You told me that our father was scum for putting us through this. You said it with so much seriousness, quite unlike your normal gentle and caring nature. But then you also told me that, no matter how dumb our father was, you would still fight.

But why?

You could have just hid away, I told you. But you would be a coward. A disgrace to our family and you couldn't let him win. You had seen what he had done to that family, that innocent family who hadn't committed that crime. They were framed, but he acted like they were the scum. You tried to defend them, but it was a hopeless fight. He had set you up to act like a fool, and the family died right before your eyes. And you couldn't do a damn thing about it.

You know what is right and fair. Onii-sama, I respect you and I have always looked up to you. You know what should be done, and when to stop fighting an enemy. Rarely you have fought someone and took their life…

But you should have killed him! I was the worthless scum who couldn't even begin to dream about mastering bankai. You were still training, weren't you? So why, why couldn't you have used it on him? You could have finished him off! Why did you protect me?

But why am I worthless scum? Because I couldn't protect you. I wasn't strong enough. That's why you came with me to train, wasn't it? You were acting kind and humble, but in fact, you thought I'd be killed first-hand. You were worried about me. And you trained with me because you knew my limits, and also what I could aim at. You pushed me and it always seemed you had time for me. But why didn't you train yourself? You could have mastered bankai quickly, found him quickly, and killed him quickly.

You would have been a wonderful captain. The first true, just, and kind captain we've seen in a long time.

You shouldn't have stepped in to defend me, to block his attack. You were stronger than me, so I should have defended you, sacrificed myself…

I'm weak. That's all I'll ever be, and that's all I ever will be. Nothing will change, and I'll never be a true soul reaper. I only recently learned my zanpakuto's name. And even then, you helped me. I can't do anything on my own. I'm weak and worthless, and I am truly the scum.

But…!

You kept telling me to never give up. To believe in myself and train as hard as I could. Anyone can do it. If anyone can do that, then we'd all be perfect, right? Everyone believes in themselves right from the start, right?

Wrong. We all think that we can't do anything, but then someone comes in and says "You can do it!" and they start to believe in themselves. Why? Because they have someone out there that's cheering them on and someone who thinks they can do great in life.

But that won't help if you know you're weak and there is no one out there now that believes in you.

Why?

Because you are dead. He killed you, and soon I will be killed along with you, by his hands. Your dream will never be fulfilled. You always said you wanted to see me become strong. But now you can't, because you sacrificed yourself to save me, even though I know I'm worthless!

So why? Why did you protect me? I can never believe in myself now that you're gone. I'm weak.

You told me that our father was scum for putting us through this. You're wrong.

I am the scum.

(A/N: Oh! A Bleach fanfic? With original characters? Yes? Yes. Let the adventure begin…)