This is depressing.
Tarnished Tragedy - Painless Passing
It was a tragedy really, that a boy so young could even consider it for the briefest of moments. Alec knew this, he did, but he couldn't bring himself to actually care. He was a tragedy, he'd known that for longer than he could be bothered to remember, so really it was nothing new. He was pathetic and weak and well… Pathetic. And maybe he'd always been, even when he was just a tiny child hobbling around with his very first steps.
But, as previously stated, Alec couldn't bring himself to care. The word was slipping away now and he was gladly letting it go. He had no reason to hold onto it, after all. His siblings would be upset, was his last fleeting thought as everything went dark. It was okay, though. They'd be fine, they'd get over it. This was better for everyone. This was the only way. The best way. This was good, this was right. This was what needed to happen.
There was a note placed on his bed for them, only for them because there was no one else who'd need an explanation. There was another tragedy. Alec only had two people who would even blink an eye at his passing and they were both his siblings which meant they pretty much had to care. Alec had never minded being alone until suddenly he hadn't been and then when the aloneness had crept back on him, he'd suddenly been unable to live with it.
This was really the only thing he wanted that he could have.
He couldn't feel the blood running down his hands anymore. No, Alec was finally, finally, blissfully numb. He couldn't feel the tears run down his cheeks. He couldn't feel the last shaky breath his body forced him to take. He couldn't feel his arms hit the water. He couldn't feel the water rush to cover his wounds.
He couldn't feel himself leave, but he knew he had.
He didn't believe them. It was obviously just a ruse to get him to go and take their older brother back, and that he wouldn't do. This was better for the both of them and it would be the best way to gain happiness, though Magnus couldn't care less if the other half of the failed relationship was happy or not. He deserved to hurt just a little for the way he'd hurt Magnus. He was being bitter, he knew, but he couldn't help it. He'd really, truly loved the boy and he'd tried to have him killed. Who wouldn't be bitter?
He didn't believe them so he didn't go over to the institute until two weeks had passed and they hadn't stopped trying to get a hold of him.
It was eerily quiet, this new place he found himself in. The wind made no sounds as it shook the trees and blew his hair in his face. Even the wails of the others who surrounded him were silent. It was like somebody had simply pressed the mute button on life, or death. Whatever this was because honestly Alec didn't know what it was. He wasn't dead, not yet, but he wasn't alive either, he knew that much. He was somewhere in between.
Alec decided he'd be content to spend forever there if he had to because it was better than anywhere he'd ever known. Even a world full of silence was better than one without love.
His body was paler than it should have been and an incessant beeping filled the room every other second. Not often enough for Magnus' liking. He'd thought they were lying when they'd said they needed his help, thought he'd open the door to find his ex on his knees and begging for forgiveness but instead he'd opened it to find him barely hanging onto life by a thread. As Magnus moved closer to examine him better, he realized that Alec probably wasn't hanging onto life. It was hanging onto him and that thought scared Magnus more than anything.
He carefully unwrapped his bandaged arms and felt the breath leave him as he did. Because Alec wouldn't do this to himself, would he? He'd thought that the case when he'd moved closer to the boy but really it still hadn't seemed possible. Why on earth would he do this? Why would he want to die?
Aku Cinta Kamu. Not that it changes anything. But it did and Magnus really couldn't deny it any longer.
"Come back to me, my love."
