It had been 6 months since the great love of my life died. Augustus Waters. The day of the
funeral I had discovered, had been my last good day. One morning I woke up in the hospital.
The fluid in my crap lungs was filling up. Faster. Dr. Maria cried when she told me the end
was near. I had been expecting it. But I was not prepared for my doctor to actually cry over
me. But like a wise person once said. Some infinities are larger than other infinities. So as I
am lying here I am thinking of all these metaphors that Augustus would have loved. And I
have to wonder. Was something Peter VanHouten said true? I am starting to think that healthy
humans are a side effect of the living. Just like I am a side effect of dying. Isaac has managed
to drag me to support group since Augustus died. Now I listen through the entire list. All the
way down to "Augustus Waters." After support group Isaac and I played Counterinsurgence.
All of a sudden I got a burst of pain in my ribs. Isaac's mom called 911 and then my parents.
They met us at the hospital. We found out that my Phalanxifor wasn't working anymore.
I had a matter of hours left. I started hallucinating. I thought I saw Augustus behind Kaitlyn
as she walked in to say goodbye. I could hear my dad
in the hallway as I drifted off to sleep. "Hazel Grace!" Augustus said. He sounded like a little
boy who just got a new puppy. "Hazel Grace! I was right! There is capital S-Something!" Then
he frowned I think he knew he would see me soon. "Okay?" He asked. "Okay." I replied.
When I woke up my dad was sitting by my bed. "Hazel." He said, he wasn't crying. "I want
you to know how much your mother and I love you. And if you can't hold on, we understand.
And we know that you won't be alone. You will be with Augustus in Heaven."
I sit in my Hospital bed. I haven't told anyone about Capital S-Something. I ask for some
paper since I can't talk very well. I wanted to write a note to my parents, so that they still have
a piece of me.
Mom and Dad,
I want you to know that if you two leave eachother just because I am not there anymore I will personally come down from capital S-Something and haunt you. I love you more than anything in this world, you were always there for me. And mom, you will always be my mother. Even when I am gone I will still be your daughter. And I love you both.
Hazel.
My doctors said that today is the day. My mom is crying my dad is crying, Augustus' parents
are crying, even Isaac. Kaitlyn bursts into the room because I asked her to be here. She pulls
up a chair and grabs my hand. I have never seen her cry. But she is crying now. The doctors
unhook my machines one by one because I asked them to. I want a quick death. I am tired of
dangling onto life by a thread. I am tired of not talking to Augustus. And I'm tired of causing my
parents pain. I can feel myself letting go. And it doesn't hurt. Suddenly I see Augustus running
to me. I am with him now. In capital S-Something.
My name is Hazel Grace Lancaster. And this was my little infinity.
