I woke cool and comfortable in the welcoming embrace of slime. In the recuperacoon I tried to stretch, unwilling to get out quite yet. I couldn't move far, the space smaller than I was used to. My hands grazed something hard, with my eyes closed it felt like the wall. A moment of rest upon it earned me the realization it had moved. Walls couldn't move. It was solid flesh beneath my fingers. I panicked. I didn't remember bringing someone home with me that morning, in fact I couldn't remember anything about the night before or the morning it lead into. Slowly I shifted, fingers searching for the recuperacoon's opening. I froze as limbs that were not mine stirred the slime as they reached out for me. A moment passed and the grip loosened. Fingers curled around the lip of the recuperation and I pulled myself out as slowly as possible.

I was less than graceful as I slid to the floor but my feet at least landed silently. I could feel my clothes as they clung to me. At least I was fully clothed. I could feel the flesh on my face heat as I wondered if whoever I had been nestled up next to had been clothed at all. I had felt bare skin. I wiped the green from my eyes as I tried to survey my surroundings in the hopes that it would jog my memory. Bits and pieces of metal lay strewn about in various stages of creation. One corner revealed wood and string snapped and disregarded. I knew where I was the moment I set my eyes upon the robots who's faces looked the worse for wear. How had I ended up in Equius's hive?

Spore slime dripped to collect as my feet while sleep called its fog from my mind. Clarity had me wishing for ignorance once again. Yesterday had not been kind to me.

Feferi, the girl whom I had grown up with, who was always there for me and had earned all of my palest pity had dumped me. Left me to wash up with the kelp and trash. She was tired of me, I'd caused her too much trouble and now that she didn't think I was a danger she was free to let me go and to move on. What was I supposed to do when my heart had been broken in two by the one troll I held dear. I had begged, pleaded with her to give me a second chance but she refused. The damage had been done. I was a terrible moirail. I'd caused her nothing but grief and she had stayed only out of obligation.

A line of purple pushed green along with it as it trailed down to my chin.

I was horrible. I loved her. She was the one troll I could count on and I had fucked things up with her royally. She left me on the beach, watching as she disappeared under the waves. I watched long after the ripples of her dive where lost upon the sand. What had I done to lose her like that? Numb my feet had started to move on their own, creating a path of their choice. I didn't care where I went. I didn't care if I went anywhere at all. All I wanted to do was fill the void that Feferi had left when she vanished beneath the waves. It only confirmed what I had always feared. I was unloveable, unpitiable. Alone was my destiny.

In my sorrow my feet dragged me across land familiar and strange. When the sun began to rise I'd simply found a shadow at the base of a cliff I'd been following and let my body give in to the exhaustion. That was the last thing I remembered. How had I ended up here, in the home of someone I might have called a friend if I didn't know the truth. He like everyone else, only put up with me because of my station.

"High blood." The rumbling voice pulled me from my musings. I had not heard Equius climb out of the recuperation. How long had I just been standing there? The puddle I left suggested it had been longer than I thought.

"Equius I'm sorry I didn't mean to make a mess. Also you can call me Eridan you know."

"It is nothing, Aurthour will clean it up." Silence followed his statement. A part of me realized that he was still wearing pants, loosening a knot that had tied itself up in my chest. He did lack a shirt however, and I tried not to stare as I remembered that it had been his muscles that seemed so solid beneath my fingers. "I apologize for the state of your clothes. I had thought it improper to just remove them."

"Thank you, I appreciate it."

"I know that we are not the same size but if you would take something from my closet I will have Authour clean the spore slime out of your clothes."

He was right, his clothes did not fit me, hanging baggy on a frame that was not as defined beneath them. Still I was grateful to be out of the damp fabric. I hated the way the slime clung clothing to skin. My strange host worked on what was likely another robot for him to vent on, fingers moving deftly to piece it all together. I just sat and watched unsure of what else I could do. I was about to go crazy from the sounds of metal against metal when he spoke again.

"My moirail tells me I am not good with feelings. However if you wish to converse with someone I can attempt to lend a hand."

My eyes widened under their lenses. Equius, the one notorious for his unusual antics was offering to help me? They fluttered back down as it was clear that he probably just felt it was his duty to help me. Sometimes I hated not knowing who really cared and who didn't because of my caste, I would never admit that to anyone.

"Its okay Equius. I just realized that I'm unpitiable is all." I had meant to sound calm, cool and collected yet my voice betrayed me, cracking on the last note. "Flushed or pale."

I said it out loud. Had I really just done that? It was the first time I'd ever admitted out loud my greatest fear. Not that it was just a fear anymore. I'd had it proven.

"I don't think you're unpitiable." There was a strain in his tone and he cranked something too hard. I heard it break as he sighed heavily.

"Its okay, you don't have to lie to me just because I'm a high blood. I know it's true so you can just admit it."

"It is not true." It was my turn to sigh. He was being stubborn like aways. How did Nepeta put up with him? When he went pick up whatever had flown off in the breaking of metal I spotted a blue bruise just beginning to form on one of his cheekbones.

"What happened?" I reached out, fingers stopping short of touching the skin though something within me begged for the contact. "You don't bruise easily."

"When I found you, you were in the throws of a daymare. I was bringing you back so you could escape the dreams in the slime when you hit me in the face."

Oops. I hadn't meant to attack him. I was grateful for the rescue from the daymares. A whole day of them would have left me frazzled and more worse off than I had been to start. There was something that shifted along his jaw, something strange. He sounded almost tender when he spoke. Equius was the last person I would have ever equated the word tender with. Yet there was the hint of a smile that tugged at his lips. It was there for only a moment but it left me speechless.

"I think Aurthour is done with your clothes." He stood too quickly, escaping the closeness my fingers had created. Sweat trickled down muscle lines. Was he avoiding my eyes?

"Equius." He didn't face me but he stiffened, hesitating at his name. "I demand you tell me what it is you're not saying."

I could see him start to shake and I instantly regretted my decision. He was a much stronger than I and if he was unhappy with anything I said he could punish me for it harshly. I watched his hand ball into a fist before curling back out. He formed a fist once, twice, three times before he turned back towards me. He still wouldn't meet my eyes behind his dark glass.

"You are not unpitiable because I have flushed feelings for you. Those are pity are they not." I blinked. That had not been what I was expecting. I stood, ignoring the pants as they slipped, threatening to fall off my hips entirely.

"Look at me." it was not a request it was an order and Equius would obey. I said nothing once his his chin moved to point at me. I had to roll up onto my toes to reach, to brush my lips along his softly. I had no words to say but I let my kiss speak for me. He returned it, arms crushing me against him. I didn't care, I welcomed the warm. Breath intermingled and lips parted only for a moment before meeting again. The void Feferi had left had not been filled but instead soothed by a heart filling with a wave of heat and red.