I couldn't help but to feel that I could have added some things in for both my character and for John and Sherlock. I've made those additions and made corrections to errors I did not spot earlier.
I apologize for any inconvenience.
I couldn't stop coughing.
I coughed, and coughed, and continued to do so for a good while. I fell to my knees, and my brother caught me. He was panicked. "Fifth time this morning… We need to get you-". I shook my head and squeezed his hand, "No, no way! I'm going to school! Science fair is today, and I want to actually see what the judges say!" I whined at him with a wheezing breath. He frowned, "but this isn't normal for an eleven year old!"
"I want to go to the fucking science fair!" He frowned; I made a mistake. "No swearing when I'm the one in charge. I don't care if you learned it from that bloody drunkard or not, but you will not say that sort of stuff around me!" I could only nod, hiding my wince I made as I felt my heart sink. My brother and I were all we had left. He was preparing for his second year of sixth-form, and was fending for the both of us in a small flat. Tony was working almost full time, and balancing his senior year just to make sure we had food and could keep up with the very low price of rent the owner of the flat offered to us. It was enough, though; we were content because we could have each other. He had me, and I had him. His girlfriend was a part of our life, too; she pitched in her savings as well to help us any way she could; even when Tony refused she did it.
But I often felt like a burden… I couldn't do anything, as I was helpless with some sickness no one could describe, and it's been getting worse and worse. I'm just was useless baggage.
We got ready to head to school and waited for Stacy to come over, but my coughing came back up again. It was light this time, so I recovered easily. Tony could only frown more as he opened the door for Stacy. She saw me and she knew what he was frowning for. They kissed and talked for a moment, and then the coughing came again.
This time, I tasted an odd metal taste.
I continued to cough, and my brother started yelling. Why was he yelling? Why was he holding me, and why is his shirt all red? It was such a nice blue…
After some time, I woke up in some weird bed. Strange men were looking at me, and I was scared. I must be at the hospital again, and my brother was angry. I could hear him yelling at someone.
"You know what? PISS OFF! Take your bloody damned money elsewhere; I'm not letting you do that!"
I could hear a cold voice. Actually, it must have belonged to the tall man looking in I think was an organizer, and there was a lady in all black and was face first in her cell phone. "Tony, you don't have a choice. I'm afraid that he only has a day at most to live at this point. By putting him in this experiment, we can ensure a vaccine will be given to him, even if it takes some time. Samples were already taken from him when he arrived, so nothing will happen to him while in stasis."
My brother must have been hard time agreeing, because he went silent as all he, Stacy, and the two entered the room I was in. The strange man sat next to me, "My name is Mycroft. I'm sure you overheard us?" I nodded, and Tony looked down, "Then you know somewhat. Your body is invaded with an unknown virus that is not leaving you so long to live. However…" He began to explain to me what would happen to me next. I tried to understand to my best what was going on, but it was difficult to. There was so much I didn't understand, so I just nodded. I figured he knew I couldn't catch up, because he stopped after all the nodding, and patted my shoulder.
All I could remember next was a nurse putting a needle into me, and soon I slowly felt my body fading. All I wanted to do now was sleep.
Sherlock Holmes and John Watson stood shoulder to shoulder, staring at the warehouse. The clues were leading here? Why would the culprit possibly have anything to do with a warehouse? John looked over to Sherlock, "Are you sure?"
"Of course. He wouldn't have easily made such a mistake."
"Unless he's just luring us."
They stared at each other, and then walked forward into the warehouse. The place sure did see better days, as the inside of the large was cluttered with boxes of seemingly junk, broken windows, and rust. Sherlock grimaced, "this place stinks of boring."
John sighed as they kept looking. Nothing was out of the ordinary; must of the boxes had collected at least ten or more years of dust, and nothing seemed to have been moved for such a long time.
John then saw Sherlock hunched over a set of heavy boxes. "John, these have been moved just recently. Help me with these."
They took a moment to move the boxes, and Sherlock smiled. There was a trapdoor, and it was just used, considering the condition of the door compared to the he rest of the warehouse. The two quickly moved through, and found an entirely new area, at least the size of a small laboratory. Two strange capsules were stationed and open, but inactive.
Sherlock and John began to look around to room. It was certainly in use, as all the equipment was new and up to date. John accessed the computer near the stance machines, and find that he could get access to the computer without a problem.
"Sherlock." John motioned him over, "these machines seemed to be some kind of-"
"Stasis device... But for who?"
Suddenly the two found themselves subdued by unknown people. They struggled but they were outnumbered as they were forced into the capsules. The doors soon were closed as one of the men began working the computer. The capsules soon started to get colder and colder, and all that John and Sherlock now felt like doing now was sleeping.
