A one shot I hope you like, it's just a lot of fluff reall with a good light on Jenny, because she's not so bad.
There are times when Nick awakes in the night, drenched in cold sweat, fear pulsing through his ravaged body. If it never happened, how come he can remember? How come she is still there, floating before his eyes, plaguing his tortured dreams? How come he can still feel her lips pressed against his in urgent want and longing? The answers, he has always thought, will never come to him. It seemed that he was to spend his days just pondering the lost what if's and how's.
A tear crept from his pained eye; Jenny Lewis only made matters worse. She, as he liked to think, had despised him ever since their first meeting. He can't blame her; he had called her Claudia repeatedly. Thinking about her name sent his rational thoughts out, pushing in only thoughts of her…a woman who never existed, who never loved him the way he still loves her.
Pain like this, he thought, pain of losing the woman you are madly in love with, was incomparable with anything else a human could endure. He had wanted to collapse, he had wanted to break down into too many tears, he had wanted to show what he felt…and yet he couldn't, because no one knew Claudia Brown.
There were countless times when he reached out to the space beside him, something he used to do when Helen first went missing, yet this was different, this is Claudia, a woman who never even stepped foot in his house. The hurt he felt just staring at the unoccupied stretch of bed beside him brought clouded tears to his eyes, wishing that somehow, perhaps just once, that she could lie there, beside him. He knew it would never happen, he knew she had gone for good. But he wanted to hold her, wanted to kiss her just one last time.
He laid there a little longer, imagining some form of Claudia's ghost lying alongside him. It was pure pain, an aching in his torn heart which he couldn't heal. She will never be there; she will never smile at him again, tease him, or playfully banter with him. It never happened, it never happened.
He rolled over onto his back, staring at the whitewash ceiling, he believed that if he continued to work with the anomalies, that maybe, just maybe, he'd be able to find a way to bring her back.
It was stupid, lying there, hoping that something he knew might never happen will somehow occur. He sat up, looking around him, just in case the universe had put wrongs to rights, but it was a false hope, and he knew it'd never happen.
It was a knock on his door which startled him; it'd gone past one and who in their right mind would call on him at such an hour? Throwing back the covers, he sprinted across the landing, down the stairs and to the front door…he opened it and his heart stopped.
Claudia looked at him, tears down her wounded face as she stood there, lost for words. He was confused, overjoyed and upset all at the same time. She muttered something about an anomaly but he didn't care, he pulled her into his arms and kissed her, feeling her kiss him back just as passionately. He didn't want to know how or why, he only wanted to know she was alright.
-
It was a woman's soft voice that woke him, lifting his throbbing head; Nick stared back into Jenny's eyes. She looked a little concerned with his bemused expression.
He rubbed his eyes, yawning as he did so, 'How long have I been asleep?'
She shrugged, 'Two hours or so, everyone else left.'
There was a hint of gentleness in her voice he had never heard before, it took him a little by surprise, he replied, 'I suppose I ought to go home…'
Jenny nodded, picking up several files from his messy desk, 'Don't worry, I'll get these done for you…get some rest.'
Nick watched her, grateful. He noted how much more…accepting she seemed to be nowadays. Smiling slightly, he stood.
At least he hadn't lost all of Claudia Brown.
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GPR
