gripped the fence and leaned forward in excitement, "It's because you're not human! You're a monster!"

The cigarette snapped, and Izaya's laughter was abruptly cut off, body tensing, ready to bolt as soon as the cigarette hit the pavement and Shizuo ground it into an ashy pulp. But there was no further movement from Shizuo, his head lowered so that Izaya could not catch his eyes behind the blond bangs.

The cigarette fell to the ground, but it lay there, untouched, the red ember glow sputtering and darkening until it was completely snuffed out, and still Shizuo did not move. Izaya narrowed his eyes, debating whether to push his luck and make a jibe, What, did I hit a sore spot, Shizu-chan?

"Of course. It's why everyone hates me," Shizuo finally muttered, and though his voice was the same monotone, matter-of-fact way it always was, there was something about it that bothered Izaya. Something was missing that suddenly made him so much less interesting. There was… a spark missing, and Izaya normally liked snuffing the spirit out of his victims, loved watching the life fade from their eyes as they faced their worst demons; it was better than any drug out there. But in Shizuo it only made him boring, uninteresting, as unworthy of his attentions as a robot would be.

Shizuo stepped on the fallen cigarette, not bothering to grind it into nonexistence the way he usually did, stuck his hands in his pockets, shoulders faintly hunched, and turned around to walk away.

"What the fuck," Izaya muttered to himself, pissed at this sudden turn of events. But what was he supposed to do? Fucking apologize? Izaya scoffed, watching Shizuo's steadily retreating back.

Still, once again Shizuo had defied his expectations, "Damn," he murmured to himself, tongue clicking in irritation, "This is the real reason why I hate you. You never follow my rules."


Hope you've enjoyed it! They are way too fascinating, and I want people to do more things with them! Things past the angry!sex.